Tiskets, Taskets and Tristans
4
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“But
it’s Tristan, Lex Luthor’s son Tristan?
The original Hellboy and not that horny thing with the really bad
sunburn?!”
“Yup”
Rory’s muffled voice broke through from inside her room.
“Okay…
what am I missing?” Lorelai asked the door.
Rory’s
head appeared in the doorway,
“He
paid four hundred dollars.”
“For
a lunch he forfeited by leaving!”
“Four
hundred dollars” Rory pressed.
“But
it’s Tristan, make-your-life-a-living-hell Tristan!
did he get out? Did he do a Steve
McQueen in The Great Escape? Oh! Did you
check his pants for dirt?!”
“It’s
military school mom,” Rory had disappeared back into her room, “not jail”
“Why
do I still feel like I am missing a piece of the puzzle?”
“Mom,
I’d say a couple of pieces short.”
Rory called out from her room.
“Tristan…you
sure?”
“Four
hundred dollars!” Rory voice came loudly.
“Okay
Heidi!” Lorelai gave up.
“Heidi?”
Rory’s head popped out the door again.
“Fleiss”
her mom explained.
“Eww!
“It’s
television, for women…” Lorelai said seriously mocking the commercial.
“I’m
calling the Cable Company tomorrow” Rory said coming out of her room.
“
sexy young lady before her.
“He
said to wear black” Rory looked down at herself innocently.
“That’s
not black, that’s come hither black!”
“You’re
crazy!” Rory turned to go pour herself some coffee.
“Why
don’t I see panty lines?” Lorelai pointed.
“Wha?!”
Rory choked on her coffee.
“I
don’t see panty lines,” Lorelai furrowed her eyebrows, “what kind of underwear
are you wearing to go out with boy mommy-no-like?”
“I’m
not having this conversation with you! Stop staring at my butt!”
“Cause
everybody knows you only break out the good stuff if you expect the other
person to… Are you wearing underwear?”
“Oh
my God!”
“Lift
up your dress!”
“I’m
leaving!” Rory turned away from her crazy mother and went for her coat.
“Isn’t
he picking you up?” Lorelai downshifted to mother mode.
“Yes,
but I’m not risking having him run into the psychotic lunatic that has taken
over the body of my mother! I’m waiting
outside!” Rory opened the door widely to catch an unsuspecting Tristan
mid-knock. Suppressing the surprise in
record time, Tristan smiled his most genuine,
“Mary…”
“Well
there’s that refreshing pet name!” Lorelai appeared at the door, “How could I
have forgotten!”
“Mrs.
Gilmore” Tristan acknowledged with a slight nod.
“You
get three kid,” Lorelai stepped back to let Tristan in, “and unless you’re
introducing my mother who you’ve brought with you, you’ve just used up two”
“Excuse
me?”
“Ahem…”
Rory frowned at her mother from behind Tristan as she draped her coat over her
arm.
“Right…”
Lorelai snapped out of it, “God the two of you look great together… so dressed
up… you both look ready for the opera.”
“Where
are we going?” Rory asked raising an eyebrow.
“The
opera” Tristan answered matter-of-factly.
“Huh?”
Lorelai’s brain pinged.
“Really?”
Rory eyed Tristan suspiciously… where was
the catch?
“The
Connecticut Opera House in
is currently playing Rigoletto” Tristan offered the two women eyeing him.
“As
in old Italian grampa with the funky smell?” Lorelai tried.
“No,”
Rory corrected, “as in the story of a young Duke who uses his power, money and
influence to seduce women ruining their lives…”
“How
morbidly appropriate…” Lorelai breathed out to herself turning away from the
kids.
Rory
noticed the frown on Tristan’s face, “We should go”
Tristan
nodded, “Mrs...” he began but caught Lorelai’s death glare and decided not to
finish that sentence, “Ummm…”
“Just
call me Lorelai” the woman offered.
“Right…
“Ditto
kid, like having a mole removed… have fun you two.” Lorelai closed the door
before walking to see them off from the window, “God…
look good together…”