Loving the Enemy

Title: Loving the Enemy
Author: kira-nerys
Pairing: Du/Na, K
Rating: Mild R
Summary: What if Tora Naprem hadn't died before Dukat found her?
Disclaimer: Star Trek Deep Space Nine and all its characters belong to Paramount/Viacom. No infringement on their copyright is intended, and I'm making no money from this.
Feedback: Please. kardasi@kardasi.com
Author's Notes: This really is a blast from the past. I wrote this story for Outpost I0 in I999, and it was published in June I999. I figured it was time to post it online now. It's been 3.5 years. The story was lovingly edited aurtuurtured by Laura Taylor. It has been slightly revised from the original version, but not so much.
Website: www.kardasi.com

LOVING THE ENEMY
kira-nerys

Kira's head ached and sweat soaked her whole body. Dukat's uncharacteristically cheerful demeanor made her even more suspicious of his motives. Sure, that man could sound cheerful at any given time, but this was too much, even for him. She sensed his cheer was artificial and barely masking nervousness.

"This heat, it is invigorating, isn't it?" he chattered. She thought about bringing up her phaser and reducing him to inarticulate molecules. She knew she needed him on this mission, however, so she simply clenched her teeth and kept wading through the sands. Although he was dressed in that heavy armor and black clothes, the heat didn't seem to disturb him at all. She wished they had been on some really cold planet instead-like Breen for instance. Just to see him suffer as much as she was would be worth it.

Kira stopped to catch her breath and take a reading from the tricorder. The isotope trail they were following to locate the Ravenok survivors seemed to be stronger now. Wherever they might be, she knew she was on the right track

Ever since Dukat realized whomever he had known on the Ravenok wasn't buried at the crash site, his personality had changed. Kira watched him trying to act normal, but he seemed impatient, uptight and anxious. She had never seen him quite like this. Kira thought back to the scene she had witnessed at the Ravenok. Dukat's relief after he had gone through the gravesite had been so evident. He had expected to find the remains of someone there, but he hadn't and that fact had obviously provoked a strange mixture of feelings inside him. .

XXX

Damn that woman! Dukat thought as he waded through the sands. Damn Kira and her sensibilities! He could just see how her mind was working overtime, seeing his uneasiness. Damn Dozaria, damn the Ravenok and damn the events that brought him here in the first place.

The only thing he couldn't seem to damn was the happiness he felt at not finding two particular bodies. He tried to keep his agitation away, but he knew, as Kira eyed him suspiciously, he wasn't succeeding. He tried to distract her, but even his usual bantering didn't seem to cut through that knowing look on her face.

How much did she know? How much would she find out, and what could he do? From a Cardassian viewpoint there was only one choice, but he knew he was not the Cardassian his family wanted him to be.

"What are you going to do if you find them alive, Dukat?" she asked.

"Who?' he snarled impatiently.

"You tell me."

"There's nothing to tell!"

Kira stopped cold in her tracks. That man was insufferable. "Don't lie to me, Dukat! You definitely knew someone on the Ravenok. Don't give me that nonsense that it was under your command! I know there is something more to it and I won't go any further until you tell me what it is." Kira had seen something in his eyes, something dangerous, and she realized she had to get to the bottom of it before they moved on.

Besides, it was getting dark. "We should find a place to stay for the night," she concluded.

"Why?"

"Because you are going to tell me the truth, and because it's getting damn dark out here!" she responded. "I can't see a thing."

Dukat didn't sound happy about the arrangement but he didn't protest too much. He seemed to understand she was being serious.

XXX

Finally they found a cave and started a fire. It was getting colder and she could see Dukat wasn't as happy about the temperature any more. She couldn't help but revel in that fact. It was his turn to suffer now as she enjoyed the feeling of the cool air against her burnt skin. "So, tell me. Who are you really here to find?"

Dukat sat down beside her. Kira stiffened and pulled away a little; he had a way of getting too close for comfort. He leaned his head against the cave wall before he responded.

"Her name is Tora Naprem," he admitted at last.

"That's a Bajoran name, Dukat. You're here to find a Bajoran?" Whatever she had expected him to say, this wasn't it, and if she remembered correctly.... "There was another Tora on the shuttle. I downloaded the names from the Ravenok's computer. Her name was Ziyal...but that's a Cardassian name...."

He turned his head and looked at her with impatience in his eyes. It was obvious, judging from the irritated look he gave her, he was just waiting for her to put the pieces together, and the truth hit her like a sledgehammer across the head. "I see... " Her voice was astonished. "Tora Naprem was your mistress, and Tora Ziyal.... "

"…is our daughter," he admitted. "Ziyal is my and Naprem's lovely daughter." His eyes turned darker and a smile played at the corners of his mouth.

"Did you love her?" Kira asked although the expression on his face made it rather evident even to her.

"It's rather ironic, isn't it?" he said calmly and looked back at her, obviously just waiting for her to make fun of him, but she didn't.

"Yes it is. The head of the Occupation--in love with a Bajoran. The head of the Occupation--the father of a half-Bajoran daughter. Yes, the Prophets have taken Naprem on a strange path. So you are hoping to find them both alive."

