Far Away

This is a work of fanfiction based on the tv shows CSI and CSI New York. The main characters are Sydney Hammerback and James Brass. I really like writing the unusual pairings, I admit it. Not that I don’t love the more popular pairings, but because so many wonderful writers have already written about the more common pairings, and I don’t feel like I can do any better then they’ve already done. I thought this pairing would be interesting. I like Sydney; there isn’t enough about him, just in general. I don’t own the characters and universe for these shows, nor do I make money off of them. I only things I own are my imagination and the wacky and wonderful world therein.

Far Away
Dr. Sydney Hammerback was perched, cross-legged, on one of the metal examination tables, in autopsy typing busily way on his laptop when Stella found him.
“Writing reports?”
She asked walking to stand next to him leaning on the examination table.
“Nope, although that would be the responsible thing to do.”
Sid grinned at her from over the tops of his glasses. Stella grinned back and glanced over his shoulder at the screen, which showed an open internet browser.
“Writing an e-mail to the boyfriend then?”
Sydney nodded and continued typing, his long fingers flying over the keys. Stella shrugged.
“Ok by me. Just don’t let Mac catch you working on personal stuff during shift.”
Sid made a face.
“I don’t see why he’d care, except for the fact he’s Mac. But still it’s not like autopsies particularly the happen’n place today, and I’ve already got all the information I’m going to get from ice pick to the forehead guy.”
Stella walked over to the autopsy table closest to where Sid sat and gazed down at the body lying there.
“So it was an ice pick?”
Sid nodded.
“Yeah or something very much like one.”
He shook his head.
“Why people just don’t stick to shooting each other I don’t know.”
He pressed send and closed his laptop, sighing slightly.
“You miss him.”
He glanced over at Stella who was watching him sympathetically.
“Yes, I do. Very much.”
“You have vacation time coming up. You should take it and fly out there. Spend some time together.”
“I’m planning on it”
Sid slid off the table and set his laptop down on his desk before joining Stella by the body.
“Only with my luck, all hell will breaking loose and they’ll decide the department just can’t cope without me. Then they’ll end up pushing my vacation time back. Again.”
Stella patted his shoulder consolingly.
“Why don’t you take your mind off the possibility and tell me about the body.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sid sighed as he entered his tiny apartment and slumped into the closest chair without bothering to remove his coat or shoes or tern on more then the overhead light. There were days when he truly hated his job. Most days he was o.k. with it. Sid actually really enjoyed working in autopsy. God knew he was over qualified for it, with degrees in forensic medical examination, forensic anthropology, and the culinary arts. He could have worked just about any where, doing just about anything and at one point or another he had. Working autopsy for a CSI team though allowed him to utilize multiple degrees and working autopsy for New York City CSI was at least never boring. However every once in a while there were days when he wondered what he was still doing working for the police instead of taking a nice quiet teaching job where he didn’t have to be standing up right on a concrete floor for ninety percent of a very long workday. Sid shook his head ruefully, thinking of him in teaching job was ridiculous of course. He’d be climbing the walls out of shire boredom within weeks.
He kicked off he’s shoes and tossed his coat across the couch before heading for the bathroom to take a shower. Right after he first took the coroner job, his, now second ex, then-wife had told him he always smelled like formaldehyde and death when he came home from work. Although he could never smell it himself, he still remained slightly self-conscious about the possibility. Not that there was anyone to care these days. He sighed slightly toweling off his hair, God he missed Jim, missed him so much it hurt sometimes. It wasn’t even as if they’d ever known what it would be like to actually live together. There relationship had always been, and would probably always be, a long distance one, but Sid seemed to feel it more and more these days.
Sid changed into jeans and a battered t-shirt before wandering into his kitchenette to see what he could put together for dinner. From in the living room his cellphone began trying to vibrate its way off the coffee table. Sid tore into the living room and grabbed it off the coffee table pretty sure he knew who was on the other end.
