A kiss is just a kiss

The timing of Guerrero’s personal epiphany was far from ideal, but as he collapsed beside Paul he knew with a sudden unshakable certainty that he wasn’t just infatuated with Chance, he loved him. He was in love with Chance. With the shock of this revelation still reverberating through his mind, Guerrero got dressed, paid up and got out as quickly as his post-orgasmic stupor would allow. He managed to get away without having to face Lady Heather, but he was sure he saw her standing smiling in the doorway as he sped off in his rental car. He wasn’t exactly happy about the fact that she knew about his feelings for Chance, and if she was anyone else he would have put a bullet in her head just to be sure that the information didn’t fall in to the wrong hands, or any hands for that matter. Lady Heather’s discretion, however, was legendary. It wasn’t merely a result of good business practice, it was a matter of personal pride. Guerrero suspected that after working in a job where she had seen it all and done it all, Lady Heather probably got off on keeping other people’s secrets. Guerrero could trust her, inasmuch as he could ever really trust anyone. Lady Heather was well aware of Guerrero’s feelings about keeping his personal life private and she wouldn’t have even told Paul his name. Even the note she sent him had only been addressed to ‘G‘.

Guerrero decided to continue driving the rest of the way back to San Francisco. He needed the time to assimilate what he’d discovered. After a lifetime of trying to avoid any kind of serious relationship with a woman he’d somehow managed to miss the fact that, somewhere along the line, he’d fallen for Chance. Carla had been the closest thing to a relationship he’d ever had, but that was only because she’d gotten pregnant as a result of their fairly casual affair. Due to Carla’s line of work, he’d had a contact run a paternity test at a private lab to verify the child was even his, and it was only because of their child that he had any contact with her. As the mother of his child he cared about her, but love had never been part of the equation, and for that he’d always been grateful.

On the long drive home Guerrero gave up on trying to pinpoint when exactly his respect and affection for Chance had turned into something more. Looking back it was easy to see that a lot of his decisions over the years, both personal and professional, had been made with Chance’s welfare in mind. He watched over him from the moment Joubert first brought him into the fold and he’d had his back ever since he walked out. There hadn’t been a time in years when Guerrero hadn’t known exactly where Chance was, even when he pulled an Ace Ventura and hid out in an ashram. Neither of them had ever acknowledged it, but Guerrero’s life pretty much revolved around Chance.

He still didn’t know why he had kissed Chance. The best he could come up with was that it was his subconscious giving him a wake-up call. He knew Chance and Ilsa had feelings for each other, so maybe, on some unconscious level, he was throwing his hat into the ring before it was too late. Guerrero had been keeping tabs on everyone since he left, so he knew Ilsa had flown back to London a day later than planned, but Chance was still in San Francisco. He’d have to wait until he spoke to Chance to find out what exactly had happened between him and Ilsa. Guerrero knew he was pinning a lot on Chance’s non-verbal response to the kiss and the fact that he’d said that he found the kiss distracting, but at the moment it was all he had. The more Guerrero stopped trying to fight the idea that he was attracted to Chance, the easier it was to deal with those feelings. He hoped Chance felt the same way about him, but he wouldn’t really know until they both started being honest with each other about that kiss. He just had to trust that if Chance didn’t feel the same way, they’d find a way past it and still be friends.


“Are you sure you don’t want me to skip it?” Winston asked, for what had to be at least the tenth time. “The guys can manage without me tonight if you want me to stick around.

“Winston, it’s fine,” Chance insisted. “I don’t know why you think I can’t be left alone. Ilsa’s gone home to London, and yeah I miss her, but you’re not going to come in and find me swinging from the light fixtures!”

“It’s only a few old buddies from the force getting together to drink a lot of beer and bowl a few frames. It’s not even a league night! I doubt they’d even miss me..”

“Winston…”

“In fact, why don’t you come along with me, instead of sulking in the dark on your own like freakin’ Batman!”

“Winston, as much as I appreciate the offer, I try to avoid hanging out with law enforcement in my free time. I kind of prefer to stay off their radar. And I told you already, I wasn’t sulking in the dark, I fell asleep on the sofa and it got dark all on its own! Ames has finally quit bugging me with the phone numbers of every single woman she’s ever met, although I suspect she’ll be back with a whole fresh batch on Monday morning. I just want to spend the evening playing Xbox and watching badly dubbed kung-fu movies.”

“But…”

“And I won’t be on my own anyway. I’ve got Carmine to keep me company. I might even take him out for a walk later.”

