Only For You

Title: Only For You
Author: Abraxisdragon Feedback: abraxisdragon@cox.net
Rating: NC-17 Pairing: MUSpock/MUKirk
Warnings: Bondage, Semi-non-consensual sex, curse words. Also, a knowledge of the episode “Mirror, Mirror” is necessary.
Disclaimer: I own the plot continuation. The rest belongs to Paramount. My only profit is self-satisfaction.
My heartfelt appreciation to my beta Lovin’JamesT

Spock, First Officer of the I. S. S. Enterprise, watched as the doppelganger disappeared in the shimmer of the transporter wave and his own captain materialized in his place. He had considered the plea that the alternate Jim Kirk had made to him to be the ‘one man’ to start the ‘revolution’ to end the Empire’s reign of terror, correlated it with the mandate for the Empire’s destruction from the Vulcan High Council (something the alternate had been unaware of) and made his decision. He greeted his returning Captain with a drawn phaser. The instant the transport was complete he fired. As Kirk slumped to the deck, Spock targeted Scott, Uhura and finally McCoy.

He then turned his attention to Lt. Moreau. He was pleased to find her, if considerably shaken, still quite in control of herself. He chose to overlook the fact that her voice quavered slightly when she spoke. Her attitude and her words were satisfactory.

"What are your orders, Captain?"

"You may return to your duties or the Captain's quarters as you choose. I will contact you later to discuss our future association. You will speak of this to no one."

"Yes, Sir. Understood, Sir."

Spock exchanged salutes with her and watched her exit the room. His estimation of her abilities and worth was increased by her facade of normalcy; not an easy thing for a human, considering the recent events. He then turned back to study the four bodies lying on the transporter pad. The first step of his plan was completed. It had been the simplest to take. Those following it would be much more distasteful and, in the matter of Kirk, much more difficult. Crossing to the pad, he moved the bodies until only Kirk's remained on the pad. Returning to the control console, he transported Kirk to the private interrogation room attached to the First Officer's quarters. Then, steeling himself to deal with the savage and disorderly states of their minds, he knelt in turn by each of the other three and blanked their memories of the few seconds of his attack.

With McCoy, Spock did more. He spent an extended time in his meld with the doctor, carefully sifting his memories and comparing them with those of his doppelganger. This was not only a fascinating study in the effects of environment on inborn nature but could also be useful in his plans for dealing with Kirk. It would have been much more useful if he had had the opportunity to probe the alternate Kirk's mind but the alternate McCoy had been very familiar with his Kirk and Spock. That knowledge plus the comparison of the two McCoys should be sufficient for his purposes. Spock was well satisfied by the time he stood and stepped away from the unconscious trio. Using his private communicator, he contacted two of his personal operatives in Security and ordered them to the transporter room.

"Stand guard over these officers, protect them, until they return to consciousness. Inform them that a transporter malfunction caused their condition, that the captain has already recovered and that his orders to them are to return to their normal duties but to speak to no one, not even each other, about anything that occurred since their visit to the planet. Warn them that he has ordered the Agonizer Booth for anyone who does."

His orders delivered, Spock exited the transporter room without further explanation. His men, even the humans, had been well trained. Any questions they might have would remain their own private thoughts. However, there would be others with questions. He would have forty-eight hours at most before being forced to decide which of his options should be exercised; forty-eight hours to decide if Kirk would live or die.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kirk was awake. The face of the unconscious Kirk had borne a great resemblance to his counterpart. This snarling animal, that now confronted Spock, did not. Spock was sorely tempted to kill Kirk immediately and spare himself the ordeal that attempting to salvage the man would be. However, Kirk was potentially an extremely valuable asset and the Vulcan High Council would not sanction his allowing personal distaste to out-weigh that. Spock remained silent and waited patiently while Kirk fought his restraints, screamed his threats, offered bribes for his freedom, vented his anger and fear sufficiently and became calmly resigned.

