Demon after demon
folder
Supernatural › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
6
Views:
1,146
Reviews:
0
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Supernatural › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
6
Views:
1,146
Reviews:
0
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I don't own supernatural at all ;) and make no money off of this story, it is simply for fun and enjoyment!
The truth comes out
Shocked and amazed that Zach actually agreed with him he grinned like a happy little kid in a candy shop. "Hell yes, bed here I..." and he stopped. His lips pressed together, was that a good lookin that he just heard? It was! It was also silly how giddy it made him that Zach said that. He was so confused after this morning and just about given up hope that the man even liked him at all. Some quick bats of the eyes and shake of his head he quickly brushed it off. Not really wanting to get his hopes up too much.
"Thanks for the breakfast, I'll pay you back... somehow." he said with a wink scooted out of his chair. The whole way back to the hotel he didn't say a word. He worked on hobbling quickly across the street and dodging Zachs eye line. For he found himself starring at him a lot, wishing he could get into his head and know once and for all what he was thinking. Like really thinking. After that moment in the room, the gentle caress of his cheek Mike felt anxious; in a good way, about being so close to him again.
What if things really went further without Zach stopping and pulling away! He noticed he was breathing just a tad bit too heavy thinking about the possibilities. Zach was amazingly hot, and not to mention was a really great guy, as far as he knew. He was taking care of a stranger and helping him out the best he could. Mike wanted to know him more, figure him out and learn him. So he followed in his strange behavior, grinning and looking away until they reached the room. In which he kicked off his shoes and flopped gently onto the bed. Waiting... blinking up at the ceiling and drumming his fingers on his chest.
Zach spent longer than normal in the toilet, most of it spent staring at himself in the mirror. Trying desperately to remind himself of why he had promised himself that he would never get close to anyone again. Images of his sister, his mother, his Adam.... oh god, Adam. He really didn't want to start thinking about that now. He wouldn't be able to sleep at all if he began thinking about all that. It would be like he was stuck in a waking nightmare. Like it had been for months after it all happened. But now he had started thinking about it he couldn't get it out of his head. And as he looked at himself in the mirror he felt his guilt and anger rise. He felt his self loathing bubbling up and consuming him.
He wanted to reach out and punch the mirror. Smash it to bits so he didn't have to see himself anymore. But he knew if he did that it would get Mike's attention and he really didn't need to explain why he'd shattered a harmless mirror for no reason. So he simply pulled himself up to his full height and mind still churning and clouded with images of those he'd lost he walked out of the bathroom and made the mistake of stopping to look at Mike lying on the bed. He had expected the man to already be asleep, he'd taken long enough in the bathroom. But he wasn't he was still awake and he looked so... right lying there waiting for Zach to join him.
It was a second to long that Zach stood looking at Mike and he was sure the guy must have noticed. But he couldn't help it. The moment he'd seen him, all the painful memories and images that had tormented him in front of the mirror moments ago, seem to vanish. And all he could see was the man lying before him, and all he wanted was to lay down beside him and snuggle in close. Safe in his arms. He wanted to sleep with Mike holding him close, feel his warmth. He had not had a nights sleep without a cold empty feeling since he had started hunting, since he had lost Adam. And for some reason, something in him told him that if he would just let Mike into his life, he wouldn't have that cold lonely feeling anymore.... but could he really do it? Could he risk it all again just so he wasn't alone anymore....
Honestly he really didn't know anymore....
He finally pulled himself out of his thoughts and quit staring at Mike. He moved to the bed and pulling back the covers, glad it was a cold day, he slid underneath them and settled himself on his back. His hands resting on his stomach on top of the covers. He didn't look over at Mike, instead he just closed his eyes and tried to sleep. He had settled himself closer to Mike than he'd intended but he reasoned with himself that it would have looked childish to lay so close to the each of the bed he was at danger of falling out. This he told himself was the reason he was laying in what you could call the center of his half of the bed.
Mike realized he was holding his breath when the walls of his chest began to burn and ache. Thing's got really hot when he watched Zach looking down at him the way he was. He tried to remain cool, unchanged, but good lord was that a hard thing to do and then Zach came to lay down and the drumming fingers on his chest just went to tapping even louder than before. In a way it mimicked what was going on inside of him.
Instead of laying there like a dummy he really just wanted to turn, put his arm out and wrap it around Zach. Pull himself in close to the one thing that made him feel safe and sleep the day away. Forget all the shit that he's been through, and the silly complications that get in the way of two people and just.. be there with him.
