Anti-Quick
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zMisplaced Stories [ADMIN use only] › Celeb › Canadian Idol
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770
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Category:
zMisplaced Stories [ADMIN use only] › Celeb › Canadian Idol
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
770
Reviews:
0
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Canadian Idol, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Anti-Quick
A/N: Anti-Quick is partially true. Read the story. I'll mention which parts were true at the end.
Disclaimer: The Canadian Idol series and its competitors are the property of 19e and CTV. This is a work of fanfiction. No money is being made from this story and no infringement is intended.
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--- X --- Anti-Quick --- X ---
--- by paperbacksniper ---
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Billy stared up at the Canadian Idol stage, pride filling his heart. Something More had been absolutely corny; Straight Up the Middle was just gay. And this song? Billy wasn’t even paying attention to it anymore. His eyes were glued to a certain singer, a certain dancer, a certain Canadian Idol.
His Canadian Idol.
The song wasn’t even over, but Billy could tell it was nearing completion. He jumped to his feet, clapping and cheering; a bit earlier than the rest of the crowd, but Billy didn’t notice.
But the fan girls did.
They exchanged a Look, and went back to screaming and hollering themselves hoarse. After all, the gayer Billy acted, the harder they cheered.
* * *
Two nights later Billy was sitting in the dressing room at the Mod Club. The thumping beat of music was drifting in under the door. He was re-arranging his hair for the third time that night, and trying to drown out the music as it became louder and more aggravating. And then the music was quieter again, and there were arms about his waist.
Billy turned around and pulled Ryan into a hug. “Hey man!” he said, squishing him with his mighty arms. “You’re here! Fantastic!”
Ryan grinned and kissed Billy quickly on the lips. “I wouldn’t have missed this for the world, Billy.” Another kiss.
The music got worse, and Ryan grimaced. Billy shook his head sadly. “I have no idea where Orange gets the opening acts, but it gives us half an hour alone.”
Ryan looked back at him seductively.
* * *
People chattered out on the floor as a blonde girl on stage in a frumpy pink dress shrieked out the lyrics to a mediocre song.
“You know,” said one girl to the others, “This wouldn’t be half as bad if she could actually sing.”
The other girl nodded. “Or if it was just the band.”
The third girl snickered giddily and murmured something about Clay singing at the Miss American pageant and it being more entertaining. All three girls roared with laughter.
Two head banging women in their mid forties turned around and glared. One girl waved cheekily. The other two smiled. The women turned back around.
* * *
“So Malcolm,” said Billy, as he pushed the smaller man back against the wall, “You took off quite quickly the other night.” Ryan nodded and ran his finger tips down Billy’s spine. Billy growled. “You know that I had to explain to some random guy why it was that I call your cell so much?”
Ryan grinned a bit and started tugging at the buttons on Billy’s shirt. “So Klippert,” he muttered, distracted, “Got time for a quickie?”
* * *
The bad singer kept singing. The scary old women from the Billy Notes board kept head banging. The fan girls kept making snarky comments.
* * *
Ryan kept sucking. Billy kept growling.
* * *
”Shouldn’t he be out by now?” asked one of the fan girls, completely miffed by the fact that he wasn’t. The first band was finally done playing, and it looked as though they could be setting up for Billy’s band.
Another girl came onto the stage, a guitarist following her. The crowd was hopeful… until she took the microphone and began speaking.
”Hey guys!” she said, waving to the crowd. “Billy will be out soon, we just uh… need to find him!”
The guitarist began to play, and the girl began to sing.
The fan girls turned to look at each other with pointed stares. One raised an eyebrow.
“They can’t find him, eh?”
”I bet you Malcolm showed up and shoved him into the dressing room, looking for a quickie.”
“Hey, I’ve got news for you, Malcolm! That ain’t what you call a quickie!”
The Billy Notes women turned to glare some more. The fan girls giggled in response.
* * *
”Ha, so guess what, Ryan?” sauced Billy, as he finished zipping up his pants. “That wasn’t a quickie!”
