Recovering

House sighed, as he rolled around in his uncomfortable hospital cot; the day had been long and boring as he had had nothing to do but twiddle his thumbs. Chase had been taken in and out for more tests so even that distraction had disappeared. And now it was late at night and he was supposed to be asleep but he was feeling restless and the goddamn mattress was like a rock.

Frustrated he rolled onto his other side, then tried stretching out and laying on his back, but nothing seemed to appease him. Finally he sat up and started to count the tiles on the ceiling out of boredom, he never thought that people actually got bored enough to count tiles and yet here he was.

He was nearing 68 when a quiet moan came from across the room almost making him loose his place; the nerve. Just in case he waited to see if another sound would follow but the room fell silent and House resumed his count. Somewhere around 200, just as he thought he was going to burst from boredom, a loud cry interrupted his thoughts. He looked over and saw that Chase was thrashing around wildly in his bed, kicking and pushing against invisible attackers. Apparently whatever his fellow was dreaming it was rather violent, Chase through himself from one end of the bed to the other, at times teetering precariously on the edge and then curling up into the center till another fit of action hit.

House rolled his eyes to himself and decided Cuddy would have his ass if he let Chase tare his stitches. Clumsily, he reached for his cane and slid his feet onto the floor; as he neared Chase he saw that the young doctor's face was scrunched up in pain and that there were tear tracks on his cheeks. House cursed quietly as Chase resumed tossing and turning.

Carefully, he reached out and touched the other man's shoulder, "Chase," he said gruffly, "come on, wake up."

But apparently touch did not mix well with Chase at the moment, as soon as he felt House's hand on his shoulder he began to plead, still caught up in his visions, "please, no more, please!" The voice was so fragile and broken that House had to push down those annoying caring feelings; they were back in the real world now and he had a reputation to uphold.

He removed his hand and instead raised his voice. "Chase wake up," he demanded and kept talking loudly until the sleeping man awoke with a start. Chase slowly sat up and looked bewildered for a moment or two before the pain entered his eyes and reality started to register.He hugged his knees to his chest and House sat down at the edge of the bed.

"You were dreaming," he said unnecessarily.

"I know," Chase replied, finally looking up at House, who could now clearly see the eyes shining with unshed tears. "Thanks for uhh... waking me up... I guess..."

"Yea," House responded curtly but made no move to return to his own bed.

Chase looked at him silently for a moment and then averted his eyes to stare blankly into the room, focusing on nothing in particular. He flinched and forced himself to focus as he felt an arm shoving him over.

"I said, move over will you," House said in mock irritation, "weren't you listening."

"Move over?" Chase questioned, "why?"

"Because," House answered as though it were the most obvious thing in the world, "I'm tired and my leg hurts, and if I go all the way back over to that side of the room and do by some miracle manage to fall asleep, I will just have to get up again the next time you start throwing a fit, and I'm lazy. So move over, come on."

Slightly stunned Chase complied but the cot was too small either way. Grumbling slightly, House crossed the room and wheeled his bed over and pushed it right up against Chase's, "so I don't have to move at all," He said by way of explanation, "and so that when you do start thrashing around you don't fall of the edge of your bed, and crack your skull on the floor. Cause then everyone will blame me, and I just could not deal with everybody hating me," House added sarcastically. Then he laid down in the bed and pulled up the covers trying once again to find a comfortable position, he stopped fidgeting and looked up at Chase who was still sitting up and staring into nothing.

"Come on, time to sleep again, its dark outside you can sit and stare when the sun comes back up," House told his fellow.

Chase turned and looked at him and there was fear and pain in his eyes. "No," he replied, "I'm fine."

"Chase," the other man admonished, "you have to sleep sometime."

Chase shook his head furiously, "I can't, every time I close my eyes I...."

House rolled his eyes to himself, why was everyone so determined to turn him into a physiologist. He could ignore Chase, just turn around go to sleep, let him deal with his own problems. If it was anyone else, he probably would have, but he owed Chase at least a little. So instead he sat up slightly and said, "they can't get you anymore, you're safe now."

"They got in before," Chase pointed out quietly, "right around this time, into a room not too different."

"Security has been beefed up a lot; can you imagine the party the media would have with this? The last thing the hospital needs is a repeat." Chase shrugged at that and House continued, "besides, imagine if they ran into a pissed off Cuddy! They wouldn't know what hit them." A smile ghosted on Chase's lips then disappeared.