He felt like an idiot. It's been about an entire day and he was falling head over heels. Cupid was strange sometimes. And not to mention cruel.. "Goodnight." he whispered. Looking over at Zachs closed eyes. Finally he went silent and turned his eyes back to the window. Watching the light peek through the fabric until he could bring himself to sleep.
Zach lay quietly for close to fifteen minutes, his eyes closed, hands still resting on his chest. He couldn't sleep and he was pretty sure that no amount of just laying here would fix the problem. He knew what that problem was and he knew how to fix it. He just had to build himself up to it. Or he had to get up and run like fuck... It was this question he spent the next five minutes trying to answer before he slowly opened his eyes and turned his head to look at Mike.
The other man had his eyes closed and was lying in pretty much the same position as he was. But Zach was fairly certain he wasn't asleep either. His breathing hadn't changed since they'd laid down. Turning his eyes back up to the ceiling Zach could feel his hand shake slightly as he pushed the covers down his body so that the edge of the quilt rested at his hips. He pushed his shirt up quietly and revealed part of his torso. Tanned and firm but with one very obvious imperfection.
As he lay there, checking that Mikes eyes were still closed, which they were. He ran his fingers lightly over the thick sinewy scar tissue that ran along his stomach. It was about six inches in all, but not straight like a surgical scar would have been. It was jagged and torn looking. As though someone had ripped through his flesh into his body. Which as it turns out is exactly what had happened.
He stopped tracing it with his fingers and gently reached out to take one of Mike's hands. The one closest to him, his fingers wrapped around it as he lifted it up. He still hadn't moved his eyes from the ceiling. He couldn't look at Mike while he told his story. He'd never told anyone about it. Not the whole thing like he was planning to do now. And for the love of god he could not work out why he needed so badly to tell it now. All he knew was that he did.
He brought Mikes hand to his stomach, placed his fingers on the scar. His own hand resting on top of Mikes, pressing it down onto his skin. The warmth from Mikes hand felt so good in the cool air of the hotel. But Zach was trembling because he was so nervous about what he was about to say. He paused then and just held Mikes hand to his stomach, letting Mikes fingers trace the scar if they wanted to.
"I got this the day my mother died..." He muttered in a strangled voice. He was working very hard to keep the emotion out of it. To steady it, he hoped it was working. "I would have gone with her if..." He paused, it was hard to remember who had done this to him and his mother, let alone say the name out loud, "....Adam had had a little more time..." He all but whispered the name. It broke him to think about it and now he was determined to talk about it. He hoped to god Mike didn't say to much as he paused to reorder his thoughts so he could continue. He needed to get this all out without to much interference or he would just shut himself up again... then again, he might need Mike to push him a little to continue he was so confused about what the hell he was doing or why.
Mike found himself drifting off, not into sleep but thought. Not about anything deep or important, just random things. How was his mother, did they take his cat and give it to a good home, hoped that his truck was being taken care of. These things popped in and out of his mind like changing the channels on a television. The only station he kept going back to, Zach. He wondered, what would become of the man when he told Mike to hit the road after the one week. Sure he would go about his business, hunting, sleeping, whatever. But Mike would be out on his own, always wanting to know if he was alright, or safe.
Lost in these scattered thoughts he felt the slightest touch of his hand, and then felt it moved. He opened his eyes and looked down at what he was led to. Zachs stomach. His heart went about a million a minute. Then he opened his mouth to speak but what came from Zachs mouth stopped him dead. Mike ran his thumb along the jagged, scarred skin and looked horrified up a the man. Something had taken his mother, and left him with this.
"What happened?" he whispered through the lump in his throat, full of concern his eyes followed up Zachs body, stopping at his face and that is where they stayed. Adam? he questioned to himself. Had this been a lover, or something of the sort. Was this why he pulled himself away so many times... god Mike wanted to cry and he didn't even know the story yet. He made not one single move, only rubbed his one finger gently back and forth and waited quietly. Giving Zach the time he needed.
Zach finally turned his head to look at Mike and his eyes locked to his and he felt his breath catch. He'd never seen eyes like Mikes and they were so beautiful. He decided then and there that he had to tell him his story. Who knows it might do Zach some good to tell it to somebody else. God knows it was a weight he carried around every day.
He tore his gaze away from Mike and looked back up at the ceiling. His fingers interlocked with Mikes. Holding tight to the hand that still rested on his stomach. He didn't know why but he knew he needed the contact right now. If he was really going to talk about this shit. He needed to know Mike was still there. Because he already knew he couldn't look at him as he spoke.