Ryan, who was exiting the dressing room, began humming Straight Up the Middle in response.
Billy stared for a moment. “Not tonight, not ever!”
Ryan smiled and closed the door behind him.
* * *
Two hours late to appear on stage, Billy finally took over the microphone. “How you guys doing? Thanks for coming out to the show! The support is fantastic!” The crowd screamed.
Out of the corner of his eye, Billy noticed Ryan sneaking out the front door. “Hey. Malcolm was supposed to be here tonight. Anyone see Malcolm around?”
Ryan slipped out the door unnoticed, while the crowd searched the balconies above for him.
Later on that night, while Billy was singing Lindsay and the sea of girls were singing along, he could have sworn he heard someone sing ‘Ryan’ instead of ‘Lindsay’. He shook his head and kept singing. There was no way that his fans would know.
* * *
The fan girls smirked to themselves. They were singing along to Lindsay as loudly as they could. Only …
“RYAN! Don’t say … you’re going to leave me the way that you found me!”
The Billy Notes women glared even more.
* * *
Billy finished signing another autograph and smiled at the next fan. He took the CD cover she wanted signed in one hand, and her shoulder in the other. Amongst the chatter of the crowd, he could hear a few of his fans singing at the back of the line. He grinned for the camera. This publicity would be fantastic. But then …
* * *
“Those Billy Notes freaks are getting on my nerves,” grumbled one of the fan girls.
The Billy Notes people had started a pathetic sing-a-long of about five people in a circle, trying to read the lyrics from the cover of Billy’s CD.
The other fan girls stared at them for a moment as well. Of course the old ladies were annoying. There wasn’t much they could do about it… until the fourth member of the fan girls, who had been sulking about his favourite not winning Canadian Idol, started hollering:
“I WANNA DRIVE IT, STRAIGHT UP THE MIDDLE! NOTHING CAN STOP ME NOW!”
Dead quiet.
A cough.
A glare from the Billy Notes following; they responded with singing Lindsay again.
The fan girls began shrieking Ryan’s name whenever the Billy Notes freaks said Lindsay’s.
The Billy Notes crowd switched it up and began singing Life #9.
The fan girls won when they screamed “We are the Kovered in Lies, and we’re coming to get you! … You muthafucka! You’re going to diiiiiiiiiie!”
Silence again. The security guard watched with fascination. The Billy Notes people gawked. The difference this time was that the Billy Notes scaries stopped singing for good.
The fan girls grinned amongst themselves. Mission accomplished.
* * *
The picture of Billy was taken right at the moment he opened his mouth with shock. He turned to the representative from Orange. “Uh, can I retake that one?” he asked, trying to be heard over Ryan’s fantasy song about topping.
The man shook his head no. “One picture per person, Klippert.”
Billy was crestfallen. The picture was evidence to his relationship with Ryan, he was sure of it. And if not, it could be Photo Shopped to include lewd objects. This was not fantastic.
* * *
Billy pushed Ryan back onto the mattress, covering him with a smattering of well placed kisses.
“You owe me for tonight!” he growled, pressing into him. “And this time, it won’t be a quickie!”
~fin~
(A/N: As I mentioned at the beginning, some parts were true.
I had the adventure of a life time when I got to go see the 2004 Canadian Idol Finale in Toronto this past September (I was on TV for about 2 seconds, holding a "GO KALAN" sign! Ryan Malcolm really did perform. Billy Klippert really was there. And after the show, as we passed Billy on our way out, I overheard him talking to someone. He said "Wait, you're the guy who answered Ryan's cell phone!"
The music at the Mod Club was just as it was in this fic. The first group was terrible, and my friends and I really did say some of those things. The head banging people from the Billy Notes message board really were head banging in front of us, and yes, they did keep turning around to glare at us.
They really couldn't find Billy, and when Billy came on stage he really did ask where Malcolm was that night.