"No," he said, but he didn't sound convinced. "If I find Naprem and Ziyal alive, I will have to send them away again."

"Again?"

"Just like I sent them off to Lessepia."

"Why did you do that in the first place?" Kira asked.

Dukat rose from the ground and started pacing again. The agitation on his grayish features was evident once more. "The Occupation was coming to an end. I saw the inevitable and I couldn't protect them any longer. Naprem had, of course, been labeled a collaborator. There was no place for her either on Bajor or Cardassia. Nobody would welcome her and our haIf-caste daughter on either world. So I sent them away, so they could live out their lives in some sort of peace."

"But the Occupation is over, Dukat. There is no longer any reason for you to send them away "

"I can't bring a Bajoran woman into my life. I can't bring Ziyal to Cardassia!"

Kira stared at him intently. "Maybe you can't take them to Cardassia, or to Bajor. But the universe is endless, Dukat. I am sure there is a place where you can live out your lives together. Why send them away again? Why? It is quite obvious to me you still care for Naprem."

Dukat turned his back to Kira, shielding his face from her curious gaze. Or perhaps he was shielding himself from her reaction? "I love them! I know it is very hard for you to accept that I am even capable of loving someone," he said intensely.

Kira watched his stiff form as he turned around to face her again and those blue eyes pierced into her very soul. "But I am! However, there is one thing you have to remember: I have a family back on Cardassia. I have to think about my other children as well."

Dukat sat by the fire, staring at Kira as she slept. Maybe she was right?

Maybe he owed this to Naprem and Zival? His wife would make sure his other children would never want for anything. There was no one to look after his lost Bajoran family if they were, indeed, still alive.

His heart tightened at the thought of his beloved. He thought about her blond hair and sparkling wit. He thought about their happiness when Ziyal was born. Naprem had brought feelings into his life he never before realized he possessed. Ziyal had been the shining star in his life, the one child who could make him do anything without even having to ask.

At first when he learned the Ravenok might have been found, he had turned numb. At first he had hoped he would find their bodies among those graves, but when he didn't, a huge sense of relief overwhelmed him. Confusion still had a firm hold of him, though. Years ago he had accepted that Naprem and Ziyal were lost to him forever, but now? Now it appeared they both might still be alive. He tried to quench the hope and happiness riswithwithin him, but didn't succeed very well. A smile crept across his lips.

To see them again....

XXX

Daylight came once more and with it the searing heat. Kira and Dukat trudged through the dunes. The fine grit in Kira's boots filtered its way between her toes and ground into the blisters her feet had acquired the day before. She glanced over at Dukat, who for once was quiet. He walked mechanically, focusing only on the way ahead. "We're close now, Dukat. Let's aim for that crest and see whether we can get a visual location on them."

They threw themselves into the sandy hillside and peered over the top. The cave entrance to the camp could be seen approximately 200 meters away. Breen guards, comfortable in their environmental suits, supervised the Bajoran and Cardassian sl in in their faded rags. A sudden sharp intake of breath from Dukat startled Kira.

She pointed her binoculars in the direction of his gaze and saw the reason for his reaction. A thin, delicate Bajoran woman was accepting water from a younger gray-skinned girl whose hair she pushed back in a fond gesture. There was no doubt in Kira's mind it was Tora Naprem and her daughter.

XXX

The sight of Naprem was like a kick in his chest. She was so thin. He would never have imagined her so thin, but there was no doubt in his mind the woman was his Naprem. He'd recognize her gestures and her mannerianywanywhere, despite the dirt that covered her clothes or her tired movements. She hardly resembled the woman who had been his lover for all those years.

Back then she had been voluptuous to the point of plumpness and he had loved every part of her soft, wonderful figure. Her hair had been so blond it seemed as if it was made out of gold. Now she seemed so frail and her hair was gray, like his skin. But that wasn't what pained him most. What pained him most was the haunted look on her features. The ordeals she had been forced to endure for these last six years had not passed unheeded.

He moved the binoculars slightly so he could watch his daughter and his chest tightened even more. She too was thin. He knew she was a young woman, but her appearance was that of a child. How much suffering had they been forced to go through?

Oh, my sweet girls, he thought. If only I had known you were still alive, if only I had known where to find you....

XXX

Kira and Dukat circled the camp to surprise the Breen guarding the cave entrance. They efficiently dispatched the guards and disguised themselves in environmental suits. With the assistance of the miners they were able to overcome the remaining Breen and free the prisoners.

Kira considered how well she and Dukat worked together when they were on the same team. She had forgotten that somewhere along the line, before he had become an officer and prefect, the man had served as a regular soldier. He had the same set of fighting skills she did, but with more discipline. He had moves even a Klingon could admire.

XXX

Naprem looked up at Dukat, her eyes glittering with excitement and exhaustion. "I have lost my mind. After years of hoping, I finally tricked myself into believing you could be here."

"No, no, my love, I am here." Dukat embraced Naprem, gently stroking her hair. She collapsed against him in a faint. He settled to the ground, cradling her fragile body. His face held a touching concern and love for the woman in his arms.

Kira drew a deep breath. She had no idea Dukat was capable of such intense emotions as the ones displayed on his Cardassian features at this moment. His love for Naprem shone from those blue eyes like a torch, and if Kira had ever doubted he was capable of loving someone deeply, there was no longer any doubt.

