Not Alone Anymore

Practicing holds with Ronon was probably the sweetest torture Madi could ever imagine. Most of her sessions were spent in his arms in one form or another, and she knew that most of the women in Atlantis would kill to be in her position. Things were only made more difficult, though, when Sheppard came to observe her progress. He sat on the bench by the window, his arms crossed over his chest, and his face an impassive mask. She had to concentrate, to do her best to prove to him that she was worthy of her place on his team.

"Okay, ready?" Ronon asked from his place across the mat.

She took a deep breath and nodded, turning her back to him. Her hands clenched into ready fists at her sides, she steeled herself for his attack. The sound of his footsteps came only a fraction of a second before his arms wrapped around her, trying to pull her off-balance. She struck out with her free elbow, catching him in the side, but he succeeded in knocking her to the floor. She rolled to her back just as he came down on top of her, pinning her shoulders down. She bucked her hips, unseating him enough to allow her a punch to his belly. He let out a whoof of air, grabbing for her wrists and forcing them down on either side of her head as he straddled her.

She allowed herself a quick glance at his face, and her breath caught at his fiercely primal, animalistic expression. Her mind blanked, and she had to renew her focus. Okay, so you're pinned...now what? she thought. Pressing her heels into the mat, she was able to force her hips up hard enough to flip him over her shoulder. Her momentum carried her over as well, until she found herself sitting on his chest, her knees pinning his arms to his sides. Her forearm came to rest across his throat, her face mere inches away from his.

Several heartbeats passed, their gazes locked.

"I yield," he finally admitted. Madi quickly rolled off of him to her feet, allowing him to get himself up.

Sheppard rose to his feet, clapping his hands in admiration. "Well done. Mighty quick learner, I'd say," He gave her an appreciative nod.

"I have had the best instruction," she replied, happy that Sheppard was pleased with her progress.

"Well, you feel up to gettin' back out in the field?" he asked, though his tone implied it was less a question than a statement.

"We got a job?" Ronon inquired, towelling the sweat off his face. He'd learned it was surprisingly much harder to try not to hurt someone, than to try to hurt someone. As far as his trainees went, Madi'd gotten away with only a couple bruises, as opposed to the multiple stitches Sheppard seemed to require on a fairly regular basis.

"Yep. Geared up, in the gate room in an hour." Smiling, the Colonel sauntered off to perform whatever other duties he had to accomplish.

"So, you wanna grab a quick bite?" Ronon asked over his shoulder as he stuffed his towel back into his gym bag.

"Actually, I think I'd rather have a shower," Madi made a face, feeling sticky with dried sweat.

"Yeah, I'll join ya," he agreed, then froze at her shocked look, and the blush staining her cheeks. "No, No! I meant...I'm gonna head back for a shower too. Not with you...I, uh..." He ran a hand through his hair, looking away to hide his embarrassment.

"No, of course not," she replied, trying to repress the images he'd so unwittingly inspired. "Well, shall we?" she motioned to the door.

The trip back to their rooms was awkwardly silent.

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The world they met when they stepped through the gate reminded Madi painfully of her home world. It seemed nothing but dense forests covering rolling hills as far as the eye could see, with a glimpse between the trees of a river or lake gleaming in the distance. She found herself suddenly aching for the familiar sounds and smells of home...well, what had been her home. She followed somewhat sullenly as they neared a village of simple farmers, and half-listened with disinterest as Sheppard negotiated trade of their crops for Atlantis' medical supplies. She was more than relieved when they headed back for the Gate.

All through dinner, she half-heartedly poked at her food, smearing it around her plate as the others chatted, only joining in the conversation when someone posed her a direct question.

"So, you up for a little pool tournament tonight?" Sheppard asked jovially as they cleared their plates into the trash bins.

"I'm afraid I am not quite feeling up to it tonight," she replied, sighing heavily. "Perhaps another day."

Sheppard shrugged and headed off to join the others, while she made her way to the seclusion of her room as quickly as possible.

She was out on the balcony when Ronon returned hours later, a light shawl clutched about her shoulders against the night's chill. She stood so still, lost in her thoughts, that he didn't doubt she'd been out there half the night. As he stepped closer, the pale coloring of her lips and the goosebumps on her arms confirmed his thoughts.

"You're turning blue," he muttered, removing his deer-skin trench and draping it over her narrow form. He almost smiled at how small she seemed in the folds of it, almost like a child playing dress-up in her parents' clothes.