After the performance and during the autograph session, we really did start singing, as the Billy Notes message boarders couldn't sing and were driving us nuts. We ended up singing Straight Up The Middle, which is a Ryan Malcolm song, as well as Fuck You, You're Dead which is a song by Kovered in Lies, the band that Billy had with his brother. He left when he took a solo career, and we were incredibly upset about this.
I have no idea if the parts about him being off with Ryan are true. It's quite possible!)
Disclaimer: The Canadian Idol series and its competitors are the property of 19e and CTV. This is a work of fanfiction. No money is being made from this story and no infringement is intended.
Billy stared up at the Canadian Idol stage, pride filling his heart. Something More had been absolutely corny; Straight Up the Middle was just gay. And this song? Billy wasn’t even paying attention to it anymore. His eyes were glued to a certain singer, a certain dancer, a certain Canadian Idol.
His Canadian Idol.
The song wasn’t even over, but Billy could tell it was nearing completion. He jumped to his feet, clapping and cheering; a bit earlier than the rest of the crowd, but Billy didn’t notice.
But the fan girls did.
They exchanged a Look, and went back to screaming and hollering themselves hoarse. After all, the gayer Billy acted, the harder they cheered.
Two nights later Billy was sitting in the dressing room at the Mod Club. The thumping beat of music was drifting in under the door. He was re-arranging his hair for the third time that night, and trying to drown out the music as it became louder and more aggravating. And then the music was quieter again, and there were arms about his waist.
Billy turned around and pulled Ryan into a hug. “Hey man!” he said, squishing him with his mighty arms. “You’re here! Fantastic!”
Ryan grinned and kissed Billy quickly on the lips. “I wouldn’t have missed this for the world, Billy.” Another kiss.
The music got worse, and Ryan grimaced. Billy shook his head sadly. “I have no idea where Orange gets the opening acts, but it gives us half an hour alone.”
Ryan looked back at him seductively.
People chattered out on the floor as a blonde girl on stage in a frumpy pink dress shrieked out the lyrics to a mediocre song.
“You know,” said one girl to the others, “This wouldn’t be half as bad if she could actually sing.”
The other girl nodded. “Or if it was just the band.”
The third girl snickered giddily and murmured something about Clay singing at the Miss American pageant and it being more entertaining. All three girls roared with laughter.
Two head banging women in their mid forties turned around and glared. One girl waved cheekily. The other two smiled. The women turned back around.
“So Malcolm,” said Billy, as he pushed the smaller man back against the wall, “You took off quite quickly the other night.” Ryan nodded and ran his finger tips down Billy’s spine. Billy growled. “You know that I had to explain to some random guy why it was that I call your cell so much?”
Ryan grinned a bit and started tugging at the buttons on Billy’s shirt. “So Klippert,” he muttered, distracted, “Got time for a quickie?”
The bad singer kept singing. The scary old women from the Billy Notes board kept head banging. The fan girls kept making snarky comments.
Ryan kept sucking. Billy kept growling.
”Shouldn’t he be out by now?” asked one of the fan girls, completely miffed by the fact that he wasn’t. The first band was finally done playing, and it looked as though they could be setting up for Billy’s band.
Another girl came onto the stage, a guitarist following her. The crowd was hopeful… until she took the microphone and began speaking.
”Hey guys!” she said, waving to the crowd. “Billy will be out soon, we just uh… need to find him!”
The guitarist began to play, and the girl began to sing.
The fan girls turned to look at each other with pointed stares. One raised an eyebrow.
“They can’t find him, eh?”
”I bet you Malcolm showed up and shoved him into the dressing room, looking for a quickie.”
“Hey, I’ve got news for you, Malcolm! That ain’t what you call a quickie!”
The Billy Notes women turned to glare some more. The fan girls giggled in response.
”Ha, so guess what, Ryan?” sauced Billy, as he finished zipping up his pants. “That wasn’t a quickie!”
Ryan, who was exiting the dressing room, began humming Straight Up the Middle in response.
Billy stared for a moment. “Not tonight, not ever!”
Ryan smiled and closed the door behind him.
