Time, Death & Scar Tissue...

19. Questions and Observations

Kathryn grabbed her shirt after he left the room. She knew he would be upset if she was wearing it when he came back, but at least she wanted it where she could reach it if she needed to get up. She set it on the nightstand and got under the covers, putting the pillows back where they were. When it seemed clear that her body wasn't going to let her get comfortable, she pulled the shirt on and went into the bathroom. After making sure that she wasn't bleeding again she felt relieved, but still took a couple of Tylenol, hoping to ease the ache.

For a few seconds she considered asking Corey how long it would take for her to simply enjoy sex without the pain and ache after, but she rejected almost as soon as it crossed her mind. Corey would only embarrass her. She would ask her grandmother when they spoke again. At least she could trust her grandmother to tell her the truth and not make fun of her.

When she emerged again he was waiting for her. She still found it hard to take the shirt off with him watching though she couldn't understand why. She had practically attacked the man earlier. She wrapped the sheet around herself and settled against him again. He handed her a glass of juice and she drank it as he sipped his ubiquitous red. The comfortable silence was becoming familiar. He took the glass from her when she finished and Kathryn put her head down on his shoulder, her eyes half closed.

“I should daydream more often.” She said softly. She felt his chuckle as much as she heard it.

“Was the reality as satisfying as the fantasy?” His arm tightened around her waist.

“The reality was much better.” Her fingers traced his chest.

“Were you able to accomplish anything before you started your daydreaming?” He brushed his lips over her forehead.

“Yes. The story is taking shape better than I thought it would. It's still rough and sketchy, but I don’t have to force the words out.” Her body was completely relaxed against him.

“None of your books read as if you have to force words out.” His fingers trailed lightly up and down her back.

“Of course not, but you should have seen all the topics I went through before I finally hit on something Paul wanted to talk about.” She laughed softly. “I think I must have started this one fifteen times only to get a page or two in and find he had nothing more to say.”

“You talk about him as if he's a person.” Kathryn's eyes were closed, but she heard the small smile in his voice.

“I know it sounds crazy, but in a way he is. I don't think of any of my other recurrent characters that way, so I don't know what makes him so special. I think it irks my editor though.” She laughed softly.

“Why is that?”

“She says I have made horror distinctly un-horrifying.” Kathryn laughed softly. “I tell her that I don't like the horror label and she should find some other genre that fits me better.”

“What would you prefer, considering your subject?” His fingers massaged her neck lightly.

“I always wanted to call it what it is, historical fiction.” She looked up at him and caught the mild look of surprise. “The fact that Paul is-” She felt the word get caught again. “Is revenant has nothing to do with the stories really. He doesn't behave like some gothic monster and I just can't bring myself to think of him that way.”

“What do you believe him to be?” His cool fingers stroked her cheek softly, his eyes curious.

“He’s a person with some unusual needs and a very long life.” Kathryn stretched a little and closed her eyes again. “Something else that runs in my family I suppose. Grandmother was offended too when she saw 'Horror' on the first book.”

Kathryn felt herself drifting off again. He kissed her softly and turned her so that her back rested against his chest. One hand finding her breast and squeezing gently. She moaned softly, and even as close as she was to sleep the possessive nature of the gesture was not lost on her. She squirmed a little and the settled against him again. She wasn't completely comfortable with his possessive side, but moments like this it felt very right and very safe.

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Kathryn was impressed with how easily the story was coming together. She supposed it could be because Corey seemed to have a sudden change of heart and that had eased the feeling of being torn between the two of them, but that change didn't seem entirely normal. Corey tended to hold onto ideas with an iron grip, even if she was completely wrong. For her to do this kind of about face on an issue made Kathryn wonder what had happened. When she had mentioned it to Lucien his reaction hadn't done much to settle her mind either. It wasn't anything that he said or did specifically, but the impression that he knew more than he was telling was distinct. The more she thought about it though, the less sense it made that he would know anything about it. She was simply projecting her own feelings.

In the beginning she had spent a couple of nights at home, even though he made it clear that he preferred she stay there. Kathryn didn't like the idea of just staying there all the time because he said so. It was obvious though that she didn't sleep well without him and after two restless nights she gave in and started sleeping there. She told herself that it was because she had everything she needed to work there now and it was much more convenient than bringing research materials and her laptop back and forth with her every evening and to some extent that was true. If she was honest with herself she knew that at least part of her restlessness came from knowing that she was going against his expressed desire. It still bothered her when he told her what she was going to do, not so much because he was doing the telling but because she was simply accepting so much of it without questioning it. She was becoming uncomfortably familiar with that part of her that jumped to simply obey him. Expecting compliance seemed to be a part of his nature, that didn't mean that BEING compliant was a part of hers.

Arguing with him was useless exercise though, he almost always won and when he didn't it was because he decided to compromise on some minor point, not because she convinced him to see her side. She had never met anyone she couldn't get her own way with just by using simple persuasion. The thought had crossed her mind to try and be a bit more manipulative, but she was sure that he would see through that and she didn't want to jeopardize the closeness that had formed. As difficult as it was for her to accept his control, the thought of losing the unguarded moments that he shared with her was almost physically painful.

There were other things that bothered her too, though they seemed less important as time went on. She had never met anyone that was never warm to the touch. When she did feel the warmth of a bath on his skin it seemed strange and almost uncomfortable in a way. He never ate with her at the apartment and he never seemed to eat or drink anything that she brought in. Several times he had taken her out for a meal. Those were not simple occasions and she was almost too surprised to eat herself. She was sure that he ate somewhere, she just wondered where.

None of the quirks she noticed were things that rose to the level of questioning him. She was sure that if there was something important in it he would tell her when he felt comfortable.