Delusions

Delusions, Chapter Five

Hoshi's mad scramble from the bed was neither graceful nor swift. Tangled up in sheets and blankets, she stumbled from the bed, barely catching herself before she fell to the floor.

"Sweetheart? Are you ok?"

At the sound of Jon's voice, Hoshi took a couple deep breaths to calm herself. Not willing to look him in the face, her eyes automatically dropped, catching sight of his bobbing erection. She stared for a moment, gaping like a fish, before managing to look away.

"Fine. I'm fine," she replied, straightening, not realizing her nightgown was still wide open. "Bad dream."

"Are you alright now?" He came to stand beside her, all six feet four inches of tight muscle and broad shoulders and slim hips … Hoshi turned her back on him to stare out the window, trying to ignore the throbbing in her belly.

"Hoshi?" Wrapping his arms around her, Jon cupped a breast in each hand, fingers idly teasing the nipples. Hoshi sucked in a breath as he pushed his erection against her bottom, her head falling against his shoulder. Movement in the window caught her eye, refocusing she saw their reflection as Jon kissed his way across her shoulder, one hand skimming down over her stomach …

Oh God, oh God, oh God …

Just before Jon reached the curls between her legs Hoshi jerked upright. "Phlox!"

"Phlox?" Jon echoed in confusion as Hoshi buttoned up her nightgown with trembling hands.

"He said you couldn't exert yourself. No … extracurricular activities." Hoshi blushed as she made up the lie.

"None?" The plaintive sound in Jon's voice was rather sad.

"None." Hoshi's voice was emphatic.

"Not even oral sex?"

"I … ah …" Hoshi turned beet red. Instantly the metal image of Jon coming in her mouth as he called her name appeared; she could imagine the soft velvet feel of his cock, the salty taste of his semen … Hoshi stumbled over an answer, losing the upper hand.

"I'll talk to Phlox." Jon gathered a bewildered Hoshi into his arms. "It seems like forever since we've made love. I miss you." He gave her another spine melting kiss, breaking it off to grin at her.

"Duty calls however, so maybe later. Did you still want that shower?"

"Shower? Yes, I do." Walking into the bathroom, Hoshi was rather proud of the way her knees held up. Cold shower. Very very cold shower.

She stood under the icy spray until her skin turned blue, trying to make sense of her reaction to Jon. What is happening to me?

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"So Cap'n, how you doin'?" Trip watched in amazement as Archer finished his second helping at breakfast. The Captain hadn't been eating well recently, but you wouldn't have known it to look at him now.

"Never better. We're supposed to meet with the Bosrians later this week, right?"

"Uh, yeah. Everything seems to be under control, they sent over their protocols, and we did the same." Trip looked at T'Pol before continuing. "Ah, how's Hoshi doin'?"

"Fine. Why?"

"Er, she was just worried about ya, wanted to be sure she was ok too." Concerned about what had happened last night, and frankly curious as hell, Trip couldn't figure out a way to ask, even though Archer was his best friend.

"She's fine, I'm fine, everything is fine." Finishing his juice, Archer stood up. "I have to see Phlox, I'll be in my ready room the rest of the day." Nodding to the two officers, he walked out, humming a tuneless song.

Trip watched him go, then turned to T'Pol. "If'n I didn't know better, I'd say that man got the best lay in his life. But Hoshi would never …"

"I concur. We will have to keep watch over the Captain. I do not want the Ensign to be forced into a compromising position." Without another word T'Pol got up and left also.

Shrugging, Trip followed.

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Jon had talked to Phlox and while he couldn't convince the doctor to ok oral sex much less actual intercourse, he did get the go ahead for what was referred to as 'heavy petting', a term Phlox learned from Crewman Cutler.

Phlox had called Hoshi in after Jon had left, apologizing that he couldn’t restrict their intimacies further. "I had a hard time coming up with a reason why oral sex was out of the picture. I'm sorry, Ensign, you'll have to be creative in only going as far as you want to."

Hoshi had mumbled a thanks of sorts, and fled Sickbay, mortified beyond belief.

A week had past, and Hoshi felt she was living two lives. A professional one, where Jon was every bit the Captain, treating her the same way he had treated her before, perhaps with even more detachment. But after their shifts, when they were no longer on duty, Jon became the perfect husband; affectionate, open, attentive. Hoshi found herself both dreading and craving the end of the day when she stopped being an Ensign and became a 'wife'. The one silver lining to this cloud was that Jon's treatments were proceeding at a rapid pace, and he would be back to normal sooner than later.

Jon was a balm to her soul, and she was in serious danger of falling in love with him. She had to do something.

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"You're not wearing that flannel suit of armor again, are you? You used to sleep naked." Jon came over as Hoshi pulled her nightgown out.

"I'm cold at night." Hoshi held on to the garment as Jon tried to tug it out of her hands.

"I'll turn the heat up." Letting go, he rummaged in the drawer. "Wear this instead." Jon held up a jade green teddy.

Hoshi nearly snatched it from his hands. "I don’t think it fits anymore …"

"Try it on and see." He waited, expectant.

"I … I'm tired, Jon. Please …" Hoshi was almost panicking.

"Sorry, sweetheart." Jon gave her a hug and dropped a light kiss on her lips.

After they had gone to bed, Hoshi lay stiff and awake; Jon spooned against her, his hands possessive on her body. As soon as he was asleep, she moved to the other side of the bed, out from the addictive warmth of his arms.