“Sydney.”
“hey babe. Tell me, it’s a good time, because I’ve had one hell of a day.”
Jim Brass’s incredibly deep and gravely voice spoke into his ear.
“no, no it’s a fine time.”
Sid assure him sitting down on the couch dinner momentarily forgotten.
“Actually any time you want to call’s a good time as long as I’m not actually in the middle of an autopsy.”
Across the line he heard Jim sigh.
“I always forget how different things are for you there in New York.”
Sid sighed quietly too, in sympathy. In Las Vegas Jim had to make sure he stayed in the closet for fear of loosing his job, while in New York by state law it would be illegal to fire Sid on the bases of his sexual orientation. The out come of which being while Jim had to be scrupulously careful never to be outted or talk about Sid, Sid could talk openly about his sexuality and Jim.
He got up and pored himself a glass of wine before sitting back down on the couch legs folded comfortable underneath him.
“Why don’t you tell me about your day, unless you don’t feel like talking about it, then we can talk about something else. What ever you want really.”
He could almost hear Jim smile
“I miss you, babe.”
Something in Sid’s chest contracted painfully
“I miss you too.”
They sat in silence for a few seconds.
“think I’m going to be getting vacation time soon.”
Sid told his lover, taking a sip of his wine.
“I thought I’d fly out to Las Vegas and see you.”
“that would be nice, but won’t your girls be upset you didn’t spend it with them?”
Sid snorted,
“Jim, one’s in college the other’s just started law school. They have friends and boyfriends to keep them company. Besides with all the time their mother spends with them, they’re probably over saturated with parental love, and care.”
He took a breath
“Furthermore even though I raised them and love them as my own I was only ever there step-father to begin with which makes my parental rights over them vague at best. Plus I’d rather cut off my own arm with a scalpel then run the risk of crossing paths with my ex and her newest boy toy.”
On the other end of the phone Jim laugh.
“God Sid, darlin’ I love you dearly, but you sure know how to pick them. Both of your exes are real pieces of work and I thought I got a bad deal on matrimonial bliss”
Sid rolled his eyes and made a face, partly because Jim was right and partly because he knew it wasn’t entirely his ex-wives fault. If he’d admitted to being gay earlier. . . and it wasn’t even like he’d ever been close-minded. . . It was just always, easier not to question he’s feelings. It would have made things more complicated then they already were. He sighed.
“hey, what’s on your mind?”
The deep gravely voice in his ear brought him back to the present, and he smiled, all be it, in tire way.
“Just thinking about when we first met.”
“Really? How romantic of you.”
He can practically hear Jim raised eyebrow and Sid laughs. God but the man made him just plain happy in a way his wives never did.
“You were one hell of a mess through.”
Jim’s voice had gotten serious again, and Sid lets out a breath softly.
“Yeah, yeah I was.”
They had met at a CSI conference. Stella and Flack had dragged him to it. It had been after his second divorce, after he had come out, which combined with his wife’s infidelities had pretty well been the final nail in the coffin of their marriage. It should have been a relief. He had been unbelievably happy after his first divorce and at least this time around he had been honest to her, his kids and himself about his sexuality, about who he really was. It should have been liberating, coming out of the closet. Especially when one had lived in said closet for almost forty years. Instead he had gotten horribly depressed and taken to drinking in a way he hadn’t since that big catering job had blown up in his face almost fifteen year earlier. The team had finally pretty much ganged up on him. Made sure he got to work everyday, forced him into looking for an apartment, talked him into seeing a shrink that specialized in issues surrounding coming out, and finally dragged him all the way to Washington D.C. for the national CSI conference. Stella had even threatened serious physical harm if he didn’t mingle with other forensic scientists at the conference, instead of hiding in his room the whole time.
He had thought the shear number of friendly people alone might kill him, and it was then that he had met Jim Brass, CSI Las Vegas. Captain Jim Brass, who looked as harassed as he felt, in a very, very sexy way.