Zach drew in a deep breath and decided that he had to go right back, to when it all started. To when he lost Adam... "Adam was my partner in the NYPD when I used to be a cop. We had been put together as partners right out of the academy which is rare. Cause normally a rookie is teamed up with a veteran. We used to say it was fates way of bringing us together. It used to make us laugh. We had been working together about a year when it became more than just friendship and work. I've never loved anyone the way I loved Adam. He was the love of my life. And he loved me just as much.
We never told anyone on the force. Gay cops still got a real hard time back then. We weren't even sure it was allowed. So we kept it quiet. It wasn't hard, even when we moved in together, its not unusual for two young cops, working their way up to room together." Zach paused and breathed deeply. He had not told anyone about how he and Adam had met or their early time together. "We were together for almost five years" He continued "When Adam and I were called to investigate a report of domestic violence. Turns out a demon had possessed the body of a young girl. This kid was only five Mike, and the demon had used her to kill her whole family. It was the worst thing I had ever seen.
Up until that time at any rate. Anyway, the little girl came after us when we arrived. She got to Adam first, snapped his neck, her eyes turning black. He just sort of... crumbled onto the ground. I can't remember what happened next really. I know I was screaming and when I did finally come round to my senses, I was holding Adam in my arms and the girl sat shivering in corner crying. The demon had left her. Why it left me alive I still don't know. Anyway, I knew then that what ever had killed the girls family, whatever had killed Adam wasn't natural. It wasn't human. So after that moment, I quit the NYPD and I went to search for anyone who could tell me about what the hell had happened. About what was out there."
Zach stopped again and squeezed Mikes hand again, the gentle feeling of his thumb stroking his stomach more soothing than he'd have thought such a small gesture could have been.
"So that is who Adam is and what happened to him" He said quietly when he started talking again. "It was his ghost who gave me the scar, who almost ripped me apart with his hands. It was his ghost who killed my mother. I couldn't protect her, I couldn't even save myself. If Adam's ghost hadn't disappeared when it had I'd have been dead too. He was, as you can see, pretty close to killing me. I found out later that it was a seal of the Apocalypse being broken. That is what brought Adam's ghost back, that is why he was so violent and angry. It was all part of the spell to rise the wittinesses. The spell was broken and the ghosts went back to rest. Not in time to save my mother though..."
He stopped talking now and lay very quiet. He didn't know what he expected Mike's reaction to be. He didn't know how he was meant to feel now he'd told his story. Even if he hadn't mentioned his sister yet. And even if he'd left a bunch of stuff out. He'd still put it out there. He felt a silent tear fall down the side of his face onto the bed and he couldn't even bring himself to wipe it away. For once he didn't care if he was seen crying, Mike could think he was weak if he wanted. Zach really didn't care right now.
Mike felt a strange thrill run through him when Zach finally turned and looked at him. He could see the obvious pain in his eyes and it pained Mike in ways he never imagined something could. Of course he's seen his share of sad and heartbreaking things. Parents being called to the E.R and being informed that there child had been taken from them. There were countless stories like those, some nights he was driven to his car way out in the back of the parking lot to cry like a baby. He knew the pain in a persons eye's when it came to the loss of someone they loved. With Zach he wanted to make it better, to hold him tight and make the pain go away, even if it was for just a moment.
His face was soft and unjudging, small lines in his forehead formed slowly. The prominent brows he came to love about himself pressed together slightly the more he heard. How this man survived and found the strength to carry on was so amazing to him. After being so in love with Adam, being so close and happy and having that man ripped from him would have driven Mike mad. And then to see that same man as a ghost and having him murder your mother. There was a lot about this "world"; he kept calling it, that made him want to rethink his decision to become a part of it.
His mothers sweet, plump face just kept popping into his mind. Could he do this to her, put her in harms way for his own need to be courageous. But than again she was no more safe now then she would be if he backed out. He began to feel slightly panicked, but he knew it was right what he was going to do. This was right. He focused on the warmth beneath his fingers and the strong hand gripping his, needing to be strong right now he pushed away those fears.
The pained reaction that had become plastered on his face relaxed. It was the tear gliding down Zachary's cheek that caused him to move so suddenly that he hadn't even realized he'd done it. He was gently wiping away this tear. His hand moved from the scar and he propped himself up in his elbow. Facing Zach. There were no words that could have done this moment justice. His protective hand was there, one finger bent as it slowly went the wet path of the tear, drying it and anymore that may decided to follow. "Come here.." he mouthed. Pulling Zach gently to him into an embrace.
Zach felt himself stiffen as Mike pulled him into an embrace. It was not what Zach had been expecting and the shock of it took him by surprise. He lay in Mike's arms tense and cold for what felt like forever as his mind whirled. All he could do was ask himself why Mike was even still there beside him. Never mind why the guy would want to be closer to him, to hold him. Part of Zach had been so sure that his story would be to much for Mike, that he was hear it and bolt. Part of him had wanted him too.
