Fulfilling a Need

“What are you doing here?” he asked and she ignored him, walking into his house. “What are you doing here?” he asked again, thinking that she hadn’t heard him the first time.

“I don’t know,” she said, watching him close his door and take a few steps towards her. They were silent for a moment, staring at each other, daring one another to say something. She watched his tongue come out to lick his dry lips and brought her own fingers to her mouth.

“Do you need something?” His voice was strained.

“Yes,” she said huskily, but didn’t elaborate.

“What? What do you need, Sara?”

“I need to know why I can drive over here with every intention of yelling at you and telling you that I’m leaving, but then when I see you I want nothing more than to go back to work and make you proud of me.”

Grissom’s eyebrows rose in confusion. “What?”

“I need to know why when I see you hurt, my chest aches and I have to force my arms not to wrap themselves around you,” Sara said, tears springing to her eyes. She looked away and quickly brought up one hand to wipe them away before facing him again. His mouth was open and he could only stare at her.

“I need to know why before I go to sleep I always wonder what it would be like to have you beside me, holding me after making love, telling me that I’m beautiful.”

“Sara…”

“Damnit,” she shouted suddenly and hit her fist against her thigh, “I need to know why I love you Grissom! Why do I love you?”

“Don’t say that,” he said and Sara saw the anger flash through his eyes.

“But I need to know,” she protested weakly.

“Don’t say that Sara. Don’t say it,” he said again, shaking his head and clenching his jaw.

“But it’s true,” she said in a whisper that caused Grissom to look up into her eyes, “I love you and you love me.”

“Don’t. Please Sara, please don’t,” he said, sounding strangled, eyes darting around like he was trying to find an escape route.

“I love you and you love me,” she repeated.
Grissom bit his bottom lip and shifted his weight from foot to foot. Sara watched him, wanting nothing more than to hug him, to hug the scared man in front of her.

“You love me,” she said with a note of finality.

“Yes,” Grissom choked out. And then he moved forward, his hands holding Sara’s face, his lips pressing hard against hers. When he pulled back, she could see the hotness in his eyes. “Yes, I love you Sara.”

She kissed him, wrapping her arms around him, pulling him towards her. She felt his body relax against her and his tongue gently touch hers. He groaned a little and she immediately pushed him away.

The confused expression on his face bordered on panic, but then her hands grabbed his shirt and started to pull it up. He understood. He threw his shirt off and then began to remove hers. While she pulled it over her head, his fingers went to the button of her pants and he quickly undid them and hooked his index fingers in two belt loops and tugged them down. They went willingly and he bent a little to push them all the way down to her ankles. Smiling, she placed a hand on his shoulder and hurriedly shoved her shoes and socks off before stepping out of her pants.

When her hands went for his belt, he stood motionless. He was transfixed by the sight of Sara before him, clad only in her bra and panties. ‘Lavender lace,’ he thought to himself and wondered if she always wore such lovely underthings or if she had worn them today because she knew…

“You’re beautiful,” he murmured and Sara stopped to smile at him. His gaze was wandering over her body and she wondered if he even knew he had spoken aloud. She placed her hand on his cheek and he met her eyes. “Very beautiful,” he said to her. She left his belt for the moment and wrapped her arms around him, feeling the muscles in his back move as he brought his arms around her. Sara loved how warm he was, how solid his chest was and she smeared a kiss across it before resting her head on his shoulder. They stood that way for a minute, but then Sara turned her head and began to kiss his chest in a way that made Grissom very aware of the need to get to his bedroom soon.

Grissom’s knees bent and Sara found herself hoisted in the air, her legs wrapping around him as if that was their natural position. Sara giggled and reached behind her to unclasp her bra. She tossed it aside and then tightly hugged Grissom. He felt the warmth of her bare breasts pressed against him and he felt himself grow harder.

He stopped at his bedside and Sara smiled lazily. “What do you want me to do?” he asked her.

She was taken aback by the question, but when she saw the heated look in his eyes, his pupils growing larger, she bit her lip and ran a finger through his hair, letting a curl wrap around it. Then she moved forward so that she had access to his ear and whispered, “I want you to make me scream your name and fuck me so hard and so deep I’ll have a hard time walking tomorrow.”