Winston looked doubtfully at Carmine, who returned his gaze with a droopy-eyed look as he flopped to the floor at Chance’s feet.

“The only way that mutt is going for a walk is if you carry him,” Winston muttered.

“Just go and hang out with your buddies,” Chance sighed with exasperation. “I’ll be fine.”

Winston still looked far from happy about leaving Chance with only Carmine to keep him company but he could see that he wasn’t going to change his mind. With a final reminder to make sure he remembered to eat something, and Chance’s assurance that he would, Winston finally left.

“It would have been a whole lot easier to get rid of him if you’d just have let on that you’re back, Guerrero,” Chance called up the stairs. “What’s with all the sneaking about?”

“I just didn’t feel like explaining to Winston why I’ve been ducking his calls,” Guerrero replied, stepping out from the shadows.

“If it’s really taken you this long to relocate Carla and the kid, you’re seriously losing your touch, Guerrero,” Chance said as he climbed the stairs.

“I wasn’t exactly rushing, dude,” Guerrero replied. “I wanted the job done right, not fast. Plus, I kinda took the scenic route home.”

Chance thought he saw a look of mild amusement on his friend’s face, a if he was enjoying a private joke at his expense.

“So I guess now you have nothing more important to do, you decided to have a good sneak around my loft.” Chance cringed at how petulant it sounded.

Guerrero laughed and wandered into Chance’s lounge, where there was a stack of Bruce Lee DVDs waiting by the TV.

“Seriously dude?” Guerrero said as Chance followed him into the lounge. “You really think you’ve got anything hidden around here that I don’t already know about?”

“No,” Chance sighed. “I guess not.”

There was a awkward pause while Guerrero started looking through the pile of kung-fu DVDs and Chance tried to figure out what to do next.

“You weren’t kidding about the movie marathon then,” Guerrero said. “Although I’m sure Bruce Lee isn’t in this one.” Chance blushed as Guerrero held up a blank DVD case. He knew Guerrero didn’t even have to open the box to know it was porn, but he hoped that he hadn’t had the opportunity to check out its contents whilst he had been getting rid of Winston. It was one thing for Guerrero to know about his porn stash, but it was painfully awkward, given the current circumstances between them, for him to know that he had been planning to watch gay porn.

“Cut the crap, Guerrero. Are we going to talk about what happened before you left or not?”

Guerrero sighed. “No, we’re not going to talk about it.”

Chance walked over and took the blank case from Guerrero’s hands, dropping it back on to the pile with the rest.

“Don’t you think we should?” Chance asked. They were standing so close together now that Chance could smell Guerrero’s familiar scent, and he could feel the subtle disturbance in the air caused by his breathing. It was distracting, and Chance was finding it difficult to concentrate on anything but Guerrero’s lips.

Guerrero looked at Chance for a moment, then, without warning he slipped a hand behind Chance’s head and pulled him in towards him and kissed him. This time Chance only froze for a split second before he started kissing back, and when he ran his tongue along Guerrero’s lips, his friend moaned as they deepened the kiss into a hungry chaos of lips and tongue that left them both struggling for breath.

When they finally came up for air, Chance could see the silent questions in Guerrero’s eyes.

- Are you okay with this? Are we cool?

Chance grinned at him and wrapped his arms around Guerrero’s waist and pulled him in close, trying to put his answer to those unasked questions into a kiss that would let him know how much he wanted this. Guerrero upped the ante by grinding himself against Chance, and Chance responded by sliding his hands down to cup Guerrero’s ass and crushing their bodies in such a way that neither man could ignore just how aroused they both were. Guerrero moaned into the kiss at the sensation of feeling Chance’s hardness pressed against his body, and Chance began to push him, making him move back one step at a time, herding him towards the bedroom. As soon as Guerrero caught on to what Chance was doing, he unbuttoned his shirt and Chance peeled it off along with his undershirt, letting them drop to the floor as his hands began to explore Guerrero’s bare chest.

Just the simple touch of Chance’s hands moving against his skin was more intense than anything he had anticipated, and Guerrero began clawing at Chance’s t-shirt in a way that made it clear to Chance that if the offending garment was not removed immediately, Guerrero was likely to rip it from his body by force. Chance reluctantly broke off the kiss long enough to pull his t-shirt over his head, and Guerrero took advantage of the moment when Chance still had both arms raised to lean in and take one of his exposed nipples into his mouth and lightly graze it with his teeth. Distracted by Guerrero’s mouth on one nipple and his fingers pinching and pulling at the other, Chance moaned as he struggled to pull himself free from the t-shirt. When he finally mustered up the necessary co-ordination, he threw the t-shirt to the floor and shoved Guerrero backwards on to the bed. Guerrero grinned at the sight of Chance standing over him, bare-chested, flustered and with a hard-on straining the fabric of his jeans.