The blonde slowly lowered himself into a lying position, and groaned sightly as his body protested any further movement. House rolled over to face the wall and Chase was left staring at his back.

"House," he said tentatively. A grunt came from the other man. "Never mind." He saw House shrug and sighed, restlessly turning over to face opposite the older man. Somewhat comforted by the other body beside him, he soon slipped into a fitful sleep, nightmares pervading the peace. He knew he was asleep but he couldn't wake up, and everything seemed so real. It was like he was in two worlds, the physical and the mental. Chase felt his body start to flail around in reality but he was trapped in his mind. Blurry images of events mixed with dreamlike monstrosity flitted through, and flashbacks that progressed beyond what had occurred in that room assailed his mind. He felt the panic setting in, and all of a sudden from amidst the chaos he felt a hand wrap around him and the images skidded to a halt. Anchored by the physical touch he wrenched himself from the dream world and forced himself to open his eyes. House was still asleep but his arm was wrapped firmly around Chase. Chase tried to untangle himself but he found himself being held tightly, so as carefully as he could he moved to a comfortable position and soon fell into a dreamless sleep.

Hours later, sunlight filtered through the windows, and House blinked his eyes open only to be met with the sight of a very smug looking Cuddy tucking a phone into her pocket.

"You are making this blackmail too easy," She said teasingly. House looked a her as if she were insane, before the last remnants of sleep cleared out of his brain, and he realized the position he had woken up in. Sometime during the night he must have rolled over and Chase must have moved back, because the blonde was now curled up against his chest, blonde hair mussed everywhere obscuring his face, still fast asleep.

"Fine you got us, we were trying to make your fantasy come to life, now you owe us. Why don't you hop in bed with Cameron and we'll call it even," he leered at her. But Cuddy kept looking at him with that unnerving grin on her face which if anything seemed to grow bigger. "Its good to know you haven't had a crisis induced personality change House. But if I were you I would move in a hurry; I'm sure Cameron and Foreman will be along soon, and I don't think Cameron could handle the heartbreak." House sat up in a hurry at that, that would be the last thing they needed; a Mrs. Fix it Cameron on the case.

'Wait they?' When did he start thinking in they? He mentally shook himself and corrected. HE this would be the last thing he needed, especially after being shot and held hostage; Cameron's broken alert would be on higher then the terror alert in Iraq. He could only imagine what she would do if she found him in bed with Chase. So he bent down and yelled in Chase's ear, in a loud cheery voice "GOOD MORNING," then watched amusedly as his duckling jumped at least 5 feet, before landing on the bed and glaring at House.

"You could have just waited until I woke up" He muttered sleepily.

"Oh but what fun would that be for me?" House made his puppy face at Chase, and the latter stopped glaring and sighed.

"Yea we wouldn't want a bored you, who knows where that could lead."

"You mean it could lead farther then being in bed together?" House asked 'innocently' and watched as Chase turned pink for the millionth time in the past 48 hours. Smirking a little, he turned and grabbed his cane from where he left it. "Come on, get up I'm a cripple; help me push the beds apart." Chase untangled himself from the covers regretfully, but obediently rose and helped House to return one of the beds to where it had originally been the night before.

They had both just setteled into their respective beds when Wilson walked through the door. He made as if to sit down in the chair next to House's bed but House raised his hand to stop him. Instead he got up calling over to Chase, "if Cuddy comes in tell her I went for a walk and I promise to be a good boy and not hurt myself." Chase said something to the effect of "House you shouldn't," but the man was already out the doors Wilson trailing behind him, throwing an apologetic look to Chase and then disappearing out the doors.

"You know you really should be in bed." Wilson chastised as they walked along.

"Yes Mother," House answered in a mock high pitch voice

Wilson just shook his head, as House, as usual, ignored the concern. Instead he kept liming forward until he found an empty exam room.

"Here? Why of all places do you want to stop here? I have an office. YOU have an office; we could go there ins-"

"Can't; Cameron and Foreman are in my office waiting to pounce on little old me for information, and your office is the first place Cuddy will look. So here is exactly where we want to be," House replied as he eased into one of the chairs in the tiny room, and Wilson leaned against the wall. They sat their in silence for a little bit as Wilson looked expectantly at House waiting for the other man to say something.

