Rock Me

Warning: Rape, Angst, Slash, Past child abuse, H/C, Non-con, Torture

Disclaimer: I don't own them and I don't make any money off of writing this stuff. I do it for the people who enjoy reading them.

Rating: NC-17

Spoilers: Up to and including Asylum

Sam just stared at his brother, trying to figure out how to respond. He remembered his dad told him to do whatever Dean had asked, but that was before he had tried to kill him.

His dad said everything had changed. Maybe this had, too. Either way, he knew he couldn't do it and he just shook his head. "No, Dean. I'll never hurt you while I'm in my right mind."

Dean blinked once, then twice, then looked around. Then he stood up. "Is this a joke? I do what you say every year!" He grabbed Sam and hauled him up. "Fuck you! Don't do this to me!" He threw him against a wall and sat back down on the couch again, suddenly fearful.

Sam moaned at the pain in his back and slid down the wall, trying to see what the hell Dean was up to. Then he looked up to see someone else walking into the room. It was Jess. His eyes widened and he tried to speak, but he was too stunned to see her walk over to Dean and begin kissing him. Okay...what's going on here?

Jess frowned and looked over at Sam and then back at Dean. "Sorry, he was just having a little fun with you." She stood and dragged Sam over to one of the chairs. Sam wanted to mention that she'd gotten a hell of a lot stronger since she'd died, but felt that just might make him look more crazed than he actually was at the moment.

Nope, apparently things can get weirder... He glared at the man who entered the room, certain that he was up to no good. It wasn't his mannerisms or his aura that gave it away. It was the fact that he was wearing his own face.

"I couldn't resist. Now that we have the real deal here..." He leaned over and kissed Jess and she took her place near the real Sam.

Dean looked up at the fake Sam and then gasped before looking at his brother. "Sammy?" His eyes widened and he started to get up, but the lookalike pushed him back down.

"No distractions!" He bellowed and made Dean and Sam jump. This time he didn't sound nearly as much like Sam as he did the man who had abducted Sam earlier that evening.

The thing sat down beside Dean again. "Now...you know how I like to do this."

Dean just shook his head, still in shock. "I can't...he can't see this."

The thing sighed and pulled out the dagger that had been fastened to his belt. He threw it so quickly that Sam didn't know that anything had happened until he realized that Dean was staring at him in horror and Jess was giggling and pointing.

Sam looked down to see the hilt of a dagger sticking out of his stomach. As he gasped, blood began to bubble from the wound. He looked up, still not feeling the pain.

"Should I let him feel it, Dean?"

Dean shook his head. "No...no, I'll do it." He took a deep breath and hugged the demon tight. Then he pulled back to look into its eyes, his voice shaking. "I need you to do something for me, Sammy."

The creature smiled and glanced at Sam to watch his reaction. "Anything, Dean."

Dean just nodded in understanding. "Blow my head off."

And so he did.

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Sam had never remembered screaming so loud in his life. He watched his doppleganger pull out the gun and point it at Dean's forehead.

He saw the back of Dean's skull explode outward and felt the splatter of bone shards, brain matter, and blood hit his face from the destruction.

He watched Dean fall back and off of the couch and then stared at his face. His eyes were wide open and staring at nothing and the blood pooled around him, soaking his hair and staining the wood under him.

Sam didn't know what he was doing, but he yanked the knife from his stomach and charged at the thing sitting on the couch, laughing at the image of Dean's body. Just before he plunged the knife into the creature's throat, he found himself instead about to fall forward into a chasm.

He tried to right himself, but couldn't. He pitched forward, knife now gone, into the darkness. His only thought was, Please let me die. I can't stay here without my brother.

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The creature looked at Jess and held out his hand. "See what trouble you cause?"

She shrugged. "Yes, well, I thought this would be a more appropriate form this time. Unlike you, I enjoy using the moment to decide what I should be."

"You know I like a plan, darling. This is our most strongest time. Should we go help poor Sammy understand what he's done?"

She sighed. "All he's done is open up the doorway for this to end."

"We've had Dean for years. I'm not willing to give him up that easily."

"You can't interfere. It's part of the binding."

He groaned in frustration. "You and that damn binding. You know, if you would have just let me see him, this wouldn't be a problem."

"Don't start with me, Abaddon. I'm in no mood for this argument."

He wanted to slap her, but he didn't dare get her turned on so early in the night. "Fine, but now we may lose them both. I hope you're prepared for that."

She smirked. "Or...we may finally get to take them home."

He laughed and kissed her deeply, pulling her with him into the abyss from which he came.

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Sam grunted as he landed on a stone floor. It only felt as if he had fallen a short distance, but he knew that wasn't possible because of the length of time that had passed.

He touched his stomach to try and see how much longer he had to escape before he died and frowned when he still felt no pain.

His shirt was covered in blood and he couldn't figure out how he had survived this long.