"Father." The slender black-haired girl Kira had spotted from the hill shyly approached Dukat and Naprem.

"Ziyal, little one, come here," Dukat beckoned as if talking to a young child.

"Mother will be all right in a minute, sometimes when it's too hot she gets like this." Ziyal knelt at Dukat's side with a cup of water.

Naprem stirred, and her eyes locked on Dukat and Ziyal "Am I dreaming?"

"No, Mother. Father has come. You are safe now." Dukat extended an arm toward his daughter, pulling her close until their foreheads touched. He closed his eyes in a gesture Kira could only interpret as gratitude. Does Dukat believe in gods? she wondered. If so, whom was he thanking?

Kira stepped forward, hating to interrupt the family reunion. "Dukat, we need to get above the atmosphere to contact Captain Sisko. I'll head back to the runabout now, you can wait here with everyone else."

Tora Naprem turned her luminous hazel eyes to Kira. "It will be dark soon. Perhaps you should wait."

Dukat looked up and nodded. "Naprem is right. Major, my night vision will allow me to find my way back by morning. I will go."

"Father, please don't leave us," Ziyal breathed, her voice little more than a sad sigh.

The girl's gentle exhortation softened Kira's heart. "We'll all wait until tomorrow I'll start before first light." Her firm tone brooked no contradiction.

XXX

Dukat and Naprem whispered together in the shade of a boulder. Naprem leaned against Dukat's unarmored chest. Occasionally their lips brushed each other's skin. Ziyal sat close, but out of hearing range. Kira wandered over to Ziyal and sat down.

"I'm Kira Nerys."

"Tora Ziyal. Are you a friend of Father's?"

"More like a co-worker."

"Oh. Was he insufferable on the way here?"

Kira laughed, almost snorting, not knowing how to respond to the question.

"I suppose that's one way to put it."

Ziyal smiled. "That's what mother always called him when he was in what she referred to as his 'lecture mode.' Did he talk too much?"

"Not after I ordered him to stop." Kira grinned.

"Good. Then it's really Father."

Ziyal and Kira giggled. "What is all this jocularity, ladies?" Dukat demanded with a twinkle in his eye.

"Nothing!" they both demurred as he gave Ziyal a fierce hug.

"Hmm. Obviously you have been casting aspersions upon my character, an act I will bear in mind for future reference." Dukat kissed his daughter's hand, then held her close, burying his face in her hair.

Kira distanced herself from father and daughter. She gave in to curiosity and walked to where Tora Naprem was resting. Naprem greeted Kira with a welcoming smile and patted the ground next to her. Kira sat on the hard packed earth and surreptitiously took in Naprem's appearance. While she undoubtedly had once been pretty, she was now thin from malnutrition; her filthy blond hair was streaked with gray; and her skin was reddened and heckled. Despite her condition, however, Naprem retained a gracefulness and Kira could see how Dukat had been attracted to her.

"Thank you, Major, for coming to our rescue. I have been so afraid for Ziyal. I do not know what would have become of her if I had died and left her alone in this terrible place. I know it cannot have been easy for you to cooperate with the Cardassians, especially Dukat."

Kira was shocked. Dukat's own mistress was admitting how things must be between him and Bajorans. "Don't be so surprised, Major I love him, but I'm not blind." Naprem smiled at Kira's expression.

Kira didn't know what to say. She understood Dukat would never have fallen in love with a woman who wasn't intelligent. But she was also shocked Naprem admitted to loving Dukat so readily. How could she love a man so cold and cruel, a man who had no conscience?

Naprem coughed and pushed herself up against the cave wall. Her coughing brought Dukat back to them and Kira couldn't help but be touched at the concern she saw in his blue eyes. She knew Dukat loved Naprem and she knew Naprem must have had little choice during the Occupation. Perhaps she only thought she was in love with the Cardassian? Perhaps she had made herself believe this in order to survive? Naprem had caught the prefect's eye and trying to get away from his attention would have been of no use. But no...as she watched Naprem look at Dukat, Kira realized her theory was wrong. Naprem's eyes shone with love whenever they rested on Dukat's features. For whatever reason, her love was real.

"Naprem, oh my sweet Naprem...." Dukat cooed and pulled the woman into his arms without so much as glancing at Kira. She was completely forgotten in this moment. "You're unwell. We cannot delay obtaining medical assistance. I have to get to the runabout and call for backup. But I will return before morning, I promise you that. I will never leave you again!"

Kira watched Naprem's eyes as she hugged Dukat back and the truth suddenly hit Kira. Naprem knew she was terminally ill. Her clearly pleading look at Kira made it evident she needed help in trying to make Dukat understand. Deep down he probably knew already, but to admit this to himself when he had just found her again? Kira understood how that might be very hard, even for a man who had been the cause of so many deaths as Dukat. Perhaps, because of who he was, Naprem's death would be even more difficult

Dukat rose to his feet and called for Ziyal. "Come here, my sweet girl," he beckoned and she came to him. Kira couldn't help but watch. Revealing himself before her eyes was a completely different Dukat than the one she knew. She did not quite know how to react to this.