"So, this is it then. All the bullshit about you not wanting command was a lie. You were just waiting for something that would give you Command's backing, weren't you? And that pansy-assed double of mine gave it to you. But this? God! I thought you, of all of them, would give it to me clean. … I guess I was wrong. … Would the codes to all my accounts and investments at least buy me an easy death?"

Spock studied this offer. It could be used for his purpose. He would test Kirk. Should Kirk react incorrectly, he would have justification, even to the High Council, for ending this now.

"I will offer you a choice, Captain. Your credits can buy your easy death ... or the safety of your mother, nephew and ... the boy, David."

Spock had never seen his captain turn so pasty white before; not even when he had bled out almost past McCoy's ability to save him.

"How did you know about….? Fuck! You must really hate me. All right, have your fun with me, but leave them alone! Only….. Look, you're getting a god-damned fortune. Let it buy me just a little more. I don't trust his mother -- David's mother. Without her fear of me … without the money I’m sending her, she’ll run out on him. If I'm buying his safety, promise me you'll kill the bitch and see that he's given to my mother."

So, Kirk did have some remnant of morality remaining.

"Agreed. Give me the numbers."

The color began to return to Kirk's face and he sighed in relief.

"You may have an infallible memory. Sp. Spock, but I don't. I use ... used a broker. In the safe in my quarters you will find a letter to be delivered to my mother ... in case of my death. The number of words in the first sentence of each paragraph, taken in reverse order, is the registry number of a bank in Geneva, New Switzerland. The number of words in the second sentences, not reversed, will give you the lock-box number. The number of sentences in each paragraph, reversed, will give you the entry code. All the information you'll need for withdrawals is there."

"You realize, if you have lied to me, I will kill them all?"

"Yes, you cock... !" Then Kirk forced his voice into a calmer tone. "Yes … I know. It's all there, even the trusts for the boys. Now, get on with ... with whatever you have planned for me."

Spock found it fascinating that, though Kirk believed Spock intended to torture him to death, he still trusted Spock to keep his word concerning the lives of Kirk's family. It was a small thing, but it encouraged Spock to raise, if only slightly, the pitifully small probability of a positive outcome for Kirk.

"Though you may disagree, Captain, what I have planned for you is not intended as torture."

Spock moved to the side of the horizontal X-frame on which Kirk lay restrained. Grasping Kirk's chin firmly with one hand he reached for the meld points with the other. When he realized what Spock intended, a guttural scream escaped Kirk, "No!!", and he surged frantically against his bonds. Even though the straps were padded, Spock was certain Kirk would have deep bruises, if not bleeding abrasions, on his wrists and ankles. Humans were so easily injured. But, as Spock forced the meld, Kirk's mental resistance was much stronger than Spock had believed any human was capable of, even the indomitable Captain of the Enterprise. It also quickly took on the form of attack. While this was futile against Spock's stronger mind, he found the attempt admirable. In fact, as Spock forced himself deeper and deeper into Kirk's mind, he found the contact less odious than he had thought it would be. Kirk was not yet the total cutthroat, immoral bastard he portrayed himself to be -- almost but not quite. When Spock reached the point where further invasion would permanently damage Kirk, he withdrew slightly and offered Kirk another choice.

// Submit to me. Accept what I wish to show you. Or perish.
S
Spock felt the increase in resistance before he heard the snarled, "no". He selectively targeted areas of Kirk's mind with agonizing pulses.

//Submit.//

Kirk’s mind surged and writhed beneath the vicious attack. He was on the sharp edge of breaking but still struggling as he moaned, "I can't!"

Spock saw the truth of this and applied soothing touches to the points he had just tortured -- much as he would have calmed any wild beast in training. As he felt Kirk relax into the relief and then pleasure of it, Spock altered the wor of of his demand.

//If I invade no further, will you cease resistance to my thoughts?//

A weary sigh, "I'll try."