Chance removed Guerrero’s boots and toed off his own sneakers before joining him on the bed. He lay down beside Guerrero and pulled him close for another kiss, and Guerrero responded by kissing him back with a fierce intensity that made Chance’s mind spin and his body ache. Guerrero ran his hand down Chance’s back, over the curse of his ass and down to the back of his thigh before dragging Chance’s leg across his own, until they were in a position that allowed them to rub against each other through the fabric of their jeans. Chance began kissing along Guerrero’s jaw, but when Guerrero suddenly shifted against him in a particular way, he moaned and bit down hard on Guerrero’s neck, making him gasp and drag his nails against Chance’s back. Chance moaned into Guerrero’s neck and kissed the area where a bruise was already starting to form, as his hands began working Guerrero’s belt open.

Chance had unbuttoned Guerrero’s jeans and was sliding his hand inside when Guerrero suddenly moaned the word ‘stop‘. Chance gave a disappointed little grunt and stopped kissing his neck, although he left his hand exactly where it was, with his palm pressed against Guerrero’s cock.

“I need to tell you something,” Guerrero murmured in a hoarse, breathless voice.

“Now?” Chance asked in disbelief. “Now you want to talk?”

“Not really,” Guerrero smiled, “but I need you to know this isn’t about getting off.”

“Really?” Chance smiled gently, grinding his palm against Guerrero’s cock, making him groan softly.

“Okay, it’s not just about getting off,” Guerrero conceded. “I want you, Chance. But I want every part of you. No holding back. I need… It‘s all or nothing, dude.”

It suddenly hit Chance just what Guerrero was asking and just what it had cost him to admit that he needed more from Chance than just sex. Guerrero had never admitted that he ever needed anyone before, and yet he was lying half-naked in Chance’s bed asking for more than Chance had ever given anyone. What surprised Chance was that he didn’t have a single doubt in his mind about giving Guerrero what he needed, what they both wanted.

Chance leaned in and kissed Guerrero gently before staring into Guerrero’s eyes.

“Guerrero, I couldn’t give you less than everything if I tried.”

Chance barely had time to register the smile on Guerrero’s face before he was pulled into another hot, demanding kiss.

They made short work of removing the rest of their clothes, and Guerrero tossed his glasses on to the nightstand. Soon they were naked and entwined on the bed, grinding against each other and touching and tasting every part of each other they could reach. Guerrero rolled Chance on to his back and pinned his hips to the bed with his hands as he left a trail of licks and bites across his abdomen that made Chance gasp and twitch. When Guerrero licked up the length of Chance’s erection, Chance moaned and buried his hands in Guerrero’s hair. Guerrero let out a low chuckle at Chance’s appreciative response and began teasing little licks at the swollen head of Chance’s cock, smiling at the way Chance tried to thrust towards him. Chance let out a little whimper when the pressure from Guerrero’s hands on his hips prevented him from doing so and Guerrero groaned when he heard that noise again, the noise that had haunted his dreams and fantasies since the first time he had kissed Chance. He swiped his tongue across the very tip of Chance’s cock, lapping up the sticky, salty mess of pre-cum, before taking in as much of his length as he could.

Guerrero strained to hear every single gasp, moan and half-formed word that fell from Chance’s mouth as he sucked and licked at him, learning what technique provoked the loudest response or made Chance try to arch of the bed beneath him. He had known he would find the noises Chance made a turn-on, but he was totally unprepared for how good Chance would taste, and how the feeling of his cock sliding into his mouth would make his own dick ache in sympathy.

Guerrero was only dimly aware that Chance had been calling out his name, so it came as a shock when he suddenly leaned down and pushed him away.

“Guerrero, stop!” Chance panted. “I’m gonna come right now if you don’t fucking slow down!”

Guerrero smiled when he realised that Chance wasn’t just telling him to stop as payback for him making him hit the breaks earlier. Guerrero shifted his position until he was straddling Chance’s legs, and when he leaned forward and kissed him his cock brushed lightly against Chance’s, causing him to make that noise again.

“Fuck! You really don’t know the meaning of the words ‘slow down’ do you?” Chance muttered as Guerrero guided his hand towards his cock.

