Starting Over Again

 

Chapter 4 – Do you like me?

 

The next few days had passed fairly uneventfully, everyone doing their usual tasks, Mack helping out where he could and Sophie spending most of her days painting.  She’d attempted to speak to Mack about her ideas but he’d simply told her that until she answered his request he was going to make her wait.  When she’d then told him that she was going to accept his kind invitation he suggested that she leave telling him of her ideas until they actually had dinner.  Totally perplexed by this display she had warned him that she wasn’t the most patient of people only to be told that they would have to wait for dinner until they returned to Villefranche-sur-mer, he wanted it to be special and although Tavernes was encapsulating there wasn’t much in the way of excellence.  She knew he was teasing her but she was powerless to resist his charms, agreeing that their date would take place as soon as they made the trip back.

 

Most evenings they were left to their own devices, her brother and his family making excuses to leave the two alone to develop their friendship.  And to a point, it had worked.  Although they weren’t as close as Mack would’ve liked.  They were on good terms and things were only set to get better.

 

Sophie treated him as if he were an older brother never crossing the line that she’d set herself.  Not that she didn’t want to.  However, every time she felt ready to muddy the waters images of Jacques would take hold and she was unable to take it further.

 

Soon after they had been left alone by the family again that night, Mack had persistently pestered her about the lessons she still hadn’t given him.  When she’d finally had enough she tugged out an enormous cushion and battered him over the head with it.  “Oh, you shouldn’t have done that,” he taunted.

 

“Why not?”  She asked batting her eyes and biting her lip.

 

“Because,” he may have been older than her but he moved like greased lightening, catching both of her hands in one of his as he moved over her.  His other went to tickle her up her side, over her stomach and under her arms, she shrieked with joy, his touches increasing her state of excitement as he continued mercilessly.  He laughed at her as she unsuccessfully tried to get him to stop, he was far too strong for her and she knew that.  Finally, she stopped wriggling and looked up into his face, searching his eyes for any kind of indication of how he felt.

 

Mack allowed his heart to take over, his head falling toward her, his lips searching for hers and finding them.  He let go of her wrists, his hands reaching around her shoulders and into her hair as he lingered at her mouth, the tip of his tongue sliding over her lips in order to gain entry.  He felt her moan against him as she allowed him the access he sorely needed.  His tongue found hers, dancing together with delight as their kiss deepened.  Suddenly her hands were on his chest, attempting to prise them apart.  His head took over and he pulled back, searching her face for some kind of explanation.  “We can’t,” she simply stated, looking anywhere but at him.

 

“Why not?”  He was puzzled, letting her escape to the other side of the room.  “We were having fun.”

 

“That’s just it though, its only a bit of fun.  How long before it turns into something serious?”

 

“Sorry, Sophie, but I don’t understand your meaning?”

 

“Mack, it doesn’t matter.”

 

“Yes, it does.  I really like you.”

 

“You hardly know me.”  She span around, his look of total confusion not being lost on her.

 

“I know enough.”

 

She shook her head, “no, Mack.  You don’t?  There are things about me and my life …”

 

“That I’ll find out when the time is right.  I’m not bothered about your past, Sophie.  Same as you shouldn’t be bothered about mine.”

 

“My past is who I am.”

 

“No,” she sensed he was getting angry with her, “your past shapes you into who you may become.  Sometimes, you just have to say bollocks to it and get on with things.”  He turned from her and walked out of the house.

 

She stood still for a moment, shocked at his sudden outburst, before making to tidy up the room.  She heard footfall behind her hoping that Mack had returned to her.  Turning toward where the noise had come to rest she saw her brother in the doorway.  “Come here,” he held out his arms to her.

 

She went to him, tears falling as he cocooned her within his embrace.  “Did you hear?”

 

“Most of it, you know you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself?”

 

“I know, its just with everything that happened …”

 

“Yes,” he whispered against her hair, “I can understand why you’re apprehensive, but Mack is right.  Sometimes, you do just have to get on with your life.”