"Major," he said harshly. "I am leaving the two most important people in your capable hands. I will be back by dawn!"

Kira read between the lines. 'Make sure they are safe' were the words conveyed to her from Dukat's pale eyes, and then he was gone.

XXX

Kira slumped down on the ground beside Naprem. "You really don't like him much, do you Major?" Naprem said faintly. Unbeknownst to herself, she had fallen into Dukat's habit of referring to Kira by her title, rather than her name.

"Call me Nerys," she invited.

"If you will call me Naprem," the older woman responded. "You know, don't you, Nerys?"

Kira nodded. There was no use in trying to avoid the issue by pretending otherwise. "It's Dorian's disease, isn't it?"

"How did you know?"

"I recognize the rash on your throat. My uncle died from Dorian's disease."

"If I remember correctly, when the rash goes around my entire throat my respiratory system will fail," Naprem whispered.

Kira nodded. There was a cure for Dorian's disease, but even without Bashir's help she could tell Naprem's condition was too advanced. She would not benefit from any treatment. It was only a matter of days--a couple of weeks at the most--before the rash would meet above her collarbone.

"So, Dukat must be told immediately," Naprem sighed. "Ziyal will need him more than ever, and he will need her. They will require what time is left to prepare themselves." Naprem spoke half to herself "I wish he had not found me alive. Now he will suffer my death all over again. It is too cruel." A tear made a muddy track through the dust on her cheek.

Kira felt a lump in her throat. Despite the number of times she had wished Dukat would be made to pay for other Bajoran deaths, Naprem's demise would do nothing to help Bajor. The only outcome would be to destroy yet another family and possibly strip Dukat of the only sincere good she had ever seen in the man. As for the repercussions of that, well, may the Prophets protect them all!

XXX

Dukat moved determinedly over the sand dunes, not allowing himself to stop and think even for a brief moment. He would not let himself think about what lay ahead. Deep down in the pit of his stomach was a painful knowledge fighting to get out. He could not let it. The chill in the night air, the darkness and the solitude gave him all the time in the world to think, however, and the knowledge surfaced nonetheless. Naprem was dying. He did not need a doctor to tell him this. Maybe that Starfleet doctor was a miracle worker? Maybe he would be able to save Naprem? Dukat forced thoughts of the other option out of his mind. He had to believe Doctor Bashir would be able to help Naprem or he would not be able to function right now.

XXX

The night brought the cool breeze. The former prisoners rejoiced in being above ground and broke open food supplies to celebrate. Several, Naprem and Ziyal included, bathed in the tepid well water. It was obvious to Kira they were glad to feel some dignity again, despite their tattered clothing. Ziyal untangled her mother's long blonde waves with her fingers. Kira took another good look at mother and daughter. Ziyal was definitely her father's daughter. She had her mother's delicate bone structure, but her father's aristocratic features and mannerisms.

Naprem disengaged from her daughter's grooming and embraced her, catching Kira's eye as she looked over Ziyal's shoulder. "Ziyal, my darling, I must tell you something important. I'm afraid it will upset you, but it can't be helped." Naprem drew along breath and put her arm around Ziyal's waist.

"You know this problem I have when it's very hot?"

"When you faint, you mean?"

Kira looked at Ziyal and realized for the first time that the young girl was no longer a child. She was nineteen, but her manners and appearance were deceiving, and Naprem's voice was soothing as if she was indeed talking to a child.

"Yes, little one. It's getting worse. Soon I won't get better at all." Naprem's eyes were locked on to her daughter's, the look on her face concerned and sad.

"I know. It's the miner's disease. You're dying," Ziyal stated in a soft but matter-of-fact voice.

"Dorian's disease. You know?"

"Of course." Ziyal turned and looked at her mother. "I watched it happen to the others. I just didn't want you to be sad or worry about me, so I didn't say anything. I'm only happy Father arrived in time so you could be together at least for a little while. That's why I didn't want him to leave us tonight. I'm afraid he won't come back soon enough."

"Oh, sweetheart, I have a little more time. We'll see each other again. But when we do, I will have to tell him."

Tears welled in Kira's eyes as she watched the tragic scene between mother and daughter. At that moment, she promised herself to be there for Ziyal once Naprem was gone.

XXX

Dukat landed the turnabout closer to the cave. "Captain Sisko ane Dee Defiant are on their way."

While they waited, Kira could see Naprem was trying to gather the strength to tell Dukat the truth, but when the Defiant arrived, she still hadn't mustered up the courage to do so.

Once the Defiant was there, there was no opportunity to go into such things.

Instead, Kira and Dukat helped get the miners onto one of the shuttles. Doctor Bashir and Dax landed another shuttle and in less than half an hour they had managed to transport all the miners on to the defiant.

Kira watched as Dukat fussed over Naprem, "You have to give her the best treatment you can, Doctorl" he ordered. Doctor Bashir stared irritably at Dukat.

"I always give my patients the best treatment available, now get out of my way!" Bashir demanded. "There are others in more immediate need of my attention. As soon as I have seen to them I will give Naprem my undivided attention."

Dukat had to yield and reluctantly stepped out of Bashir's path, but kept standing there glaring at him, as if to make sure he didn't dwell too long around others before giving Naprem his help.

