Looking For Solid Ground

++++++++OTH++++++++





"Luke!" Haley called as she entered his room, throwing her bag down. She looked in the mirror, wiping the remaining tears away, not wanting Lucas to know she had been crying—technically, it had been more along the lines of bawling, but either way, Lucas didn't need to know.



"Hey, Hales. What's up?" he asked, walking into his room. "I was just about to head out to the cafe. Mom's been short-staffed the past few days. What's the bag for?"



"I'm going to be staying here with you for a little while. I mean, if that's alright," she added, suddenly growing nervous. She hadn't even thought about the possibility of Lucas saying no. If he said no, then what would she do? She certainly couldn't go back to the apartment.



"Yea, of course," he replied, pulling her into a hug. "Is everything ok? I thought you and Brooke were going to be rooming together again."



"We just need a break for a little while. Too much girl power in one apartment," she laughed, trying to hide the shakiness in her voice.



Lucas looked down at her with a frown, not buying her story, but not wanting to push her. It seemed a bit too fresh.



"Well, yea, of course you can stay here. It'll be like old times again."



"Thanks Luke," she smiled, pulling him into another hug.



"Hey, do you wanna come help out at the cafe? You can make some money, and it'll help keep your mind off of whatever it is you're not telling me," Lucas offered with a smirk.



Haley smiled, "You know me too well."



"It comes with the best friend territory," he smiled back, throwing a comforting arm over her shoulder as they walked out the house.





+++++++++++OTH++++++++++++







Brooke sat and stared at the door. She wasn't sure how long she had been waiting, but when her legs started to give out, she merely sat down and waited some more. Her watery eyes were glued to the door knob as if willing it to turn. She was still at a loss for what happened. She kept replaying everything over and over in her head, but none of it seemed to make since.



"Because Brooke, this isn't just some game to me. You aren't just some game to me."



Brooke groaned inwardly. Why did she have to go and open her big mouth? Everything was perfect, she had the girl of her dreams beneath her, and of course she had to go and screw it up. She wouldn't be Brooke Davis if she hadn't screwed things up.



She suddenly froze. She looked at the doorknob with a raised eyebrow and a cocked head. Girl of her dreams? Had she just thought that? Yes. But what's more, had she meant it?



Brooke began to think back on everything that had been happening. On the feeling of warmth and security she had when she woke up with Haley in her arms. On the nervousness that came over her when Haley was near. On the way their lips seemed to fit perfectly together almost as if their sole purpose in life was to be kissing each other for the rest of eternity.



A smile grew on her face as she stood up. It was true. Haley was the girl of her dreams. This wasn't just some game to her, and it hadn't been for a while now. Brooke nodded firmly, grabbing her keys and wiping her tears as she hurried out the apartment. She had to win her girl back.





++++++++OTH+++++++++





Brooke banged on the door of Lucas's house for several minutes without receiving an answer.



"Damn it!" she cursed, kicking the door.



"Brooke?" came an uncertain voice.



"Oh, Mouth, hey," she greeted with a faltering smile.



"Is everything ok?" Mouth asked, walking up to her cautiously.



"No," she replied honestly.



"Do you want to talk about it?"



"Yea, but I can't."



"Why not?"



"It's way too complicated," Brooke sighed defeatedly. "I still don't even understand all of it."



"Is there anything I can do to help?" he asked, hating to see Brooke look so lost.



"No--yea. Actually if you could tell me if you've seen Haley today, it would really help me out," Brooke replied, looking at Mouth hopefully.



He smiled, "Well, then you're in luck. I just saw her at the cafe. She's waitressing today."



Brooke couldn't help but smile. Only Haley could have a completely emotional wreck of a morning and then go to work where she made most of her money off of smiling and being polite to customers.



"Thanks Mouth," she said, giving him a peck on the cheek. "You've really helped me out."



"Anytime!" he called after as she raced down the sidewalk.





+++++++++OTH+++++++++





"Hey Brooke," Lucas greeted, from behind the counter as she walked into the cafe.



"Is Haley here?" Brooke asked breathlessly.



"Yea, she's in the back, but--"



"I need to talk to her."



Lucas stepped out from behind the counter to block Brooke from entering the back of the cafe.



"I don't think she wants to see you right now."



"Luke, come on. I need to talk to her," she insisted, trying to push her way past him.



