What Will Be - sequel to 'Didn't Have To Be'

Clark Kent slid down into the stiff, wooden chair. He stretched his arms up, high, over his head. The movement lifted his shirt up, slid it from the confines of his belt, and exposed toned, golden skin.

His arms moved down slowly, hands landing in a abundance of messy, black hair.

Lex Luthor watched as those large hands fisted, pulling that head back. Arching that neck in a way that left him shaking in the chilled room. He stared at the large screens...Clark from every angle possible. The film with not the quality he would have preferred, but the cameras had to be completely unobtrusive. He knew that Clark would notice any slight anomaly. Knew that one day he'd pay for yet another invasion of Clark Kent. And couldn't help but look,

People always underestimated Clark Kent. But, not Lex. Never.

Sharp gray-blue eyes closed tight as memories flooded Lex's mind. The smell of the blood in the operating room...the sounds of raw pain coming from a lush mouth. He shook his head.

He'd done this. He'd done this to himself.

And, Clark hadn't spoken to him in three years. There had been looks, to be sure. Across a room, eyes had met, and Clark had spun away every time. Angry, hurt, sad. He never saw hope any more.

And, for that, he could not find any semblance of peace. He hadn't thought it was possible for there to be a time when Clark Kent's huge, peridot eyes would be filled with anything BUT hope.

And he'd killed that. Butchered it. Dissected it.

He felt himself choking, and forced his eyes open. And, jumped up, startled, as he saw those precious eyes staring right at him on the center screen.

Full lips he knew to be a deep rosy pink formed a word, and Lex shivered. His name...on those lips, nothing but sensual and terrifying.

Before he could blink watery eyes, there was a loud pop in the penthouse, like the sound barrier breaking. He laughed wildly, and waited for the stinging slap of air he knew was coming. Couldn't stop the tremors that wracked his body when Clark was miraculously standing in front of him.

"Clark..." He didn't know, for a moment, how to speak. Finding his voice, he drew a deep breath. "I suppose you're upset."

Clark's eyebrows rose up, hiding beneath a tangle of choppy bangs. "Why would I be upset? I've known about the cameras for a year now, Lex."

Lex found himself gaping, utterly uncouth, and shook his head violently. "No. No, you haven't. You would've-"

"Don't presume to know what I would have done, Lex." Clark's voice was strangely kind. The shock of it drained the blood from Lex's face.

"I don't understand. Are you going to kill me, Clark?"

He laughed. Full-out and loud, and beautiful in it's purity. Lex watched, spellbound, as Clark threw back his head and just laughed. Tears ran down his face.

"Clark-"

"Oh, Lex. C'mon. You know that's not something I would ever do. Not to anyone. Not to you." He wiped away the streaming drops from a baby-smooth cheek and sucked in a calming breath. "I could never kill you. Don't be a dork."

"What I did-"

"Was wrong." Clark's voice was all seriousness now, deep and strong and throaty. "What you did to me is something I couldn't forget. I've tried, and it's always there. I go without sleep sometimes, because it's in my dreams. It never stops hurting."

Lex nodded, his movements jerky and stiff. "Of course. I know that to even call it a mistake goes beyond the realm of understatement, Clark. To say that I'm sorry isn't enough, and it never will be. But, I've tried...I've attempted to...maybe not make up for what I did, but to become something different."

"Except for the spying." Clark's voice was toneless, flat.

"Yes, except for that." Lex agreed.

Clark stepped back, leaned against the wall of screens. He craned his neck, looking up at them, and slowly, carefully, looked back into Lex's face. The light from the televisions threw shadows on his face, and his eyes were shining lights in the dark.

"You haven't been the only one watching, Lex." Clark said, shrugging a shoulder at the shudder that ran through Lex's too-slender frame. "I've seen what you've been doing. I know you stopped the serious surveillance on me. And, I know you've still been working with the meteors...but not on people. Not anymore." A heavy sigh was the only sound he made for a long minute, before he began speaking again. "I know everything else, too, Lex. You've been punishing yourself."

