A Cheer for Sweet Revenge

It was a cold, stormy night. Sam was in 'Cheers' bar, looking sad and lonely. He was thinking about Diane. Diane had made Sam angry, she was a typical women. Diane would nag at Sam and call him names, including 'stupid', 'moron' and duh brain'. Today Sam had had enough. Diane had hit him in the face with a spoon, that was the spoon which broke the camel's back. Suddenly there was a knock at the door; it was Carla.



"Hey Sam what's up" Said Carla.



"Nothing much" Said Sam "I'm just so mad at Diane right now.



"What'd she do" said Carla.



Sam told her: "She called me an idiot and threw grapes at me. The grapes hit me in my eyes and temples."



"I don't get it Sam." Said Carla. "You have all these dames interested and you invest all your time in that stupid idiot Diane, I think she needs to be put in her place"



With Carla's last words ringing in his ears Sam looked at the door and saw Norm coming through it. "Hey Norm" he said.



"Hey Sam, look what I got. Said Norm. "A whole salmon. I found it in the freezer. I'm keeping it in tin foil so it will stay cool".



"That's good Norm" said Sam. "Can I have some salmon?"



"Sure buddy" said Norm.



Cheer's patrons were going home and Sam was clearing the place up. He was thinking about all the annoying things Diane had said to him. Then the phone rang, Sam picked it up.



"Hey Sam, it's me Coach" Said Coach



There was a voice which made Sam feel safe and secure, Coach was always there for Sam. A true friend. Coach had never let Sam down.



"Hey Coach what can I do for you" Said Sam.



"Sam, I got something to tell you" Said Coach. "I'm coming down to cheers to tell you".



"OK" said Sam.



Suddenly Diane came into cheers. She said "Sam, you are a good for nothing lazy pig. Like most men you have forgotten my birthday and this irritates me. Frasier never forgets my birthday. You are an idiot."



Sam could no longer contain himself. The blood was boiling in his veins. Sam felt his face redden, his hands clenched into fists. He raised his manly arm and struck Diane a blow to the jaw, knocking her down.



"Sam! My God! You are a beast!" Said Diane.



This only enraged Sam further. He punched Diane in the face knocking her front teeth out. Blood splattered over Sam's manly face, his chiseled jaw stood out as if he was carved into mount Rushmore. Sam's fiery eyes looked at Diane as his mighty hands clasped her neck, shaking her like a rag doll. Diane gurgled like a babbling brook, a single tear rolled down her pale cheek and landed on Sam's strong, muscular thumb. There was a snap and it was all over. Diane was dead, a lifeless dead Diane Chambers. She was dead! But his victory was short lived, Sam realized he was in big trouble. At that moment Coach came through the door.



"Sam, I gotta tell ya something!" Said Coach.



"Not now Coach, I have an emergency to attend to" Said Sam



"But this is an emergency Sam. I gotta tell ya now!" Said Coach. "You are my best buddy. We have so much in common, we both like baseball. But I don't think I can just be friends anymore. I want more Sam, I want a relationship. I love you Sam. I think you are manly and strong."



Sam just stood there silently, tears welling up in his eye's. "Coach, I've waited so long to hear that. I want you right now".



Sam strode masculinely over to Coach and ran his strong fingers down his chest. He unbuttoned his shirt, revealing Coach's soft pink nipples. Sam bent down and lapped at Coach's nipple like a puppy licking an icicle. Then Coach placed his soft red lips against Sam's cheek and kissed him gently, before making his way down to Sam's mouth and kissing that too. Then Coach placed his hand on Sam's crotch and felt the bulging, masculine love pipe waiting for action.



"Don't speak" Said Coach. "I want this moment to last forever".



Coach's head bobbed back and forth in front of Sam's crotch like a child's yoyo. Sam moaned in ecstasy and placed his hand on the back of Coach's head. Sam felt perfectly safe with Coach, as a butterfly in a cocoon. Finally Sam had found true love, an eternal love that would last forever.