Lucas pulled her away from the door, and out of earshot incase Haley was listening.



"Look, Brooke," he said quietly. "I don't know what happened, or whose fault it is. All I know is that she showed up in my room way more hurt than I like seeing her. Now, maybe this is over something stupid like who's turn it is to do the dishes or something, or maybe not. Either way, she's made it clear that she doesn't want to talk to you, and you need to respect that."



"This isn't any of your business," Brooke retorted, growing angry. She had to see Haley, and nobody was going to stop her.



"Haley's my best friend, so yea I think it is my business."



Brooke glared up at him, but Lucas didn't budge. She tried to walk past him, but he held her back.



"Luke,” her voice now soft and wavering, "I need to see her."



"Brooke, what happened?" he asked, noticing the tears that were threatening to fall.



She shook her head, "I can't tell you."



"Look, whatever it is, I'm sure it's no big deal," he assured her.



Brooke thought back to the look in Haley's eyes when she had pushed her off of her. There was so much pain inside of them, and Brooke had been the one to cause it.



"Yea," she choked. "It is."



"Brooke--"



"Lucas, I need to see her," she begged, not able to hold back the tears.



Lucas sighed deeply, it was hurting him to do this to Brooke; however, the look on Haley's face when she told him she didn't want to see Brooke had hurt him even worse.



"Brooke, I'm sorry. Really, I am," he replied quietly, not able to meet her eye.



Brooke nodded, "Thanks for nothing."



"Brooke," he called after her, but she had quickly turned on her heels and exited the cafe.



Lucas took a deep breath as he walked to the back of the cafe. Haley was sitting on the counter, her back to him. He could tell by the way her shoulders were shaking that she was crying.



"Hales--"



"I don't want to talk about it."



"But Brooke does. She seems really sincere. Maybe you should at least give her a chance to apologize for whatever it is she did."



"I can't Luke."



"Why not?" he asked, walking over and jumping onto the counter to sit next to her. "You've forgiven her for everything else, why not now?"



"That's why. I've forgiven her for everything. And I keep putting my trust in her, and she keeps making me look like a fool for doing it."



"You're not a fool."



Haley snorted through her tears.



"Why don't you tell me what happened?"



"I can't."



"Brooke said the same thing," Lucas replied. "You know, there used to be a day when you would tell me everything."



"Yea, and there used to be a day when the only thing we had to worry about was how many scoops of ice cream to put on our cones."



"Can't we just go back to those days?" he asked with a smile.



"No," she said firmly.



Lucas looked at her sadly. It killed him that she felt as if she couldn't trust him.



"Luke, I just want to be alone for a little while, k?"



He frowned, patting her knee before standing, "Ok."



"You know," he added as he walked out the door. "I'm sure whatever Brooke did, really isn't as big a deal as you're making it. I mean, I know Brooke. People's trust means a lot to her, and after the past weeks between you two, I'm sure she wouldn't do anything to break that. So, maybe it isn't as bad as it seems."



New tears formed as the door closed behind him.



"No," she sighed. "This time she only broke my heart."





++++++++++OTH++++++++++





Haley spent the next couple of days walking around like a zombie. She also spent the next few nights, huddled against Lucas, crying her eyes out. She didn't know what to do or where to go.



"So I heard you're sleeping with my boyfriend," a cheery voice greeted as Haley put her books into her locker.



"Hey Peyton," she replied, not even bothering to smile.



"You know, most girls would bother to deny it," Peyton laughed.



"Yea well, I'm a whore I guess," Haley replied flatly.



"Haley," Peyton hurried to catch up with her as she walked away. "Hey, Haley, what's been up? I mean no offense, but you look like crap, and you haven't exactly been your normal sweetheart self lately. Anything you want to talk about?"



Haley stopped in her tracks and faced Peyton with a cold look, "Why don't you go ask your best friend?"



Peyton watched as Haley walked away. She was seriously worried about the girl. She seemed completely withdrawn from everything and everyone. At least when everything happened with the baby and Nathan, she was able to get some talk out of her.





++++++++++OTH++++++++++





"Brooke, what's going on with you and Haley? Did you two have a bitch fight or something?" Peyton asked as the two of them walked through the mall.



"What are you talking about?" Brooke asked, not even bothering to sound confused. She started to walk into a store, but decided against it. She had been doing that all day. She just wasn't in the mood for shopping.



