koayanisgatsi

Koyaanisqatsi
(Life Out Of Balance)

Chapter I – The Need


Abby stood at the door not really knowing what she was doing there.
What had taken her to need him?
Why did his touch have such a hold on her?
Maybe this was just because he was leaving… … … … …
She sighed... ..She knew better than this, she should leave, … … … but her legs didn’t seem to know what her mind had decided.
She still didn’t know why she ended up here, but that hug, the hug they had shared a couple of hours ago, that hug had brought back to surface all the feelings she had buried deep inside herself to try and cover them from him and even from herself.
But tonight when he had told her he was leaving, she felt her heart breaking into small pieces.
She felt the need to cry when she imagined life without him there. And in an instant she felt the need to feel him, his arms, his body, his warmth ... ... ... Abby desperately needed Luka inside her, in a way she hadn’t needed him before and finally driven by the same impulse that had made her legs find the way to his door, she knocked.

To her surprise it didn’t take him long to open it.
And there he stood, as gorgeous and sexy as always.
A smile spread across his lips as his eyes found hers, looking up at him.
The rest of the world became a blur to her; none existent even.

Words weren’t needed; they were never needed between them.
His eyes smiled at her, knowing what they both desperately needed.

So he had been right!

She needed him.
Luka had been sure Carter could make her happy, that if he let go of her, she would at least be happy with John, but he had been wrong.
And if he could not deal with all her problems, he at least was offering her something Carter didn’t, relief, a moment of peace a moment to forget the world and be locked inside pleasure, something he could easily read in her eyes, only he could provide.

Abby’s hands explored his face; two fingers ran on his lips, God how she needed him.
At that second, at that thought, everything else was gone within a second, there was no world around them, no Maggie, no Erik, no Carter, none of them existed anymore, not to her and surely enough not to him.


His hand went around her waist and he pulled her body tight with his.
Their lips met in a passionate kiss, like none before. The hunger, the passion that filled the air was unbearable. It had been locked up for too long.


He had to stop kissing her to get some air, but that didn't stop him from nuzzling against her cheek. Hell, who needs to breath anyway?
Slowly he moved his lips and kissed her jaw, his lips moved from there to the side of her face, and they lingered against her neck for a while.
He planted soft kisses on her collarbone, so soft that they made Abby let out a long, warm sigh. That would not do. He needed to hear her moan, he wanted to feel her moan. So he kissed the side of her neck, and sucked on her skin gently, feeling her throat's resonance against his lips.
He worked his way up and found her mouth again, this time kissing her in a more animalistic way, almost as if he was trying to eat her alive.
The way his tongue moved inside her mouth, caressing every inch inside, she remembered she always prayed this kiss would never end.
Abby let her tongue caress the top of his mouth, causing him to moan deliciously.

With one swift motion, Luka had her in his arms and made his way up the stairs into his room.
He wanted her in his bed, he needed her smell on his pillow. He was scared of how this would end, petrified.
He had lost her before and had stayed with nothing but memories, this time he would be sure to keep at least her scent on his bed.

He carefully laid her down and came on top, his legs on each side of her.
Taking a second before things moved on, he pulled back for a moment to look at her, smiling as he made a memory of each line of her body, every curve of it.

Abby pulled him closer again moaning against his mouth. With her free hand, she reached down, rubbing him against his pants. God, he was big, and so incredibly thick, she remembered always loving how gigantic he felt inside her, leaving no gap as he filled her completely already with only half of himself inside her.

"Abby," Luka sighed, jumping back from the wonderful feel of her touch.
As she had guessed, his touch became more desperate, the need to feel her skin had taken the better of him and the amount of clothes they both had on were driving him nuts, he wanted them out of her as fast as possible.

He was glad though she wasn’t with that thick coat she had been earlier in the ER, instead she was wearing a very sexy white blouse with a gorgeous cleavage and gray jeans with three buttons instead of a zipper.
She looked so beautiful, sexier than he had ever seen her. And it was driving him crazy, God the clothes had to go, NOW!!

His klutzy fingers began to fumble with her blouse. It was taking too long, though, and that was time he could not waste. Without even thinking about it, his hands tightened against the fabric of her shirt and small white buttons flew everywhere.

"Luka!" Abby complained.

"I'll buy you ten of the same," He said in a strange voice

Abby smiled, and her hands began to softly go up and down the inside of his thigh.
Luka whispered something she couldn't understand against her neck, closing his eyes tight.


He sank teeth on her braw and ripped it off wasting no time in sinking his mouth on her breasts.
Abby’s hands moved up through his body, resting on the buttons of his shirt. She began to slowly open each one letting her hands play with every inch of revealed skin.


Her head was thrown back, her eyes closed at the incredible touch of his tongue on her. He sucked on the nipple gently, feeling it harden against his tongue. He traced the areola, once and twice, and once again, and he could feel Abby's heart pounding against her breast. His hands slipped down and his fingers undid the button of her pants. Without even taking them off, he reached his hand inside, and it made its way inside her panty until his fingers found what they were looking for. She was already wet and he found that delicious.


