Within Your Heart

The next day went much the same way. Merlin delved into magic books through the morning, learning new secrets and spells. His look of absolute joy when a spell was successful pleased Arthur more than he would let on. He quickly realised he was watching Merlin more than he was reading his book. The boy had become completely fascinating to him. Merlin, being the idiot that Arthur kept insisting he was, remained oblivious to the intent sapphire gaze. This suited Arthur well enough.

Lunch was a hearty stew that Gwen had once again convinced the kitchen staff to make. Not that the kitchen staff needed much convincing. They all agreed that Merlin was too skinny and were quite willing to cook anything to make sure he got a good meal.

Once more the pair ended up outside in the snow. This time however, they worked together and built a snowman. With a little bit of extra help from Merlin’s magic the snowman started to look like a dragon. The wings were impossible to build with snow the way Merlin had wanted them, so with a little extra help the dragon’s wings spread wide. Finally, beside the dragon Arthur stood a stick upright, grinning triumphantly. Merlin gave him a puzzled look,

“What’s that for?” Arthur’s grin became wider, revealing more of his sharp teeth.

“Well, obviously the dragon is me.” Merlin raised a sceptical eyebrow. “A dragon is my coat of arms you know.” Merlin thought for a moment.

“Oh yeah.” He smiled a little sheepishly, remembering the various dragons around the castle he had noticed. “But that still doesn’t explain the stick.” Arthur’s grin remained even as he crossed his arms.

“Isn’t it obvious?” Merlin shook his head. “It’s you.” Merlin frowned.

“How is that me?” Arthur looked the stick up and down then turned to Merlin, cocking his head to one side and doing a similar appraisal.

“That’s not funny you know.” Arthur burst into fits of laughter and got a snowball in his face for his efforts.

-x-

The three head members of the household looked from their viewpoint at the window at the two below.

“He’s laughing,” Gwen said, a little stunned.

“I never thought I would live to see that happen,” Gaius breathed.

“I really do think that Merlin is the best thing to have happened to this place,” Lancelot added with a smile. “Who knows, he may well and truly be our hero.”

“Who would have thought, a skinny country boy getting through to his highness and actually making him laugh,” Gaius murmured fondly.

“Appearances can be deceiving,” Gwen said sighing happily. “It’s what’s inside that counts.” Gaius hummed his agreement.

“All we can hope for is that Merlin agrees with you.” The three lapsed back into silence again.

-x-

“Tonight, Lance.”

“But sire I don’t-”

“If I don’t do something like this now… I might never get the chance.” Arthur looked at his reflection sadly. “I don’t want to lose him, Lance.” The sword straightened himself up confidently.

“You won’t. Be bold! Daring! Yet suave and sophisticated. Sweep him off his feet and declare your love-”

“I never said love,” Arthur told the sword firmly. Lancelot gave the prince a ‘look’.

“Perhaps not, but I know you think it. We can all see how you’ve changed. Just tell him how you feel.”

“Tell him how I feel. Right. I can do that.” He stared at his reflection, taking in the golden scales, the sharp teeth, the fur. His sapphire eyes grew wide in fear. “I can’t do that.” Lancelot suppressed a laugh.

“Why not? You love him don’t you?” Arthur gave him an uncomfortable look before lowering his gaze and sighing.

“Yes.”

“I don’t think he would turn you away like you think he would.”

“I just… For the first time in my life I am really unsure of everything.”

“And that is why you must do this,” Lancelot advised him carefully. Arthur finally nodded.

-x-

Merlin walked nervously down the stair case, his fingers clutching the banister a little tighter than was needed, but it stopped him from shaking. How had it gone from his hating this castle to being completely content and now nervous? He pulled at the cravat around his throat slightly. He felt a bit like a parading peacock and it was something he was so unused to.

The clothes he wore were finer and softer than anything he had ever come into contact with. He had argued with Gwen and Will that it was too much, but they had insisted. The pitcher had also been extremely adamant that he wore the blue jacket with the silver embroidery. She had said that it brought out the colour of his eyes, before she began to stutter and apologise. A long waistcoat in a brighter blue worked as a background to the jacket with the white cravat framing his neck. White breeches shaped his legs, showing off their length, with the knee high black boots only adding to the picture he made.

Gwen couldn’t help but tell him how handsome he looked. Merlin had just turned a fetching shade of pink. Looking in the mirror he had wondered what his mother would have thought if she could see him dressed like this. His heart sunk a little. It was the only thing that ruined his happiness. Knowing his mother wasn’t around.

He now stood fidgeting at the bottom of the stairs, not really knowing what to do. His fingers were unconsciously forming small flames at their tips, a new spell he had learned earlier in the day.

“You should be careful you don’t set fire to yourself.” Merlin jumped at the sound of the deep voice above him. He turned and smiled anyway. Arthur paused in his descent, taking in the form standing below him. He had never seen Merlin look more handsome than he did then. He could have even been a prince himself, despite his slight fidgeting. Arthur had to stop himself staring. He finally made it to the bottom of the stairs and bowed to Merlin, who then blushed bright red along his high cheek bones.

“I- I’m sorry, I wasn’t-”

“You look wonderful,” Arthur interrupted nervously, not making eye contact with Merlin.

“Oh, um, thank you. You look nice too.” He glanced over to Arthur, dressed in red and brown. A complete contrast to Merlin, but still somehow complimenting him. A brown shirt pulled tight at the waist by a leather belt but open at the neck covered his broad torso. Brown breeches covered his legs but he wore nothing on his feet, the large back paws not helping in the matter. A bright red jacket gave a strong hit of colour which complimented his gold scales perfectly. The jacket had been made so that his wings could be free. They flapped slightly with Arthur’s tenseness.