 

“But …”

 

“Sophie, no.  Listen to me, I know how much you want what Jenny and I have.  I see it on every occasion you spend time with the girls.  And what are you going to be like tomorrow, clucking around Maddie just because its her birthday.  The thing is you’ve always been looking in the wrong places for it to happen, and when it finally does you want to spend your life looking the other way because you’re afraid that he might actually be right for you.  He likes you, a lot.  A man knows these things.”  He nodded knowingly to put emphasis behind his words, pulling her chin up so that she was looking at him, “and I think you like him too.  Allow it to happen, Sophie, you might even enjoy it.”

 

“How can I?  I’m set for going back out into the fields tomorrow evening.”

 

“Take him with you, I’ll find that other tent and then he’s got no reason not to have those lessons he’s paid for, has he?”

 

“Ok, I’ll ask him.  Thanks, bro.”

 

“Just doing my job.  Now go, I’ll tidy up here.”

 

She kissed him before running from the house and down to the gites she occupied.  She slowed as she came to Mack’s door, silently listening to see if she could hear anything.  The bed creaked slightly as he shifted and she heard him sigh unsure if he was awake or asleep from the level of the tone and frustration.  She tiptoed past, as she had done on her early morning arrival the previous week and opened her door as quietly as she could.

 

After getting ready for bed she turned off all but her bedside light.  She sat beneath the covers of her duvet and settled herself against the pillows.  She reached over for her sketchbook and pencil, opening it and thumbing through the pages.  Her hand instinctively touched each of the drawings that she’d made over the previous few nights, each one a vision of Mack and his eyes that never seemed to stop changing colour.

 

She opened up to a blank page and closed her own eyes briefly, an image of him just before he was about to kiss her came into her head and her hand began to furtively create the picture that she had envisioned.  It wasn’t long before he was captured again within her book, her eyes growing heavy as soon as she had finished her work.

 

 

.oOo.

 

 

Mack had chosen a quiet corner to observe the goings on of a 9 year olds birthday, the screams of elation and sudden outbursts of French had got to him a little bit so he’d decided to nurse his developing headache as far away as he could without being missed.  His eyes scanned the courtyard for Sophie, knowing that she would be there somewhere looking after a niece or sorting out the food.  He spotted her, talking to an elderly gentleman, her animated chatter evident as she waved her arms about and smiled at her lone audience.

 

Mack hadn’t stayed angry at her for long, in fact it had passed by the time he had got into bed.  He’d not let on though, continuing the charade with her over the course of the morning until it was time for her to start the preparations for Madeline’s party.  He smiled to himself, she really hadn’t a clue what she did to him whatever his mood, she only had to flash her eyes at him and his heart was in his mouth.

 

“Penny for them,” he jumped, not only startled by Sophie’s voice interrupting his thoughts but by her close proximity.  How had she got so close to him so quickly without him even noticing?

 

“I was just thinking about you.”  She dropped her head slightly before catching his gaze upon her when she lifted her eyes up again.  “That for me?”  He asked pointing to the glass in her hand.

 

She nodded, her hair gently swaying like a curtain over her head as she handed him the drink, “real lemonade.  Hope you like it.”

 

He sipped at it, watching her as she positioned a chair next to him and sat down in it.  “Lovely, you not having any?”

 

“Too much sugar.”

 

“Oh,” he looked her over appreciatively, “when do you go back?  To the fields, I mean?”

 

“Tonight.”

 

“Oh,” his heart sank, “and when will you be back again?”

 

“In a week or so.”  She stopped short, unsure of how to ask him to come with her.  She remembered his words, “Sometimes, you just have to say bollocks to it and get on with things.”  “Mack?”

 

“Mmm,” he continued sipping at his drink, eyeing up the party.

 

“Come with me?”

 

Mack spluttered and coughed, his latest mouthful of lemonade shooting out of his mouth with the shock of her question.  “What the hell are you trying to do to me?”

 

“I’m sorry, the last thing I wanted was to make you choke.”  She patted and rubbed his back as he bent over in his chair, still coughing.

 

He sat back up, his face a picture of disdain.  “Last night, you pushed me away.”

 

“I know, I …”  He put his hand up to stop her.

 

“Sophie, you keep confusing me.  I don’t know if I’m coming or going with you.  It’s probably best if I stay here, get my head around things, allow you some space.”

