The book of Dendeyra

"Cool", Abby commented, one of her bright smiles lighting up her face. "I always thought, that you had to have some sort of siblings - you are way too comfortable with other persons to have grown up alone. I have proof now, because I can see that there's a close bond between you", she added with a knowing look at Tony and the three sisters.

For a moment the four of them only blinked at the young goth, then Piper, Phoebe and Tony smiled at each other, clearly remembering their time together when they were younger. Paige instead now seemed kind of sad, because she hadn't been there with the others. She didn't have any memories of Tony as a child or young boy, only getting to know him after she learned of her true heritage after Prue's death.

The gentle grip of warm, strong hands around hers caused Paige to snap out of her sad musings and she looked up in astonishment. Directly into kind deep green eyes, which smiled at her with unhidden affection. "Even if we don't know each other as long as Piper, Phee and I, that doesn't mean I love you any less, Paige. We will make our own set of memories within time", Tony quietly told her. The earnest expression on his handsome face and the reassuring squeeze he gave her hands supported the honesty of Tony's words.

Then a mischievous grin lit up in the young man's features and he added: "And if you are good, I'll tell you some stories about the troubles Phee always managed to get into as a child…"

"Anthony Matthew DiNozzo!", Phoebe cried out in mock-indignation, glaring at her cousin. "You will do nothing of that kind or I will tell Paige some of the things you did when you were younger!" Tony just smiled impishly at the brown-haired woman from his kneeling position in front of Paige, teasing Phoebe: "I'm cowering in fright, dear cousin, really I am." It was clear to see that he was unconcered by Phoebe's threatening.

Crossing her arms Phoebe glowered darkly at the young man, before suddenly a glint entered her brown eyes which made her sisters, Leo and Tony wary. They knew that expression only too well. "You will, Tony, you will", Phoebe smiled wickedly. "I think it's time that I confess a certain secret to Gran…you know about that day when you…"

Tony's eyes widened and he seemed to blanch slightly, clearly knowing what his cousin was talking about. Shaking his head, he exclaimed quietly: "You wouldn't…", whereupon Phoebe just raised an eyebrow and smirked evily at him.

"Geez, Phee! You are a mean, mean woman", Tony said.

"I know", Phoebe replied and added: "And don’t you just love me for it."

Tony studied her for a long moment, then sighed and confessed honestly: "Yes, I do", gaining a brilliant smile from his cousin.

"You are aware that there are certain things Tony knows about you, that Gran would love to know too, aren't you?", Piper suddenly questioned her sister. "Things that are equally as important as the secret you just indicated, Phoebe."

The mentioned young woman looked at her sister and replied indignantly: "I don't know what you are talking about, Piper. And even if you were right, Tony wouldn't give away my secrets." The last sentence was said with deep conviction, indicating that Tony had to know many of Phoebe’s secrets for her to be so sure about his talents in keeping them. The young Italian just smiled, love and affection making his eyes glow when he looked at Phoebe.

Piper sighed and scowled lightly at her sister: “Well, I know that he won’t…but I’m really not so sure in regard to you, Phoebe. Threatening him with Gran…really!”

Phoebe just rolled her eyes and huffed. “Thanks for the vote of confidence, sis. Nice to know how you think about me…as if I would ever really sic Gran on Tony about his secrets!” The brown-haired woman shivered slightly and added: “No need for one of her lectures…I think we had enough of that when we were children.” Tony smirked at that, but nodded emphatically. Even Piper shuddered a bit and agreed.

Paige and Leo looked at each other and chose to needle the other three at a later point about this topic in more depth. It seemed as if the sisters and Tony had been subjected to more than one of Penelope’s famous lectures when they were younger – and the stories which went with that memories were surely amusing.

Tony’s teammates had watched the whole exchange with mounting curiosity. They knew from the files about the Halliwell-sisters that Paige was only the half-sister of Piper and Phoebe. Her double name and Tony’s earlier soothing words to the young woman confirmed that information. But that didn’t mean their fellow agent’s connection to Paige wasn’t equally as deep as the one to the other two women. It was only different…not rooting in childhood memories of silly adventures or a shared awed respect of Penelope’s ‘lectures’, but build on honest affection of equal adults.

