Something Suggestive and Scientific Sounding

Chapter 1: The Roommate Agreement: Sheldon's Deal

Penny and Leonard were lying in bed, silently enjoying a moment of post-orgasmic bliss, when they heard a loud crash coming from the living room.



"What was that?" Penny asked half-aware confusion, still reveling in the "full" feeling she had from their actions only moments before.



"That would be Sheldon.  He's been working on a new project and reached a wall - he's been kinda stumped for the last few days and hasn't been sleeping well."  Leonard replied, still having yet to pull out of her - content to stay inside for as long as he could get away with it. "I'm not going to lie, I'm starting to get worried about him; he hasn't been this frantic since they canceled Firefly and he tried to plan the destruction of the people responsible."



"That bad?  He's probably just stressed out.  There has to be something we can do to help, what do you do to relieve stress?"



"Bubble bath, video games, ...have sex with you."  He emphasized the last point by squeezing her right hip with his hand



"That's it!"  Penny exclaimed, obviously excited.



"What's it?"  Leonard asked, obviously wary.



"We just need to help Sheldon get some.  So what's his deal?  Does he like guys?  Women?  Both?"



Leonard laughed slightly, "I don't think he has a thing.  My best educated-guess would be that he either doesn't feel any attraction to either gender, or he has no idea himself."



"How wouldn't he know?"  Penny asked.  She knew that he kept to a strict schedule based off of ambition and a complete knowledge of himself and the limits of his body.



"He's always viewed it as an unnecessary waste of time, it stands to reason that he would have dismissed the subject and the feelings involved as soon as they came up."



Penny perked at this information.  "Wait a second, so you're telling me that our Sheldon is a virgin?" She gave an unintended squeeze at this thought, which did not go unnoticed by Leonard.



"Well, yeah.  So how could we go about helping him with it?  He doesn't even let anyone touch him..."  He felt himself beginning to harden.



Penny was quiet for a moment.  "...There's someone - some ones - that he let's touch him."  She turned her head to give him a pointed look.



Leonard thought for a couple seconds before he spoke, "Well, besides his mother and mimaw, the only people he lets touch him are... me (his best friend and roommate of several years) and..."  He stopped and tightened his grip on her hip.  "And after taking care of him when he was sick, you."



Penny smiled, "I noticed you didn't sound upset with us being the only people who could possible do this."



"I suppose it needs to be done." She felt him twitch and harden completely.  "There are worse things than losing your virginity to someone who cares about you, and we do already care about and take care of him."



She saw him smile and squeezed him again as they heard another crash coming from Leonard and Sheldon's living room.  "It sounds pretty rough out there, we should hurry."



__________

Nothing could have prepared them for the scene that greeted them when they stepped into the common area.  Sheldon was perched on top of a stool like a stone gargoyle, motionless and gaze unwavering as he surveyed his domain.  He was surrounded by half a dozen white boards full of writing - two of which had been knocked onto the floor.  The entire room had been reformed from impeccable to organized chaos.  What's more, he had taken his shirt off and was using it as a turban.



"Hey, buddy," Leonard began.  "What are you doing?"



"I'm trying to figure out why the affected particles in this system are behaving like they have no mass."  Sheldon said, gaze fixed on the board directly in front of him.



"Cool, cool." Leonard replied, as Penny stepped around the workspace to approach Sheldon.  "Me and Penny were thinking that you take a break..."



He was cut off immediately by Sheldon, "Break!?  I don't need breaks, I need answers.  Somewhere in this SWAMP of unbalanced formulas, squats the toad of truth."



"Toad of truth?  Is that a Physics thing?"  Penny asked.



"No, that's a crazy thing." Said Leonard.



"Sweetie, you need to stop for just a moment.  Why don't you put... whatever this is on the back-burner and work on another important problem that needs your immediate attention?"  Penny asked as she stepped the white board and placed her hands on his shoulders, giving a genuine smile when he didn't even flinch.



"What would that be, Penny?"  Sheldon asked, finally noticing the tension that had built up as Penny starting massaging his shoulders.



"We need to figure out what your deal is so that we can help you relieve yourself."  She still had that smile on her face as he turned a confused look her way.



"I won't argue that I could use some relief," this sentiment was punctuated by a small moan as Penny worked out a knot, "But I'm a little confused as to what you mean by my 'deal', could you clarify the term?"



"She's... we're asking what your sexual orientation is, so that we could help you out."  Leonard interjected.



"Excuse me?"  Sheldon was baffled, not to mention too exhausted to rant after days without sleep. 



"Sheldon, I know that sexual activity is pretty low on your list of priorities..." Leonard was quickly interrupted.



