Nightmares

Sara charged through the hospital doors and ran down the hall until Catherine called her. She stopped and turned, her heart pounding. She looked around not wanting to stand here when Greg needed her.

“What, Catherine?” Sara asked impatiently. “I have to get to Greg.”

Catherine shook her head and led her into the waiting room.

“We have to wait, Sara,” she said softly. “They probably took him into surgery by now.”

Sara sat on the plush gray chair, her legs giving out. She placed her head in her hands as a sob escaped her.

How could I let this happen? She thought. Why didn’t I just tell him?

She felt a hand on her shoulder and looked up to see Catherine.

“I asked the receptionist about Greg. They’re working on him now.”

Sara nodded and wiped the tears from her eyes.

“I should have told him about my nightmares,” she said between sobs. “Maybe then we wouldn’t be here.”

By the silence from Catherine, she knew the other woman agreed. The fact only made her feel worse.

“I don’t want to lose him,” she whispered.

Catherine gathered Sara in her arms and stroked her hair. Hot tears flowed down her cheeks and she did nothing to stop them.

“You’re not going to lose Greg, Sara. He loved you too much to leave you alone.”

“Then why did he go to a hotel? Why did he do this?”

“I don’t know, Sara. He was concerned about you and your nightmares. Every time I saw him, he looked worse. He kept saying he was fine.”

“He wasn’t fine,” Sara whispered as she sat back in her chair. “I was so wrapped up in protecting him, I didn’t see what it was doing to him.”

She wiped away the tears as the worry and fear set in. It twisted her stomach into a knot and she wondered if the feeling would ever go away.

“I want him back,” she whispered, staring at the floor. “If I can have Greg back, I’ll never hurt him again.”

“You’ll get him back, Sara.”


~*~


Sara paced the floor thirty minutes later. The waiting set her nerves on edge and she wanted to scream. She shoved her hands into her hair and tightly closed her eyes.

“Sara?” Catherine’s voice caught her attention.

She glanced at the older woman, who appeared calm and relaxed. She envied Catherine at that moment.

“You need to calm down before you go insane.”

“I’m scared, Cath.”

“I know, but going crazy isn’t going to make the surgery go any faster.”

Sara sighed and sat beside Catherine. She closed her eyes and wished she could see Greg now. She wished she could be with him, tell him she loved him. Tell him she was sorry for hurting him, for putting him here.

“I can’t take this waiting,” she whispered, itching to start pacing again.

She heard footsteps to her left and she turned to see Nick heading toward them. She stood as the knot in her stomach tightened. She saw the expression in Nick’s eyes and it caused tears to form in her eyes.

“Catherine called,” he said when he came up to them. “What the hell happened?”

Sara stared at the floor as guilt caused her throat to close. She could barely breathe and she sat before her legs gave out.

“He tried to kill himself,” she whispered.

“Damn,” Nick said softly as he sat beside her. “I didn’t think he would do something like that.”

“Neither did I,” she said as she ran a hand through her hair. “I don’t know why.”

Nick stared at her, shaking his head. She glanced at him, confused.

“What?”

“You should have let him help you,” he said, his voice harsh. “He was worried about you and you pushed him away.”

Sara glared at him. She felt guilty enough without Nick adding to it.

“I told you why I couldn’t tell him.”

“And look where it got him.”

“Stop it,” Sara hissed. “I feel bad enough already.”

“Both of you stop it,” Catherine said as she glared at them.

Sara closed her eyes as nausea set in. She didn’t think she could take much more if she didn’t hear something soon.


~*~


Thirty minutes later, Sara sipped coffee from a Styrofoam cup. The warm liquid eased her nerves, but did little to warm her. She sighed softly and closed her eyes, wishing for news of any kind. She felt herself slowly slipping into insanity.

“Sara,” Catherine’s voice invaded her thoughts.

She opened her eyes as a doctor came toward them. She stood as her heart pounded in her chest. She placed her cup on a nearby table before she dropped it.

“You here for Greg Sanders?” The doctor asked.

“Yes,” Catherine said calmly.

“I’m Dr. Tyler. It was touch and go through the surgery, but he made it. A couple more inches and he’d be dead.”

Sara sat in the chair as relief washed over her. Greg was alive and that was all that mattered.

“Can we see him?” She asked.

“He’s in no condition to see anyone right now,” the doctor said. “He’s going to be placed on a seventy-two hour suicide watch. I’m also going to have a psychiatrist come in and talk with him once he wakes up.”

“I want to see Greg,” Sara said, standing. She wanted to see for herself that he was all right.

“Sara,” Nick said softly. “Greg can’t see anyone right now.”

She shook her head as she stared at the doctor. She wasn’t going to let anyone keep her from Greg. Not now, not ever.

Dr. Tyler sighed, giving in, “Follow me.”

She hurried after the doctor, her heart in her throat. Her stomach tied itself in knots as she was led down the hall. With each step, her legs threatened to give out, but she forced them on.

“Five minutes,” the doctor said when they arrived. “He won’t be much for conversation, though.”

“I just want to see him.”

Dr. Tyler nodded and opened the door. Sara stepped inside and the door shut behind her. She barely noticed how small the room was, her main focus on Greg. She held her breath as she made her way to the bed.

“Greg,” she whispered as she glanced at him.

He laid silently on the bed, his right arm draped over his stomach. An IV tube dripped what she believed to be pain killers into his arm.

The heart monitor beeped on the other side of the bed. If it wasn’t for it, she wouldn’t know if he was alive or not. His chest barely rose and fell. His skin was deathly pale, giving rise to her fear.

“Greg,” she whispered, her throat tightening.

Black spots appeared before her eyes and her head spun. She tried to blink the spots away, but she felt herself falling.

Darkness took over before she hit the floor.