Gibbs sipped his coffee and silently mused on the behaviour of his second-in-command. Tony was totally relaxed in the company of his relatives; as open and unguarded in his emotions as the older man had ever seen him. Sure, Tony seemed easy-going and friendly to almost everyone he met, but to gain entrance to his innermost thoughts and feelings one had to prove himself worthy first. And Gibbs admitted to himself that to gain the amount of intimacy Tony shared with his cousins, he would give almost everything. He wanted to be the one who was aware of what those secrets Phoebe knew about entailed; wanted to be the one Tony confided in. He wanted to be the person Tony looked at with that unhidden love and devotion in his beautiful green eyes.

Gibbs scowled silently at himself and tried to reign in his emotions. He had no right to be jealous of Phoebe and her sisters, had no right to claim any part of Tony for himself. But didn’t he long to have that right…to call Tony his. His partner, his soulmate.
His to protect, to cherish and to be the one he could give all his love to. The one whom he could lean on, who would support him and surround him with strength and warmth born of kindness…

Gibbs didn’t see Phoebe’s head turn towards him, when her empathy caught on the sudden whirl of emotions inside this seemingly cool and collected man. Her brown eyes narrowed while she contemplated what she could feel emoting from the silver-haired agent. Phoebe knew that Tony admired and deeply respected his superior, held great love for the older man in his heart. Her cousin had once confessed to her during one of his visits after his change to NCIS, that living up to the high expectations of one Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs was one of his major goals in life. That he knew he couldn’t have the older man’s love, but was satisfied to be considered his friend.

Phoebe had known even then that Tony deserved more, that her cousin cut himself short. Knew that if Agent Gibbs had managed to get so deep under Tony’s skin that the young Italian resigned himself to love him from afar to have the chance to be near the older man on a daily basis – than Agent Gibbs had to be special. And in Phoebe’s mind a special person had to recognize another special person. And now, sitting across from Tony’s boss, feeling the whirlwind of hidden longing and restrained jealousy the silver-haired agent’s face gave no clue about, Phoebe silently cheered. Well, well, well. It seemed as if Tony’s love wasn’t nearly as one-sided as he thought.

Before she could further delve into what to do about her revelation, Tony’s voice cut through her thoughts. “Well, back to the topic at hand – the reason, why you”, the young man said looking at his teammates, “came to San Francisco. Boss, you said you were thinking I had been kidnapped. Care to explain in more detail how you came to this conclusion – as well as the fact that you suspected my cousins of that dreadful deed?”, Tony questioned Gibbs.

Seeing the whole attention gathered on himself once more, the silver-haired agent sighed inaudibly at the amount of incredulity and plain curiousity Tony’s words had carried. His second wouldn’t be a happy camper when he heard of the mess his apartement had become in his absence.

He answered Tony’s question in his typical short, distinct way. “Yesterday, when Abby came to your apartement to take care of your plants, she and McGee found it literally in pieces. We aren’t sure, but we believe whoever it had been, was looking for something specific – and didn’t find it. Perhaps that’s why that somebody destroyed most of your possessions. And as to the fact that we suspected your cousins”, Gibbs added, “that’s because McGee and Abby managed to trace the last call on your – severely damaged, I might add - cell back to her”, the silver-haired agent nodded towards Phoebe. “While getting intel on Miss Halliwell, we found some information on several FBI files, which led us to believe that she and her sisters might be the group who broke into the Museum here in San Francisco.”

Everybody present winced when Gibbs mentioned that Tony’s apartment was literally a battle-field. Kate, Abby and McGee because they could vividly remember it, and Tony’s cousin’s because they felt sympathy for the young Italian. Tony had grimaced slightly when he heard the news, but then something seemed to come to his mind and his green eyes darkened dangerously. The young man growled something unflattering under his breath. Nobody understood what he was saying, but it definitely didn’t sound very nice.