The first time Sid had laid eyes on him, he thought he might pass out, the man was just that good looking and it had been a long, long time since he had let himself think of another man as desirable and attractive. Of course he had then gone out of his way to avoid Brass for the first few days of the conference. Actually the shire number of good-looking men with degrees in forensic science had been a little overwhelming anyway. He spent the whole first two days trying not to be attracted to some of the guys there Sid had in fact spent the afternoon before he met Jim trying to breathe slowly through his nose and concentrate on the fascinating things Dr. Gil Grissom was saying instead of concentrating only on the extremely cute way he pursed his lips and peered over his glasses every time some one asked a question.
“You were a mess, but you were also really easy on the eyes.”
Jim’s voice cuts into Sid’s thoughts, making him laugh.
“you remember that horrible dinner we all had to go to?”
Jim continued, obvious his mind had been going along the same path as Sid’s.
“Gil’d gotten off by pleading migraine and gone to hide in his room. But I just couldn’t seem to make it out of there without running into someone, and I finally just gave up on the idea of making it back to my room and went out to the balcony.”
“and the fact that we met on a balcony in the moon light is just too perfect to be believed”
Sid cuts in taking another sip of his wine, leaning back remembering. Jim laughs softly.
“yeah, but you were something else. I could tell right away that you weren’t doing too great with all the crowds and the fanfare, but God you carried it well.”
Jim hadn’t expected anyone else to be on the balcony when he had gone out there, just looking for a few minutes of peace and quiet, wondering how Gil had talked him into coming to the convention in the first place. He had certainly not expected to bump into the good-looking doctor from New York.
Jim had noticed Sid the first day of the convention. The other man was tall, elegant, with sweeping blond hair just starting to gray, and unbelievably intense blue eyes, he would have stood out just about anywhere. Jim had also realized early on that the other man was depressed or coming out of a bout of depression. It was all in the way he carried himself, the way he didn’t make eye contact and turned inwards whenever he thought no one was looking. He had also noticed the lack of a wedding ring and the sidelong way he looked at other men. Jim had always been open with himself about his sexuality, he was solidly bisexual and he was also very interested in the M.E. but the other man’s depression and manner screamed, bad break-up to him, so Jim had firmly squashed his interest.
When they had finally met face-to-face on the balcony Jim had first offered to leave, but Sid had declined and instead they had ended up talking. Hours later they had moved from the balcony to the hotel bar where they had continued to talk over drinks until the early morning. Over that one night Jim was sure they covered pretty much everything, from their life stories, their work, politics, art, movies, sports anything and everything they could think of. The more he learned about Dr. Sydney Hammerback the more attractive and desirable the other man became, until Jim realized this could really, really turn into a problem.
It was then as they sat across from each other, table cover in shot glasses, idly watching the sun come up, that Sid had finally worked up his nerve and lunged across the table and kissed Jim. Jim had returned the kiss enthusiastically and they had made it up to Sid room were they hadn’t had sex but simply fallen asleep curled together on the bed.
After they slept and sobered up, Jim had insisted they talk, “figure this thing out” as he had put it. Sid had admitted he didn’t know what he wanted, and when he had asked Jim, what Jim wanted the other man had looked straight at him then gently ran his thumb along the side of Sid’s face and answer simply “I want you.” Sid wasn’t sure what was supposed to have happened, how people usually met and got into a relationship, but for the rest of the conference he and Jim had been just about inseparable, although they hadn’t actually had sex until the last day of the conference. When Jim had left for Las Vegas he had given Sid his number and sworn he would call.
Sid hadn’t even been sure at first what they’d had or what they were likely to have, working on opposite sides of the country. So he had chocked it up as a one-time deal and tried to forget about it. Until Jim had started calling him, a lot, like every night. By the time Sid had flown out to Las Vegas the first time, they had begun referring to the other as their lover, and Sid couldn’t imagine having anyone else in his life.