"Well," Wilson said finally, "do you want me to guess, or are you going to tell me why you dragged yourself and me all the way here."

"You can guess," House replied flippantly.

"House," Wilson said half resignedly and half annoyed, "you dragged me out here to sit in this tiny room and stare at you. Now I know this isn't your preferred form of amusement, so why don't you just tell me what you would like to talk about, or let me go back to work." In truth Wilson had no intention of doing the latter; House was notorious for acting removed and unemotional but something like the attack had to have at least affected him slightly. As his best friend, and the only one who would talk to the other man, Wilson had to get him to admit that something was bothering him, or there would be negative consequences for everyone involved.

"Do you want to talk about the attack?" Wilson tentatively asked. This at least elicited a response from House who had been staring at the floor intently. The other man looked up and there was a shadow of something in his eyes that was quickly hidden away.

"No," he answered gruffly. "I don't want to talk about that. It happened, its over, I'm mostly in one piece; time to get back to normal."

"Okayy... then so what?" House looked away before speaking.

"I kissed Chase."

Wilson spluttered at that. Of all things he had been expecting to hear, and he wasn't sure exactly what those things had been, this idea had never crossed his mind.

"You... what... exactly?" He managed to say.

"I kissed Chase. I kissed Chase, and I liked it. How twisted is that?"

Wilson just stared for a moment, unsure how exactly to reply. "Your joking right?" He finally managed to utter weakly sinking into a chair next to House's.

"Yes, I left my bed, dragged you all the way into this tiny room just to tell you a really bad joke," The impatient reply came. "Now I'm going to tell you my favorite color is pink, and I love patients and world peace."

They sat quietly for another few moments until Wilson ventured another comment. "I didn't know you were gay..." he said quietly. "I think I would have noticed…"

House turned to face him, rubbing his hands frustratedly over his face. "I'm not," he said shortly.

"But you just said-" Wilson began to speak but was quickly cut off.

"I said I liked kissing Chase, not that I'm in love with all men that walk this earth. I know that makes you disappointed but you'll just have to survive somehow." House answered sarcastically.

Wilson as usual ignored the sarcasm and continued into the heart of the conversation. "So you liked kissing Chase, fine, so now what?"

House shrugged, "Now nothing. They made me kiss him, I doubt that holds very good memories for him, the last thing he needs right now is constant flashbacks. Besides we're back in the real world, not in some screwed up nightmare anymore. Everything is just going to go back to the way it was before."

Wilson narrowed his eyes at House as things began to come together In his mind. "You don't just like kissing Chase," he said slowly in a tone that suggested he scarcely believed the words himself, "you… you actually... like him."

House picked up his cane at that, got up and crossed the room slowly, finally stopping at the doorway, his back to Wilson. "Doesn't matter," he said emotionlessly before limping out into the hallway, leaving Wilson still sitting stunned on the chair.

After a moment or two Wilson decided he should probably follow House and get him to try and talk. How did he always end up in this situation? Sighing a little to himself, he began to make his way to House's hospital room where he assumed House had gone back to. When he entered the room however, he found no trace of the other man.

"Where's House?" a voice came from his right. He turned and saw Chase sitting in his bed looking decidedly bored.

"Oh, you know, he's House. We were talking then he suddenly just walked away. Nothing new; he'll turn up eventually," Wilson answered, carefully trying to keep his voice light.

"Oh," Chase answered, considering his next words. "Is he... is he upset at all by... by what happened?"

Wilson sighed and sat down in the chair next to the younger man's bed before looking Chase in the eye; he answered truthfully. "He's confused, I think and he feels like he needs to maintain his reputation. I honestly don't think hes even going to talk to me. Hes not very good with dealing with these type of situations, he'll disappear for a while then come back and never mention it again." He paused for a minute then continued, "maybe... maybe you could talk to him, since you were there. Maybe he'd say something, We can't just let him brood.

Chase laughed humorlessly at that, "I'm probably the last person he wants to talk to right now."

Wilson looked him straight in the eye, "you'd be surprised..." With that he got up and left the blonde with his thoughts.

A few hours passed and eventually just as Wilson had predicted House came limping back into the room. He said nothing to Chase as he swept into the room and went to lounge on his bed, completely ignoring the other mans presence. Chase sighed; House never made anything easy, but he had already decided he would attempt to try and talk to the older man, even though the thought of reliving those hours in the clinic made his heart skip a beat. As the silence began to press down on them, Chase finally spoke out.