It was sufficient.

//Focus on the memories of your time in the other universe.//

As Kirk scanned through his experiences, Spock began laying images of the other Kirk along side of them. When Kirk's memories left him sitting in the brig, filled with frustration and helpless, ss, he began to focus intently on the images Spock was offering. His interest intensified as Spock presented the scene of the fight in Sickbay. Spock ended the presentation of memories with his injury and subsequent unconsciousness. Kirk began speaking almost immediately.

"I thought he was weak but he wasn't, was he? None of them were. They could have survived here just fine. Fuck, even his McCoy had the balls to go at you! ... And they worked together; backed his play without even thinking about it. But why? What gives him that kind of control over them?"

This was the question Spock had sought to evoke from Kirk. He began presenting parallel memories of the McCoys -- emphasizing their differing views, attitudes and emotions concerning their respective Kirks; the differing manner in which each Kirk treated his McCoy; the alternate McCoy's years of devoted friendship for his Kirk; his reluctant but inevitable acceptance of and friendship for his Spock as the value of the Kirk/Spock association became apparent to him; and, finally, the alternate McCoy’s memories of the very deep relationship between that Kirk and Spock. The last images Spock presented to Kirk were the alternate McCoy's memories of what occurred in Sickbay while Spock was unconscious and seriously injured -- of their transference of their affection for their Spock to him at least sufficiently to save his life.

As soon as theges ges ceased, Kirk's mind swarmed with conflicting thoughts and emotions. Spock withdrew from the meld and moved a short distance away from Kirk as much for his own comfort as to give Kirk the time to absorb the information he had been given. As Spock ordered his own mental processes, he found he also had a great deal of information to process. Though Kirk’s undisciplined mind couldn’t even ‘thought speak’ without accompanying vocalizations, his intelligence was of a high order and the odd, intuitive shortcuts in his logic patterns were amazing. Kirk was indeed worth salvaging. However, he was too strong-willed and his savage self-interest too ingrained for this single event to make a lasting change in him. Even if Kirk were to honestly agree to Spock’s proposal, his continued moral evolution and future fidelity were very doubtful. To insure both, Spock needed a way to monitor and control Kirk at all times.

Spock had not considered this necessity before because, quite honestly, he had not believed Kirk would prove salvageable. There was, of course, only one possible solution; one he initially found so disturbing that it actually broke his concentration. Reinforcing his calm, Spoontiontinued to stare at Kirk. An image from the alternate McCoy’s memory of his Kirk and Spock sharing a meld did provide some proof that it might succeed. Spock’s duty to the High Council required that he offer it to Kirk. Kirk's decision to accept or reject it would determine his fate. With the matter settled, Spock continued to study Kirk while exploring the possibility from a more personal viewpoint.

That Kirk was male, was a positive. Spock had never been attracted to a female of any species; well, with the possible exception of Uhura -- but he pushed that thought aside as irrelevant. Nor was Spock being male a problem for Kirk. Even though he as tos took a female for his 'woman', Kirk was not particular about the sex or the species of his sexual conquests. Kirk was quite strong and resilient, for a human -- a definite necessity. His mind had been interesting and, yes, compatible in many ways once he had ceased resisting. The unpleasant aspects of his personality would decrease with the training necessary to render him trustworthy. Lastly, while physical attractiveness was not a requirement, Spock was surprised to discover that he found Kirk's strong, well-formed body and alien coloring very much to his liking.

This would certainly not fit Sarek's plans for his son's life. However, such a bucolic existence – mate, offspring, and managing the family land holdings -- had not appealed to Spock from the first. Having spent the majority of his life sacrificing his own desires to his duty to both family and Vulcan, it seemed to Spock that this auspicious turn of events must be due to some unknown natural law of equitable return.

"Why have you shown me all this?"