He ripped open his shirt and moved closer to one of the torches on the wall of the seemingly circular room. His hands brushed over his flesh and he felt that his madness must be complete by now.

There was no wound and no scar. Only blood.

He growled in frustration and grabbed the torch, using it to see what was going on around him. He found that he wasn't in a room, but a passageway with a rounded end. He began to walk further down the area until he saw a door with an odd symbol on it. It looked like a flame, but he couldn't be sure because it seemed to fade in and out of existence.

He pushed open the door and nearly dropped the torch. He would have cried out, but his throat was still raw from screaming at his brother's death. Instead, he found a place to mount the torch and stumbled forward to fall on his knees in front of the stone altar erected there. He started to sob and then whispered to the still form upon the stone who was breathing softly as if in sleep. "Dean..."

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Dean heard the whispered plea, but couldn't respond. It always took him a few moments to convince himself that he had to wake up. Every damn year that thing blew his head off and every year he tried to prepare himself for the pain, but it never worked.

He began to understand why the monster had chosen that way of bringing him here. It hurt like a bitch and Dean thought that people who really died so horribly were the lucky ones because they weren't forced to wake up from the headache later.

He bit his tongue as he remembered his father's friend who had done just that the year he was ten. Nobody was lucky when someone was forced to see suicide as their only choice, he reminded himself. It was why he'd never taken that route.

He pushed away the morbid thoughts and focused instead on the sound of sobbing next to him. That was new. He opened his eyes and gasped at the light. Shit! Bastard is usually kind enough to keep me in the dark until the pain gets better.

He sat up slowly and swung his legs off the side of the altar. He covered his eyes and carefully opened them again, trying to adjust slowly. He glanced over to his side and saw Sam with his head buried in his arms, shaking with the emotional pain of his brother's supposed resurrection. He placed his hand on the back of Sam's head. "It's okay, baby brother. I'm alright."

Sam jerked his head up and nearly ended up with Dean's finger in his eye, but he didn't care at the moment. He just grabbed Dean and held on for dear life. "What happened? What was that? Dean, you're not dead! Are you dead? Am I dead? Is this hell?"

Dean felt his head start to throb harder. "Wait..wait...I'll tell you what I can in the time we have left. I honestly don't know how this is going to play out now that you're here."

Sam nodded. "Go ahead. I'm listening." He noticed that his voice wasn't as raspy as earlier, like he was healing quickly.

"Okay, this guy who looks like you? His name is Abaddon."

"No way...."

"Yeah, the Revelation seven headed ten horned demon guy. I was a bit in doubt myself when he first told me."

"What changed your mind?"

"He proved it. And no, I'm not getting into it. You're just going to have to trust me on that one."

Sam nodded. "Fair enough. But why does he look like me?"

"He didn't always. He looked like Dad when I was a kid. Then he started looking like you the year I turned 18." His voice faltered at that and it was obvious that he didn't want to talk about that time yet. "Anyway, one day you left and I checked up on you right before coming here. Yet you still showed up. That was four years ago and it was the first time I realized that it was him and not you and dad that were here with me."

"You mean you thought we knew?"

"No, I thought you were possessed for that one time out of the year and I did what I needed to just so you could stay safe."

"Did Dad know?"

"No. I didn't want him to know what went on here and I didn't want him to know that I thought he was helping out unwittingly."

"Okay, so let me get this straight. Whatever happens here, this thing took on dad's form and then mine and you thought it was really us, but that we were under this guy's control, right?"

"Yeah, Sammy."

"And you didn't tell us once you found out because you didn't want us to think that you had thought that we were really here because...."

"Because it would just bring up more questions and I didn't want to answer them. Anyway, would you like living with the knowledge that I believed you were capable of hurting me?" His face fell and he looked away, things finally clicking into place.

"But I do now so what's the difference?"

"Stop. That's not what I meant."

"I know, but maybe that's why things have changed. This guy gets off on making you think that I'd kill you and now I've made it real."

Dean snorted a small laugh, but was obviously not being humorous. "Trust me, Sammy...that's not what gets this guy off."

He stood up and stretched, forcing his muscles to recover from the death state that he had been in to transition from one dimension to another. "You know, we're still in the house."

"I figured that, but how?"

"Dimensional shift. That place is a power source. The house and barn have never been new. It looks like that to keep people away. Granted, if anyone tried to look at the house to buy they'd be scared off pretty quick. And I checked on the house and it still has an owner so nobody can bulldoze it. It's a pretty nice setup."

"You're acting like you admire him."

"I guess I do."

"Dean, he shot you in the head."

"Yeah, and he's never welched on the deal we made when I was five years old, Sammy. He's never turned away from his promise."

"Whoa...what promise? Dean...what did you do?"

Dean sighed. "I spend time with him every year so he's not lonely for his son."

Sam shook his head. "Who's his son?"

"I just told you....I am."


TBC......

Don't hate me! I told you it was going to get weird!