"House..." he said, his voice slightly hesitant.

House pretended not to hear him for a few moments before turning his head to Chase as if it were some big burden to do so, and the blonde almost lost his resolve.

"Wilson stopped by earlier and well... anyway if you... if you need to talk about," he swallowed dryly as his mouth had suddenly gone very dry, "about what happened, I'm well, I'm here." He finished his voice barely above a whisper. He seemed to be steeling himself for the worst. For a split second he thought he saw a strange softness in House's eyes but just as quickly the eyes hardened.

House appraised the man across from him for an instant, for some strange reason he felt an overwhelming desire to confide in his duckling. But years of practice kicked in and instinct took over.

"Aww how sweet of you, your here for me." He said his voice biting, "Going to try and make me feel all better? Like you did with Derrick?" Chase stiffened at the name and snapped almost pleadingly, "House stop."

But House was already angry and confused, and even more angry that he was confused, so he was pouring all of his frustrations out and couldn't stop. "Going to get on your knees like a good catholic boy and use that pretty mouth of yours?" Chase's gasp confirmed that he had gone to far, as he tore his gaze away from the spot on the wall he had been staring, he found the younger man collapsed on a heap on the floor. The green eyes were blank and he seemed to be seeing something which only existed for him. House cursed; great he had managed to push Chase into a flashback, and there was no telling how long it would last. Still swearing under his breath, House got up and moved across the room and sat on the floor next to Chase. There was nothing he could do but wait until the memory ended and Chase came back to reality. On reflection he probably should have used different words, but he had been annoyed and aiming to hurt. It hadn't been the smartest thing to do, but what was done was done. He'd do his best to repair the damage when Chase came too, that is if Chase would talk to him.

10 minutes passed and suddenly the blondes eyes were focused again and filled with immediate pain. Chase shook his head slightly, turned his head to find House sitting beside him the wordlessly got up and crossed the room in an instant and went out through the doors. "Well," House decided, "that could have gone worse," and now he decided he should probably go hunt down his duckling.

After searching through just about every room in the hospital in an attempt to chase Chase down, House finally pushed the door open to the roof to find the blonde leaning against the wall, eyes closed against the bright sunlight. As House approached, he opened one eye and then shut it again. "House just leave me alone, ok? I'm not in the mood."

Ignoring this House limped over and lowered himself to the ground next to Chase, squinting against the bright sun. "I didnt mean for that to happen."

"I know, but it happened and you weren't the one who had to relive... that... again." Chase said tiredly.

House was silent for a minute. "You were right, I do sort of want to talk, but its just not me, you know." Chase nodded silently and House continued, "I blew up because I was annoyed." He considered saying he was sorry, but he could never seem to do that. It seemed to be what Chase wanted to hear though; instead House leaned over and kissed the other man softly on the lips, "and I think I like you." Without waiting for a reaction he got up and limped away, only stopping to sign his discharge papers and leave the hospital behind him.

As soon as he had the hospital in his rear view mirror he stopped to process what had happened. He shook his head as if to clear it and put aside all the thoughts that threatened to flood his mind. Since when did he care what any one thought? He prided himself on being so far removed, so why was he, of all people, acting like a teenager with a crush? Maybe Cuddy really had messed with his brain when he had been knocked out. He had thought the best solution would be to simply shove away the feelings; to ignore them and push them out. But then he had impulsively kissed Chase, and it seemed to late to pretend he felt nothing now. Now that it was out of the open. He frustratedly drummed his fingers against the wheel of his car, this was exactly why he never let his guard down, letting things out just gave people more weapons to hurt you with, and cause more and more issues that he just didn't want to deal with. Chase would probably tell someone now and damn did he not want anyone interfering in his business. For now he would just run away from dealing with the problems and go drown in takeout and bad TV.

He unlocked the door to his apartment and stepped in ignoring the constant beep of his answering machine. Suddenly exhausted he collapsed onto his sofa and turned on his tv. Within moments he was fast asleep, when he woke up he realized that the sun had set and the sky was dark and as he blinked himself back into focus he heard a repetitive knocking sound at his door. Groaning he decided to ignore it hoping it went away. The sound continued for a while then paused for a moment.