"Take me back to the station in your runabout," Naprem asked. "I want to be with you." At long last, Dukat nodded and gave in to Bashir's, and Naprem's, wishes. She would not be examined until they were back on the station. The Defiant left and Kira, Dukat, Naprem and Ziyal boarded the runabout to head back to Deep Space Nine.

That was when Naprem finally gathered up the courage to tell Dukat the bad news, that there was nothing to be done about her condition. His reaction to her words was far more violent than Ziyal's had been. Kira realized that even if he knew the truth deep down, hearing it aloud was still something he was not prepared for. Kira sighed. Dukat had always been very good at deluding himself. This time, however, it would not do him any good.

"No, it can't be! I won't allow it!" he hissed. "There has to be something they can do for you, Naprem!" he said and gathered her into his embrace. Her arms swung around his neck and he rocked her as if she were a little child. Kira couldn't help but be touched by the emotions playing in his face. Ziyal was asleep beside Kira, oblivious to her father's pain. "That Starfleet doctor of yours must be able to help Naprem!" Dukat said and stared at Kira.

"Doctor Bashir is a skilled physician, Dukat, but he can' t perform miracles. I am sorry. But Dorian's disease, so far gone--there is nothing he can do." Kira's heart filled with compassion as she watched Dukat's eyes burn with pain and sorrow. He turned his gaze from her and let his eyes rest on Naprem instead. Kira could still see his face and the expression there as he looked at Naprem. His eyes were filled with love, but also with helplessness.

"Don't be sad, Dukat. You will get over this. You and Ziyal will take care of each other and you will go on without me," Naprem whispered weakly.

"But I don't want to go on without you," Dukat said and his voice broke. "I lost you all those years ago only to find you at last, and now I have to lose you all over again? It isn't fair!" His arms clutched around Naprem's thin form and his lips brushed tenderly over her blond hair.

Life isn 't fair. You of all people should know that! Kira thought to herself. The compassion she felt for him moments ago was suddenly all but gone. For all he had done to Bajor and to her people, she shouldn't feel sorry for him. His words made it easier for her to remember the hatred.

Then she lifted her eyes and saw Naprem looking at her. The emotion in her face was a strange one. It was as if she knew exactly what was going on in Kira's mind and it upset her. Kira felt a little guilty, but she didn't understand Naprem. She had been there during the Occupation-she had seen first hand what Dukat did to their people. How could she forgive him so easily? How could she expect Kira to do the same? She thought about this as the runabout took them all back to Deep Space Nine.

XXX

As Kira had feared, there was nothing Doctor Bashir could do for Naprem, whose body slowly but mercilessly shut down more and more each day. Dukat seemed to fade away in sympathy with Naprem's condition. His own slender form became thinner as Naprem' s body became emaciated. The ridges on his face became more prominent and emphasized the hollowness around his eyes. His haunted face told everyone who looked at him he was losing everything near and dear to him. As Kira watched him, she realized Ziyal was the only thing keeping him going now.

XXX

"What is the point?" Naprem asked him soothingly. "There is nothing Doctor Bashir can do for me now. We both know that." Dukat averted his gaze, but Naprem would have none of it. She reached out with her hand and put it on his arm, with surprising firmness. "Do this last thing for me Dukat, my love. I do not wish to stay here, in the Infirmary, withering away. Let me spend my last days with you and Ziyal. Let me share this last time with you by my side. Please."

How could he refuse her? How could he deny her anything, when a mere look into her brown eyes tore his soul apart? Dukat simply nodded and carried her in his arms to his quarters. He didn't even flinch as people stopped on the Promenade to watch him, the former prefect of Bajor, carry the Bajoran woman he loved to his quarters.

XXX

One day, almost a week after they returned from Dozaria, Naprem asked to see Kira. Reluctantly she made her way to Dukat's quarters. Kira had been avoiding Naprem, not knowing what to say or do around the other woman. She felt tom. In her eyes Naprem was a collaborator, but the other woman's fate touched her. She had to admit, she was impressed by the love Dukat and Naprem obviously felt for one another. Against her better judgment, she went to see Naprem.

Kira entered Dukat's quarters as quietly as possible. She stood in the doorway to the bedroom and looked at Naprem lying with her golden hair spread out like a halo against a silk pillow She seemed as small as a child in the luxurious bed. Carefully Kira walked to her bedside and sat down beside her

Naprem smiled gently at Kira and looked at her in silence for a minute. Just at that moment Kira had the sensation of being in the presence of someone holy, or maybe of a kind mother, the type of mother she wished she had known. Kira blinked back the tears that rose to her eyes and swallowed a lump in her throat, trying to appear dignified. This woman is a collaborator, a traitor, she reminded herself. Although Naprem didn't seem to look upon herself as a collaborator, that was what she was to Kira, and to many other Bajorans. Kira knew she shouldn't feel sentimental about her or wish she had known Naprem better.

"Nerys, what is wrong?" Naprem rasped.

"I like you, that's what's wrong. I don't want to like you. You're Dukat's mistress." Kira blurted out and bit her lip. This was not an appropriate way to talk to a dying woman.