Her gaze flicked to him ever-so-briefly, then returned to the skyline. Unconsciously, she shrugged the coat a little tighter around her, though she was well aware of the smell of him that lingered on it.

"What's on your mind?" he asked after a moment of silence, leaning onto the railing beside her. He'd learned by now that this was her favourite spot to think -- or to find refuge from her thoughts.

"It's nothing," she said quietly, barely more than a whisper.

"You been acting kinda distant all day," he observed, "Since we got to that planet. What's up?"

She looked down for a moment, and he wasn't sure if she was going to answer. Finally, she turned slightly to face him, and he could see that her eyes were red from crying.

"I miss my home," she croaked, on the verge of tears again. Her lower lip quiverred as she drew a shaky breath.

He nodded sympathetically, knowing all too well what she was feeling. He reached out and pulled her against him, resting his cheek in her hair. Her arms snaked around his waist as he felt her shoulders start to heave. He said nothing as she sobbed against his chest, but tenderly laid a kiss to the top of her head, breathing in the familiar scent of her lavender shampoo. When he felt her finally calm, he stepped her back to arms' length.

"I'm sorry," she chuckled self-deprecatingly, swiping at her eyes with the back of her hand. "It's just...that planet reminded me so much...and this place is so different," She gestured to the skies above them. "Even the stars are strange."

"Every planet has different stars and constellations," he admitted, "And growing up, I was always taught to navigate by 'em. So you know what I did when I went to a new world?" He stopped to raise his eyebrows at her expectantly.

She shook her head, a look of puzzlement on her face. "No, what?"

"I'd make up new ones." he stated, pointing over to her left. "Over there, that's the warrior, just above the horizon. See, he's holding his sword over his head." She narrowed her eyes, tyring to see what he saw, then a ghost of a smile appeared, and she noodded. "And that's the hunter, chasing the four Wraith," he pointed directly overhead. Her smile grew somewhat. "Over there is the chief, standing over the slain." He pointed to a cluster of stars over what seemed a tiny pyramid of stars.

"I'm sensing a theme in your images," she chuckled slightly.

He shrugged. "You try it. Find a shape in the stars."

She flashed him an indulgent smile, and turned her gaze to the heavens. She stood staring upwards for many long minutes, while he stood merely watching her. Finally, she turned back to him with a grimace. "Well, I found something," she admitted, "Though it's nowhere near as creative as yours..."

"Show me," he smiled down at her, watching the color return to her cheeks.

"Well, you see those two stars, right over there?" She pointed, but he searched the sky vacantly. "Look," she said, tugging him by the hair down to her level.

He bent his head low over her shoulder, following her pointing finger. "Okay, yeah?"

"Then, there's the five that curve up underneath it?" she continued.

He nodded.

"Well, I call it the 'smiley face'." She chuckled, turning back to face him and suddenly finding his face barely a breath apart from hers. Her breath caught in her throat as she took a quick step backwards, only to find the balcony's railing blocking her escape.

His eyes never left hers as he closed the space between them, his hands coming to rest on the railing on either side of her, effectively pinning her in. "See, it's not so hard, is it?" he asked. "Makes a planet feel like home."

"This is my home now," she whispered, her heart pounding as his hazel eyes bored into her. He leaned ever-so-slightly closer, but she ducked underneath his arm, making a break for the safety of her room. She paused at the doorway to glance back over her shoulder, letting his trench-coat slide to the floor. "I feel much better now, thank you, Ronon."

She disappeared into her chambers so quickly, Ronon was momentarily at a loss as to what just happened. He picked up his coat -- which still held a lingering scent of lavender -- and stalked to his quarters.

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It was only a matter of hours before the entire team was roused by an insistant banging at their doors. "Full gear now!" Sheppard called, "Jumper bay in ten!"

Madi glanced quickly out her windows as she rolled off her bed to her feet. It was still dark outside, so this had to be important. Her hands trembled as she laced her boots and pulled on her vest. She waved her door open to find Ronon outside, ready to knock.

"You set?" he asked, his face an unreadable mask.

"Let's go," she acknowledged, slinging her P-90 over her shoulder, the both of them setting off for the transporter at a jog.

Shepard wasted no time with their briefing, once they'd reached the Jumper bay. "Long-range sensors found a hive ship inbound for M34-287. My team takes the South city, Lorne, you go East, Jonas, you go North. Save as many as you can."

With that, the three teams loaded into their respective shuttles and were launched through the Gate.