Grissom swallowed hard and put one knee on the bed before releasing Sara. She bounced a bit on the mattress and watched Grissom lick his lips, his hungry expression mirroring hers. He stepped back and finished the job Sara had started. She wondered how just the sound of his zipper being lowered could excite her. Eyes never leaving hers, he pushed his pants and boxers down around his ankles and then kicked them away. Sara lifted her hips and removed her panties. They were able to keep the stare going for a moment longer before curiosity got the better of them.

Grissom’s eyes traveled Sara’s body. The sight of her breasts made him throb, so hard by now that it was beginning to be painful. He wanted to kiss them and worship them for as long as she would let him. He wanted to kiss her stomach and rest his head on it after making her come, he wanted to stroke the soft hair at the junction of her thighs and taste the liquid that dampened it.

Sara had already fallen in love with Grissom’s broad shoulders and chest. Now, she almost laughed when she realized how giddy she was over his stomach and belly-button. Her eyes took in the line of his hips and then…then she felt a deep throb between her legs and gasped. His cock stood out from him, defying gravity. She immediately wanted to touch it, to taste it, to feel it inside her. It was long and thick and Sara clenched her thighs together and whimpered. He was distracted from his own appreciation of her body by her gasp and quickly looked at her face, worried that he would find regret or sadness there. But then she looked up at him with hooded eyes and said “I don’t think you’re going to have any problems doing what I want.” He smiled at that and she did the same, then threw her head back and laughed at the very idea of discussing sex with Grissom in anything other than a scientific capacity. Grissom chuckled under his breath and then climbed on the bed, going for the throat she had so thoughtfully put on display. He kissed it and felt the vibration of Sara’s laughter, which turned into a moan when his teeth scraped the skin.

She lowered her head to look at him and with a wicked gleam in her eyes, she pushed him over onto his back and straddled him, feeling his erection brush against her stomach as she settled herself. They smiled, but after looking into each other’s eyes, the smiles faded and Grissom brought his hand to Sara’s cheek. She leaned against it and closed her eyes.

“I love you Sara. I’m sorry it took me so long to say it. I’m glad you knew it, but it must have hurt…to know. It hurt me,” he said and Sara kept her eyes tightly closed, relishing the feel of his hand on her face.

When she opened her eyes, she smiled, but Grissom could see the tears glittering in her eyes. Silently, she leaned forward and kissed his lips, then the cleft in his chin, and then began on his thick neck that she had longed to kiss since she met him. She was pleased to hear him moan low in his chest, a combination of her kisses and the fact that his cock was now pressed between their bodies. She wiggled her hips a bit and heard his gasp, as well as felt his Adam’s apple bob up and down under her lips. His hands immediately clenched her rear to still her. Sara smiled into his skin and moved down to kiss his shoulders, then his chest, sliding her body against his, eliciting another low moan.

Grissom became alarmed when he realized Sara wasn’t stopping her descent. Her tongue sought out both of his nipples, biting them playfully. Then she kissed his sternum and moved further down, dragging her tongue along his stomach.

“Sara…” he hissed and she sat up, tossing her hair back and raising an eyebrow.

“Yes?”

“I can’t take too much,” he warned.

Her right hand reached out and her fingers curled around his shaft, feeling him throb against her palm. “Not even if I go slow?” she asked, then smiled when Grissom could only look helplessly at her.

She bent down and kissed the leaking head, then slowly pushed her mouth around him, suckling lightly. She heard Grissom swear under his breath and looked up to find him looking at her. He brushed some loose strands of hair away and tucked them behind her ear. Sara’s hand lightly caressed him before she repeated her previous action and slowly drew him into her mouth again.

Her left hand let her know how far she could take him. She would speed up and when she felt his stomach tense she would slow down. Sometimes she would stop completely and take time to kiss his thigh or nuzzle his abdomen, giving him the opportunity to relax a bit. He felt like he was going to die from the sweetest torture in the world, his balls ached with tension and when Sara lightly squeezed them his hips rose off the bed before his brain could register the sensations. He’d heard her giggle then and vowed that he would be just as ruthless when he got his opportunity to explore her.

“No more,” he said breathlessly and Sara heard the desperation in his voice. She quickly moved up and kissed him on the mouth, a kiss he met eagerly wrapping his fingers in her soft hair.