But as he lay there held in strong warm arms, pulled close so his chest was pressed against Mike's. His head fell just below Mikes chin. As he remembered what it was like to be held, really held. It had nothing to do with sex or lust. No this embrace was all about comfort. Mike wanted to help Zach, but he knew words could never be enough. So he was doing this... he was holding him. And as these thoughts dawned on Zach he felt something inside him shatter. And suddenly he was beyond all thought, his mind became a blur as his body stopped fighting the embrace and instead fell into it. His body melded itself to the man before him. His arm wrapped around Mike's waist and pulled him closer, his head fell into the mans chest, nuzzling the soft material of his shirt. Even his legs molded themselves to Mike's and he clung to him like letting go meant losing everything.
He didn't really even realise just how hard he was clinging. His brain couldn't focus on anything expect the warm, safe feeling he was getting from being here in this mans arms. And then he was crying... or perhaps he'd been crying forever, Zach couldn't tell. He couldn't remember when the tears started. I could have been before he'd even started talking. But now he was sobbing into Mike's chest and his eyes were closed tight. It was a silent endless pain ridden sobbing that, but for the wet tears leaking onto Mikes shirt and the shuddering of his shoulders, would never have been noticed. It was the tears falling that for years Zach had not let fall. That he had kept bottled up inside himself. He finally let them all out. All it had taken was the kindness of a stranger, someone to reach out and take hold of him as though they really cared.
Mike felt the fight in Zach as he held on to him. This time he wasn't letting go so easily. Not when he knew this was the right thing to do, he felt it was what this man needed. He could tell Zach had been holding this all in. God knew how long it'd been that he's talked about this, that was if he ever has. Then it was like something changed all of a sudden, and he felt willing arms wrap around him. He took in a quick gulp of air and held on tighter.
The release of all these emotions was dizzying and he was glad to be laying down. He nuzzled his nose in Zachary's hair and breathed in the sweet scent of him. To feel him so close, to let him sob openly and have it be alright was the most amazing thing. He felt warm and almost at home. His body fit Zach so perfectly, no awkward uncomfort what-so ever. Their bodies melted together. Filling the icy cold cracks between that seemed to be where fear and pain lived and burrowed.
The warmth they created snuffed that out. Mike pressed his hand on the small of Zachs back, running it up slowly and stopping at the back of his neck. Letting his fingers tangle themselves up in his hair. The same soft, sweet smelling stuff he had his lips pressed to. "I'm so sorry." he breathed in a soft husky, strained voice. He to had begun to weep silently. Hot tears fell down his cheeks and he let them.
Zach wasn't sure how long it took. How long he lay crying into Mike's shirt. All he knew was that he couldn't stop and he didn't ever feel like moving. He felt warm and completely safe for the first time since he'd lost Adam. He never imagined he'd find someone else who could get to him like this guy was. And he knew that he should have been terrified by it like he had been early. But right now he didn't have the energy to worry about that. And he really, really didn't want to ruin this feeling. Not right now anyway.
As his tears started to dry up he began to breath more slowly and his eyes grew heavy even while they were shut. As he rolled his head to the side so that his ear was pressed firmly to Michael's breast he felt sleep pulling at him. He was so warm and comfortable... more comfortable than he'd been since he could remember. God he was torn between wanting to sleep and for once he thought he might not be plagued with the normal nightmares, and trying to stay awake because he didn't want to miss a second of this feeling.
He couldn't really speak because his mind was so exhausted that coherent thought wasn't an option. But he managed to mumble out a "Thank you" before he couldn't hold himself awake any longer. He was vaguely aware of pulling Mike even closer and snuggling into him a little deeper. Before his mind when black and he feel into the deepest sleep he may have ever had. There were no dreams, not pain, just long over due, glorious sleep...
Mike took in a deep breath and let it out. It felt good to breath of his own free will now. Zach fell asleep, and the only way Mike could tell was he began to relax and had stopped crying. Like a baby who's exhausted themselves, the only thing to do is let sleep take them and wake renewed. Feeling the man drift off brought about the same in him.
He needed to sleep. To be right here holding Zach and keep him safe, how ever safe he could manage. In an attempt to be very quiet, not wanting to disturb anything he pulled his hand away and reached behind his head, wiggling his fingers around and blindly grabbing a pillow. He stuck it under his head and then curled his arm around Zachs waist.