"Something's obviously wrong with Haley, and when I asked her about it she said that I should talk to you."



"Yea well, shit happens," Brooke sighed as she sat down on a near by bench. Peyton sat next to her, watching her carefully as she put her head in her hands. When she looked up, tears were swimming in her eyes.



"I don't know what to do Peyton. I really screwed up this time, and I don't think I can fix it. She won't even look at me let alone talk to me. I can't lose her Pey, especially not now. I need her too much," Brooke admitted, wiping away her tears frustratedly.



"Why?"



Brooke looked at her questioningly.



"Why especially not now? What's going on Brooke? Is everything okay?" Peyton asked worriedly.



Brooke nodded. "Yea, it's just I know how much she's still hurting from everything, and then graduation's coming up and I don't want to ruin our friendship forever, you know?" she lied.



Peyton nodded in understanding, "Why don't you tell me what happened, and maybe I can help you figure out what to do."



Brooke shook her head, "I can't."



"Why not?"



Brooke looked her in the eye, "You wouldn't believe me if I did."





++++++++++OTH+++++++++





Lucas sighed as he watched Haley push her food around her plate.



"Hales, you've got to eat something."



"I'm not hungry," she replied, her voice small.



"That's what you said yesterday, and the day before that."



"Keeping tabs on me?"



"I'm worried about you, that's all," Lucas admitted. "I hate seeing you like this Hales. It's not healthy."



"So, you're my doctor now too?" she asked agitatedly.



"Haley--"



"No," she shook her head, standing from the table. "I don't want or need you to worry about me. I'm a big girl; I can take care of myself." She brought her plate over to the sink and walked into Lucas's room, slamming the door behind her. She curled up on his bed, allowing the tears to flow freely. The truth was, she couldn't take care of herself, but the only person she wanted to take care of her was the one who made her like this.



"Haley," Lucas cautiously entered the room.



"Don't you ever knock?" she asked, wiping the tears away.



"To enter my room?" he asked with a smile. "No, not really."



Haley sat up in bed as Lucas joined her.



"I know you don't want to hear this, but I am worried about you Hales. This isn't like you. You've hardly eaten anything since you've been here. You haven't been sleeping. You've been biting everybody's heads off. And when you think nobody is watching, you cry your eyes out."



Haley looked down at her hands in her lap.



"What's going on?"



"I don't want to talk about it."



"Why?"



"Because it hurts too much," she admitted, as more tears started to fall.



"What does?" Lucas asked carefully.



Haley just shook her head, not answering.



"Haley."



But she shook her head again, biting her lip to keep from letting out a sob.



"Come here," he sighed in defeat. He opened an arm, allowing her to fold into him, soaking his t-shirt with her tears.





++++++++++OTH++++++++++





++++++++++OTH+++++++++



Lucas knocked on the apartment door urgently. Haley had finally cried herself to sleep, and he was able to slide out from under her. He had decided that this thing had to end once and for all.



"Luke?" Brooke asked surprisedly.



Lucas eyed her with a frown. She was in a pair of baggy shorts and a loose t-shirt with a pint of ice cream in her hand and tear stains down her cheeks.



"Missed you at school today," he commented as she stepped out of the way, allowing him to enter the apartment.



"I didn't feel like going," she shrugged.



"Want to sit?" she asked, watching as Lucas paced the living room nervously.

He nodded, joining her on the couch.



Brooke watched him as he wrung his hands nervously. She smiled, that was something Haley always did. The smile quickly faded as a quick pain shot through her chest at the thought of the tutor.



"Lucas, what do you want?"



"I want you and Haley back together," he replied.



Brooke's eyes grew wide, "I--we--huh?"



"Look, I don't know what happened, but ever since this fight thing started, Haley hasn't been herself. She hasn't been eating, she hasn't been sleeping. She's crying nonstop. You guys need to work this out and be roommates again, because I can't take this anymore."



"Roommates," Brooke nodded, letting out a deep breath. She sat in thought for a little while. Haley hadn't been eating--Brooke hadn't stopped. Haley hadn't been sleeping--this was the first time that Brooke had gotten out of bed in two days. But the crying nonstop--that they had in common.



"Brooke, can't you just apologize or something?" Lucas asked.



She glared at him, "I tried that, remember? You were the one that prevented that from happening."



He cringed at the fierceness of her voice, "I know, and I'm sorry."