Two hours late to appear on stage, Billy finally took over the microphone. “How you guys doing? Thanks for coming out to the show! The support is fantastic!” The crowd screamed.
Out of the corner of his eye, Billy noticed Ryan sneaking out the front door. “Hey. Malcolm was supposed to be here tonight. Anyone see Malcolm around?”
Ryan slipped out the door unnoticed, while the crowd searched the balconies above for him.
Later on that night, while Billy was singing Lindsay and the sea of girls were singing along, he could have sworn he heard someone sing ‘Ryan’ instead of ‘Lindsay’. He shook his head and kept singing. There was no way that his fans would know.
The fan girls smirked to themselves. They were singing along to Lindsay as loudly as they could. Only …
“RYAN! Don’t say … you’re going to leave me the way that you found me!”
The Billy Notes women glared even more.
Billy finished signing another autograph and smiled at the next fan. He took the CD cover she wanted signed in one hand, and her shoulder in the other. Amongst the chatter of the crowd, he could hear a few of his fans singing at the back of the line. He grinned for the camera. This publicity would be fantastic. But then …
“Those Billy Notes freaks are getting on my nerves,” grumbled one of the fan girls.
The Billy Notes people had started a pathetic sing-a-long of about five people in a circle, trying to read the lyrics from the cover of Billy’s CD.
The other fan girls stared at them for a moment as well. Of course the old ladies were annoying. There wasn’t much they could do about it… until the fourth member of the fan girls, who had been sulking about his favourite not winning Canadian Idol, started hollering:
“I WANNA DRIVE IT, STRAIGHT UP THE MIDDLE! NOTHING CAN STOP ME NOW!”
Dead quiet.
A cough.
A glare from the Billy Notes following; they responded with singing Lindsay again.
The fan girls began shrieking Ryan’s name whenever the Billy Notes freaks said Lindsay’s.
The Billy Notes crowd switched it up and began singing Life #9.
The fan girls won when they screamed “We are the Kovered in Lies, and we’re coming to get you! … You muthafucka! You’re going to diiiiiiiiiie!”
Silence again. The security guard watched with fascination. The Billy Notes people gawked. The difference this time was that the Billy Notes scaries stopped singing for good.
The fan girls grinned amongst themselves. Mission accomplished.
The picture of Billy was taken right at the moment he opened his mouth with shock. He turned to the representative from Orange. “Uh, can I retake that one?” he asked, trying to be heard over Ryan’s fantasy song about topping.
The man shook his head no. “One picture per person, Klippert.”
Billy was crestfallen. The picture was evidence to his relationship with Ryan, he was sure of it. And if not, it could be Photo Shopped to include lewd objects. This was not fantastic.
Billy pushed Ryan back onto the mattress, covering him with a smattering of well placed kisses.
“You owe me for tonight!” he growled, pressing into him. “And this time, it won’t be a quickie!”
(A/N: As I mentioned at the beginning, some parts were true.
I had the adventure of a life time when I got to go see the 2004 Canadian Idol Finale in Toronto this past September (I was on TV for about 2 seconds, holding a "GO KALAN" sign! Ryan Malcolm really did perform. Billy Klippert really was there. And after the show, as we passed Billy on our way out, I overheard him talking to someone. He said "Wait, you're the guy who answered Ryan's cell phone!"
The music at the Mod Club was just as it was in this fic. The first group was terrible, and my friends and I really did say some of those things. The head banging people from the Billy Notes message board really were head banging in front of us, and yes, they did keep turning around to glare at us.
They really couldn't find Billy, and when Billy came on stage he really did ask where Malcolm was that night.
After the performance and during the autograph session, we really did start singing, as the Billy Notes message boarders couldn't sing and were driving us nuts. We ended up singing Straight Up The Middle, which is a Ryan Malcolm song, as well as Fuck You, You're Dead which is a song by Kovered in Lies, the band that Billy had with his brother. He left when he took a solo career, and we were incredibly upset about this.
I have no idea if the parts about him being off with Ryan are true. It's quite possible!)