"Luka please," she pleaded, but knew she had signed a contract with the devil.
His fingers and tongue were circling two of the weakest parts of her body.

“The night is young my love” He whispered into her ear and made his back to her breasts.

Feeling the need for him begin to cry within her and the despair to feel his skin against hers she pinched his nipples.


“ABBY!!” He demanded but smiled as he saw the despair in her eyes, begging to feel his skin.

He took her hands into his and kissed them lightly, each finger and helped her free him of his shirt, shoes, socks and pants, throwing them across the floor.
He came back on top brushing his chest against her breasts.
Her hands held him there, one hand around his neck making it’s way up to his hair, and the other rested on his hip.

He let her enjoy the moment, as she nibbled on his earlobe whispering words, which took him to a whole new level of desire. But than again with her it was always like this, every single time they had sex there was something new, something to drive him out of his mind.


Abby could feel him hard against her thighs, so incredibly hard, she thought he was about to burst.
She moved her hands and he took the cue, helping her to free herself of her jeans along with her black thong. Jesus she had come ready to drive him out of his mind!! She was now fully naked, and, oh, so wonderfully inviting.
He grinned, looking into her eyes, but soon his face turned serious.
“You Are Soo beautiful and, God, so sexy”
She smiled softly and let her hands run on his chest, round to his back to the limit of his black boxer shorts.


Again her hands cupped him, feeling his size and causing him to moan her name softly.
He removed her hand, knowing if she kept going he would loose it completely right there.

Again he began to plant small kisses down her body, stopping on each breast, and on her navel, until he reached what he knew would make Abby roll her eyes. But the night was young. Why rush?
His hands caressed her thighs, and he looked up briefly to see Abby holding on to one pillow tightly. He deposited little kisses on her most sensitive areas. He could hear Abby pleading some more, but he wouldn't budge.
His tongue took a taste of that sweet nectar. She was so wet that he knew it wouldn't take him long, but he gave her the benefit of the doubt. Abby was holding on to his hair, urging him in, and Luka decided to indulge her a little. He wrapped his mouth over her clit, feeling it throb strongly. His left hand held her hand, and she was squeezing it so hard, but God, it was good.
Abby couldn't control her legs.

This was probably the best feeling in the entire world. Not that they hadn't done it before, but Luka had never been so teasing. It was torturing, but that made it twice as exciting.


He grinned against her as he let a finger go inside, teasing as they moved in and out. That made Abby shudder, and he smiled wider against her.
The fact that she was moaning so loudly made him feel like a man, a big man. He could feel her nearing her climax, could hear it and could also taste it. So he slipped in yet another finger as his tongue worked faster.

Abby's hips paralyzed for a moment, and he let go of her to take a hold of them. He heard her cry out his name as she came, panting for air. Luka pulled back and looked up at her, her eyes closed, her face pleased. He smiled and kissed his way up, her abdomen, her navel, her ribs, one nipple, the other, her chest, her neck, her jaw, and her mouth. For a moment Abby felt like Luka was doing CPR on her. But soon he pulled back and she took that moment to take a deep breath, but he continued to nuzzle her neck.


With a strength that was unknown to her she pined him down and came on top.
Luka smiled when he realized what was about to happen.
Her hands played with his chest, massaging him deliciously. Her lips and tongue followed her hands paying more attention to the scars on his body, almost as if healing them completely. She was now sucking on his stomach, and without a warning, her hand caressed him over his boxers, her touch almost feather like. Luka moaned loudly at that, wishing there wasn't a piece of fabric separating them.


"Abby," he pleaded, but Abby didn't listen, she would have it her way tonight, and he would have to deal with it, but she was sure, he would be smiling soon enough. With one hand, she reached up his boxers, playing and stroking his balls.
She felt his whole body tremble and kissed his lips hungrily as she removed his boxers with her hands, her nails brushing against him making him moan huskily.
Abby watched, amazed at what she was causing him. He usually liked to be the one in control, but tonight, things were different, his eyes watched as she worked on him, his hands caressed her body, every line in it.


She felt completely enveloped by his body. He was so big, so gentle, and so strong. So safe!! As if for the first time, he was really hers.

Her mouth moved to his again and she kissed him, long, soft. “I’m gonna make you forget every other woman you had. … …”

He smiled as the words came out of her mouth “You already have” he whispered kissing her hand.


She kissed his chin and down his body, finally she reached and kissed one thigh gently, and then the other one as her hand rubbed him gently. Her mouth moved up a little, but not enough, and sucked on the side of his hip. She held his erection with her hand and kissed the tip, hearing as Luka let out a sigh. Her tongue finally encircled it, going up and down, left and right, her hand caressing the insides of his thigh. She finally took him in fully, but too slowly. Her mouth and tongue worked wonders on him, she had him completely inside, although she never believed it would fit, and worked her tongue magically around it. She could hear Luka moaning and it was like music to her ears.
Luka ached his head back. This was the most delicious incredible feeling in the world. It had never been like this with Danjiella, she would never do that to him. But with Abby, … … … … God, he loved sex with this woman. Suddenly she began working faster, and his fingers had to tangle themselves on her hair or he'd have to punch a wall. Even inside her mouth her tongue kept licking him up and down, and he could feel his orgasm nearing.
Abby could feel it too.
She softly caressed his butt, and his thighs as her mouth and tongue worked on him. It was a matter of seconds now, his whole body began to tremble, and soon enough he came screaming "Abby! Jesus Christ!" as his seed filled her mouth and she swallowed him licking him clean.