“And this is news how exactly?” Guerrero moaned as Chance’s hand began to work back and forth in an achingly slow rhythm. When Guerrero started to thrust into Chance’s hand in an attempt to control and speed up the rhythm, Chance moved his hand away and rolled them over so Guerrero lay beneath him scowling and frustrated.

“I’ve waited too long for this to rush it, Guerrero,” Chance smiled. “So you might as well get used to the idea that I’m going to take my time.”

“Well, if you put it like that…” Guerrero murmured as Chance began biting and licking at his neck is a way that made it difficult to catch his breath. He knew Chance was right. This was far too important to both of them.

Chance ran his hands slowly over Guerrero’s chest as he kissed along the angular ridges of his collar bone. Every so often he would carefully trace the slightly silver line of an old scar on Guerrero’s chest with his fingertips, and there was an intimacy in that touch that came from the knowledge that Chance remembered every single injury that Guerrero had sustained over the years they’d worked together. Guerrero had felt lust and passion plenty of times before, but nothing he’d experienced before compared to the tenderness and intimacy he felt at Chance’s hands simply touching him. It was unexpected and terrifying, but Guerrero felt as if his sanity and his life depended on the way Chance was touching him. He felt that if Chance stopped, he would simply cease to exist.

Chance shifted his hands down to grip Guerrero’s hips, and began to lick along the scars on Guerrero’s chest. Guerrero’s mind was still reeling from the touch of Chance’s fingers on his damaged, discoloured skin, but Chance’s tongue seemed to tear him wide open, leaving him more vulnerable and exposed than he ever thought possible. He realised that, despite the fear and the vulnerability, he was okay with it, because it was Chance that was stripping away his defences and exposing that part of himself that he kept locked away. There was nothing he could hide from Chance. There was nothing about himself that Chance didn’t already know and accept.

When Chance’s lips brushed against his cock, Guerrero took a deep shuddering breath, and Chance knew that, as badly as he wanted to take Guerrero’s cock in his mouth, he would have to wait. Guerrero was too damn close already. Instead he grazed his teeth along Guerrero’s hip whilst running his hands along the outside of his thighs, as he waited for Guerrero to come back from the brink. Just as Guerrero’s breathing settled into a more controlled rhythm, Chance felt him press something into his hand. It was a small bottle of lube, and Chance had been so caught up with memorising the long, lean, lines of Guerrero’s thighs that he didn’t even see where the bottle had come from.

Chance looked up at Guerrero and saw the look of raw need on his face. When he’d realised what Guerrero had put in his hand, he’d been about to ask him if he was sure this was what he wanted, but when he saw the look in Guerrero’s eyes, he saw everything he needed to know. Chance flipped the lid open and poured the lube on to his fingers, making sure they had a generous coating. With one hand he worked Guerrero’s cock with the same slow, measured stroke that had frustrated him earlier, and with the fingers slick with lube, he gently ran his fingertips over the puckered ring of muscle of Guerrero’s ass. He applied just a little pressure and with a small moan from Guerrero, Chance’s finger slid inside him. It didn’t take long for Chance to find that sweet spot inside him that had Guerrero moaning and clawing at the sheets.

“Are you okay?” Chance asked, fascinated by the way Guerrero reacted to even the slightest movement of his finger.

“Fuck!” Guerrero gasped. “Just keep doing what you’re doing now!”

Chance smiled and did as he asked, until he felt that Guerrero was relaxed enough to add another finger. As he worked it carefully inside him, Guerrero let out a deep, guttural moan.

“Shit! Am I hurting you?” Chance asked, worried that he was causing Guerrero pain.

“Yeah, but it’s a good hurt,” Guerrero said. “Chance, don’t you dare fucking stop!”

Chance forced himself to take it even slower, stretching Guerrero carefully and adding more lube every time he saw anything remotely like pain on his lover’s face. He took it so slowly that Guerrero had to beg him to add a third finger, which to Chance’s surprise, his body accommodated easily.

Chance looked down at Guerrero lying beneath him, looking like he was falling apart at Chance’s touch and loving every second of it. He had never seen Guerrero so unguarded and his chest tightened at the thought that he was the one responsible for bringing him to this point.

“I swear to God, Chance, if you don’t hurry up and fuck me, I will not be held accountable for my actions!”