“But I liked it,” she protested when the kiss had ended.

“So did I. Too much,” he said with a smirk and Sara quickly recognized the same wicked glint in his eyes that her own had had before and she squealed when he flipped her over onto her back. “So now it’s my turn.”

Sara pretended to think about this. “Well, I guess it’s only fair,” she said and Grissom muffled her laughter with his mouth. He kissed her firmly, her tongue sought his, and Sara felt her body relax. He broke the kiss and pressed his lips to her cheek, then her ear.

“Are you going to let me taste you?” he whispered and Sara shivered. She knew what he meant.

“You can do anything you want,” she whispered back in a voice braver than she felt. The relaxation she had felt was gone, replaced by the most wonderful anticipation she could imagine.

“Good,” he said and placed kisses along her jawline, down her throat. He brought his right hand up to the center of her chest, feeling her heart pounding. He watched her face, the small flare of her nostrils, the reddening of her cheeks. She watched him too, until his hand suddenly moved across her breast and she closed her eyes and sucked in a deep breath. Then his mouth was on the other, his tongue circling her nipple before lightly flicking it and Sara’s hands buried themselves in his hair, part of her wanting to pull him closer, the other part wanting to push him away because it was too much. His lips dragged across her chest to the other breast and he gave it the same attention. He was amazed by the softness of her skin, the taste of it, the sound of her breath when it caught in her throat.

He kissed her stomach, nuzzled it and smiled when he heard her soft laughter. He kissed the insides of her thighs, nuzzled them and smiled when he heard her quiet pleas whispered to him.

She opened her eyes wide and bit her lip when his tongue lightly touched her swollen, tender flesh. She brought a hand up to her mouth to stifle the scream she could already feel building inside her. She also felt tears and felt ridiculous until she realized that it wasn’t her body’s reaction that made her want to cry, but Grissom’s. She could feel the slight tremor in his fingers as he stroked her, the way his mouth made it clear that this wasn’t something he was doing because he felt he had to, but because he wanted to. When she realized this, she propped herself up on her elbows and watched him, entranced. She would grit her teeth and growl when his thick fingers hit a particularly sensitive spot and she would tilt her head back and cry out when his tongue returned to her clit, but she watched him. She saw nothing on his face that gave any indication he was not enjoying himself just as much as she. She ran her fingers through his hair, causing him to look up at her and pause. Their eyes met and she smiled. He did the same, a perfect moment of understanding between them, and then lowered his head, gently bringing her flesh into his mouth and suckling.

Sara’s body tensed and her hips lightly bucked against Grissom’s mouth. “More, more, just a bit…please, more,” she begged and Grissom increased his pressure and that was all it took. Sara’s low wail hit his ears and Grissom knew he would never tire of that sound. Her eyes were closed, not wanting to see anything, just wanting to feel. The pleasure radiated from her core, feeling like it traveled all the way up her body and then escaped through the screams coming from her mouth. It seemed to last forever, but when it finally subsided, Sara whimpered and fought to catch her breath.

Grissom had released her and moved up just a bit, to rest his head on her stomach. ‘Fulfilling a fantasy already,’ he thought to himself and smiled before placing soft kisses around her bellybutton. “Oh god, Gil, oh god that was so good. So good. Gil, so good, oh my god,” she rambled causing Grissom to smother his laughter with more kisses. He closed his eyes, enjoying her fingers raking through his hair, the rise and fall of his head as she regained normal breathing. When he felt her body finally recover and slump into complete relaxation, he lifted himself and began to kiss his way up her body. After devoting his attention only to Sara’s pleasure for so long, he suddenly became aware that he had become even harder, the pain now a more definite sensation, and he briefly thought that if for some reason they were interrupted he would die.

He nuzzled her neck and she turned to kiss his cheek as best she could. “That was wonderful,” she said with a satisfied sigh.

“So I heard,” Grissom said and Sara chuckled lazily.

“But…” she began and rolled her hips upward a bit, making Grissom growl at the contact, “we’re not done yet, are we?”

“God, I hope not,” Grissom said breathlessly and Sara pulled him to her, kissing his lips firmly.

“You still have to keep your promise. Hard and deep,” she said, meeting his eyes and slowly licking her lips.

