Dangerous Infatuation

Chapter 16: Live my Life

~Goodbye to all my yesterdays
Goodbye, so long, I’m on my way
I had enough of crying, bleeding, sweating, dying
Hear me when I say, gonna live my life
Everyday~

Jesse opened his eyes. This time, it wasn’t too difficult. Still, the lights hurt his eyes so he closed them tight again. He felt groggy, his body seemed to be asleep. He would liked to have turned onto his side but couldn’t control his muscles. The only thing he was able to do was turn his head to the side, pressing his heated face against the cool surface of the bed. He heard a small rustling sound just before a warm hand caressed his cheek.
"Jesse, can you hear me?"
Even in his dazed state, he was able to recognise Adam's voice. He sounded worried. His vocal chords wouldn't cooperate with him, so he pressed his face into the palm of his hand instead in answer. Adam took his hand, putting light pressure on the one in his face in order to gain his attention.
"Jesse, if you can hear me squeeze my hand!"
Adam waited anxiously for a response. Nothing happened and when he’d almost given up hope, Jesse’s fingers closed weakly around his hand. His eyes slowly opened up again. This time, he kept them open even when they started to water from the light blinding him.
"Hey, look who’s awake. Don’t move! You have all the time in the world!"
Jesse tried to speak again. He had to clear his throat before he was able to whisper one single word.
"..Shalimar?"
Adam nodded, l hol holding his head between his hands.
"I will call her, alright? You sleep until she comes!"
Jesse’s eyes fell closed and he simply obeyed.
~~~~~~~
Three days had passed. Three days filled with worries, tears, and almost no sleep for everybody. Finally, Adam had put his foot down and sent Brennan, Emma, and Shalimar to their rooms. He wanted them to get at least eight hours of sleep before allowing them back into the lab. Jesse’s critical state had finally stabilized when Adam sent them away. Barely 4 hours had passed when Jesse chose to wake up. For a moment Adam thought about letting Shal sleep a little longer. But he figured hearing the good news would more than make up for the loss sleep. He checked Jesse’s vital-signs on the monitor and the transfusion bag once again before he left the lab, quickly heading for Shalimar’s room. He wanted to tell her face to face. Carefully, he opened the door slipping quietly into her room. She was fast asleep and for a moment he hesitated. But then he remembered the desperation in Jesse’s voice when he’d asked for her, so he sat down beside her on the bed. His hand moved one of her long locks away from her face before gently touching her head and stroking it.
"Shalimar."
His voice was a soft whisper. She pressed into the touch a bit but otherwise stayed asleep.
"Shalimar, wake up!"
He said a little louder this time, grapping her shoulder in one hand and shaking her slightly. Tired eyes popped open at once, looking at Adam with huge eyes and a startled expression on her face. He saw the fear in her eyes and smiled reassuringly. Her mouth opened but Adam cut her off before she could say a word.
"Jesse woke up!"
Her small sigh of relief reached his ears. Tears streamed from her eyes as she closed them. Adam wiped the silver drops running down her cheeks away with his thumb.
"He asked for you!"
A sobbing laugh escaped the Mutant’s chest and she couldn’t keep from throwing herself into Adam’s arms. He held Shal tight against his chest until her body stopped trembling and the sobs subsided. He pressed a sweet kiss on her hair before pulling back.
"Come on, let’s go to the lab."
He took her hand in his and they left her room together.

Tbc




Chapter 17: Hope

~When you cried, I’d wipe away all of your tears
You screamed, I’d fight away all of your fea


The door to the lab opened slowly and Brennan walked in. He still hurt but it got better after Adam gave him a special treatment. The rest of the poison would have to fade away on its own.
The Elemental stopped in front of the bed Jesse was lying on. He quietly looked down at his friend and carefully wiped a single drop of sweat away from his cheek.
The tender caress was enough to awaken the sick Mutant. His eyes opened and he looked drowsily up at his partner.
Brennan took a step back, shocked by the fact that Jesse had actually woken up. A little gasp escaped him, calling Adam’s attention to their side.
“Hey, sleep well?”
Jesse nodded slowly. A tiny smile crept over his face when he saw Brennan’s face. It came out as more of a grimace, but they knew what he meant. Brennan’s voice was a little shaky when he finally spoke.
“When did he wake up? Will he be ok?”
Jesse answered him instead of Adam. His voice was raw and you could hear the strain in it but he continued on anyway.
“I am fine!”
Tired, he closed his eyes, hearing a chuckle come from both men. He smiled again and this time, you could see it clearly.
“I am not ready do die yet!”
He felt Adam’s warm hand on his forehead, pressing down lightly.
“That’s good news. And I won’t let, Je, Jesse, I won’t let you!”
The two men exchanged a look, relief washing over their faces. Jesse’s next question distracted them from their darker thoughts and they turned their attention back to him.
“Where’s Shalimar?”
He still sounded hoarse but there was something else in his voice. Anxiety? He must have noticed that she wasn’t in the lab with them even in his current condition.
“You said you went to get her?”
Adam nodded.
“Give her a little more time. She was overwhelmed by her emotions when I told her you’d woken up.”
His blue-grey eyes narrowed a bit before he closed them again. Why would she need time to come and see him? He loved her, didn’t she know that?
“I’ll go and check on her. If I have to I’ll drag her over here, ok?”
Now that sounded like the old Brennan. The way he sounded before everything happened, before they went through all this shit!
Jesse was thankful for his tone. Thankful for things going back to normal even if itld tld take some time for him to recover.
And he would recover. He had to! He wanted to tell Shalimar so many things he hadn’t dared to yet. Mostly, he wanted to tell her that he loved her. He loved her so much it hurt. It hurt more than his wounds or the poison still running through his veins. It was his motivation to go on, to endure the weakness and the pain.
And he would remember the pain they had to go through to find each other even when they were old and grey.
What he didn’t know was that the pain wasn’t over yet.
It had not even really started….

Tbc.




Note: What can I say? Just read it…


Chapter18: Shattered Dreams


She was scared. Scared to death by her thoughts.
She didn’t know if she was right and all she had to do was go over to the lab and talk to him.
But it was the first time in Shalimar’s life that she didn’t have the guts to do the right thing. Such an easy thing.
She still sat on her bed, holdeolded hands shaking slightly in her lap. Her stomach was a tight knot and she felt like she was going to be sick. Tears ran silently down her cheeks, leaving silver trails on her face, the only sign of the emotions she was going through in the moment. A deep sobbing sigh escaped her chest.
She needed to decide what to do. She wiped a hand over her eyes, unconsciously straightening her at the same time. She could not stand the thought of being near him. Or going on with their lives as if nothing had happened between them. But had it really?
Was it just a figment of her imagination, a wish, or a dream?
Another deep intake of breath and she knew. She had made her decision and it would break her heart. It already had when the thought crossed her mind. But the Alternative was unthinkable…