"House?" Chase's voice called from across the door. House glanced up but made no move towards the entrance into his home. "House," he heard again. "Fine don't answer but we need to talk."

House waited another ten minutes before opening the door to his apartment, and when he did he found an exhausted looking Chase leaning against the wall half asleep.

"Come on," he called to the man on the floor, "you can sleep on the couch." Silently Chase followed and within moments of lying down he was fast asleep, House supposed after barely sleeping the past few days Chase just needed to pass out. Apparently they were going to talk when he got up, and god knows how that would turn out.

Eventually after a lot of tossing and turning and sharp pains courtesy of his knee House managed to fall asleep.When he finally woke up the smell of french toast filled his nostrils, and the clanging of plates could be heard from the kitchen. With a little difficulty he got out of his bed and limped out to the kitchen were Chase was sitting. "French toast? are we back in third grade?" House sarcastically asked.

Chase just shrugged in response, "if you don't want it, don't eat it."

"you're no fun in the morning." House fake scowled and grabbed some of the food.

"So you yesterday you sai-." Chase began but was cut off by House before he could finish,"you shouldn't talk with your mouth full, its rude."

"House." Chase said in a frustrated voice, "You come and find me, kiss me, tell me you like me and now you don't want to talk about it?"

"yep" came the cheery response which caused Chase to groan. "Fine I'll just go."

"Ohh and here I thought we were going to have a heart to heart, paint each others toenails and put little braids in our hair. How mean of you to get my hopes up like that."

"House we can't just leave things they way they are," Chase retorted.

"Why not? I'm fine with it. If you have a problem well thats your problem," House answered.

"Your obviously not fine with the way things are or you wouldn't have kissed me." Chase threw back

"Why do you insist on throwing that in my face."

"Why do you insist on ignoring it?"

By now both of them had gotten up and were standing face to face, Chase was almost yelling, and the tension in the room was thick. House ran through his options briefly in his mind before just doing whatever it was he felt like as always. At this moment that involved balancing himself precariously on his bad leg and pinning Chase to the wall before roughly kissing him. As the kiss continued House wondered by he had resisted this for so long, reveling in the sensation of the soft lips against his own. For a minute everything was perfect and then he felt hands on his waist pushing him away and Chase grow rigid underneath him. Taking that a sign he should stop he reluctantly backed away and let Chase, who was gasping for air, catch his breath. The green eyes were clenched shut, a pained expression on his face.

House silently cursed Derrick and the other bozo before saying, "I promise I wont deny that one." This comment was met with a satisfactory glare, good he needed to keep Chase focused on him not...on that night. He was surprised at how steady Chase's voice was when the blonde spoke.

"What are you doing House and don't tell me you aren't doing anything because this is the second damn time you've kissed me in the last 24 hours and I cannot deal with you messing with me right now. So either you want something or you don't but you have got to make up your mind."

"What does it look like I'm doing, I'm kissing you, god are you that blonde that you cant even tell when I kiss you?" Chase just shook his head, House sighed. "Ok, ok fine; I don't know what I want, ok? I'm not gay and yet I keep having this strange urge to kiss you; weird I know."

"So..."

"So nothing, I'm not suddenly going to become some fluffy soft hearted romantic and woo you until you fall madly in love. I'm telling you straight what I feel, ball's in your court now."

"What would you like me to say?" Chase sighed sinking into one of House's chairs, "We can't leave it like this not if we're going to work together again. But after everything I'm not sure a relationship with you is what I need right now. I mean your driving me insane already and we arent even dating yet." Chase ran his hands through his hair messing it up slightly, "I dunno, we could hang out or something just for fun; like you do with Wilson and see where it goes. I don't know how I feel about anything right now and I can't just rush into something because you've decided you want it."

"Fine," House answered, "Lets watch TV, thats fun. My soap is coming on." Chase shrugged and got up and sat on the couch next to House who flipped on the TV. They watched in silence for a while until House yawned loudly and stretched outrageously, purposely making a show of doing so. As he brought his arms down he slung one of them around Chase's shoulder and pulled him closer. Chase tensed slightly then rolled his eyes though his face was smiling. House turned to look at him, "What?"

"Nothing." Chase answered and leaned a little more into House finding the warmth of the man next to him comforting. He felt Houses arm tighten slightly around him as the other man resumed watching his show feigning disinterest. Together they sat through another several episodes, neither man really wanting to move and disturb their current peace.