"Sexual activity isn't ON my list of priorities Leonard.  It never has been."  Sheldon gave him an exasperated look, though it soon became half-hearted as Penny worked her way up to his neck.  "Besides, I wouldn't be able to tell you - I've never even considered someone in the right sense to gauge my attraction to them."  Unnoticed by him, Leonard sent a smirk Penny's  way.



"Sheldon, you're a physicist right?"  Penny asked.  "So you're always looking for the answers to the most important question of the galaxy or whatever, right?"



"Yes, Penny, I am a physicist; and no, I'm not just looking for the anwers to the galaxy, I'm looking for the truth of our Universe - doing my part as a man of science to unravel the threads of reality so that we may weave our own fate."  He responded, eyes half-lidded from relaxation as Penny worked his neck.



"Sheldon, would you say that your role in this endeavor is critical to Mankind's success?"  Leonard asked, moving closer to the two of them so that he could look both of them in the eyes.



"Of course - I have an IQ unmeasurable by conventional standards and while I have no proof, I consider myself to be of the next level of human evolution, a Homo Novus if you will."



"So it stands to reason that whatever is healthy for you is what's best for everyone, and that you have obligation to do what's best for you, correct?"  Leonard prodded, moving closer and putting his hands on Sheldon's knees.



"Well... I suppose, I can't argue with that."



"Come on, Sheldon, we'll help you figure it out."  Penny said, her heart fluttering when he finally turned his head and looked at her with a small grin and an intense look. "Besides, sex isn't dirty."



Sheldon knew she was referring to the morality of the act - they were all aware of his hellish existence early on in life, growing up in East Texas, right in the middle of the Bible Belt, but still felt the need to point out, "But it's not clean either."  He hesitated for a moment. "...Alright, the experimentation is going to be easy enough - we'll meet in Leonard's room in half an hour.  If we're going to do something like animals, we don't need to smell like them - so we'll each need to take a shower."  With this statement, he left his perched position between them and headed straight for the shower - with the odd feeling that he was being hunted.



Penny and Leonard watched him intently as he left, both silent until he left their view entirely.  Finally, Leonard turned to her and spoke.



"He has a point, we were having sex before we came out here."



Penny nodded, "I know.  And I can't believe that we're actually going to do this,"  she smiled menacingly, "I'm gonna bag me a virgin, Junior Rodeo style!"  She left for her apartment to take a shower.



"Oh no, not Junior Rodeo."





__________

It wasn't often that Sheldon Cooper was surprised.  In fact, it often seemed as though he either knew exactly what was going to happen or he was able to derive the possible outcomes of any situation.  But this situation was different - he had no experience to draw on regarding the question of his orientation to one or both of the sexes.  He knew the possible outcome, but since none could be eliminated before the experiment, he was adverse to the logical statement "The solution is going to be an element of the set of all solutions."  If he accepted that as an answer, he'd be no better than someone with a Master's Degree who taught beginner Matrix Theory.  He laughed derisively at the thought.



Still though, Sheldon knew that something had to be wrong with him if he was actually considering going through with this; even with his general lack of knowledge in the field of social interaction, he could tell that something was a little off.  That being said, he also knew that mankind depended on him - so taking care of this issue whilst letting his subconscious mind work through his current project seemed like an acceptable use of his time.  Not to mention that Penny had hit the nail on the head earlier when she mentioned his curiosity.  After all, he was always looking for the answers to Mankind's greatest questions, and being a mortal man with that kind of drive he couldn't  help but want to experience whatever he could (within reason) before he died.



The arrival of Leonard and Penny tore him from his thoughts as another wave of surprise hit him - he was actually disappointed that they were wearing clothes when they entered Leonard's room.  He absently noted that when their eyes clouded once they gazed at him.



"Wow, Sheldon,"  Penny said as she crossed the room to sit next to him on the bed, "I never pegged you as one to take the initiative."  She sat on his right side and placed her left hand on the back of his neck and her right hand on his thigh.



"I believe you're mistaken.  It was the two of you who were the ones to interrupt my research and bring up the topic that lead to this predicament."  He felt her start to rub back and forth on his leg, getting a little higher each time.  The good doctor couldn't help but notice the fierce blush that filled her face as she let her gaze drift down.



"I think she's talking about the fact that you were already naked when we walked into the room."  Said Leonard as he sat on the side opposite of Penny.



Penny was undressing, she had already flung her shirt and shorts off to the other side of the room.  She hadn't been wearing panties, though she did have on a bra.  As she reached back to unhook it, she felt it fall off before she reached the clasp.  She stared at a victorious looking Sheldon as he folded it before setting it down on the nightstand.  It all happened so fast that she couldn't hide her shock.



"How'd you do that?"  She asked with a look of amazement as she finally reached over and grasped him.