“Are you on something? Are we ok?” he asked.

“I’m on the pill…and everything else is fine…right?”

“Right,” he said and kissed her again, groaning into her mouth as her left hand made its way down and wrapped itself around his cock. He had to pull away from her and close his eyes, taking a slow, deep breath. Her fingers slowly moved on him and, after a few agonizing seconds for Grissom, guided him towards her. Before she could do anything more, he grabbed her hand and brought it up beside her head, twining their fingers together. “This is going to change everything.”

She tried to decode what he was saying, but couldn’t. He was looking at her fiercely, possessively, lovingly, she thought, but she still wasn’t sure. “For the better?” she asked, tentatively.

“Yes,” he said and then helpless cries escaped them both as he moved his hips forward and sunk into her. He released her hand and Sara quickly grabbed his shoulders, digging her nails into his skin. His breath was hot against her neck. “You feel…perfect, Sara. Perfect.” He didn’t know any other word to use, he wanted to be poetical, but couldn’t. ‘Perfect’ was the simplest way to express himself.

He started to gently thrust, Sara relieved that he gave her time for her body to grow used to him. In her mind, all sorts of thoughts were going through her head…how much she loved him, how good he felt inside her, how having him on her made her feel small, protected, and safe. But she couldn’t say any of these things right now, the connection between her brain and voice having been broken. Right now, her body was in charge and she was able to only make animalistic sounds to express her pleasure.

Grissom pushed himself up to his hands, his strong arms supporting him as he began to roll his hips, managing to keep pressure on her clit with his pelvis. He looked down at her and she weakly grasped his biceps. “Now…harder, now,” she said and he closed his eyes as he began to pound against her. Sara cried out with each thrust, clutching his arms, tilting her head back and closing her eyes. He watched her face, amazed at the expressions that flit across it. For a split second he thought he saw pain but then it was replaced by a beatific smile. Then she seemed to bare her teeth in a growl before opening her eyes and looking completely vulnerable. “More, please, more now,” she said.

Grissom suddenly lowered himself and slid his hands beneath her shoulders, then he hoisted her up so that he was on his knees, her legs wrapped around him, and they were face to face, noses nearly touching. He began to move, Sara hugged him tightly, very aware of the sensations building in her body. She was amazed that she’d been able to feel them once already and was now about to again. One of Grissom’s arms was around her, holding her against him, the other was under her bottom, supporting her as he thrust up into her. “God, Sara!” Grissom said, cherishing the feel of her breasts against his chest, the sound of the whimpers he forced from her with each thrust.

“Right there…just a little more, I’m right there, you’re so deep, so good, almost there” she panted and then she threw her head back and cried out as she came hard and loud. Her muscles clenched around Grissom and he was unable to hold back any longer. He thrust once more and then held her, feeling the rush of his fluid erupting inside her, feeling like he may pass out. Sara was aware that Grissom was coming as well and forced her eyes open so she could watch his face. She ground her hips against him and watched the anguished expression on his face with an indefinable satisfaction.

He opened his eyes, his dazed expression making her smile and wonder if she looked the same. He smiled and moved forward to lay her on her back. Before he could move, she wrapped her arms and legs around him. He sunk gratefully onto her, knowing she would tell him if he was too heavy. She stroked his damp hair and listened to her pounding heart and his ragged breathing. After a few minutes, Grissom wearily lifted his head and gave Sara a goofy smile that she found incredibly sweet.

“How do you feel?” he asked softly.

She looked up at the ceiling and tried to find the words, but finally gave up. “I can’t describe it, but whatever it is I feel, it’s definitely something I wouldn’t mind feeling on a regular basis.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” he said and rested his head on her shoulder again. More minutes passed. “I can’t believe this has happened. I have no regrets,” he added quickly, “but when I got up today, I certainly didn’t expect my day to end like this.”

Sara pressed more kisses into his hair and let her fingernails lightly run over his back and shoulders. “You were right though. This does change everything. I can’t go back…”

“Neither can I,” he interrupted.

“What are we going to do?” she asked. He thought for a few minutes.

“We’re going to sleep and when we get up tomorrow we’ll take everything hour by hour and day by day and I’ll love you and you’ll love me.”

“That’s a good plan,” Sara said and closed her eyes.