Spock moved his attention up Kirk’s body to his face. The changeable hazel eyes were hard -- but there was pain and doubt in them as well as anger. Spock decided that the odds for success were improving, even with the additional variable of the necessary bonding. He moved close to Kirk and placed his fingers on the meld points once more. Kirk offered no resistance. To the contrary, he had adapted to the alien experience of melding very well and was anxious for Spock to answer his question. Kirk was a survivor. Offer him a price he could pay and he would choose life – and the chance to escape and take his revenge. Spock gave him the memory of the final conversation with the other Kirk and then ended the meld again. As Spock had expected, Kirk reacted badly.

"The fucking optimist! You should have kept him, Spock. The two of you would have made good company for each other in the Booth."

“You will not consider it?”

"Consider what? That the two of us take on the Empire? I'd rather take whatever you can think up than face the Imperial Interrogators.” Then Kirk, the cunning manipulator, returned. “Look, can't I talk you out of this? I ... After what you've shown me, I can understand why you ... Hell who wouldn't want their universe. You find a way to get us back there and I'll be the first on the transporter pad. But this! It's impossible! Come on, Spock. You’re too good a First Officer to lose. I can forget this. We can go on just like before."

“No, it is not impossible. I have already formulated an argument that may convince the Halkans to save themselves. If they do not, it will be another evil that must be accepted for the present so that the future may change. Also, the goal is not to openly defy the Empire. It is only necessary to hasten its already predictable demise. Nor will we be alone. There are others, a great many others, already actively working toward that goal. While the Enterprise is too valuable a prize for me not to take her now that my actions will not be questioned, the Enterprise with her Captain would be a much greater prize. I offer you a chance to survive now and also to survive the inevitable demise of the Empire.”

Kirk's agile mind, fueled by self-interest, began dealing with tactics rather than emotions. "What about the crew? All those ‘others’ won’t help us a damn bit if we can’t control the crew."

"All those pledged to me are trustworthy. Those supposedly loyal to you will require some culling but there are others that would support you in this, if they were convinced of your sincerity. As for the rest, any who present a real danger can be eliminated or transferred and replaced with those we trust."

"Sulu?"

"Has already eliminated himself. During your absence he attempted and failed to assassinate your double and allow me to die in Sickbay, offences punishable by death."

Kirk became silent and remained so for a considerable time. When he finally spoke, his tone had toughened once more.

"So, I just say, 'yeah, ok, sign me up' and then you turn me loose? I don't think so. What's the catch, Spock?"

Now that the moment had finally arrived, Spock felt an odd reluctance to take this final step. He had allowed himself to form a personal preference in the matter. Should Kirk refuse the meld, killing him would now be another ssarssary evil to be added to Spock’s growing list. Spock viciously suppressed this weakness.

"You are correct. It is necessary to ensure that you will remain 'signed up'. I must be able to monitor your commitment whenever I choose. I will require you to bond with me -- fully and permanently."

Kirk's expression began with totally astonished, moved to terrified and ended in defiance.

"No. I'd rather die now. I saw the medical reports on your last bondmate. You damn near killed him and he was Vulcan."

Spock berated himself for not anticipating this question and then steeled himself to make the revealing explanation.

"That was ... the madness, the Pon Farr. During that time, a Vulcan male must mate or die. All control is stripped from us. It was my first and was further complicated when the mate chosen for me by my family refused me. Sernoc volunteered to make a temporary bond to save my life. Pon Farr occurs only every seven years, each subsequent Pon Farr is less violent and a permanent bond controls the violence better than a temporary one. If I were certain you would provide me the sexual gratification necessary, I would further protect you by allowing myself to be restrained, much as you are now."

Kirk took a few moments to consider this, then a subtle but definite leer curled his lips.

"What about in between? As far as I know, in all your time aboard the Enterprise you've taken only the onver ver and him only that one time. You know I'm not the celibate type. As interesting as humping a Vulcan might be – and I’ll admit I’ve thought about it -- I won’t settle for being your boy-toy once every seven years and a eunuch the rest of the time. Will I be allowed to fuck around on you -- or do you intend to satisfy my needs as well as you expect me to satisfy yours?"

