The Hardest Test

     Steve was up all night testing his antidote.  By 6:30 am Sunday, he had run all of the tests he didn’t have the chance to run before Laura caught him that night.  By all accounts, his antidote worked perfectly.  That still didn’t explain why Laura was dreaming about him.  A part of him was glad that the solution to her symptoms wasn’t as simple as a recalculation.  He was thrilled that something good may come out of this situation.  She may have finally had real feelings for him.  There was another part of him, however, that was terrified that he had yet to fix it.  He realized that telling her the truth, that there was nothing wrong with his potion, was going to sound very suspicious.  She already didn’t trust him.  Telling her that, unfortunately, she would have to have sexy dreams about him forever wasn’t likely to come off as a genuine disappointment to him.  Whereas, bringing her a solution, wrapped in an apology, may make her start to trust him again.  He still had some Hail Mary tests and analyses to try, but it wasn’t looking good, and for the life of him, he couldn’t decide which outcome he was rooting for.

     Meanwhile, Laura found herself drifting in and out of sleep that morning before dawn.  She was also drifting in and out of her dreams.

     “Oohhh, Steve,” Laura moaned as he increased his speed.  “That’s it, baby.  Faster!  Please!”

     Steve was on top of her as they lay on the floor, next to the hot, glowing fire.  He started to pump faster, being sure that each thrust was deep so she could feel his full length.  “Oh, yeah.  You like that, Sweetums?” Steve purred, “You like the way I… unhh… feel inside you?”

     “Yes, Steve,” Laura gasped breathlessly.  God!  He was a machine.  Laura couldn’t believe how lucky she was to have this man.  He was all hers… for the rest of their lives.  She felt her orgasm approaching.  She had been coming for him all night, and it seemed like he never even broke a sweat.  She knew that he loved hearing her scream his name and feeling her walls tighten around him, but she wanted to do more for him.  She wanted to please him.  She needed to please him.  She opened her eyes to beg him.  “Please, Steve, will you come with me this time?  Please, I need it.  Please, baby.”

     He grinned down at her, “Not yet, my pet.  This is all for you.  Everything I do, I do for you.”  He kissed her deeply as she moaned for him.  He buried his face in her neck so he could whisper in her ear as he increased his pace for the final time.  “Come for me, Laura Lee.  Come all over my big, Urkel coc–”

     Laura shot up as she was ripped from her dream and thrust back into her dark, empty room.  She pulled her pillow over her face and screamed in frustration, but she couldn’t tell what exactly was frustrating her.  She wasn’t sure if she was mad that these dreams wouldn’t go away or mad that they always ended before she was finished.  She felt a wetness between her legs and rolled her eyes.  She couldn’t even understand why these dreams turned her on so much.  They were so unrealistic.  She was almost 100% sure that Steve was still a virgin.  There was no way he could last that long or get her anywhere near the finish line…  Right?  And they were so cheesy!  She was disgusted to wake up with memories of her begging and whimpering under a man.  Damn, girl, she thought to her dream-self, get ahold of yourself.  He’s not that great and he definitely doesn’t have that much self-confidence.  Besides, she thought as she sat up to stretch, if Steve and I ever did do that, there is no way I would be the one begging.  This had to stop.  She decided to go check on Steve to see if he had made any progress, but not before a long, cold shower.

     When she reached the garage, a couple of hours later, she opened the door to find Steve sitting in the corner, propped up on a couple of boxes, with his glum face resting in his hands.

     “Hard at work, I see,” she glared, a little miffed that he wasn’t putting more effort into solving her problem, and a little miffed at him in general.

     He jumped when she spoke, immediately taking his position next to his notebooks and chemicals.  He didn’t have anything left to do with them, he just felt better, armed with science.  He knew this was going to be tough to explain.  “Good morning, Sunshine.  How d’ya sleep?”

     “Not very well.”

     “Oh, no!  Did good ol’ Urkel the Sandman drop by your noggin again last night?  Did he… bring you a dream?” he said with a wiggle in his brow and a shake in his hips.  “Was he the cutest–”

     “Steve, would you, please, take this seriously?!” she barked.

     He exhaled heavily.  “I’m sorry, Sweetums.  I promise, I am taking this very seriously.  It’s just… I was up all night working on this, Laura, and… it’s not the antidote.”

     Laura clenched her jaw and glared, trying to figure out if he was lying.

     He saw right through her stare, “That’s the truth, Laura,” he said, raising his right hand.  “I swear.”  He picked up one of the notebooks and started flipping through pages and gesturing wildly, almost like he expected her to be able to follow along.  “I spent all last night running the tests that I hadn’t had the chance to run before.  Then, I ran them all again, with no change in the results.  After that, I started to make up new tests that covered completely unlikely scenarios.  They, of course, got me nowhere.  Then, I just sat and thought, willing my brain to come up with something, anything, else to try.  There is no indication, Laura, that whatever you’ve been dreaming about is a direct result of my Woowoo Juice or its antidote.  It’s not still affecting you and vivid dreams just can’t be a side-effect.  Let me know if your sweat starts coming out green, though, would’jya?”

     She crossed her arms and shook her head.

     “It doesn’t mean anything, Laura.  People who spend time together have naughty dreams about each other, occasionally.  When we were kids, I once had a dream like that about Ms. Steuben; it sure doesn’t mean I’m interested.  You had to spend some time thinking about me… like that… recently.  The dreams will go away, Laura.  I’m sorry I can’t do more to help.”

     Laura walked and out of the garage, slamming the door without another word.