Gibbs saw a flash of gold lurking in Tony’s eyes and wondered once more, why he hadn’t seen that powerful, but alluring colour mixing with his second-in-command’s forest-green depths before. He remained quiet and waited for Tony’s next reaction, because he knew from experience, that the younger agent would soon have more detailed questions.

Phoebe sensed Tony’s growing anger and placed a hand on his arm to calm him down. Looking at her, Tony exhaled slowly, then smiled a bit and nodded in reaction to her motion. His cousin gave him an encouraging smile, but then she frowned, when a unsettling thought came to her mind. “Do you think they were looking for…”, Phoebe trailed off with a quick look at Tony’s teammates, but gave him a pointed look, her behaviour indicating, that Tony knew what she was talking about without her having to finish her speech.

Green eyes narrowed, then darkened further when Tony seemed to zone out for a minute. Then he shook his head as if trying to get rid of a troubling thought and sighed deeply. “Perhaps”, he confirmed, “but I really don’t know. It could be just coincidence”, Tony offered another possibility, which gained him a raised eyebrow from Phoebe.

“Not bloody likely”, muttered Paige from her seat next to Piper, whose brown eyes like Leo’s hazel one’s held a troubled look. Tony turned his head to his younger cousin and smiled faintly. “Yeah”, he confirmed Paige’s disbelieving words. “But possible. One can always hope.”

“Optimist”, Piper sighed, her expression clearly worried. She wanted to add something, but stopped herself short, when she saw the calculating look in Gibbs’ blue eyes. The silver-haired agent had followed the – for his teammates and himself – very cryptic exchange between the cousins. The undercurrent of troubled resignation and exasperated anger prominent in each of their voices raised several warning flags in Gibbs’ mind. Tony and the sister’s seemed to know who could have been the one trashing his agent’s apartement – and if not that, they clearly suspected someone… which was more than the team had until now.

Raising a silver eyebrow, Gibbs gazed demandingly at his second, who steadily avoided his eyes and was biting his lip in deep contemplation. It was Kate, who finally got fed up first with being left out of the loop by Tony and his family. “What’s the matter, Tony?”, she questioned her partner. “You seem to know who broke into your apartement, so spill it.”

Her demand gained the female agent four disapproving, but at the same time understanding looks from the three sisters and Leo, whereas Tony simply said: “You should know, Kate, that a mere suspicion isn’t worth a damn. I don’t know who had the audacity to rearrage my apartement without my consent.”

“Tony!”, scolded Abby at her friend’s words. “Quit splitting hairs and trying to evade the real question. You know something.”

Tony cursed under his breath. It was difficult enough to evade Kate’s questions, but it was nearly impossible for him to disappoint Abby. The young goth had a way about her, which made him want to answer her honestly. Like with Gibbs. But to tell them of his suspicion about the identity of his unbidden visitors would mean to explain a whole lot more connected to that information. Like magic. Or his duty. His whole destiny.

And Tony wasn’t ready to share a secret he had so long kept to himself – the secret of the Charmed One’s. Because even if he would decide to tell his teammates about his own abilities and hope for their acceptance – Tony couldn’t and wouldn’t force his cousin to reveal their identy without any real need. On a need-to-know-basis, Gibbs and the rest of the team didn’t need to know.

“Tony?”, Abby’s voice interrupted the Italian’s musings.

Looking at his friend, Tony replied: “Sorry, Abs. But it’s complicated. And personal.”

The young woman cocked her head and blinked. Biting her lip, she commented: “But we are your friends, Tony. We could help you. Why do you keep secrets from us? Don’t you trust us?” The accusation in her words caused Tony to flinch in reaction. Shadows darkened his eyes and for a second he looked hurt and deeply troubled. But then the young man straightened visibly.

“You know that I trust you – all of you – with my life”, Tony told his teammates quietly, who looked at him in varying states of curiosity and concern. “But some things are…complicated. Very much so I am afraid. Telling you would not only affect me, but others too. So, please understand, that this is something I can’t tell you about.”