Sheldon moaned as he felt the blood rush away from his brain.  "It's a simple device that utilizes four hooks in its clasp.  Child's play."   He shuddered as he felt Leonard's warm breath on his ear.



"Are you ready, Sheldon?"  Leonard asked, voice low.



"I suppose that I am, ye-"  Sheldon was cut short as Penny kissed him, maintaining her slow pumping of his growing cock.  After a moment, she pulled away from the kiss and started trailing down his chest.  "That was much more pleasant than I had tho-"



Leonard had roughly turned Sheldon's head so that he could pillage his mouth.  While the style of this kiss was different (Leonard used more tongue and a less gentle technique than Penny had), it was no less pleasant.  Sheldon could feel himself growing extremely warm - and as Penny finally reached her destination and playfully kissed the tip of his dick (having left a trail of hickeys from his neck to abdomen), he could feel himself beginning to melt.



Leonard disengaged from the kiss and moved behind Sheldon.  He took Sheldon's hands and placed them in Penny's hair, guiding him in massaging her scalp and occasionally tugging her hair as she began to suck his dick.



"How does Penny's mouth feel, Sheldon?"  Leonard asked. "How does it feel to have her in that position?  To guide her head as SHE pleasures YOU?"  He sucked on Sheldon's ear for a moment before speaking again, "You like it don't you?  You like having that power over her, controlling her..."  Before Sheldon could answer, his whole body tensed as he reached his first orgasm. 



A strangled gasp was all the warning that Penny received before the first shot went down her throat.  "Penny!"  The second shot landed on her lips and chin as she pulled him out of her mouth, "Penny!"  The final ejaculation sailed over her head and landed on the bra he had neatly folded only minutes before, "Penny!" 



Finally, he collapsed like a marionette that had its strings cut.  Penny wiped her face with a nearby tissue (Leonard always had some in his room.  In fact the roommates had them available in every room as a precautionary measure), then she moved up to kiss Sheldon again.  He happily responded.  She pulled away after his breathing started to even out a couple minutes later.



"So tell me Sweetie, what does East Texas hospitality say about reciprocation?"  She gave him a pointed look, and he gazed back with a passion that she had never seen in his eyes before.



Doctor Cooper licked his lips and then looked down at her body, gaze slowly drifting upward.  He didn't respond until he met her eyes again, "It says that it's customary to return a favor."



Penny grinned at the boys before lying down on then bed.  "Ready to get to work, Dr. Cooper?"  She said as she opened her legs and used her hand to spread her pussy lips. 



Sheldon wasted no time in getting on his knees and approaching her.  This was a moment of pure fascination for him - while he had seen diagrams and read several biology books in his time,  he had never personally witnessed a real vagina before.  If he was to be honest, he had never even watched pornography before.  He was out of his element, he was about to do something new, he was excited.



He lowered his head and began to test the waters - he licked up and down the labia, bit the inside of her thigh, and just spent a couple minutes trying various things to check her reaction, keeping careful note of her breathing, heart rate (he could feel her pulse), and movement.  Sheldon was more than a lttle surprised by how much he actually liked her taste, he was less surprised by how good he felt when he could control her like this.  He smirked devilishly once he observed her reaction to him firmly sucking on her clitoris.



To say that Sheldon focused his attentions there would be an understatement.  He spent the next several minutes trying out different approaches:  stabbing it with his tongue, lavishing attention from different angles, sucking, nibbling.  When he felt Leonard massaging his testicles, he had a moment of inspiration - he could use his hands as well.  While Penny had been moaning in appreciation during the entire affair, she almost screamed when he slipped two fingers inside of her.  He used his thumb to circle her clit as his index and middle fingers kept pistoning in and out of her - he disengaged his mouth and moved up to speak into her ear.



"I don't know much about this area of human interaction, Penny.  However,"  he continued as he found her G-spot, "I do understand that many men seem to think that females will break if they are too rough during such activities."  He stopped his hand movements and her eyes were finally able to focus on him. "Such fallacies hold no weight with me; I know exactly what you can handle.  Leonard, if you could help me restrain the poor girl?"  He moved back down as Leonard let go of him and grabbed Penny's hips hard enough to bruise, ensuring that she couldn't move below the torso.



Sheldon hooked his left arm around her right leg and used that hand to help display the clit more prominently (which he took immediate advantage of, attaching his lips to it and sucking roughly - occasionally beating it around with his tongue).  He used two fingers from his right hand to apply pressure to her G-spot again, rubbing the inside of her pussy firmly and carefully going a little deeper with the thrust each time.  Soon, Penny started to convulse and even with Leonard's help it was difficult to keep her still as he continued to assault her - determined to make her feel just as good as she had made him feel, if not better. 