~~~~~~

Brennan left the lab and was on his way to find Shalimar. She was probably in her room, hiding from everybody else.
He thought about the little talk he and Jesse had when they’d been in the bar before Ezra attacked him. Maybe she had the same feelings and those feelings were holding her back now. Maybe it was something else. But whatever it was, they could sort it out. Jesse would help her when he was physically in the state to tell her what he really felt.
Brennan walked past Emma’s room. The door was slightly open and he heard soft, crying noises. He stopped abruptly and pushed the door wide-open, stepping inside.
Emma sat with her knees up to her chest on the floor in front of her bed. Her blanket was draped around her shoulders, her face shielded between her arms and the soft cover from her bed. A few steps brought Brennan to her side, falling on his knees. Pain rushed through his veins for a moment but he pushed it aside. Emma was more important than his aching body.
He pulled the blanket carefully away from her, almost causing her to jump in fright. She hadn’t heard him through her gut wrenching sobs.
Warm palms wiped the tears from her eyes. The deep, brown stars that were Brennan eyes looked at her filled with concern.
“What happened?”
She leaned into him, his arms wrapping tightly around her as she did. Brennan whispered soothing words into her ears, saying everything that crossed his mind. She was captured deeply in her dream. She could hardly speak between her soft, little cries.
“I dreamt that Jesse died! It was so real. I know it was real. It was like one of my visions… I… oooh Jesse…!”
“No, no, don’t worry Darling! He is fine. He woke up. He’s fine…!”
Emma freed herself from his embrace. Huge, water filled eyes stared at Brennan in disbelief.
“You are lying!”
Her voice trembled badly. He shook his head.
“No, I swear. I wanted to find Shalimar. Jesse asked for her. He told me he is fine although he doesn’t look it, not really at least! If you don’t believe me, call Adam. He’s with him and he can tell you, too!”
More tears streamed from her eyes but he could tell from her expression that she cried from relief. He smiled and ran his hands over her wet cheeks again, wiping the tears away. Brennan placed a soft kiss on each of her eyelids before he pulled Emma close again for a moment, stroking her hair.
However bad the last days had been, it brought them closer together.
“Come on, let’s go and find Shalimar. Jesse’s waiting for her!”
~~~~~~~~~

The door to Shalimar’s room was closed. Brennan looked at Emma for a sec before he knocked on the wood. They got no answer.
“Shal, are you there? Can we come in?”
He knocked again and this time, the door swung open. Emma could see the surprised expression on Brennan’s face before he pushed the door open and walked in. She heard him gasp in shock and followed him quickly.
The room was a mess!
The closets stood wide open, most the drawers were pulled out and clothes lay scattered all over the room. One of her bags stood empty in the middle of the room as if it were considered to be too small for the purpose at hand.
Emma looked around and found a lot of Shalimar’s clothes and personal stuff gone. A bad feeling formed in her stomach and sent shivers all over her skin.
“Where is she?” As if Brennan would know!
He just shrugged his shoulders. He was just as confused as Emma was.
“Let’s see, if we can find her!”
The two Mutants stormed out of the room, systematically going through every room, searching for their friend. With every room they found empty, their worries grew.
When they reached the garage, they saw that one of the cars was gone.
Brennan sounded very concerned when he said: “We have to tell Adam!”


Tb


*The Alternative is unthinkable* is from the TV Show Highlander. Said by Methos, the 5000year old brat to Alexandra in ‘Timeless’ and I just love the phrase!

Chapter 19: Telling Adam

“Wait Emma!”
Brennan stopped her before she could open the door to the lab.
“I think it will be better to tell Adam first. Jesse is still in a bad state and this is too much to handle, more than he could at the moment, I am afraid.”
He looked at her face, stricken with the terror of the last few days. He didn’t feel like it but he gave her a warm smile to cheer her up a little.