Abby pouted, but when she recognized the sadness in Tony’s eyes she relented. She didn’t want to hurt her friend. She only wanted to help him. But it seemed as if this matter wasn’t something where she would be able to do that. McGee remained quiet – partly because of the heavy glare Phoebe once more gave him and the rest of the team, daring them to pressure Tony further for an explanation. Partly because he realized, that questioning Tony on that matter would be fruitless.

Kate and Gibbs came to the same conclusion, worrying about their fellow agent. They both knew now, that the break-in into Tony’s apartement probably had something to do with the reason he had come to San Francisco to visit his cousins. A family matter. But this matter seemed to be a really troubling one. And especially Gibbs couldn’t help but wish that the younger agent would open up to him and ask for help. He couldn’t shake the feeling that Tony and his cousins had a big problem at hand.

But looking at the determined expression the young Italian had on his face, the silver-haired man decided to wait for a bit. Perhaps if Tony had time to think about it, he would change his mind and come to him. Yeah, as if that would happen, the cynic in Gibbs retorted. Tony could be as stubborn as the Senior Agent himself when it came to protecting people he cared about from the trouble he had managed to get into himself.

“It’s time for you to go”, Piper suddenly stated decisively. When Tony’s teammates looked at her with startlement and worry because of her sudden declaration, she added: “You can come back tomorrow morning. But for now, you know that Tony isn’t hurt but safe with us.”

Kate and Abby didn’t seem to like having to go, but didn’t argue. Tony gave them an encouraging smile to appease any hurt feelings, because even he had been a bit surprised at Piper’s words. But he felt, that Piper wanted to protect him from further demands of his teammates for now. Give him some time to come to his senses about this new troubling information and try to decide how to act about it.

The young Italian was glad to excape an outright interrogation on the matter, but knew that he would have to answer later to Gibbs about it. The older agent wouldn’t let him get away with the excuse of a personal matter forever. It wasn’t in his nature to simply let it go; and Tony knew how determined his boss got when a case involved somebody he considered a friend or family. And even if it amazed him again and again to be considered part of the group Gibbs had decided to call his own to care for, Tony knew he was. And that meant, he would need every minute he could get to think of something believable without neither getting on Gibbs’ bad side for not telling him the whole truth nor giving the older agent too much information and because of that getting his teammates in trouble.

Spirits, as if his life wasn’t complicated enough right now!

Sighing inaudibly, Tony showed his friends a composed façade he didn’t really feel. And seeing the piercing look in Gibbs’ blue eyes, even if the other man didn’t let his displeasure at being left out of the loop show on his face, the young man knew he didn’t fool his superior. Well, he never had been able to hide something from Gibbs – not for long anyway. The older man always seemed to know when something was troubling Tony.

It was one of the reasons the young Italian had fallen in love with Gibbs – he felt safe and cared for in the presence of the other man. Knowing he could always come to Gibbs and ask for help if he wasn’t able to solve a problem on his own. That was something decidedly comforting to know…but right now it only added fuel to Tony’s already conflicted emotions about consciously withholding information from his beloved boss. But it couldn’t be helped.

When the door fell shut behind Gibbs and the rest of the team, Tony’s shoulders sagged a bit. A tiny measure of the tension flowed out of his muscular frame, but his forest-green eyes still held a sad, troubled look. It wasn’t in his nature to deny his friends a honest explanation about his strange behaviour or keep things from them.

Sighing deeply, Tony rubbed his face with his hands and suddenly felt very tired. Staring into space he tried to come to terms with the messed-up situation and find a solution which would please both parties…knowing the practically non-existant chance to find such a one.

A gentle hand on his shoulder startled Tony out of his musings and he looked up into Piper’s deep brown eyes. He gave the oldest Halliwell a faint smile and said dryly: “Well, that went well.” Piper smiled back at him, the gesture widening when Paige snorted: “If you say so. Your teammates are strange, Tony. Thinking we would kidnap you…geez.”

“They had valid reason, Paige”, Leo amended quietly, “What Agent Gibbs told us about the state of Tony’s apartement is a troubling bit of information in regard to Tony’s encounter with the Lazarus demon some days ago. If our suspicion is right and it has something to do with Tony’s powers, then we have to act soon, before it will be too late.”