His chest ballooned with air when he yawned. No matter how hush hush he tied to be there was no about of control that could have kept him from letting out a groaning sound and stopping his body from shaking and tensing as he yawned. He moved his head back and rested it on the fluffy soft pillow and closed his tired eyes. Sleep came like a tidal wave, sweeping him away before he knew it.
*******
Authors Note: So this was a pretty epic Chapter for Zach. Pretty angsty and emotional. Let me know what you think guys please? Love comments! xoxo
"Thanks for the breakfast, I'll pay you back... somehow." he said with a wink scooted out of his chair. The whole way back to the hotel he didn't say a word. He worked on hobbling quickly across the street and dodging Zachs eye line. For he found himself starring at him a lot, wishing he could get into his head and know once and for all what he was thinking. Like really thinking. After that moment in the room, the gentle caress of his cheek Mike felt anxious; in a good way, about being so close to him again.
What if things really went further without Zach stopping and pulling away! He noticed he was breathing just a tad bit too heavy thinking about the possibilities. Zach was amazingly hot, and not to mention was a really great guy, as far as he knew. He was taking care of a stranger and helping him out the best he could. Mike wanted to know him more, figure him out and learn him. So he followed in his strange behavior, grinning and looking away until they reached the room. In which he kicked off his shoes and flopped gently onto the bed. Waiting... blinking up at the ceiling and drumming his fingers on his chest.
Zach spent longer than normal in the toilet, most of it spent staring at himself in the mirror. Trying desperately to remind himself of why he had promised himself that he would never get close to anyone again. Images of his sister, his mother, his Adam.... oh god, Adam. He really didn't want to start thinking about that now. He wouldn't be able to sleep at all if he began thinking about all that. It would be like he was stuck in a waking nightmare. Like it had been for months after it all happened. But now he had started thinking about it he couldn't get it out of his head. And as he looked at himself in the mirror he felt his guilt and anger rise. He felt his self loathing bubbling up and consuming him.
He wanted to reach out and punch the mirror. Smash it to bits so he didn't have to see himself anymore. But he knew if he did that it would get Mike's attention and he really didn't need to explain why he'd shattered a harmless mirror for no reason. So he simply pulled himself up to his full height and mind still churning and clouded with images of those he'd lost he walked out of the bathroom and made the mistake of stopping to look at Mike lying on the bed. He had expected the man to already be asleep, he'd taken long enough in the bathroom. But he wasn't he was still awake and he looked so... right lying there waiting for Zach to join him.
It was a second to long that Zach stood looking at Mike and he was sure the guy must have noticed. But he couldn't help it. The moment he'd seen him, all the painful memories and images that had tormented him in front of the mirror moments ago, seem to vanish. And all he could see was the man lying before him, and all he wanted was to lay down beside him and snuggle in close. Safe in his arms. He wanted to sleep with Mike holding him close, feel his warmth. He had not had a nights sleep without a cold empty feeling since he had started hunting, since he had lost Adam. And for some reason, something in him told him that if he would just let Mike into his life, he wouldn't have that cold lonely feeling anymore.... but could he really do it? Could he risk it all again just so he wasn't alone anymore....
Honestly he really didn't know anymore....
He finally pulled himself out of his thoughts and quit staring at Mike. He moved to the bed and pulling back the covers, glad it was a cold day, he slid underneath them and settled himself on his back. His hands resting on his stomach on top of the covers. He didn't look over at Mike, instead he just closed his eyes and tried to sleep. He had settled himself closer to Mike than he'd intended but he reasoned with himself that it would have looked childish to lay so close to the each of the bed he was at danger of falling out. This he told himself was the reason he was laying in what you could call the center of his half of the bed.
Mike realized he was holding his breath when the walls of his chest began to burn and ache. Thing's got really hot when he watched Zach looking down at him the way he was. He tried to remain cool, unchanged, but good lord was that a hard thing to do and then Zach came to lay down and the drumming fingers on his chest just went to tapping even louder than before. In a way it mimicked what was going on inside of him.
Instead of laying there like a dummy he really just wanted to turn, put his arm out and wrap it around Zach. Pull himself in close to the one thing that made him feel safe and sleep the day away. Forget all the shit that he's been through, and the silly complications that get in the way of two people and just.. be there with him.
He felt like an idiot. It's been about an entire day and he was falling head over heels. Cupid was strange sometimes. And not to mention cruel.. "Goodnight." he whispered. Looking over at Zachs closed eyes. Finally he went silent and turned his eyes back to the window. Watching the light peek through the fabric until he could bring himself to sleep.
