Scars

SCARS

Nick was in a dead sleep when something woke him. He opened his eyes and reached for his partner. When he felt nothing there he awoke completely and sat up. He glanced around the bedroom but his partner was nowhere to be seen. He threw back the covers and walked out to the living room. He saw a hunched figure sitting in the shadows.
“Greg?” he called.
“Didn’t mean to wake you,” Greg said staring straight ahead. Nick went to the couch and sat down beside his partner.
“What’s wrong?” he asked. Greg shook his head.
“I’m fine Nicky,” he said. “Go back to bed.” Nick reached up and turned Greg’s face so he could see him. There were two tears falling from his partner’s eyes.
“Greg,” Nick said gently, cupping Greg’s face.” Greg sighed.
“I can’t get her face out my mind, Nicky,” he said. Nick slid his arm around Greg and pulled him against his chest. He didn’t even need to ask who Greg was talking about. Even if Tara Matthews’ case hadn’t been tied to the one he’d been working, he’d have heard about her. The whole lab was talking about her.
“God, Nicky,” Greg said crying into Nick’s chest. “I expected her to be dead when I got to the hospital. The way Grissom described her, I never thought she’d still be alive.” Nick shook his head. It was just like Grissom to not think about how seeing a victim with such extensive burns might affect Greg. God, he was callous.
“I saw them amputate her fingers,” Greg said nearly choking now. “All I could think was, I would rather be dead than like that.” Nick squeezed him hard.
“It could have been me Nick,” Greg whimpered. “If I hadn’t turned away from the blast…”
“But you did,” Nick said. “You’re alive Greg.”
“Alive, but scarred for life,” Greg said bitterly. Nick sighed. He knew how Greg felt about the scars on his back. He’d done everything he could to keep Nick from seeing them when he’d come home from the hospital. He’d had to let him eventually because he’d needed help changing his bandages. Once he’d no longer needed Nick to do that the scars became the elephant on the kitchen table. They knew they were there but they never talked about them. Greg did all he could to keep Nick from seeing them. He was always dressed before Nick, showered before Nick, and when they made love it was never in a position where Nick could see Greg’s back. Nick had seen them a few times, by accident. Greg never made a big thing about it, just quickly pulled a shirt on and went about what he was doing.
“Greg,” Nick whispered. “Take off your shirt.” Greg pulled away from Nick as though he’d been punched.
“Nicky,” he said eyes wide and voice panicked. “what…no…”
“Please Greggo,” Nick said. He reached for the hem of Greg’s shirt but Greg grabbed his wrists.
“No,” he said frantically shaking his head. “Nicky please don’t.”
“Greg listen to me,” Nick said cupping his partner’s face. “I love you. I’m in love with you. And nothing, nothing, will ever change that. I know you think your scars make you ugly. But I see them and they remind me how close I came to losing you, and how lucky I am that I didn’t. I don’t think I could go on if I lost you Greggo.”
“Oh, Nicky,” Greg whispered. Nick pulled him close and kissed him. When they pulled apart Greg looked at Nick nervously. With trembling hands he lifted his shirt over his head and tossed it aside. Then, slowly, he turned until he was facing away from Nick. Greg let out a small gasp as he felt Nick touch the raw skin. Nick’s touch was light but Greg’s skin burned under his fingers.
“Nicky,” he moaned as he felt Nick’s lips against his neck. His jeans got tight as Nick kissed his way from Greg’s neck to his shoulder.
“Bed,” Nick whispered in his ear. Greg nodded and stood up, reaching for his shirt. Nick snatched it away.
“You won’t be needing it,” Nick said pulling Greg close. Greg groaned as he felt Nick’s cock rub against him. His partner was as hard as he was. They went into the bedroom and Greg stretched out on his back. Nick lay down beside him and slowly slid Greg’s jeans and boxers off. Greg grabbed Nicks collar and pulled him down for a deep searing kiss before yanking Nick’s T-shirt over his head. Nick slid his arm under Greg’s head and leaned down to kiss him. As their tongued danced with each other Nick’s hands were roaming all over Greg’s body. Greg slid his hands into the waistband of Nick’s boxers and gave Nick’s perfect ass a squeeze. Nick lifted his head and looked deep into Greg’s eyes.
“Turn over,” he said gently. Greg’s heart suddenly raced. No, this is what he’d been avoiding for so long. He didn’t want Nicky to see. Not while they were making love. No.
“Greg, please,” Nick said so gently that Greg found himself slowly rolling onto his stomach. He buried his face in the pillows. For a moment nothing happened. For a moment he thought his worst fears had come true and Nick was disgusted by the grotesque mass that his back had become. Then he felt it. Nick was kissing his scars. So gently it made tears come to Greg’s eyes.
“You are so beautiful, baby,” Nick whispered in his ear. He felt Nick shift and heard him opening the bedside drawer. He groaned as he felt Nick slide two lubed fingers inside him, stretching him, preparing him. His cock was as hard as a rock and his whole body burned with need for his partner.
“Nicky,” he moaned. “Oh God Nicky. I need you so bad.” He groaned in protest as he felt Nick’s fingers leave him, but gasped in pleasure as he felt Nick slide into him. Nick slid his arm around Greg’s waist and lifted him so that Greg was on his hands and knees.
“Oh God Nick,” Greg cried. Both men groaned as Nick started to move inside Greg pouring out all the love and desire he felt for the man beneath him. Nick reached around Greg and wrapped his hand around his cock jerking him off in time with his own thrusts.
“Oh God, baby,” Nick cried. “Love you so much.”
“Love you Nicky,” Greg cried. “So close. Oh God Nicky…”
“Let go baby,” Nick cried. Greg screamed as he came all over Nick’s hand. Nick pulled Greg against him so his back was against his chest and he thrust into Greg.
”Oh God Greg,” Nick cried as he came. They collapsed, both entirely spent. When they had enough strength to move Greg shifted onto his side with his back against Nick’s chest.
“Thank you,” Greg said tears filling his eyes.
“I love you Greg,” Nick said holding him tight.
“I love you Nick.” They snuggled together and let sleep overtake them.