Heaven's a lie

A/N: Honeymoon Suite Lyrics-from Lacuna Coil used...

Sagga.. Thank you. I'm hoping I can keep this up. So far this is not coming out the way it was in my head... Well, hope you all enjoy!

R/R: Should I continue??

PREVIOUSLY:

I locked up my heart and threw away the key.

Who needs a heart. Who needs a love.

Not me.

A sudden swish of my bedroom door has me jumping up.

I turn and refuse to allow my heart to break free. It’s done. No more.

“Tom?” he says.Your voice isa bare whisper. Concern evident in the tone.

“Commander.”

I don’t need him.

I don’t want him.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Commander."

My anger and hurt can not help escapingas your title comes outof my mouth.

I can see a slight change in your facial expression.

Youshow an expression of... hurt?..

Good! Now you can feel exactly what I have felt all this time.

"Tom.. Are you alright?" You have the nerve to ask me.

I can't do anything else but laugh at you.

If I didn’t actually know better, I would seriously believe you were concerned.

Please...Any concern would be for you, not me

Youcould say,Dear Chakotay:I was in the dark, but now I see the light.:

I can see youstarting to walk over toward the bed. .

“STOP RIGHT THERE!” I take a deep breathe. I will not lethim to see me weak.

I am strong. You will NOT bring me down.

Ever again.

“Leave.. Commander. I want you to leave.” I slid off the comfort of the bed to stand a few feet from you.

Get out of my life


I will stand tall.

I will stand proud.

You will not make me fall.

Showing weakness is not be allowed.

You don't listen. You just continue to narrow the gap between us, and my hand against your chest stops you from proceeding any further

"I thought I told you to leave!" My voice starts to break.

I will not give in.

I can’t. Get a grip Tom!

You're to blame
I'm no more you business

"Tom.. Can we talk?"

I roll my eyes at your audacity. I don't want to hear anything you have to say. I just want you to leave me alone. Let me be.

"First and foremost:I am Lt. Paris, to you. Secondly, do I have to call security and have you escorted out of my room. I'm sure I asked you to vacate on several occasions. You are taking your rank a little to far."

He stands there and listens bit does not act to leave.

"Listen to me first, then if you still wish, I will go. ThatI promise you, Tom.. Lt. Paris." You tell me.

Shut your mouth
I don't need your affection, darling
does it hurt?


I refuse you listen to the lies that come from your mouth.

I refuse to let you hurt me any longer.

A sudden thought floats into my head.

Now it’s my turn to fuck with you, Commander.

I make sure that were are meeting eye to eye.

I place my right palm upon your left cheek.

You take your hand and pull it to your lips, leaving a light kiss in

I’m left in shock for a few moments, but I must do this.

I must be free.

You don’t love me. You can't love me.

This relationship isn’t healthy.

Now I finally see.

Just go. Let me be.

Tilting my head down, I move my mouth toward yours.

Just as our lips are to meet, I turn my head and let out a loud chuckle.

I pull away from you.

“What ever we had is gone. What ever might of been.. Well... Your loss.”

This is your fault.

Your to blame.

Now leave me alone.

Stay away from me.

I look at the hurt look on your face. For a mere second I want to throw myself in your arms and tell you I’m sorry. But, that would defeat the purpose. I’m no whore. Not yours.. Not anyone’s. .

“Why?” you ask me. You look like this actually might of hurt you somehow.

I can’t stop myself as another bitter laugh comes from deep in my throat.

“Oh, poor baby. Gotta find himself a new whore to break in. Oh, well have fun. Heard Seven’s all up for it.”

“Tom...” you start to say, but I cut you off.

“Shut your mouth. I don’t need to hear another word from you. Now, you will leave, or I will have Tuvok escort you out.” I can’t stop the anger from voicing out.

Istare you down with hopefully cold blue eyes. I pray my eyes are not my betrayaler. I can not back down. I have to let him see that I am serious. What ever we had, or possibility could have.. Is no more.

You played this little game, and lost.

Too bad you don’t feel the pain in you heart, like I do.

You continue to stare at me. I don’t really understand why.

So I hit my com badge.

Then you turn and leave.

Falling backwards on my bed, I start laughing.

Then the tears fall.

Close your eyes
don't you feel the rejection, baby?
Does it hurt?
Come here now
I've got something to tell you, honey...
I don't want you back


Won't you take me back
won't you take me back with you
won't you take me back
won't you wrap me with your love again...?