Zach lay quietly for close to fifteen minutes, his eyes closed, hands still resting on his chest. He couldn't sleep and he was pretty sure that no amount of just laying here would fix the problem. He knew what that problem was and he knew how to fix it. He just had to build himself up to it. Or he had to get up and run like fuck... It was this question he spent the next five minutes trying to answer before he slowly opened his eyes and turned his head to look at Mike.
The other man had his eyes closed and was lying in pretty much the same position as he was. But Zach was fairly certain he wasn't asleep either. His breathing hadn't changed since they'd laid down. Turning his eyes back up to the ceiling Zach could feel his hand shake slightly as he pushed the covers down his body so that the edge of the quilt rested at his hips. He pushed his shirt up quietly and revealed part of his torso. Tanned and firm but with one very obvious imperfection.
As he lay there, checking that Mikes eyes were still closed, which they were. He ran his fingers lightly over the thick sinewy scar tissue that ran along his stomach. It was about six inches in all, but not straight like a surgical scar would have been. It was jagged and torn looking. As though someone had ripped through his flesh into his body. Which as it turns out is exactly what had happened.
He stopped tracing it with his fingers and gently reached out to take one of Mike's hands. The one closest to him, his fingers wrapped around it as he lifted it up. He still hadn't moved his eyes from the ceiling. He couldn't look at Mike while he told his story. He'd never told anyone about it. Not the whole thing like he was planning to do now. And for the love of god he could not work out why he needed so badly to tell it now. All he knew was that he did.
He brought Mikes hand to his stomach, placed his fingers on the scar. His own hand resting on top of Mikes, pressing it down onto his skin. The warmth from Mikes hand felt so good in the cool air of the hotel. But Zach was trembling because he was so nervous about what he was about to say. He paused then and just held Mikes hand to his stomach, letting Mikes fingers trace the scar if they wanted to.
"I got this the day my mother died..." He muttered in a strangled voice. He was working very hard to keep the emotion out of it. To steady it, he hoped it was working. "I would have gone with her if..." He paused, it was hard to remember who had done this to him and his mother, let alone say the name out loud, "....Adam had had a little more time..." He all but whispered the name. It broke him to think about it and now he was determined to talk about it. He hoped to god Mike didn't say to much as he paused to reorder his thoughts so he could continue. He needed to get this all out without to much interference or he would just shut himself up again... then again, he might need Mike to push him a little to continue he was so confused about what the hell he was doing or why.
Mike found himself drifting off, not into sleep but thought. Not about anything deep or important, just random things. How was his mother, did they take his cat and give it to a good home, hoped that his truck was being taken care of. These things popped in and out of his mind like changing the channels on a television. The only station he kept going back to, Zach. He wondered, what would become of the man when he told Mike to hit the road after the one week. Sure he would go about his business, hunting, sleeping, whatever. But Mike would be out on his own, always wanting to know if he was alright, or safe.
Lost in these scattered thoughts he felt the slightest touch of his hand, and then felt it moved. He opened his eyes and looked down at what he was led to. Zachs stomach. His heart went about a million a minute. Then he opened his mouth to speak but what came from Zachs mouth stopped him dead. Mike ran his thumb along the jagged, scarred skin and looked horrified up a the man. Something had taken his mother, and left him with this.
"What happened?" he whispered through the lump in his throat, full of concern his eyes followed up Zachs body, stopping at his face and that is where they stayed. Adam? he questioned to himself. Had this been a lover, or something of the sort. Was this why he pulled himself away so many times... god Mike wanted to cry and he didn't even know the story yet. He made not one single move, only rubbed his one finger gently back and forth and waited quietly. Giving Zach the time he needed.
Zach finally turned his head to look at Mike and his eyes locked to his and he felt his breath catch. He'd never seen eyes like Mikes and they were so beautiful. He decided then and there that he had to tell him his story. Who knows it might do Zach some good to tell it to somebody else. God knows it was a weight he carried around every day.
He tore his gaze away from Mike and looked back up at the ceiling. His fingers interlocked with Mikes. Holding tight to the hand that still rested on his stomach. He didn't know why but he knew he needed the contact right now. If he was really going to talk about this shit. He needed to know Mike was still there. Because he already knew he couldn't look at him as he spoke.
Zach drew in a deep breath and decided that he had to go right back, to when it all started. To when he lost Adam... "Adam was my partner in the NYPD when I used to be a cop. We had been put together as partners right out of the academy which is rare. Cause normally a rookie is teamed up with a veteran. We used to say it was fates way of bringing us together. It used to make us laugh. We had been working together about a year when it became more than just friendship and work. I've never loved anyone the way I loved Adam. He was the love of my life. And he loved me just as much.
