Dreams of Exsistence

Chapter Nine
It had been almost two weeks since Hoshi started having nightmares about their daughter. Every night, the same nightmare would ensnare her. She would tremble in Malcolm’s arms and sob herself back to sleep. Malcolm tried to soothe Hoshi as best he could, but the truth of the matter was that Starfleet had not changed its position regarding their daughter. They would not be able to return to Earth to raise their daughtor aor anywhere else for that matter. That fact, in itself, overshadowed the joys of expecting one’s first child.

Malcolm wasn’t even sure how he felt about fatherhood. After all, his childhood was not one he cared to recall. He held no resentment toward their daughter, but still had reservations regarding her conception and her mother’s pregnancy. He could understand Starfleet Command’s stance. The situation still aroused his protective instinct. On the other hand, he could not squelch his growing love and desire for Hoshi. He knew he loved her and would go to any length to protect her. His fear for her well-being and happiness filled him with dread.

The previous day Captain Archer had approached Malcolm to deliver more bad news. They would be unable to stall with Starfleet Command any longer without serious ramifications. Archer had told him that Admiral Forrest had gone to bat for them, but that he was no longer able to hold off the contingent of Starfleet brass that were hell bent on treating their daughter as a potential hostile first contact scenario. Medical and security details were en route to their position.

Archer had paused, putting a hand on his tactical officer’s shoulder. An ominous dread filled Malcolm at the gesture. “In treating the baby as a hostile first contact, your and Hoshi’s parental rights will not be acknowledged. Upon her birth, your and Hoshi’s rights to her will be terminated.”

The words reverberated through Malcolm’s mind as he walked down the corridor. He knew he would never be able to tell this news to Hoshi. He had never felt as helpless as he did now. He wanted to protect her from what lay ahead - the pain and agony… His frustration mounted at his helplessness. He wondered if Hoshi would ever be able to forgive him for his helplessness.

Hoshi was due to deliver any day now, or any minute seeing as Phlox had never been able to gauge the actual gestational rate of their daughter. Hoshi never complained, even though Malcolm knew she was uncomfortable. He marveled at placing his hand on her belly and feeling the movements of their daughter. At those times, he felt at peace with the world, filled with limitless possibilities. He would feel happiness in its purest form, and then have to catch himself before he was sucked into the illusion of a happy ending. However everything ended, he hoped… well, he still had hope.

**

Hoshi sat straight up in bed with a gasp, her arms clenching her stomach. Malcolm reached out to calm her. After all, that was the drill with the nightmares. She groaned and rolled into the fetal position. “Oh my God!”

Malcolm grabbed Hoshi on her hip thinking she was still in the throes of her nightmare and felt wetness.

“Malcolm, it’s time. My water just broke.” Hoshi grimaced.

Malcolm jolted out of bed and hit the comm. panel. “Reed to sickbay,” he barked.

“Sickbay here,” Phlox answered.

“It’s time! We’re on our way,” Malcolm yelled into the speaker as he was helping Hoshi out the door.

**

“How far apart are the contractions?” Phlox asked as he helped Hoshi onto the table.

“There is no time between them doctor,” Hoshi yelled and grabbed Malcolm’s hand, the urge to push overwhelming her.

Malcolm didn’t even flinch, but just continued to stroke her hair.

Phlox threw the drape over Hoshi and took a quick look. “Ah, I see why your contractions have not halted. You are already dilated and crowning. To the count of ten, Ensign, start pushing.”

“One, two, three, four …” Malcolm chanted along with Phlox.

Hoshi screamed and pushed with all of her might.

“Now breathe,” Phlox commanded.

The count started over again and Hoshi pushed.

“Stop pushing,” Phlox stated calmly, reaching over and suctioning the baby’s air passages.

“Now, push,” Phlox, said as he assisted the torso of the baby into the light of sickbay.

Malcolm’s heart broke at the sound of his daughter’s hearty cry. He was torn between her and her mother, but stayed with Hoshi, holding her hand. Ensign Cutler entered sickbay at that time, called moments before Hoshi and Malcolm had arrived. Phlox handed the baby to her and gave her instructions while he attended to Hoshi.

Their daughter was making her presence known, and that presence was not happy having just been expelled out of her mother’s womb.

