Love is Suicide

A/N: Right, so this is like my first slashfic ever - please be nice to me, or i'll probably cry. constructive criticism is welcomed though, i have indeed tried my best ^_^ Also, i'm aware that this is really not like the actual boosh, i think angst and the actual boosh style wouldn't work together...

Admissions and insecurities
POV: Vince
I sigh. It is the fifth time today I’ve caught myself staring, and if I could go by previous experience, I would do it at least another five times today too, meaning that I find myself staring at Howard ten times a day – which equals seventy times a week.
I mentally shake myself, realising I’m staring… again.

I look away, wishing I was confident enough to talk to Howard more rather than just spazzing out all the time. Sure, we talk, but it’s only ever about fashion and hair, or petty arguments about jazz and electro – never anything deeper.

I sigh again. I love Howard so much… Everything about him, from his soft wavy hair, his endearing but – slightly outdated – fashion sense, right down to his sweet, sensitive personality that no one else seems to pick up on. But I could never tell him, I think, he’d only reject me… I’m too imperfect for him.
“What are you thinking?” says a soft voice suddenly, making me jump. I blink and look up at the owner of the voice, momentarily confused, but then the mask of humour is back on my face.

“What’s up, small eyes? Oh, you know me, I don’t need to think, I got little people in my head to do it all for me…”
Howard looks momentarily offended at being called ‘small eyes’ which I immediately feel bad for… but then he smiles. “Er, listen, I came to tell you something… or ask… or tell… whichever.” I nod, my heart thumping.

“Well, I’ve noticed you’ve been sort of… staring at me a lot lately and… well… I don’t really know how to put this without making things really awkward if I’m wrong, but… do you have feelings for me?” I open my mouth to speak but he interrupts me. “Wait, before you say anything, I can’t wait any longer… I need to tell you that… I’m in love with you.’ He blurts in a rush, going red in the typical Howard Moon style. I just sit there, my thoughts racing. Howard must misinterpret my facial expression, because he looks crestfallen and turns to go, “oh… well, I’m off out with Lester, little man… see you later.” As he turns away, my mind starts working again and I say “No! Don’t go.”

Howard turns back, his expression hopeful. I look up at him, look into his eyes, and see my own blue orbs reflected there, brimming with happiness. “I never thought you’d feel the same way about me as I do about you… I love you too, I have done for ages now… when I see you it’s like all these people in my head taking me over.” I sit for a minute, collecting my thoughts. “And I’m just so jealous of you, too, Howard… you may not seem to get the girls, but you’re so secure, so confident in yourself and it’s amazing, you’re amazing…”

I finish my mini rant and look away, and then look back up at Howard. Howard smiles gently at me, then sits down beside me, leans forward and kisses me softly on the lips, taking me by surprise. In an instinctive response I kiss back and deepen the kiss, but then pull away, feeling a sudden impulse to make Howard understand me further.
“Howard, have you ever wondered why I wear such loud, eye catching outfits?” Howard nods, looking confused. “well – and I don’t know why I’m telling you this but – It’s because I’m so insecure with myself… when I look in the mirror and see a million and three imperfections, and feel I have to cover them up with outrageous – albeit awe inspiring – outfits.” Howard nods, seemingly understanding my apparent need to stand out all the time.

He looks into my eyes. “Oh, Vince, you don’t need to feel like that. To me you’re absolutely perfect and no one else matters!”
He kisses me again… then deepens the kiss. I can feel Howard’s tongue probing my lips, seeking entry into my mouth and I open it. The tentative contact of our tongues sends waves through me and I groan in pleasure, pressing into Howard. Howard responds, making the kiss rougher, more urgent, faster paced.

Oh God… I can’t take any more! I think, and while still maintaining contact, I begin to undress myself and Howard, enjoying immensely the feel of skin on skin. Howard takes off his lucky saxophone underwear, if it was any other circumstances I would have laughed at him but I’m breathtaken. He helps me take off my silver sequinned electro underwear. Suddenly the kiss is mutually broken as we both stop to take in the sight of each other.

I stare at Howard’s large erection, immediately worrying about my own in comparison – but then Howard takes me into his mouth. “Ohhhh…. Howard!” I gasp.
Howard begins to move up and down along the length of my erection, stroking and cupping my balls at the same time. I begin to moan as I feel pressure building and start to thrust faster into Howard’s mouth. “A-ah… Howard…. I’m gonna come…” Howard quickly takes his mouth from around my penis and I feel indescribable frustration.

Howard smiles playfully and says “can’t have you coming when we’ve only just started, can we?” He then proceeds to push me down on all fours. “Stay there.” He instructs, then leaves the room. I stay on my hands and knees, wondering what Howard has gone to get, until Howard comes back in holding a bottle of lube.

I stare at it in bewilderment. “Where the hell did you get that from? And what were you planning to use it for??” Howard smiles again and simply says, “Well, I was saving it for a rainy day. And it’s raining today, so…” he squeezes some lube out of the bottle, and I suddenly feel warm fingers around my hole, lubricating it, then probing in with his index finger… then two fingers… then three. I grunt in pain mixed with pleasure, but soon get used to the feeling. Howard takes his fingers out and positions his hard erection at my hole. He enters a little at a time as I moan in pain at first but it quickly turns to indescribable pleasure. How can something that feels this great hurt so much? I think.

Howard begins to move in and out inside of me, moaning as he does so. His moans of pleasure only serve to turn me on even more, and I begin to meet his thrusts and as the pressure builds, I moan louder and louder in unison with Howard.
Suddenly Howard reaches round and grabs hold of my hard erection, and begins to move his hand up and down my length, in time with the thrusts.
“Vince” he chokes. “Agh, Vince, I’m gonna come!” I manage to whimper out a strangled “m-me too…” before we both come simultaneously. I feel Howard’s hot come spilling inside me, as I come into his hands. We lie, shuddering and moaning for a time, riding the last waves of the most intense orgasm both have ever experienced, then relax.
The last words I hear before slipping into sleep, naked, sticky and happy with Howard still inside me, are, “I love you, Vince…”

A/N: so you like? if you like, please tell me and i shall update more as soon as i can! if you don't like it/don't tell me you like it, then i'll just keep it to myself hehe.