“We will find her, don’t worry. How about you go to the kitchen and make us some coffee and I will get Adam? We will meet you there.”
Emma nodded and turned towards the kitchen, not before she looked one last time, worried, into Brennan’s eyes.
He sighed when she was gone and pushed the button to open the door.

***********

Adam stood beside Jesse checking something. Brennan could hear the soft laughter coming from their teacher and father figure. He came closer and saw that Jesse was awake. He must have said something that caused Adam to forget about his worries for a moment.
Piercing blue-grey eyes met his own. The shadow no longer held his hands over them and Jesse actually looked on the way to recovery. A smile appeared on his face when he saw Brennan.
He turned his attention to Adam before Jesse could ask for Shalimar.
“Is our Baby here feeling good enough so I can have a quick word with you?”
He grinned down at Jesse and winked an eye. Brennan saw the slight sign of anger and the deep intake of breath to answer his joking words and quickly spoke on.
“I need to show you something, Adam. It is important.”
Jesse answered instead to Brennan’s question.
“Yeah, just leave the Baby alone. If I didn’t feel so tired, I’d kick your ass all the way through the danger room!”
“I am sure you would. Give me a call if you need me, Jesse. I will be back in a minute.”
Adam straightened the blanket covering Jesse before he followed Brennan out of the lab into the kitchen. They didn’t say a word until they’d reached Emma. The smell of coffee filled the room and the young Mutant poured them both a cup of the hot drink.
Adam broke the silence.
“What did you want to show me? Had something happened? Again?”
Emma broke down into tears.
“Shalimar is gone.”
“What do you mean, gone?”
He walked around the table and put a soothing hand on Emma’s shoulder.
“Where is she?”
Brennan swallowed hard before he could answer.
“We don’t know, Adam. She packed some of her stuff and one of the cars is gone too. She took the yellow Beetle and must have driven off.”
“Have you tried to call her over the comm. Link?”
Emma forgot to cry for a moment and even Brennan looked quite surprised. And embarrassed.
“Well, no, we didn’t. I haven’t actually thought about that. I was quite shocked when we couldn’t find her.”
“Me neither.”
Emma’s voice was very quiet and sounded ashamed that they hadn’t thought about such an easy thing.
“I think we’ve been through a lot in the last days. Don’t worry about that.”
Adam activated his comm. Link calling out for Shalimar. He got no answer and tried again but even after a third and fourth time he failed. A small sigh escaped him and Emma started crying again.
“She must have taken her Ring off. We have to try again later.”
Adam faced Brennan. Deep shadows lay under his eyes and he looked very tired. Even his voice sounded exhausted and was full of worries.
“I want you two to check all the places she could be at. You have to inform Proxy Blue and call all of our sources. Maybe somebody saw her or knows where she could be.”
He knelt down in front of Emma, wipher her tears away with his hands.
“I need you to try and find her. You think you are strong enough at the moment?”
Emma stared at him with huge, water-filled eyes but she nodded. Adam smiled relieved. “Good. I have to check on Jesse. Let’s try to not tell him before we know something about Shal for sure, all right?”
He waited for them to agree before he stood up. Tired, he wiped one hand over his face. They’d come so far. They couldn’t fail now and loose a member of the team after all.


TBC

A/N: Some more, searching and waiting and hoping for a sign.

Chapter 20: Searching


Brennan sat in front of the computer and connected friends and foes and all the sources they had in the past or still worked with. Proxi Blue was informed about the missing Member of Adam’s crew, sending a hidden message in all directions. Genomex didn’t need to know about the latest happenings at the Sanctuary.
People who knew Shalimar were sent to places she might hide in. Brennan would go as soon as he was done with the work, to search on his own for his friend. He couldn’t just sit and wait for a message.