Tony nodded, a serious look in his green eyes. Phoebe sat down next to her cousin and looped her arm around his muscular frame. “They like and care for you very much, Tony”, the young woman tried to change the topic to a more pleasant one, knowing they wouldn’t be able to do anything about the other thing this evening.

“Your teammates may have acted a bit rashly, but it shows how much worth you are to them. And their wish to know about what caused you to keep us a secret to them and what trouble made you come to us now is another indicator for that care. I really like them, Tony…but you always hadgreat taste in picking out your friends.” When Tony raised a disbelieving eyebrow at her last sentence, Phoebe just rolled her eyes and specified: “Real friends.”

This caused Tony to finally nod in confirmation. He may have the occasional trouble with people he didn’t really know, but when one person managed to endear himself or herself to his heart, Tony was sure that this person was trustworthy and loyal. It was an instinctive diversion he had always made at first sight – declaring the new person he met either acquaintaince or real friend-material. While the first group would never get a chance to see Tony’s real persona, members of the second one would see more than the façade the young Italian put on for most of the world. Within time they would be allowed to see his hurts, his pain and insecurities, would be learning of old secrets and sharing new ones – essentially they would be invited into Tony’s circle of persons he loved and would protect with everything he had.

His grandfather had once told him, that such a group was called anam cara. Seelenfreunde. And Tony thought, that this description summed it up really beautifully.

Piper, Paige and Phoebe had watched the conflicting emotions Tony felt shadowing his eyes and flitting over his face. They knew what he was thinking about, and in Phoebe’s case she felt it too. And it hurt her to see her beloved cousin ripped apart between keeping their secret and wishing to be honest with his friends. Tony had always been very emotional, quick to help and friendly and open to almost everyone. And while he was good at presenting different personas undercover, Phoebe knew that the young man was a very honest person at heart.

Coming to a silent decision, Phoebe cleared her throat and then said: “Well, enough with thinking gloomy thoughts for today. If I remember correctly, Tony, you promised to cook for us tonight.” For a moment her cousin seemed startled at the change of topic again, then he smiled warmly at Phoebe and nodded. Standing up, he suddenly leaned down to her again and whispered: “You’ll really have to learn to be more subtle, Phee. But thank you.” With those words, Tony pressed a kiss on Phoebe’s head and went into the kitchen to prepare dinner for his family.

He didn’t see the looks which followed him until he vanished into the other room. Or heard Piper say: “Ok, out with it. What do you want to discuss, what Tony couldn’t hear?” And neither did he care about the discussion Phoebe caused, when she answered her older sister: “I think we should tell Tony’s teammates about our secret. It will be a lot easier on him…and I believe them to be trustworthy.”

Even if Piper, Paige and Leo agreed with Phoebe’s assessment of Tony’s friends, the implications and consequences of what she wanted to do had to be discussed. To tell non-magic people that magic really existed and wasn’t only a product of fairytales and superstition could result in real trouble... like the Halliwells had learned the hard way more than once. Not only the possible ways Tony’s teammates could react to that news had to be considered; the higher forces – like the Elders – wouldn’t be pleased at all if this decision was made on a whim.

It was nearly an hour later, when Tony stepped out of the kitchen, looked at his family with a faint smile and then questioned: “And – has the council decided on whatever had to be discussed? Are you now ready for a delicious dinner or do you need more time?”

Tony’s slightly sarcastic, but nonetheless understanding words caused Paige, Phoebe and even Leo to look at Piper. She was the oldest of the family and therefore had the last word in their discussion. The brown-haired woman silently regarded her cousin for a minute, who returned her gaze patiently with warm green eyes, then nodded decisively and said to Phoebe: “Alright. I agree to your proposal. With one condition.”

“An oath?”, Phoebe guessed correctly and smiled at Piper’s nod. “That’s no problem.”

“Somebody care to enlighten me what you are talking about?”, Tony questioned his cousins, with a dawning suspicion on the topic of their agreement. It was Piper, who answered him. “Phoebe, Paige, Leo and I decided, that we will tell your friends about the nature of our secret. We will tell them about the Charmed Ones.”

tbc...