Kirk's voice was full of challenge and quite insulting. Spock found this irritating. If he lived, Kirk would always be Spock’s ‘Captain’ anywhere they were -- except in their private quarters. There, Spock would dominate. It was time Kirk learned this. Stepping forward to loom ominously over Kirk, Spock drew his dagger and placed the point of it against the bare skin of Kirk’s chest at the vee of his crossover tunic. At the first sight of the blade, Kirk uttered a startled gasp and froze. Spock ignored him. With a twitch of the dagger, he nicked the smooth, rose-gold skin and watched as a droplet of red blood welled up. Fascinated, he dipped his head and tasted it. Kirk shuddered at the touch of the feline-rough Vulcan tongue. Both Kirk’s reaction and the taste of his blood pleased Spock. With swift, deft motions of his dagger, Spock shredded both tunic and trousers, stripping Kirk naked. Ignoring both Kirk’s relieved grunt as the dagger was sheathed, and angry hiss at the first touch of the Vulcan’s hand, Spock began a leisurely but tugh ugh exploration of the human’s body.

Lush … there was simply no other word for the human. The extra layer of fat beneath the skin gave it a softness beyond even that of a female Vulcan. The sweat, such an extravagant waste of fluid, gave it a beautiful glow. The broad flat planes of the muscles were an erotic contrast to the wiry roping of his own musculature. And so sensitive; such an abundance of nerve endings; so many erogenous zones. Long before Spock had completed his explorations, Kirk’s silent resistance had turned to hisses and groans of pleasure. Spock began to concentrate on the most sensitive areas, using his lips, tongue and teeth in addition to his hands: tawny aureoles and nipples that pebbled tightly; belly and navel that rolled and pursed like a tiny mouth; inner thighs, quivers that ran clear to Kirk’s toes; vulnerable external testes, tightening until they were a creped texture that Spock was loath to leave; curly, coarse pubic hair, intent on its own mating with Spock’s beard and mustache; finally, the proud proof of Kirk’s manhood.

The always-exposed head strained upward, mauve with desire. The column beneath its exotic single ridge pulsed. Drops of pre-cum glistened invitingly. As Spock’s tongue snaked over the head, collecting them, Kirk’s hips flexed and he cried out.

“Yes! Oh fuck, yes! Suck it!”

As appealing as this suggestion was to Spock, Kirk would need to earn the right to make such requests. Straightening, he finished Kirk with his hand, taking great enjoyment from Kirk’s guttural screams and the sight of his cum splashing across his belly. Then, dipping his fingers into the cum, Spock tasted it – savoring the bitter tang of the salts of the distant seas that spawned the human’s kind – then lowered the fingers to Kirk’s anus to prepare it for the penetration that would not only pleasure Spock but would also be Kirk’s first lesson in the service that would be required of him.

As the first finger touched his anus, Kirk began to struggle violently. His expression of relaxed satiation twisted into a mix of many emotions – all negative. Fearing Kirk might injure himself, Spock moved from between his thighs to stand at his side, intending to calm him through a meld. However, this action calmed Kirk sufficiently and Spock spoke to him instead.

“Fool! I not only make an unprecedented effort to save your life but ofyou you honorable bonding; an alliance with the richest, most powerful House on Vulcan and you return this with baiting insults! And now hysteria! I have answered your question concerning my sexual prowess and I intend to test yours. You will remember the cost of your insolence!”

“God, Spock, I’ll do anything you want. But … not this! … not this way!”

Kirk’s plea was anguished, fearful and without one hint of arrogance or pride. Spock melded with him now, seeking the reasons for this. The images he found were disgusting in their brutality. The boy-Kirk; chained, tortured, violated savagely; then leashed, dressed and painted like a whore, and passed from abuser to abuser as an after-dinner entertainment. The words Kronos and genocide identified the events. It sickened and angered Spock.