~~~~~

Emma went to her room, entering the bathroom; she turned on the water and let it run into a pool in her hands. The cold splashed in her face sent icy shivers down her spine. Scared eyes looked at her through the mirror and she needed some time to realise that they were her own. How on earth could all this have happened?
The pictured of Jesse’s lifeless body bathed in blood rushed once more into her mind, the spasm caused by the energy rushing through his unmoving form as Adam fought to keep him alive, but the memory was too much. Her stomach spilled over and Emma threw up in the sink. The wrenching sobs along with sick feeling deep down in her brought her down to her knees.

She felt the cold tiles on the floor pressed against her heated face as soft cries shook her entire body, as tears ran down her cheeks and spilled on to the floor. Her eyes were shut tightly while her mind wandered on in search of Shalimar.
‘Where are you, Shal? Why did you leave us? …Why did you leave Jesse?’
For a moment the picture of her Mutant friend and partner flashed into her mind. Emma saw her sitting in the seat of the car, knees high up to her chin, face bathed in silver tear-drops. Shal lifted her head quickly as if she’d look straight at Emma. Their eyes met for a split second before Emma felt herself being pushed back.
‘No Emma, leave me alone…’
Heat rushed through her veins, flowing like liquid fire to all of her senses. Her head spinning from the pain exploding in to it. She couldn’t hold back the scream which echoed through the house. She almost welcomed the darknesllinlling her in its arms a moment later.

~~~~

Jesse opened his eyes when he heard someone coming into the lab. It was Adam. Even Jesse’s tired mind recognised the tense look in his face.
Adam seemed to feel the attention he had drawn to himself and smiled half-hearted. He didn’t talk to the injured Mutant when he checked his vital signs.
Jesse’s eyes never left Adam. He waited patiently for an explanation but his mentor said nothing. Finally he couldn’t keep quiet anymore.
“What is it? Where…, where is Shalimar? You wanted to get her so I can see her.”
Adam did not answer. He just turned around and took something from the table. He filled an injection shot with a clear liquid before he faced the bed with Jesse on it.
He wiped a swab with alcohol over his right arm before he pierced the needle into his arm.
“You need to sleep now.”
His voice was low and shivered a little.
Warmth spread through Jesse’s body as he felt the injection take effect he also felt the fear that swept through his veins.
“What happened to Shalimar?”
His voice was barely a whisper.
Adam looked down into Jesse’s face who was almost asleep but still fought against the healing slumber with all his might.
“She’s fine. Everything’s ok!”
Full of dread as he bold face lied to the Mutant he loved like a son. Adam’s eyes filled slowly with tears.
As unwanted slumber reached Jesse, A painful scream filled his ears or was it just a dream? The moment before he lost his fight against his medicated slumber, he saw that Adam was crying.
Shalimar was the last thing on his mind before it went blank.

~~~~~

Brennan almost jumped out of his chair when he heard the terrible scream. He knew it was Emma and ran as fast as he could to her room. The door slammed open and it took him just a second to see that the room was deserted.
His heart sank when he entered the bathroom and saw Emma on thoor.oor. Her face white and her skin cold, Brennan reached for a pulse, relieved he found it and, that she was still breathing.
Brennan lifted her into his arms very carefully and carried her over to the bed. Adam came inside the moment he had laid her down.
“What happened?”
Brennan just shrugged his shoulders, he simply didn’t know.
“Emma. Emma, can you hear me?”
Adam slapped her cheeks a little and Emma woke up slowly. Her eyes fluttered open as she reached for her aching head. A small moan escaped her before she was aware of her surrounding and her friends leaning over her.
She took some deep breaths before she could speak.
“I tried to find Shalimar. I saw her but…”
Emma closed her eyes again as Adam placed a hand on her shoulder to get her attention.
“Yes?”
“She must have felt me because she pushed me away. It hurt. It hurt so badly.”
She rolled onto her side and hid her face in her arms, leaning slightly against the warmth of Brennan’s body, who sat beside her. He moved down next to here as he pulled her in his arms, looking at Adam.
“What can we do?”
“At the moment? Nothing. Just wait and hope for a sign. Or a wonder.”
And without another word he left the room.


Tbc