We never told anyone on the force. Gay cops still got a real hard time back then. We weren't even sure it was allowed. So we kept it quiet. It wasn't hard, even when we moved in together, its not unusual for two young cops, working their way up to room together." Zach paused and breathed deeply. He had not told anyone about how he and Adam had met or their early time together. "We were together for almost five years" He continued "When Adam and I were called to investigate a report of domestic violence. Turns out a demon had possessed the body of a young girl. This kid was only five Mike, and the demon had used her to kill her whole family. It was the worst thing I had ever seen.
Up until that time at any rate. Anyway, the little girl came after us when we arrived. She got to Adam first, snapped his neck, her eyes turning black. He just sort of... crumbled onto the ground. I can't remember what happened next really. I know I was screaming and when I did finally come round to my senses, I was holding Adam in my arms and the girl sat shivering in corner crying. The demon had left her. Why it left me alive I still don't know. Anyway, I knew then that what ever had killed the girls family, whatever had killed Adam wasn't natural. It wasn't human. So after that moment, I quit the NYPD and I went to search for anyone who could tell me about what the hell had happened. About what was out there."
Zach stopped again and squeezed Mikes hand again, the gentle feeling of his thumb stroking his stomach more soothing than he'd have thought such a small gesture could have been.
"So that is who Adam is and what happened to him" He said quietly when he started talking again. "It was his ghost who gave me the scar, who almost ripped me apart with his hands. It was his ghost who killed my mother. I couldn't protect her, I couldn't even save myself. If Adam's ghost hadn't disappeared when it had I'd have been dead too. He was, as you can see, pretty close to killing me. I found out later that it was a seal of the Apocalypse being broken. That is what brought Adam's ghost back, that is why he was so violent and angry. It was all part of the spell to rise the wittinesses. The spell was broken and the ghosts went back to rest. Not in time to save my mother though..."
He stopped talking now and lay very quiet. He didn't know what he expected Mike's reaction to be. He didn't know how he was meant to feel now he'd told his story. Even if he hadn't mentioned his sister yet. And even if he'd left a bunch of stuff out. He'd still put it out there. He felt a silent tear fall down the side of his face onto the bed and he couldn't even bring himself to wipe it away. For once he didn't care if he was seen crying, Mike could think he was weak if he wanted. Zach really didn't care right now.
Mike felt a strange thrill run through him when Zach finally turned and looked at him. He could see the obvious pain in his eyes and it pained Mike in ways he never imagined something could. Of course he's seen his share of sad and heartbreaking things. Parents being called to the E.R and being informed that there child had been taken from them. There were countless stories like those, some nights he was driven to his car way out in the back of the parking lot to cry like a baby. He knew the pain in a persons eye's when it came to the loss of someone they loved. With Zach he wanted to make it better, to hold him tight and make the pain go away, even if it was for just a moment.
His face was soft and unjudging, small lines in his forehead formed slowly. The prominent brows he came to love about himself pressed together slightly the more he heard. How this man survived and found the strength to carry on was so amazing to him. After being so in love with Adam, being so close and happy and having that man ripped from him would have driven Mike mad. And then to see that same man as a ghost and having him murder your mother. There was a lot about this "world"; he kept calling it, that made him want to rethink his decision to become a part of it.
His mothers sweet, plump face just kept popping into his mind. Could he do this to her, put her in harms way for his own need to be courageous. But than again she was no more safe now then she would be if he backed out. He began to feel slightly panicked, but he knew it was right what he was going to do. This was right. He focused on the warmth beneath his fingers and the strong hand gripping his, needing to be strong right now he pushed away those fears.
The pained reaction that had become plastered on his face relaxed. It was the tear gliding down Zachary's cheek that caused him to move so suddenly that he hadn't even realized he'd done it. He was gently wiping away this tear. His hand moved from the scar and he propped himself up in his elbow. Facing Zach. There were no words that could have done this moment justice. His protective hand was there, one finger bent as it slowly went the wet path of the tear, drying it and anymore that may decided to follow. "Come here.." he mouthed. Pulling Zach gently to him into an embrace.
Zach felt himself stiffen as Mike pulled him into an embrace. It was not what Zach had been expecting and the shock of it took him by surprise. He lay in Mike's arms tense and cold for what felt like forever as his mind whirled. All he could do was ask himself why Mike was even still there beside him. Never mind why the guy would want to be closer to him, to hold him. Part of Zach had been so sure that his story would be to much for Mike, that he was hear it and bolt. Part of him had wanted him too.