"No, Clark, you don't understand." Lex rasped, his eyes desperate. Lex Luthor, desperate. The thought nearly brought him to hysterics, and he fought it back, digging perfect, shining fingernails into a tender palm.

"I think I do, Lex. Maybe I can understand better than anyone." Clark stepped forward, raising a tanned hand to lay against the side of Lex's head. "I said I could never forget, Lex, and I can't. But, I can forgive, and I have. You need to, too. You can't keep doing this...you're killing yourself, day by day, and it's time to stop. It's time to let this go."

He would have fallen if Clark hadn't caught him, and he clutched muscled arms, dug in. "How can you forgive me? HOW?! I let them...no, I did it. It was ME! You were cut OPEN, and bleeding, and it was because of me."

"I was," Clark agreed, "and it was horrible. You stopped it, Lex. You did the right thing, in the end. I know you have these dark places inside of you, things that you have to fight and claw through to just THINK sometimes. But, you do it. You DID it. And, it took me a long time to completely understand that, but I do now, Lex. And, I'm sorry it took me so long."

"God, Clark," Lex was clinging to him, now. Pushing his face against an immovable chest, wetting the soft cotton there. "Don't apologize. I don't deserve it."

"Lex," Clark's voice was soft, tender, "you deserve so much more than you think." He pushed Lex back, gently, and met his eyes. "You remember that I told you that I'd loved you? That I'd loved who you could have been?" Beautiful, amazing eyes locked onto Lex's and refused to release him. "That was a lie. It was never past tense. It wouldn't have hurt so badly if it was. I loved you still, then, and I love you now. I never stopped, Lex. I just couldn't get past the anger, and the fear. You were right. I never totally trusted you. I never let myself. And, I'm not going to lie to you now; I'm not going to tell you that I trust you now."

Lex shivered in the arms of the man he had once broken so completely, and saw...for the first time, in a very long time, the hope he had missed with such sorrow and guilt.

"Clark, I don't think you understand everything. I've been IN love with you since you were 15. And, I still did that to you. And...I still want you...want to be WITH you." Lex shook his head, choking on a heaving breath. "Even in the impossibility of it all, I still desire you. You can't not know that."

He watched dark hair shine in the artificial light as Clark nodded solemnly. "I've known for a long time, Lex." He chuckled softly, as he lowered his face to Lex's temple, and huffed out a warm breath against the skin there. "Somehow, we'll get there."

Lex shot back, shock and horror all over his aristocratic features. "Clark! No, I can't- you KNOW. You know what I'm capable of. You said it yourself-"

"I did. And, I think we can make it work. I think we can both get there, with time, Lex. I think it's worth it, in the end."

"You forgive me..." Lex's voice was small, filled with wonder.

"I do."

"Stupid, foolish, idiotic-" Lex's words were muffled against Clark's mouth as Clark lifted Lex up against him. Tongues slid against each other, and Lex felt the dizzying spin of his mind melting against the assault on his mouth.

"Clark, we can't let this-"

"We can."

"I'll hurt you."

"I don't doubt it."

Lex shook his head and grasped Clark's black hair, using it to tug his swollen mouth down. Whispered against it. "I won't be able to forgive either one of us if I ever-"

Clark nipped Lex's already bruised lower lip. "I know."

He watched Clark pull away, a hand outstretched, fingers still reaching out to his, even as he walked backwards towards a gaping doorway.

"Clark, please-"

"I'll be back." Clark said with a sweet smile, full of the sunshine Lex felt like he'd been away from for a lifetime. "I'll be back, Lex. This isn't the end."

"No, not the end." Lex's voice was still worried, and Clark moved back for a moment.

"This is a beginning, Lex." He held out his hand, and placed a dirty, broken watch in Lex's outstretched hand.

Lex's face was open and raw, full of shock and faith, "I threw it...I threw it over the edge."

"I caught it." Clark murmured. "It's time to start wearing it again, Lex. I caught it. And, I'll catch you, too, if you need it."

~~~Thanks for the review, and to everyone who's read this. I appreciate the support. Oh, and just so those who care know (lol), I am currently at work on yet another dirty, saucy, sexy-as-hell story! lol So...yay!
~Morgan