"Now, it's just too late."



Lucas looked at her incredulously, "Too late? Too late? You're Brooke Davis for Heaven's sake. Since when is anything too late for you? I've always been so impressed with the way that you never give up, no matter how steep the odds. You never stop until you get what you want, so why should now be any different?"



Brooke let his words sink in, and jumped up quickly.



"You're right," she smiled. "You are totally right."



She rushed over to the counter, grabbing her keys.



"Whoa, where are you going?" Lucas asked, standing from the couch.



"To see Haley?"



"Maybe you should wait until tomorrow. You know, after you've had a good night's sleep...and a shower," he teased.



Brooke frowned, "Yea, good idea."



Lucas smiled, patting her shoulder. Now, hopefully, things would return back to normal.





++++++++++OTH+++++++++





Brooke wiped the steam off the mirror. She smiled to herself. This was it. This was the day she was going to get her girl back.





+++++++++OTH++++++++





"Hey, B. Davis. You're looking beautiful. What's the occasion?" Peyton greeted as she joined Brooke at her locker.



Brooke raised a questioning eyebrow.



"Not that you aren't always beautiful. You just normally go for more the sexy look," Peyton explained.



"Yea, I know," Brooke nodded with a smirk. "But sometimes you got to break hearts instead of bust balls."



Peyton laughed as she threw an arm over her shoulder, "Come on friend. We can't be late for first period; you've already missed enough class this week."



Brooke bit her lip as they approached Haley's locker. Haley looked up as they passed, and for a brief moment their eyes connected, and Brooke felt it.



Haley looked up to find Brooke walking past in the hall, and her breath caught in her throat. She didn't know what it was, but she looked even more gorgeous than normal. It may have been the fact that she wasn't wearing as much make up as normal, or as small of clothes. Whatever it was, Haley felt her heart race. When their eyes met, she gave Brooke a small, nervous smile.



Brooke couldn't help but beam back; Haley's smiles, however small, always made her heart skip a beat. Lucas was right, this was far from over.





++++++++++OTH+++++++++





Brooke paced the hall anxiously. It was now or never. She chewed on her bottom lip nervously, causing herself to smile. Haley was starting to rub off on her. She peaked around the corner and saw Haley approach her locker to get what she needed for homework. Brooke nodded, glad she was alone. She felt a warm shiver as she heard her voice drift down the halls as Haley sung to herself. She could recognize that voice in a crowd of millions.



"I...I don't hardly know her--"



Brooke's ears picked up at the last word of that line.



"But I think I could love her."



She felt her blood rush through her veins.



"Crimson and Clover--I

when she comes walking over

I've been dying to show her--I wanna show her

Crimson and Clover

over and overrrrr--"



Brooke's mind was racing as she was trying to figure out what the hell crimson and clover meant, but it was becoming increasingly difficult because Haley's voice had the power to completely undo her. She heard Haley's locker door close and her voice picked up steam.



"Yea...

Well I'm not such a sweet thing.

I wanna do every-thing...everything."



Brooke wasn't sure how much more of this song she could take. The words alone were enough to make anyone crazy, but coming from Haley who had the slightest almost rocker growl in her voice that Brooke had never heard her use, it was too much.



"What a beautiful fee-lin'...feelin'...feelin'

Crimson and Clover

over and overrrr--"



She took a deep breath, and as Haley turned the corner, she grabbed her arm, pulling her into the dark janitor's closet.



Haley gasped, but relaxed instantly. The softness of the hand on her arm was undeniable, and there was only one person who could make a pleasurable fire race through her veins at such a simple touch even when she couldn't see to whom the hand belonged.



"Brooke," she whispered. "What the hell are you doing?"



"You've been completely ignoring me this whole week, so I figured this was the only way I could get you to listen to me."



"To kidnap me and stash me in a dark closet?"



"Oh, sorry," Brooke laughed nervously, her hand reaching up to find the string for the light. She pulled it carefully, casting a dull glow over them.



"Yea, cause that's so much better," Haley grumbled, rolling her eyes.



Brooke nodded, "So, you're still mad?"



"I'm not mad Brooke," Haley sighed, taking a step back to lean against the wall.



"If you're not mad, why won't you even look at me?"



"Because you hurt me Brooke. You really hurt me."



"Because of my big mouth?"