But as he lay there held in strong warm arms, pulled close so his chest was pressed against Mike's. His head fell just below Mikes chin. As he remembered what it was like to be held, really held. It had nothing to do with sex or lust. No this embrace was all about comfort. Mike wanted to help Zach, but he knew words could never be enough. So he was doing this... he was holding him. And as these thoughts dawned on Zach he felt something inside him shatter. And suddenly he was beyond all thought, his mind became a blur as his body stopped fighting the embrace and instead fell into it. His body melded itself to the man before him. His arm wrapped around Mike's waist and pulled him closer, his head fell into the mans chest, nuzzling the soft material of his shirt. Even his legs molded themselves to Mike's and he clung to him like letting go meant losing everything.
He didn't really even realise just how hard he was clinging. His brain couldn't focus on anything expect the warm, safe feeling he was getting from being here in this mans arms. And then he was crying... or perhaps he'd been crying forever, Zach couldn't tell. He couldn't remember when the tears started. I could have been before he'd even started talking. But now he was sobbing into Mike's chest and his eyes were closed tight. It was a silent endless pain ridden sobbing that, but for the wet tears leaking onto Mikes shirt and the shuddering of his shoulders, would never have been noticed. It was the tears falling that for years Zach had not let fall. That he had kept bottled up inside himself. He finally let them all out. All it had taken was the kindness of a stranger, someone to reach out and take hold of him as though they really cared.
Mike felt the fight in Zach as he held on to him. This time he wasn't letting go so easily. Not when he knew this was the right thing to do, he felt it was what this man needed. He could tell Zach had been holding this all in. God knew how long it'd been that he's talked about this, that was if he ever has. Then it was like something changed all of a sudden, and he felt willing arms wrap around him. He took in a quick gulp of air and held on tighter.
The release of all these emotions was dizzying and he was glad to be laying down. He nuzzled his nose in Zachary's hair and breathed in the sweet scent of him. To feel him so close, to let him sob openly and have it be alright was the most amazing thing. He felt warm and almost at home. His body fit Zach so perfectly, no awkward uncomfort what-so ever. Their bodies melted together. Filling the icy cold cracks between that seemed to be where fear and pain lived and burrowed.
The warmth they created snuffed that out. Mike pressed his hand on the small of Zachs back, running it up slowly and stopping at the back of his neck. Letting his fingers tangle themselves up in his hair. The same soft, sweet smelling stuff he had his lips pressed to. "I'm so sorry." he breathed in a soft husky, strained voice. He to had begun to weep silently. Hot tears fell down his cheeks and he let them.
Zach wasn't sure how long it took. How long he lay crying into Mike's shirt. All he knew was that he couldn't stop and he didn't ever feel like moving. He felt warm and completely safe for the first time since he'd lost Adam. He never imagined he'd find someone else who could get to him like this guy was. And he knew that he should have been terrified by it like he had been early. But right now he didn't have the energy to worry about that. And he really, really didn't want to ruin this feeling. Not right now anyway.
As his tears started to dry up he began to breath more slowly and his eyes grew heavy even while they were shut. As he rolled his head to the side so that his ear was pressed firmly to Michael's breast he felt sleep pulling at him. He was so warm and comfortable... more comfortable than he'd been since he could remember. God he was torn between wanting to sleep and for once he thought he might not be plagued with the normal nightmares, and trying to stay awake because he didn't want to miss a second of this feeling.
He couldn't really speak because his mind was so exhausted that coherent thought wasn't an option. But he managed to mumble out a "Thank you" before he couldn't hold himself awake any longer. He was vaguely aware of pulling Mike even closer and snuggling into him a little deeper. Before his mind when black and he feel into the deepest sleep he may have ever had. There were no dreams, not pain, just long over due, glorious sleep...
Mike took in a deep breath and let it out. It felt good to breath of his own free will now. Zach fell asleep, and the only way Mike could tell was he began to relax and had stopped crying. Like a baby who's exhausted themselves, the only thing to do is let sleep take them and wake renewed. Feeling the man drift off brought about the same in him.
He needed to sleep. To be right here holding Zach and keep him safe, how ever safe he could manage. In an attempt to be very quiet, not wanting to disturb anything he pulled his hand away and reached behind his head, wiggling his fingers around and blindly grabbing a pillow. He stuck it under his head and then curled his arm around Zachs waist.
His chest ballooned with air when he yawned. No matter how hush hush he tied to be there was no about of control that could have kept him from letting out a groaning sound and stopping his body from shaking and tensing as he yawned. He moved his head back and rested it on the fluffy soft pillow and closed his tired eyes. Sleep came like a tidal wave, sweeping him away before he knew it.
*******
Authors Note: So this was a pretty epic Chapter for Zach. Pretty angsty and emotional. Let me know what you think guys please? Love comments! xoxo