“love you”
Sid broke the silence of their combined reverie.
“yeah I love you too.”
Jim’s voice sounded gruff and slightly strained.
“miss you, so much”
“what happened today?”
Sid asked sensing some of the tension in Jim’s voice wasn’t just from their separation.
“they let my damn suspect go”
Jim just about growled.
“said we didn’t have enough to stand up in court, which is bullshit, we had plenty, it’s just the higher-ups in the force are being pressured by the Mayor. Turns out he’s worried about the cities image.”
The sheer contempt in Jim’s voice spoke volumes about what he thought of the Mayor and his concern for the cities image. Sid could actually hear him grinding his teeth.
“easy, easy, there Captain Brass, you guys’ll get him”
Sid spoke with confidence and Jim let out his breath on the other end
“yeah I know, but you know how I hate politics. Especially when the get in the way of my job.”
He paused as if pulling himself together
“So what’s been up with you in NY?”
“not much”
Sid rubbed is neck
“one guy got an ice pick to the head. That’s about the most existing it’s been.”
“and you’re doing alright? Not working too hard?”
Sid laughed
“I should be the one asking you that. You know I don’t work harder then I absolutely have to.”
Jim let out a snort
“like hell you don’t.”
Sid smiled.
“Think I’m going to have Don over to dinner in a few days. He’s between girlfriends, and as been feeling kind of neglected since Lindsey and Danny have been spending so much time together.”
“and should I be getting jealous? If I remember correctly Flack’s a good looking guy.”
Jim didn’t sound too worried and Sid smile widened.
“hardly if Don was going to start playing on the other side of the fence I’m not really the one he’d be after.”
“why not? You’re funny, brilliant, sexy as hell.”
“and I have you. Which generally keeps me from even looking at other guys, and I really do think if Flack was bi Danny would be the first to know. Besides. . . ”
Sid stretched out his long legs in front of him to stop them from cramping.
“you’re pretty hot yourself, and I’ve seen the guys you work with. I still don’t understand why at least one of them hasn’t tried to jump you yet.”
“what makes you think they haven’t and I’ve told them I’m taken?”
Jim’s voice rumbles back.
“Which reminds me have I mentioned how much I miss you? The things I want to do to you. . .”
Sid groaned softly
“don’t Jim. Don’t start what you can’t finish.”
“you’re beautiful you know that?”
Jim’s voice is soft and getting progressively deeper, and Sid really, really had to get down to Las Vegas soon.
“God it’s a good thing we don’t work together, because I don’t think I could deal with knowing you’re down stairs in autopsy everyday. That thing you do with your glasses, when you’re explaining something, just makes me want to tackle you and have my wicked way with you right there in the middle of autopsy, and I really don’t think neither Mac nor Gil would appreciate that.”
Sid draws in a rather unsteady breathe and tries to think calming thoughts.
“God I hope you know what you’re doing to me.”
Across the line Jim laughs.
“nothing I can’t imagine or don’t want to be there to witness.”
His voice is none too steady either.
“I got another tatt you know, not telling you where, you’re just going to have to find that out yourself.”
“God, Jim don’t. . .”
“Don’t what Sid? Make you think of my body, or how much I need you, need you touching my body?”
This is absurd, part of Sid’s mind thinks, ridiculous how easily Jim terns him on. Yet the other part of his mind loves it, loves how much control Jim has over him.
“Jim. . . I need.”
“Yeah”
God it should be impossible to make one word sound that sexy, even in Jim’s voice.
“yeah need you too. Need you so much. Need to kiss you, need to hold you, need to touch you, need to fuck you so very much.”
Jim’s voice is so low it’s a growl now, the sound going straight to Sid’s groin.
“do you know what you do to me? Sid, sometimes all it takes is to think of you with that little self-satisfied smirk on your face, that well fucked look. Never needed someone the way I need you, babe.”
There’s a pause then Jim’s voice rough with arousal.