"Do you even know what it was you said that upset me?" Haley asked.



Brooke nodded quickly, as she took a step towards her, "Yes."



Haley shrunk back against the wall, and Brooke froze.



"Sorry."



Haley crossed her arms, becoming very guarded.



"Look, I've narrowed it down to what I said while we were, you know."



Haley smirked, "Wow, you're smarter than I thought."



Brooke cringed, and Haley immediately apologized, "Brooke, I am so sorry. I didn't mean that at all. I swear."



Brooke nodded, "I guess I kind of deserved that."



"No, you didn't, and I swear Brooke, I didn't mean it. I'm just...upset, that's all."



"I know, and I'm so sorry for hurting you, for making you think that this was all just some game to me."



Haley crossed her arms, once more bringing up her defenses.



"Haley, don't do this."



"Do what?" she asked. "Protect myself? Because that would be the smartest thing that I've done in a long time."



"Protect yourself from what? Me?" Brooke asked incredulously. "Haley, I would never hurt you. You have to know that."



"Too late," Haley replied, her voice faltering. "You already did."



"Haley, you aren't just some game to me."



"Oh really? Then pray tell, what am I?"



"I--I don't know," she sighed. "All I know is that I can't get you out of my mind. Every time I see you, all I want to do is take you in my arms and kiss you. I crave the feeling I get when you're next to me. I've never felt the way I feel when I feel your fingers on my skin. And the other day, the feeling of you beneath me--that's probably the closest to heaven that I'll ever be."



Haley closed her eyes, trying to keep the tears from falling. She smiled softly, "So, it's just about sex. I'm just some big experiment."



Brooke groaned frustratedly as she took Haley's chin in her hand, forcing the smaller to girl to look her in her eyes. She could feel the electricity flowing between them.



"No, it's about this," she replied firmly. "It's about the fact that when I look in your eyes, I know exactly who I am and why I’m here. It's about the fact that when I wake up in the morning, even though you're the one in my arms, I feel safe. It's about the fact that there has never been anybody who can make me smile like you can. It's about the fact that even though you don't see it, you are the most beautiful person in the world. It's about the fact that I can't breathe when I'm around you. It's about the fact that I am so scared, and what's ironic is that you're the only person that I would ever admit that to."



"What are you scared of?" Haley asked softly, her voice shaking as the tears fell.



"I'm scared of the fact that you make me feel safe. And I'm scared of the fact that I can't breathe when I'm around you. And I'm scared of the fact that you are so beautiful that I never want to look away. And," she continued surprised by her own honesty, "I'm scared of the fact that I feel things for you that I've never felt before. And after Lucas, I swore that I would never let myself get hurt again, that I would never let myself get so caught up in somebody that I would have to relive that, but it's too late. I'm so far gone into you Haley that you could destroy my world with one word, and that scares me to death."



"Brooke?" Haley questioned, her voice trembling.



"Yea?"



"I'm scared too."



Brooke exhaled slowly, as she wrapped an arm around Haley, pulling her into a deep hug. When she pulled away, Brooke took her face in her hands. She gently wiped Hale's tears away with her thumbs and leaned in slowly, pausing to look into Haley's eyes, searching for some kind of sign. She saw it, deep inside of them. She wasn't even sure what it was, but she knew it was there. She carefully, closed the distance between their lips.



Brooke pressed her lips against Haley's gently. When she felt Haley lean into the kiss, she sighed, opening her mouth slightly, capturing Haley's lips in her own. She had missed this feeling. The feeling that no matter whatever else was going on at the time, when she was kissing Haley, she knew that it would all be okay.



Haley's lips were so soft as she returned the kiss, wanting nothing more than to show Brooke that she felt the exactly as she had just described. It was a different kiss than their previous ones. It was so loving and gentle, that Haley felt guilty for being surprised that it was coming from Brooke.



Brooke slowly pulled away, opening her eyes. She smiled to find Haley's still closed. She kissed each of her eyelids, then her lips once more.



"That was..." she struggled to find the words to describe what had just happened as she placed her forehead against Haley's.



"Amazing," Haley replied with a breathless smile.



Brooke blushed in the dark, "Yea."



"Yea," Haley nodded, closing her eyes once more in bliss.



"So..."



"So...Now what?" she asked.



"I don't know," Brooke laughed slightly. "I'm just trying not to put my foot in my mouth again."