 

“I don’t want you to give me any space.”

 

“Sophie.”  His tone was anxious.

 

She pressed her fingers to his lips.  “I’m sorry about last night.  I’m afraid of being hurt again and that’s why I reacted the way I did.  I like you too, Mack.  I just don’t know if its enough.  Come with me, please?  Maybe, if its just the two of us without any outside influences I can get over these obstacles I keep putting in my own way.  I just need some understanding and patience from you.  And we’ll be in separate tents.”

 

“Of course, wouldn’t want it any other way, I am still a gentleman.”  She smiled at his remark.  “Ok, I’ll come with you.”

 

“Sure?”

 

“Yes, I’d love to.”

 

“Good.  You’ll be ready to leave by 6?”

 

“Yes, if that’s the time my lady wants me to be ready by, then I have no option but to comply.”

 

 

.oOo.

 

 

After a 40 minute drive north, Sophie and Mack arrived at one of her favourite locations.  After parking her car by the old tumbledown barn, they erected the tents close to the lavender rows.  As they sat around the fire that Sophie had built, eating a salad that she’d made earlier and drinking tea, Mack chose to say something to lighten the mood.  “Haven’t been camping in years.”

 

“How long?”

 

“Over 20 years, went to Newquay with my brother and some of our friends.  Had a brilliant time.”

 

“That was when Newquay was lovely, we used to go with Mum and Dad.”

 

“You know Newquay?”

 

“Quite well, Steven and I were brought up in Devon before our parents died.  It was always a favourite holiday destination.”

 

“You ended up here when they died?”

 

“Yes,” a ghost of a smile touched her face.

 

“How old were you?”

 

“I was 15, Steven 18.  Needless to say he coped better than I did.  He went to university, I came here.  I loved it but I missed them all so much.  For a few weeks I felt like Steven had died too, couldn’t wait for him to come here during his holidays.”

 

“Would you miss France?”

 

“I’m not thinking of leaving.”

 

“But if you had a reason too?”

 

“Perhaps, but everywhere has its charms.  Sometimes I miss Devon, the little hidden away coves that only the locals know about, the moors and their rugged beauty.  I’m sure Manchester has some hidden gems.”

 

“The peaks are worth a look but most of the places are run down, small villages and towns that once thrived from industry now derelict because it’s too expensive to produce goods in the UK.”

 

“So why would you want to go back and start over?”

 

“Because what I do works.  The company that took over my factory, took over most of the others in the area.  Started producing some basic products which are fine for the larger supermarkets but the high end stuff eventually went by the wayside.  So there’s a gap in the market.  Imported products might be cheaper but the quality is terrible and there are still those stores, and ultimately their customers, that want to buy good British products.”

 

“You know, you haven’t really sold the north of England to me.”

 

“Wasn’t aware that I was supposed to be.  Besides why would you want to go?  This place is far lovelier than anything the north of England has to offer.”

 

“It would all be part of getting to know you better.”

 

“Then you would have to return the favour, you would have to show me Devon.”

 

She held out her hand, “deal?”

 

He took it and shook vigorously, “deal.”

 

She yawned looking up to the inky sky above her.  Clouds were beginning to form, a breeze had lifted and the moon seemed watery.  “Looks like we may be in for a storm, if you get scared you know where I am.”  She mocked him as she got to her feet, kicking dirt into the fire to put it out.  “I’ll see you in the morning, otherwise.  Goodnight.”

 

“Goodnight, Sophie.”

 

As she opened her tent to get in, she looked back at his retreating form as he was getting into his.  “Mack?  Don’t forget to keep your shoes on.  We should be ok, we’re close to the lavender and we’ve kept the tents closed up but if a scorpion decides you’ll make a great meal he’ll not think twice.  Check your sleeping bag too.”

 

If there was one thing he couldn’t get used to it was the knowledge that he could be killed off in the wilderness by a black insect 4-6 inches in length.  “Oh, and if you think you’ve been bitten call me immediately, Ok?”  Sophie called out as an after-thought.

 

“Yes, I do that,” he replied avidly searching the ground for anything that moved.  “Night, Sophie.”

 

“Night, Mack.  Mind the ‘bugs’ don’t bite.”