“are you touching yourself Sid? Are you sitting there listening to me stroking. . .”
No but I will be if you don’t stop, Sid thinks and then a picture of Jim in bed, half dressed, stroking himself through his boxers pops into his head, and he thinks he might come right there and then.
“are you?”
his voice is breathless and husky, Jim only groans long and low, and Sid struggles desperately to regain control over himself.
“Because if you are and I was there, I’d take your hand way and move up your body to kiss you hard, and long. Dip my tongue into your mouth and bite at your lower lip, just so, until you’re shaking with need and want, and still I won’t let you touch yourself.”
His breath is coming fast and hard, but he’s in control and Jim is making noises that are too good to make him want to stop.
“I’d run my hand up your belly, up your chest through your chest hair and kiss my way down your neck, across your chest. Kiss everyone of your scares, finally allow myself to lick one of your nipples.”
Jim actually cries out and now not only are Sid’s pants way too tight but they’re starting to feel damp.
“and you make those noises that just make me have to kiss you again and grind my hips into yours, and you want me so badly, I can feel how much you need me to touch you.”
“please”
Jim’s voice is half strangled
“Sid, I need you, I need you to touch me, God so badly.”
“I’d kiss my way down your body”
Sid’s voice is relentless, he’s so hard and he can tell Jim is so close. He opens his own pants and finally, finally touches himself. It almost sends him over the edge but he holds back and focus on the image of Jim in his mind, the sound of Jim’s labored breathing over the phone.
“have you taken your boxers off, Jimmy?”
There the sound of rustling and Jim lets out a small sound.
“I kiss my way to your inner thigh, making sure not to touch you, not yet, I want you just about begging before I suck you.”
Jim makes another strangled noise
“then I do, I take you in my mouth and you feel so good Jimmy, so fucking good, and you taste great, you always do. I suck you a couple times then lick the head of your cock and you’re so close, so close it’s not going to take much, not much at all. Then I’m deep-throating you, taking you all the way down”
Jim cries out a long, strangled, deep, growling sound and Sid lets his head fall back, working himself hard until he comes. He must have cried out too because Jim makes a low hissing noise, as if the image of Sid getting off on this just made it that much better. For a moment Sid just lies there, eyes closed listening to Jim’s ragged breathing. They don’t do this often but when they do Sid never ceases to be amazed at how hard Jim can make him come from so many states away.
“God, Sydney”
Jim’s voice is not even close to being steady yet.
“you should be fucking illegal. The way you talk.”
Sid sighs softly into the phone
“I’m definitely coming to Vegas as soon as I possibly can.”
“and I’ll be waiting at the airport”
Sid catches himself as his eyes start to drift shut.
“God I’m going to fall asleep on the couch and I haven’t even eaten dinner yet.”
Jim chuckles softly.
“why do you think I made it to bed? After the day I’ve had and then the workout you just gave me, no way in hell am I moving until my alarm goes off tomorrow.”
“ should get up and eat something”
Sid tries to clean himself up slightly then just does back up his pants, he’s going to have to take another shower and wash his clothes anyway.
“yeah you should, you’re too thin as it is”
Sid grins
“yes, mother.”
Jim snorts
“you must have had a really ugly mother”
“hey my little demonstration just now should have been enough to convince you, I in no way find you ugly, and let’s just keep my mother out of this.”
Sid pitches his voice mock severe and Jim laughs.
“love you Sid. I better get off the line before I fall asleep on you. Talk to you tomorrow.”
Sid nods
“love you too, take it easy at work”
“I’ll try”
Sid grins
“sleep well”
“yeah you too, and do that soon.”
The phone goes dead and Sid sits there for a few minutes before getting up. He showers then changes and finally moves slowly into his kitchenette. He’ll have to talk to Mac tomorrow, he thinks about getting that time off, and soon maybe very soon he’ll be seeing Jim in person. He smiles, and turns on the stove, humming softly to himself starts to cook dinner.