"Oh. Well, I didn't love Bajor any less for loving Dukat. Please believe that."

"How can you love him at all?"

Naprem gave a mysterious smile. She whispered, "How could I not? 'We belong to each other, my love and I. In every time and place he holds my heart as I hold his. There is no choice in this matter'."

"Kai Tiru. Does Dukat respect our religion?"

"Dukat respects Kai Tiru because he agrees with the sentiment, Nerys, I am getting tired so I must tell you the reason I asked you to come. I need you to promise me something."

Kira's stomach churned. Here it comes. Whatever it is, I can 't lie, but I can 't say no, she thought.

"Please give me your hand." Kira obliged and winced at how frail the other woman's hand felt in hers. Naprem searched Kira's face until they made eye contact. "Nerys, will you take care of them, my precious family? Will you be a mother to Ziyal and a friend to Dukat? I know I am asking a most difficult thing of you."

Naprem took a deep breath. "Please believe me when I tell you that you don't know Dukat as I do, Nerys. You don't know how hard he tried to alleviate the pain for Bajor. I am not trying to make excuses for him. I know he was responsible for much that happened on Bajor during the Occupation. But believe me when I tell you he took no pleasure in tormenting our people. There were other Cardassians who did. He could not control them all."

Naprem continued, "Dukat is not an easy man to love, but he will be so alone and I am afraid for him." Tears flooded her eyes. "He admires you so. Would you please try to help my daughter become like you? Will you help Dukat be a good father?"

Kira sighed. Ziyal, that sweet, funny young woman who was more like a child, she could take care of her. But Dukat, what to do about Dukat? Be his friend? Naprem had no idea how hard it was for her to promise such a thing. Dukat--the man she had hated more than anyone in the universe her entire life. Dukat--the prefect of Bajor. How could she be his friend? To honor a sacred vow, however, she would at least try. As a spiritual person she had no choice.

"Yes. Naprem. I promise I will take care of Ziyal--and Dukat," she replied, not avoiding Naprem's eyes as the other woman watched her intently.

Satisfied at last, Naprem released her barely present grip on Kira's hand.

"May the Prophets bless you, Nerys." The fragile woman closed her eyes.

"May you walk with the Prophets, Naprem." Kira responded quietly, finally allowing her tears to fall.

Behind her, Kira heard quiet footsteps. Dukat emerged from the doorway. Had he heard it all? She looked at him and compassion overwhelmed her. Maybe she could be his frind after all. He needed support now. He knew Naprem's life would soon end.

"Nerys, would you leave us for a while?" Naprem asked softly. Kira simply nodded, rose, and left them.

XXX

Dukat watched as Kira's lithe form disappeared, leaving them alone. His chest tightened with unshed tears. Once Kira was gone, Naprem held out her arms to him and hugged his neck, whispering in his ear, "Finally, we're alone." She smiled and caressed his face. "You are so serious, where's that old mischief!"

Dukat grasped her hand and kissed the inside of her wrist. "I' m sorry. I don't feel very amusing right now." He knew it would soon be over, and he couldn't bear it.

"Dukat.... Naprem's soft voice called him out of his reverie.

He looked at her and his heart shrank at the thought of his once strong, loved one. Her body was now so thin it hurt to look at her. She seemed so fragile but her grip around his wrist was stronger than he expected. "What is it, my love?" he whispered.

She pulled at his hand. "Come lie down beside me for a while." With surprising haste she slid over against the wall. He stripped his clothes off and climbed onto the bed and settled down beside her. "Hold me," she whispered. He held her.

He wanted--no, he needed to feel her close to him. He knew she was running a fever: her body was too warm, even for a Bajoran. She closed her eyes and stroked his hair, the caresses making his heart tighten even more. How many times had he longed to hold her like this, just once more?

As if she had read his mind, Naprem spoke. "You can't know how many times I wanted to do this. So many times I would escape in my mind to remember this incredible feeling." She opened her eyes to look at him. "Anher her things--I used to imagine how your naked body felt against mine. I would fall asleep pretending you were there and wake still aching for you. Will you please let me feel you against me?"

Dukat looked down at Naprem with a sigh of longing. She pushed even closer, and he felt her frail body against his. She sighed against his ear, sending a shiver down his back, "Dukat. Just to say your name, Dukat."

He hugged her loosely "Naprem, I love you, I love you so much."

"Show me how much. Make love to me."

He nearly cried with sadness and frustration. "How can I? You're so sick, my love, I'll hurt you." Her hand moved from his chest downward and he tensed. "Naprem, what are you doing?" he whispered.

"I want you, Dukat, I want you to make love to me one last time."

"We can't...."

"I understand. I'm too thin now, not much of a woman for you." She smiled ruefully, eyes shiny with unshed tears.

"No, no, that's not it at all." That she could even think so hurt him. "You're still my beautiful Naprem. I still want you, you can't know how much. You're just so fragile, my love, what if I injure you?" He shook his head and grabbed her wrist tenderly and pulled it to his mouth. Softly he kissed the palm of her hand and looked her in the eyes. He saw the warmth and the need there.

"Oh, Naprem...we cannot do t"
"

"Why not, Dukat? We love each other. I love you and I need to feel you close to me. Don't you want it too?"