 

He’d slept soundly until he’d heard the clatter of thunder off in the distance.  He hadn’t heard any rain so he felt it must be on its way toward them.  Within a few minutes the rain started and not just a normal shower either, a torrid downpour.  As he’d kept most of his body inside the covers he was stunned when an unexpected couple of drops of rain fell onto his face.  He put on the torch and inspected the canvas above his head.  “Shit!”  He shouted, sitting up and realising that his tent was acting like a colander.

 

“Are you ok in there?”  He heard Sophie call out.

 

“No, this tent is pissing in water.”

 

“Shit.  You best come over here then.”  Her voice seemed clearer and closer, she’d obviously opened her tent up.  “Is all your bedding soaking?”

 

“Yes.”  He crawled out of his tent and quickly made his way over to the car, grabbing his bag and making his way back to Sophie’s tent.  “I’m bloody soaking too, my clothes are wet through.”

 

She ushered him in, zipping up the door after he’d climbed through the opening.  Thankfully her tent was slightly bigger than his and he had the chance to move around a bit more freely even with two bodies in it.  “God they are,” she said, placing her hands over his clothing to inspect them for herself, “come on, get out of them.”

 

He flashed her his cheeky grin, “gonna help me?”

 

“I think you’re very capable of doing that yourself.”  She sat back, her arms folded over her chest, never letting her eyes drop from him as he undressed in front of her.

 

“Even my underwear is soaked,” he moaned, “if I didn’t know better I’d have thought you’d have done this on purpose.”

 

“I certainly didn’t,” she said, helping him get a towel and change of clothes from his bag.  “But my brother may have.”

 

He looked back to her as he attempted to remove his boxers from underneath the towel.  “Was this his idea?  Me coming with you?”

 

She laughed to herself, “not really, but he planted the damn seed.  I can turn around you know, if you’d rather I looked away.”

 

“I’m not bothered one way or the other, I’m only shielding myself so that I don’t embarrass you.”

 

“I’m not easily embarrassed, I’ll have you know.  I might even like it.”  He caught her gaze, she could tell he was silently laughing at her own suggestion.   “I said that out loud didn’t I?”

 

He sniggered, “you know you did.  Another reason to keep myself hidden from you, once you get a taste for me you might not want to put me down.”

 

“Stop it.”

 

“No, I’m enjoying myself.”

 

“At my expense.”

 

“I’m not going to do it at mine, am I?”  He stopped, hoping to hold onto the sneeze that was threatening but he had no luck.  “Aitchoo.”

 

“Serves you right.”

 

“What for?  Aitchoo.”

 

“For taking the piss.  Come on, lets get you wrapped up.  You’ve obviously picked up a chill from the damp.”  She helped him quickly get dressed in a pair of dark grey jogging pants and a navy fleece pullover, before helping him under the makeshift double bed she’d made with her sleeping bag and blanket.

 

“Wait, I haven’t got my shoes on.”

 

“You don’t need them.”

 

“What?”

 

“I was pulling your leg, Mack.”

 

“Why you little …”  He pulled her toward him helping her to scramble in under the blanket beside him.  “Is there anything else you feel you should tell me, before I make sure you join me with this cold?”

 

“I don’t think there is.”  She looked like she was thinking about it, “no, nothing else.”

 

“Good,” he pulled her to him, applying the softest rapid kiss he could bring himself to give her before he had to cover his mouth and sneeze again.  She giggled, turning in his arms and lying on her back.  They counted the storm coming closer, delighted in the lightening as it exposed both of their faces to the other in its ethereal light, cuddled closer as the cooling rain continued to lash down and the wind got stronger.  It took a good half hour for it to pass and in that time Mack and Sophie had shared each others joy and anxiety at the prospects of the weather whirling around them outside.

 

He kissed her once more before she finally turned over and allowed him to spoon his body against her, his arms wrapped around her waist.  For the first time in a long time she felt safe and with the most unexpected character of a man she could imagine.  She covered his hands with hers and felt his fingers twine around her own.  After brushing her hair back from her shoulder, he kissed the exposed skin before replacing his hand where it had come from; holding each other they fell asleep.