**

Archer approached Phlox with intent - intent to perpetuate a lie. Starfleet had made it clear that the baby was supposed to be quarantined immediately after her birth. Archer decided it would just be easier to play along with Starfleet’s demand than to substantiate their theory about the crew’s objectivity. “Phlox, could I see you,” he whispered so as not to alarm the new parents.

“Yes, Captain?” Phlox murmured.

“I understand that Hoshi and the baby are fine, but I need your assistance with something.” Archer paused. “I need for you to manufacture data regarding Kamaria.” Archer handed him the Starfleet protocol.

Phlox raised his eyebrows in sure ate at the protocol. “Is it really necessary for Kamaria to be restricted to isolation? She is a bit unusual, I’ll admit, but I don’t think she poses any kind of risk to the crew.”

“Just make sure you’re able to concoct the appropriate data that reflects the parameters Starfleet has established. I have no intention of taking their baby away from them.” Archer nodded in the direction of Malcolm and Hoshi, who were paying attention to the tiny bundle in the bassinet.

“Ah, I see.” Phlox nodded.

**

Hoshi was enthralled with her daughter, marveling at the color of her eyes, the soft black hair, and the tiny hand that wrapped around her fingers. She was so enraptured with Kamaria that she did not even think of what lay ahead. She chose to live in the moment.

Malcolm had fallen in love with his daughter at first sight. She looked just like her mother, with one exception. She had his blue eyes. He knew they could change as she grew, but for now she had his eyes. His heart had never felt this heavy before. He knew they would be unable to keep her. He kept stamping on his desperation to hold on to the moment, knowing it was unrealistic to expect the happiness to last. He tensed as he saw Archer approach them.

Hoshi felt Malcolm tense and saw the reason. She held on to Kamaria with tears in her eyes.

Archer noticed their apprehension and stopped where he was. He smiled. “The doc tells me that you’re ready to be released. He feels you would rest better in your quarters.”

Hoshi didn’t realize she had been holding her breath until she exhaled. “That sounds wonderful.”

Archer nodded to the couple and left.

Malcolm leaned over Hoshi and kissed her. “I love you.”

**

Hoshi dreamt. And for the first time, it was a peaceful dream. She was back on the planet where Kamaria was conceived. She was sleeping in Malcolm’s arms underneath a canopy of trees. But something had woken her. Leaves. Leaves were falling like rain. Malcolm’s body was covered with them. The leaves were warm, offering a blanket for the lovers - a blanket that was unwelcome, as the heat was stifling. The absence of the breeze was noticeable. She would give anything to have the breeze sweep over them to cool them. She sweated and could not cool down. She became restless - kicking and writhing.

**

Hoshi woke with her hair plastered to her neck. She got out of bed, trying not to disturb Malcolm. She felt odd, having been through forty weeks of pregnancy in little over one month. Phlox had assured her that she was fine. But she felt anything but fine.

Hoshi turned on a night light in her daughter’s bassinet. She noticed several changes. Her daughter’s hair was longer than it had been, as was her body, and her facial features had changed. The realization hit her full force and she realized that Kamaria was continuing to grow at an exponential rate - weeks of growth occurring in days, months of growth occurring in weeks. Kamaria looked as though she were no longer an infant. If Kamaria continued to grow like she had grown inside Hoshi, she would not be a part of Hoshi’s life for long. She leaned over the bassinet to pick her daughter up and ran with her to sickbay.

Phlox’s cheery grin faded as soon as he saw the baby in Hoshi’s arms. Silent tears were streaming down Hoshi’s face. Without a sound, Phlox motioned for Hoshi to put Kamaria on the bed for examination. Phlox was astounded as he ran his scans. It had been approximately twenty-four hours since her birth and she was already a healthy twenty-four months old. For every hour of her life, she had aged one month.

Malcolm entered sickbay at that point looking frazzled and winded. At the sight of Hoshi, he relaxed. Then he noticed the baby on the bed. “Is that Kamaria?” He asked, walking closer to the bed.

“Yes, it is. Her development is astonishing. For every hour of her existence, she has aged one month,” Phlox announced with trepidation.

“Is there any way you can slow the growth?” Hoshi asked, her fingers runninrougrough her daughter’s hair.

“No.”

*****