He felt the unmistakable twinge of arousal at her words. He could not think of himself right now, however; she was too weak. He would hurt her, and he said as much to her once again.

"You will hurt me more if you don't, my love," she said firmly. Tenderly he stroked her too thin body and reveled at the love and devotion he saw in her eyes.

"Are you sure about this, Naprem?" he whispered even as his own need became stronger.

She simply nodded and pulled him into her embrace. "We have so little time left, Dukat. Just once more, I'm begging you, please make love to me one last time." Now her tears slipped from her eyes.

He couldn't stop himself. For six years he had been haunted by dreams of loving Naprem. He had dreamt of their leisurely mornings in bed, exciting hurried couplings before leaving for duty and long romantic nights. Durill tll these years he had never forgotten Naprem, his one true love. Now, hope against hope, she was here shortly, soon to disappear forever.

He leaned over and thoroughly kissed her, probing. They tasted each other like the first time, feeling the moist softness of each other's tongues. He moved slowly, drawing his lips along her throat, blowing across her clavicle, the red rash of her disease a heartrending reminder this moment would never be repeated. He looked back towher her face, his eyes filled with tears, and saw her watching his every move with an expression of anticipation and happiness.

He slipped the gown from her shoulders and kissed her breasts, now no fuller than a girl' s. She responded instantly, but he hesitated, looking up at her face again for reassurance that she really wanted this. Naprem was avidly staring at the manifestation of his own longing. He took this as encouragement and tenderly sucked her breasts.

"Dukat," she moaned while cradling his head against her "Dukat, let me touch you."

He slid up the bed and kissed her again while she fondled him until he was panting her name in her ear, "Naprem, Naprem, Naprem, please."

"Please what, my love?" she whispered, teasing him.

"Please let me inside you." There, he' d asked for the unconscionable. He was an animal. He asked a dying woman to give him her body. He drew away and closed his eyes in shame.

"I want you, Dukat, now and forever. She pushed her nightdress off and pulled him toward her.

They made love slowly, looking deeply into each other's eyes. When he entered her for the last time, tears streaked both their cheeks. Her climax was slow and bittersweet. This was the last time he would feel her rejoicing at his touch, and as he reached his peak, it left him with a feeling of longing, knowing it would never be again.

Afterward Dukat curled up next to Naprem and sobbed like a baby It was the 6rst time he had cried since they were reunited and he discovered the trof hof her disease. "I love you, Naprem. I will always love you," he whispered.

"I know you do, Dukat," she responded. "But please, don't deny yourself happiness in the future. Be ready to take joy whenever it comes along, my love, because it may be brief. You know that as well as I do."

He nodded in agreement, but inside he wondered how he could ever embrace love again. Once she was gone life would have lost its purpose. There would be nothing she could say or do to comfort him so he simply held her, trying to find comfort in her presence, until exhausted, he fell asleep.

XXX

That same afternoon, in the company of Kira Nerys, Tora Ziyal and Gul Dukat, Naprem passed away to join the Prophets at the Celestial Temple. Kira turned her face away in respect for Dukat's tears. He was man enough to cry unashamedly for the woman he had loved so dearly.

XXX

Naprem wariedried on Bajor at the foot of a tree beside a river, near the place where Dukat said Ziyal was conceived. The oldest vedek in Netapka Province conducted the service. Dukat wore a Bajoran mourning robe out of respect for Naprem's faith. Dukat and his daughter clung together and Ziyal wept for the first time as her mother's body was lowered into the earth.

Kira watched Dukat's stony face. It was as if he had cried until he could cry no more. Kira, on the other hand, let her tears fall openly until the service was over when she collected herself and escorted Dukat and Ziyal back to the station, an arouaround each of them. Dukat leaned so heavily on her she worried about him. What was going to happen to him? She had learned that it was not socially acceptable for a Cardassian to embrace his illegitimate child as he had done. His wife had taken his other children and left him. His mother had disowned him. Ziyal was all he had left.

Kira had seen the love in his eyes when he looked at Naprem and the emptiness there now. He could not have done anything differently. "What are you going to do now, Dukat?" she asked him as they reached his quarters back on the station.

He sighed and sat down on one of the couches. Ziyal crept close to him and he absentmindedly pulled his daughter into his embrace. It looked so natural and yet Kira knew such displays of affection among Cardassians were uncommon.

"I really don't know, Major," he admitted tiredly. "These last two weeks have felt like I was living in some kind of vacuum. Waiting for Naprem to pass aand and yet hoping she wouldn't."

Kira simply nodded. She knew what that was like. "Will you stay on the station?"

Dukat laughed bitterly "I could do that if Benjamin would allow it, and then I would be an exile just like Garak. Not welcome back to Cardassia…. Well, it doesn't matter. As long as I have Ziyal with me, nothing else matters."

XXX

The following nights Kira slept on the couch in Dukat's quarters. She dared not leave him alone. The emptiness in his eyes scared her. She was afraid he would do something to hurt himself. He admitted Ziyal's nightmares did not allow him to sleep, making the nights even longer for him to endure, so Kira stayed.