//I would find that no more pleasurable than you would! A submissive role, yes, but only in our private life … and never that!//

Kirk was astonished by Spock’s empathy to his younger self and anger toward his persecutors. Spock felt a tenuous trust begin to form.

“Then, what?”

//Mutual respect at the least … and perhaps … in time … //

Spock showed him the image of their alternates, melded, their faces reflecting the quiet ecstasy each found in the other. After a long silence Kirk’s recamecame in a soft whisper.

“Oh, fuck, Spock. You really are going for miracles. You can’t believe…. Besides, it’s a good bet the Empire will kill us both long before either of us has a chance to become that attached.” Then with a sharp chuckle, “Oh, hell…. All right, I’ll submit to the bond … submit to you.”

This was the truth, at least for the present. Withdrawing from the meld, Spock unstrapped Kirk and motioned him to follow as they exited the interrogation chamber and crossed Spock’s quarters. Once in the sleeping chamber, Spock motioned Kirk toward the bath, “Clean yourself and use the gel in the blue jar to prepare yourself for me,” then stripped, arranged the cushions on his bed and lay down on his back in a semi-reclining position. Only as Kirk returned from the bath did Spock allow his penis the arousal it had been demanding for quite some time. Fully engorged, it was as thick and almost two inches longer than Kirk’s ample organ. As he watched this process, Kirk seemed on the point of rebellion once again.

“You may use your mouth and your hands to begin.”

This reprieve seemed trentrengthen Kirk’s resolve. Crawling across the bed to kneel beside Spock, he began to caress him, tentatively. Kirk seemed as intrigued by the Vulcan’s organ as Spock had been with the human’s. His caresses focused on it: the double ridges, the heavier veining and the deeper, more prominent slit in the slightly conical head. Then, his curiosity seemingly satisfied, Kirk lowered his head and began licking and sucking quite avidly. But, when he slipped his hand between Spock’s legs, Kirk’s head jerked up and he shot Spock a questioning look.

“They are internal. You will learn those touches, and others, later.”

With a shrug, Kirk resumed the fellacio with such vigor that it was obvious he intended to finish Spock in this manner; hopefully delaying his own penetration as long as possible. Kirk’s ministrations were extremely pleasant and Spock could have allowed himself to climax from them. However, this was not what he desired for their bonding. In consideration of the human’s stamina, he allowed it to continue for only a brief time before leaning forward to grasp Kirk’s torso, lift him and position him to kneel astride his body facing him. As his penis prodded the human’s ass, Spock reestablished the meld.

//I will be patient. When you are fully seated, we will bond.//

Through the meld, Spock aided Kirk; soothing any pain and increasing his ability to relax his muscles. When Kirk was finally seated heavily in his lap, Spock wove a fine silver thread between the cores of their minds. With Sernoc this had been the end of it, with Kirk it was the beginning. With small movements of his hips, Spock urged Kirk into the first rocking motions of their coupling; feeding him the wonderful sensations he was evoking in Spock. To experience the pleasure he gave as fully as the pleasure he took was a totally unique experience for Kirk. His crude but concise thought, //Being fucked is to fuck and fng ing is to be fucked//, amused Spock.

Then, very quickly, they were caught in a continuous loop of feedback that evolved, building in intensity, until each was so deeply buried within the mind of the other that nothing existed for either but the other. The silver thread, so tenuous a beginning, strengthened and thickened into an unbreakable cable that would stretch to eternity without weakening. When the limits of endurance were reached, Vulcan and human climaxed as one, then folded into one another in an entwined heap.

As sleep began to creep over them, Spock felt Kirk’s lips searching for his. Allowing the kiss, he savored his bondmate’s pleasure in it.

//But Vulcans don’t …?//

//For you, Kin-kur; my Golden. Only for you.//