Finally, the convulsing stopped and she tensed up - body locking in place as her back arched.  Her moaning had stopped, but her mouth was still open in a silent scream.  Sheldon continued for a few moments before deciding to give her a reprieve and moving so that he was on top of her.



"Soft Clitty, warm Clitty

Little ball of nerves

Happy Clitty, twitchy Clitty

Purr Purr Purr"



He sang softly into her neck, before tilting his head so that he could kiss her (an action returned with much enthusiasm).  Their moment was soon broken by Leonard, who had moved behind Sheldon and had surprised him with a firm slap on the ass.



"Sheldon," Leonard began, voice darkening, "I hope you know that you're not finished yet, I still need to be taken care of."  He emphasized this point by spanking Sheldon harshly, twice on either cheek - quickly turning them a fierce red.



"Of course not Leonard, you're an important aspect of the experiment being conducted."  Sheldon responded, before Leonard spanked him again - harder.



"Right now, you're going to call me sir."  Leonard said as he began to rub some lube over his cock, not stopping until their was a glistening sheen over the whole of it.



Moan.  "Yessir" Sheldon responded.  Penny laughed inwardly over how quickly Sheldon's scale of dominance had changed.



"Good.  Now, I'm going to fuck you - are you ready?"



"..."  Sheldon hesitated, receiving another 4 spankings.  "Yessir!"  With this affirmation, Leonard finally plunged into Sheldon.  The process was slow at first, having to slow down to let Sheldon's body accommodate the intrusion, but soon Leonard had a steady (albeit slow) rhythm going.



Meanwhile, Penny had taken advantage of her boys finally paying attention to each other and not to her.  She was able to regain control of her limbs and was able to wobble her way to the kitchen for some water.  When she got back, she could see that any pretenses of being gentle had gone out the window - they were rutting like animals.  Leonard was being extremely rough, if not downright feral;  Sheldon on the other hand was moaning and gasping, not to mention his arms looked like they couldn't support his weight for much longer.



'This has real potential', Penny thought contentedly.  She walked back over to the bed and whispered into Leonard's ear, making him chuckle as he slowed down to a stop and then lifted Sheldon's body until his back was touching Leonard's chest - never pulling out.  She  then climbed onto the bed and got on her knees in front of Sheldon, guiding his cock into her pussy and then signaling for Leonard to continue thrusting.



The pace he chose was only slightly slower than the rapid pace he had used before, but it was much more powerful.  Sheldon was lost in a world of pleasure (and some pain that his body was interpreting as pleasure), Penny's pretty pussy that he had used to control her earlier was now controlling him.  Despite the exhaustion he was starting to experience, between the feeling of his dick being wrapped in her tight honey pot and Leonard's power over the fulcrum of his body, he couldn't stop even if he wanted to.



"So tell us, Sheldon,"  Leonard asked with a firm voice as he continue to slam into the good doctor, "You've had a taste of the fruit on both sides of the fence, and now you're experiencing both at the same time.  Would you say you like women?  Men?  What say you, Dr. Cooper?"  Here he spanked Sheldon again, enjoying the contrast the red made on such pale skin. "As your roommate fucks your ass while you fuck the neighbor girl, what say you NOW!?"  He increased the pace of his thrusting as he waited for a response.



"Sir, I'm... I'm like an object that has been stretched or bent beyond the boundaries of its flexibility or elasticity."  Sheldon panted out, clearly overwhelmed and bordering on frantic.



"What?"  Penny asked as she looked over her shoulder to look at Leonard, hoping for an explanation.



The look in his eyes took her breath away.  Despite his glasses being off, she had never seen his eyes more focused, so intent.  The predatory gleam in his eyes was unmistakable as he answered her, his voice low and strong, "He's going to break."



As if that was the cue, Sheldon stiffened as his second (and more powerful) orgasm hit him.  With one hand on Penny's hips and the other on her neck, he thrust frantically a few times as he came.



Penny was moaning as he began to pump her full of cum, "That's good sweetie, fill me up.  It's okay."  She shook a few times when it seemed as if Sheldon wouldn't stop flooding her womb, climaxing silently.



When Sheldon stopped and collapsed, Leonard pulled out and yanked himself to completion - some of his cum landing on the stark red of Sheldon's ass, and some ending up in Penny's hair (although he wouldn't be the one to tell her).

For a moment, time seemed to stop.  Everything was right, everything was good.  There were no worries about a failing career as an actress, no insecurities about the validity of theoretical research, no worries of why particles were behaving as if they didn't have mass.



Absently, Sheldon thought about the feelings he was still experiencing. 'Amazing, the pleasure is coursing through me like a wa...'



"LIKE A WAVE!  I can't consider the electrons as particles, they move through the graphine as a wave!"

__________

Author's Note:  Written over Thanksgiving for a special friend.