Madi fidgetted in her seat behind Teyla, checking for the fifth time that the safety catch on her rifle was off. She reached down to her thigh, ensuring that her sidearm pistol was ready as well. She stared out the front viewport, watching the muted lights of the city come into view. On this world, it was still the darkest hours of the night. The people sleeping had no idea of the horrors headed their way.

A strong hand suddenly grasped her knee, and she looked up into Ronon's steady gaze. "You'll do fine," he assured her, before turning back to the city in front of them.

She prayed that he was right.

Sheppard's voice resonated from the exterior speakers of the craft. "The Wraith are coming. Seek shelter!" he commanded. Below them, pandemonium broke out as they landed in the city's center. They exited the cloaked vessel to find citizens running in all directions around them.

Grabbing one, Sheppard demanded, "Where are your shelters?"

The trembling man in his grasp pointed vaguely and stammered, "Over there! Closest one's under City Hall!" Sheppard released his hold on the man, who stumbled off in the direction of a large grey building.

"Okay. You three, get as many people as you can into that shelter." Sheppard gesturded to Ronon, Teyla, and Madi with the barrel of his rifle. "McKay, you're with me." With that, he and McKay raced off into the city.

Teyla sent the others a quick nod. "Right." She moved to stand atop a low wall surrounding the building. "People! Listen! You must seek shelter this way! This way! Come!" She spun from where she stood, racing towards the entrance to the underground hiding place.

Madi spared a quick glance to the man standing beside her. "You go left," she advised him with a defiant raise of her chin, "I'll cover right." He flashed her a quick grin before taking off into the darkness.

Her heart pounding painfully, Madi had never been so terrified. It was one thing to be training for combat...but to actually be facing it? She forced herself to take a deep breath, then launched herself out into the crowd of people streaming around her. "This way!" she called, as loudly as she could, "There is shelter over here! Follow me!" She raced back towards City Hall, pointing the masses around her in the right direction. Once they seemed to be on the right path, she turned herself back towards the city. There were many families staggering helplessly at the edge of the city square. "This way!" she urged, guiding them on as she ventured deeper into the surrounding streets. There were many she encountered, some with young children, some guiding the elderly. She urged each of them towards the shelter as quickly as possible. Soon, though, she began to hear a whining noise in the distance, closing fast, which she recognized from the others' descriptions as Darts. "Hurry, now!" she cried to the family she'd just encountered. They had four children with them, the mother and father carrying the youngest two. The eldest was a boy of about fourteen, and Madi pushed him on ahead of her, telling him to run his fastest. She scooped up the other child, a girl of about six, and ran pell-mell for the safety of the shelter.

Reaching the broad doors that led underground, Madi dropped the girl to her feet, ushering her in with the others. The whine of the Darts was growing closer, but she remained at the doorway, rushing the citizens inside. Teyla joined her, and together they urged as many inside as they could.

"We must close the doors now!" the older woman yelled to her over the drone of the incoming ships and the panicked screaming of the people.

"Where's Ronon?" Madi yelled back, scanning the thinning crowd as they made their way inside.

Teyla merely shook her head. "There's no time!" she insisted, grabbing Madi by the forearm and forcefully dragging her back behind the bulkhead.

Madi cast her gaze helplessly across the now almost empty square, her heart in her throat. Suddenly, she caught movement in one of the adjoining alleys. "There!" she cried, laying her hand against the massive door to prevent it from closing. Ronon ran towards them, carrying two young children, while a pair of adults ran along behind him.

At that same moment, the sound of a Dart whined overhead, it's beam already reaching the outer edge of the square.

"Ronon!" Madi cried, "Ronon, hurry!"

He and the family he was leading dove behind the protective bulkhead doors, just as they closed out the Dart's deadly beam.

He lay panting on the floor for a long moment, as Madi rushed to his side. "Are you okay?" she asked, laying a gentle hand on his shoulder.

He shook her off roughly, pushing himself to his feet. He glanced around quickly to make sure that the family had moved themselves safely down the stairs, then spun on her angrily. "You should have closed the doors. That Dart could have taken us, and then you and everyone else in here." he hissed, though he was careful to pitch his voice so that none of the others could hear.

Madi took a defensive step backwards. "You made it to the door well before the Dart did," she stated.

"And if I didn't?" he countered, taking her by the shoulders and shaking her hard enough that her head cracked off the stone wall behind her. He knew he'd pushed her too far when she met him with that defiant stare of hers. "You're reckless," he spat, shoving away from her and disappearing into the gloom below.

"Would you have done differently?" she wondered to his retreating back.

He paused in his steps, but he was too far away for her to see.