In the middle of the night, Ziyal' s screaming awakened her. She got up from the couch and ran into the young woman's sleeping quarters. Kira pulled her into her arms and rocked her as she wept.

"Oh, Nerys. I want my mother. I want my mother!" she cried.

, Zi, Ziyal. I know. I know...."

"Are you all right, little one?" Dukat's voice reached them from the doorway. He stood there as if he were reluctant to join them. Kira understood why. His hair was in disarray and it was obvious he had gotten out of bed without bothering to dress properly. Kira gasped at the sight of him. He was too thin, as if he hadn't gotten enough to eat in a long time.

"Come here," Kira said softly. "Your daughter needs you." Reluctantly he stepped into the room and sank down on the bed beside Kira. Ziyal's sobs were dissipating.

"Will you both sit here until I fall asleep?" she begged. Kira felt uneasy but could not deny Ziyal what she needed, so she nodded and tucked away a strand of hair hanging in Ziyal's eyes. "Mother always used to do that," Ziyal said and a soft hiss from Dukat reminded Kira he too, was hurting.

"Are you all right?"

Dukat shook his head. "No, but I will be...eventually "

XXX

Difficult days and long nights followed for Dukat and his daughter. He watched in amazement as Kira spent as much time as possible with Ziyal, trying to give him the privacy he needed to come to terms with Naprem's passing. He would be eternally grateful to her for that small favor. It made it possible for him to stay away, to work through all the things he needed to work through. The thoughts, however, seemed to circle around the same question over and over again. What would he do now? Where would he go, and how would he live now that Naprem was gone forever?

XXX

Kira listened patiently as Ziyal told stories of her childhood, of her beautiful, serene mother and her mischievous, passionate father. The stories Ziyal told painted a very different image of Dukat than the one Kira had in her mind. It seemed Dukat and Naprem had led a good life together despite the stressful circumstances. Against all odds they had been happy.

Ziyal's innocent stories told of a couple walking on the edge, balancing their life between the happiness they felt together and the outside forces fighting to tear them apart. She told of a mother who refused to be involved in the politics of the Occupation and of a man who allowed his loved one to stay neutral in a place where neutrality did not exist.

XXX

Dukat kept to himself, rarely leaving his room, never leaving his quarters.

Ziyal tried to comfort her father. Kira found her sitting by his bed on numerous occasions. He accepted her attentions and embraces, but seemed distant. As the days passed, Kira saw little change. Ziyal's grief seemed to dissipate while her worries for her father grew.

Finally Kira decided it was time for her to intervene. A couple of days later she called at Dukat's bedroom door.

"Dukat, it's Nerys, may I please come in?" Hearing no answer, she took a deep breath and walked into the dark room anyway "Dukat?"

He was stretched out on his bed, eyes open, staring at the ceiling. He still didn't answer. She walked to him and shook his bare shoulder. "Dukat, what is going on?" she asked quietly.

He started at the contact as if he hadn't even noticed her presence until she touched him. "I'm just tired. Cold and tired," he sighed.

"Well of course you're cold, you should be under the covers," she chided.

"It didn't seem worth the effort."

Kira's worries grew as she realized Ziyal hadn't overestimated Dukat's unresponsiveness. Ever since the captain had allowed Dukat to remain on the station with his daughter, he hadn't been seen or heard of at all. As she watched him lie there she realized he had lost even more weight. Kira peeled back the bedclothes and pushed his body underneath them before tucking him in securely. He didn't resist, nor did he help. Her heart went out to him.

"Talk to me, Dukat. Please tell me what's going on."

"You know everything. Naprem is gone. I miss her," Dukat's voice was flat

Kira extended her hand reflexively to stroke his face in a comforting gesture. For the first time his gaze met hers and she saw puzzlement there. Apart from the occasional flashes of love when he looked at Ziyal this was the first emotion she had seen in his eyes since Naprem died.

"I know how you feel, Dukat. I lost Bareil and it was hard for me to go on, but I did. You have Ziyal to think about. You are scaring her. She needs you to be strong now, to be with her. It's not easy for her outside your quarters among full-blooded Bajorans and Cardassians."

"I know," he whispered. "I don't know what to do. Naprem always knew. She was the wisest person I ever met. How she could ever have wanted me...."

"Stopi t! She didn't just want you—she loved yout! And if she was so wise, she must have had some mighty good reasons." Kira was shocked to hear herself and she paused for a moment before continuing. "Now, since she left me in charge, I'm inclined to believe in her wisdom."

"You've done more than enough. You made a promise under duress. I will not hold you to it, although if you could make room in your heart for my daughter I would be grateful."

"I keep my promises. I promised to look after you. Now, starting this moment, you are no longer to keep to yourself twenty-six hours a day. I want to see you at breakfast and I expect you to eat something."

"I will," he responded with some of his old spirit showing in his eyes.

"So, are you warm enough? Should I adjust the environmental controls? Do you want another blanket?"

"Yes, no, no, thank you." Dukat almost laughed at Kira's bustliboutbout.

She had to smile back. The slight spark of life in Dukat's eyes made her warm inside. "Then good night. If you need anything at all, call me." On a bizarre impulse, Kira swooped down and kissed Dukat on the forehead. His shocked expression made her chuckle as she left his bedroom.

END