Chance grinned as Guerrero’s words shocked him out of his revelry. He carefully withdrew his fingers and reached for the pack of condoms he kept in the nightstand. Guerrero moaned and grabbed the condom from Chance’s fingers that were still too slick with lube to be able to deal with the foil. He ripped it open with his teeth and carefully rolled the condom on to Chance’s cock, before slathering it with lube.

They seemed to simultaneously decide that it had been far too long since they had last tasted each other and their lips collided in a deep kiss before Chance firmly pushed Guerrero back on to the bed. He took a pillow and wedged it beneath Guerrero’s hips and carefully aligned his body against Guerrero‘s. Guerrero reached down and guided Chance’s cock to his ass as Chance gradually pushed slowly into him.

When Chance’s full length was finally buried inside him, Guerrero wrapped his legs around his waist and Chance rested his forehead against Guerrero’s. They lay there for a minute or two, lost in each other until Guerrero finally broke the silence.

“Chance…” he moaned.

“Fuck, I know,” Chance murmured. “Just give your body time to adjust.”

“No, that’s not what I… Why has it taken us so fucking long?”

“I don’t know,” Chance sighed.

Guerrero shifted slightly beneath him and the small movement sent shock waves through Chance’s body.

“Chance..” There was a pleading edge to Guerrero’s voice.

Chance slowly pulled away and Guerrero immediately groaned and dug his fingers into Chance’s biceps. As he slowly thrust back in they both moaned and Chance tried to focus on Guerrero’s fingers digging into his arms instead of the slick, hot, tightness of Guerrero’s ass. Chance knew he wasn’t going to last long so he made every thrust count, hitting Guerrero’s sweet spot almost every time.

“Guerrero,” Chance moaned, “I don’t know how long I can…”

“No holding back, babe,” Guerrero growled. “All or nothing, remember?”

At Guerrero’s words Chance stopped struggling to prolong his climax by keeping his thrusts slow and measured. He slammed into him harder and faster, and Guerrero moaned and began jerking off to Chance’s frantic new rhythm. Chance managed to shift his weight to one side and closed one hand over Guerrero’s so they were working their hands together.

“Come for me Guerrero...” Chance said softly, and moments later he did.

Chance managed to hold on for a few more thrusts as Guerrero writhed beneath him, riding out the very end of his orgasm, before his own climax tore through his body like a hurricane, leaving him blissed-out and boneless. He carefully withdrew and rested his head against Guerrero’s rapidly rising and falling chest, and collapsed on to the bed beside him as his strength left his body.

Guerrero ran his hand over Chance’s hair, and scratched at the short hair at the back of Chance’s head affectionately. Chance hummed his appreciation as he listened to Guerrero’s heartbeat slow back to a more normal rhythm.

“Guerrero?”

“Hmm?”

“Did you really just call me babe?”

Guerrero cringed as he remembered that he had. “Sorry, it just kind of… slipped out. It was a heat of the moment thing.

Chance laughed and propped himself up on his elbows so he could fully appreciate Guerrero’s embarrassment.

“Why ‘babe’?”

Guerrero was suddenly aware that there was a small pool of his own cum rapidly drying on his stomach and decided he’d better find something to clean it up with. He tried to sit up but Chance pulled him back on to the bed, determined to get an answer.

“Why ‘babe’?” Chance repeated.

“I don’t know,” Guerrero sighed, resigning himself to the fact that Chance was probably never going to let him forget it. “It just seemed a little inappropriate to call you ‘dude’ when you were… doing what you were doing at that particular moment!”

“Babe,” Chance said grinning at him. “I guess I could get used to that. But only in private though.”

“I’m not exactly into public displays of affection, in case you hadn’t noticed.”

Chance frowned. “No, I think the more private we keep this, the better.”

They lay in silence for a moment, imagining how the rest of the team would react to the idea of them being more than friends and colleagues. In theory they would be supportive, but in practice it would make things awkward and put everyone under unnecessary strain.

“What is this?” Guerrero asked eventually, uncertainty clouding his expression.

“This is what I’ve wanted for a very long time, Guerrero, and it is most definitely about more than getting each other off.”

Chance felt relieved as he watched the tension drain out of Guerrero’s expression, and he pulled Chance towards him and gave him a slow deliberate kiss.

“Well, then this is something I plan on getting used to, babe,” Guerrero said. He wasn’t sure about using the pet name for Chance. It seemed kind of ridiculous considering their shared history, but when Chance beamed at him with one of his little boy smiles, Guerrero decided that, oddly, it quite suited the former assassin. If calling Chance ‘babe’ made him light up like that, perhaps that was something else he could get used to.