“Will you join me for dinner?” Arthur asked, his tone uncertain remembering the reply he got last time he asked the question. Merlin nodded his head, also remembering the incident. Arthur held out his arm and feeling a little foolish, Merlin took it. His embarrassment was quickly forgotten when he was led into the dining room, which was glowing with the light of many candles and two places had been set at the table. Conversation had been slightly awkward to begin with but they quickly fell into the light camaraderie that they had achieved and Merlin was soon talking about Ealdor and the people there. Uther remained strictly out of bounds of course. It was a memory Merlin thought that Arthur didn’t need to know about.

After dinner they walked outside together. The moon hung bright and whole on a deep blue sky pin pricked by tiny stars. The moon made the entire landscape shine white as the snow reflected the pale light. It seemed as if some of the stars had fallen from the sky and had sprinkled the ground with their dust as the ground sparkled and shimmered. It was silent apart from Merlin’s and Arthur’s breathing which sent small clouds into the air before it disappeared. Merlin shivered. Arthur looked at him, concern shining in his eyes.

“I’m fine.” Merlin smiled brightly, trying to reassure the prince. He let his gaze fall back on the view. “It’s so beautiful out here.” Arthur agreed while still staring at the sorcerer next to him. His skin was pale in the moonlight, making him seem as ethereal as the snow covered world around him. His eyes sparkled in the limited light. Merlin seemed to belong to this world and it made Arthur breathless. How could he have not seen it before? Merlin was beautiful.

“Would you like a different view?” Merlin looked at him questioningly. “Do you trust me?”

“Yes.” It was a whisper, barely heard, but it was enough. Arthur wrapped his arms around Merlin’s waist and jumped. Arthur felt the boy he held cling to him for dear life and bury his head against his chest as he beat his wings to gain altitude. “You can look now,” he whispered softly. Merlin slowly moved away from clinging to Arthur to look around him. There was a slight rise and fall which Merlin could feel in his stomach as Arthur flapped his wings to keep them aloft. Below them the land spread away like a map come to life. The world was painted silver and black below them. The castle lay directly under them but in the distance it was possible to see tiny golden lights, proof that people existed beyond the castle walls that Merlin had come to consider more of a home. He wondered at what point that had happened. It certainly no longer felt like a prison. He wanted to be there. He wanted to be with Arthur. He wanted to be where he was now. He turned his gaze back to the beast that held him, his eyes watering slightly.

“Thank you. For this. I could never have imagined…” he trailed off, his voice sticking in his throat. He felt himself shiver, but now he wasn’t sure if it was from the cold or from the warm arms that held him tightly so that he wouldn’t be dropped. Not that Arthur would drop him. And if he did fall, somehow Merlin knew that Arthur would catch him. He had never known anyone like that. He had never trusted anyone like that, and yet with Arthur he would trust him with his life. He felt the tears escape. The realisation was almost too much for him to take in. He jumped when he felt something warm against his cheek. He blushed wildly when he realised it was Arthur’s tongue. “What are you…?”

“I didn’t want to see you crying. I didn’t want to let you go to wipe them away so… I’m sorry I shouldn’t have-”

“No! It’s- it’s ok. It was sort of nice… Actually.” Now Merlin could feel the blood burning his cheeks. Arthur looked at him, surprised.

“It doesn’t bother you?”

“Not any more,” Merlin admitted. “There is more to you than meets the eye, Arthur. With you it’s what’s inside that counts. You’re a good person really. Besides, I have actually been wondering about your tongue for a while. Oh my- Forget I said that.” There was a slight cocky look in Arthur’s eyes.

“Have you indeed?” Merlin looked down at Arthur’s chest and noticed the pendant that hung there for the first time. It became immediately interesting. “I could show you more.” His voice had dropped and was now somewhat suggestive. Merlin couldn’t feel the cold now. He knew he had turned completely red but was thankful that in the moonlight it was impossible to tell.

“I- uh- I-”

“Do you trust me?” a whisper against Merlin’s ear. Merlin looked at Arthur as best he could while still being held tight and too far off the ground to be even remotely safe. He could see the sharp teeth and could almost feel the claws in his back, but Merlin knew Arthur would not hurt him really.

“With my life,” he finally whispered back. He felt that warm tongue run up the side of his ear and he moaned louder than he meant to. “Arthur.” The name had become a moan and he shuddered, knowing full well that this time it was definitely not because it was cold. He could feel Arthur laugh, a deep vibration through his chest.

“I think I found a weak spot.” Merlin moaned again when Arthur continued to lick at his ear and then down his neck. Arthur quickly realised they could not continue the way they were going while being in the air. He was worried that Merlin might wriggle a little too much and slip from his grasp. He was definitely not going to let that happen. Arthur slowly let them fall to Earth and made sure Merlin was stable on his feet before he let go. Being able to see the sorcerer clearly now in the light that spilled from the castle, he could see how flushed Merlin was and how dark his eyes had gone. With a smile that wasn’t forced, Arthur led Merlin back inside. Merlin went willingly, stomach writhing in anticipation for the unknown.

-x-

The enchanted objects watched them pass together.

“Where are they… oh they’re not… they can’t… how?” Gwen stumbled over her words in surprise. Lancelot looked absolutely thrilled and took Gwen in his grip and kissed her the best he could. “Oh that was nice,” she murmured happily.

“Who knows how. But they will find a way I’m sure.” Gaius smiled. “Let’s not think on that. Let’s just hope, shall we?” The others agreed. It was the happiest they had all been for a long time.