Panting for air, Luka reached her buttocks with his hands and pulled her closer instinctively, he had to have her, now, he had to be inside her, to watch her move as their bodies danced together.
And he could see it in her eyes she felt the same way.

Her hands held him, massaging him, letting her fingers play up and down his shaft and as her nail brushed on him he sprang up high again. Ready, if possible even more ready than he had been before.

God, he felt gigantic in her hand. What? 14 inches?
Her hand guided him to her entrance and she lightly rubbed him against it, she knew he loved this.

His devilish smiled told her she had been right.

He bit her lower lip, and his hand played with her nipple. Abby parted her legs and Luka finally pushed himself inside of her slowly, inch by inch, letting her feel his length entering her, filling her completely to her depths.
Each one of his thrusts was like the last one. It wasn't forced, but more like he was taking his time, kissing her neck, face, and mouth as he did so.
His voice had changed. It had become even more hoarse than ever before, and she loved hearing it whisper her name to her ear.


Her body was rocking and his eyes marveled at the rhythm they were moving.
Their shadows danced up and down, beautifully, magically.

Their hands held tight together, their fingers enlaced, Abby watched as her body rocked with him inside. Their unison was so beautiful, so delicious, but still she felt she needed him closer and tried to lower herself even deeper, the gesture made Luka understand what she wanted and he traced the sides of her body until he reached her thigh and raised it slightly. He pushed her hip down, making her lay down on her back, and rolled on top of her.

Thankful, Abby enlaced her legs around his waist opening her legs wide for him to go as far deep as he could. She grabbed his buttocks, pulling him even closer. She couldn't believe how deep into her he was, pushing himself in and out with grace and kissing her neck and lips. If she didn't have that bad habit of biting her nails, Luka's back would look like ground meat.

Luka let out a loud grunt, holding Abby's thigh in place with his hand. He didn't think he'd last this long. Abby's hands were searching all over his body, stroking his buttocks and rubbing his nipples.
Then the beginning of the end started, the part in which there's blood racing all over their bodies and their climaxes neared. Luka held on to Abby's hips tightly and raised her, her bag touching the wall, he grunted louder as he worked faster and faster, deeper and deeper.
Abby was moaning with every pump and so was he, and she suddenly dug her short nails into his back, she screamed out loud as the orgasm that washed over was like none before in her life. It didn't take Luka long to follow after that, filling her completely with his seed, she was washed with his warm liquid running inside her. And he sucked on to the side of her neck to make his cry less audible.

For a moment he laid there on top of her, trying to catch his breath and feeling that delicious exhaustion. He finally pulled himself out of her slowly, making Abby moan once more. She rested her head on his upper arm, feeling bruised between her legs.


“Abby,” he breathed. “I love you.”
In the entire year they’d dated, nor any of the encounters that followed, he’d never said it to her before. Granted, it had been in the note he’d left at her place once, and he had whispered it in Croatian often after they’d made love. But never like this, in English. Her eyes filled. His brow wrinkled in concern.


“Luka,” she whispered, her breathing quickening, her voice full of tears. “Please don’t let go.”
He wrapped his arms around her, once again pulling her close, letting her sense the safety of him. “Never,” he breathed into her ear.
With this incredible feeling, Abby closed her eyes and let the sleep take the better of her. She felt as his lips kept laying soft kisses on her shoulder and his hands kept caressing her back, keeping her warm, and unaware of the reality of the world outside this walls.

She woke up disorientated, Her eyes searching the darkness for something familiar his arms around her. But the pillow beside her was empty.
Getting out of bed, she found a note on the his pillow and took it in her hands, reaching out on the floor for his shirt and putting it on, she made her way downstairs.

She cursed herself for not bringing her purse with her cigarettes.

It was still early, the sun not yet peeking up to wake the city. Though it was mid-June, there was a slight chill in the air, and she was grateful for Luka’s size, his shirt a nightgown on her.
She leaned up against the wall, staring out the window at the blackness. There was something reassuring about night, the way it hid problems that threatened to break us during the day. It was a time when most of the world was sleeping, dreaming away into different worlds, where problems did not exist.
She looked back at the clock on the kitchen wall, 4:30 in the morning. What time had he left?
Suddenly her eyes found him downstairs, he was walking out of the building. Not thinking twice Abby raced out of the apartment running as fast as she could down the stairs, but as she reached the outside of the building the cab that had been waiting for him was making his way around the curve and within seconds he was gone.

For long minutes she stood there watching the horizon line, her arms crossed in front of her chest.
She took a quick look at the note in her hands but did not dare to read it.
She couldn’t deal with the pain right now.