Infinity

TITLE: Infinity (34/36)

AUTHOR: Master F&M

FANDOM: Law and Order: SVU

RATING: Everything from PG to R—just like life.

SUMMARY: A Fin-based saga to follow his life that isn’t seen on the show.

DISCLAIMER: L&O: SVU and all its characters belong to Dick Wolf, NBC, and whomever

                          else puts the show out for our enjoyment. I just get to play with them.

AUTHOR’S NOTE: Sam is a character of my own creation. She does not exist on the show.

FEEDBACK: Please give some. For entertainment purposes only.

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CHAPTER 34 

            Sam entered the apartment carrying the bags she’d amassed during her shopping trip.
What had started out as a simple outing to pick up a few pieces of even larger yet maternity
clothes, had turned into a full out Wednesday night holiday shopping spree once Tori had gotten
involved. She didn’t really mind. Though the Munches were Jewish, John had never deprived
her of the festivities the other kids enjoyed, and she’d grown to love the hustle and bustle of the
season.

            Fin looked at his watch as she came in, then got up to help her with the bags. “It’s late. I
was starting to worry.”

            Sam looked contrite as she moved over to the sofa. “I’m sorry. Tori had all these places
she wanted to take me, and it was fun having someone to shop with.”

            “What did you do,” Fin looked at the number of bags she’d brought in with her, “buy out
every store?”

            Sam laughed. “No. I think I might have left a few things behind.”

            Fin came over and gave her belly its usual kiss. He sat down a little away from her and
lifted her legs onto his. Taking off her shoes, he began to massage her feet that he knew must be
hurting. She sighed appreciatively.

            “Have I told you today how wonderful you are?”

            Fin smiled a little and glanced at her. “No, but you can show me later.”

            Sam smiled back before her expression turned more serious. She wasn’t sure how to
broach the subject with him. She decided a head-on approach would be best.

            “I ran into your sisters at the hospital this morning.”

            Fin’s hands stopped moving. He looked at her, then back at her feet as he began
massaging them again. “You didn’t tell me that earlier.” She’d had a routine appointment with
Dr. Ross and had called Fin to assure him that everything was okay.

            “I know. I wanted to wait until I saw you to tell you about it.”

            Fin frowned, then moved the massage up to her ankles. “They give you any grief?”

            “Nothing I couldn’t handle.”

            He sighed and dropped his hands. “What did they say to you?”

            Sam lowered her legs to the floor and moved over. Lifting his arm, and placing it around
her shoulder, she nestled next to him and hugged him tightly.

            “Like I said, nothing I couldn’t handle.” She didn’t think he needed to hear about
Connie’s sarcastic comments on how thrilled she was that he was having another bastard child.

            “Your younger sister was pretty nice, though.” Geraldine had never actually seen Sam
before and only found out who she was after Connie pointed her out.

            “What did Gerrie have to say?”

            “I think Connie embarrassed her. She apologized for her and asked about you. She
wanted to know how you were.” She stopped, hoping that would draw Fin’s interest, but he
remained silent. She hugged him even tighter.

            “I invited her to dinner on Friday.” She counted several seconds before she felt him
breathing again.

            “Why? Why would you do that?”

            Sam sat up to face him. “Because she wanted to see you and seemed sincere about it, and
because I want our kids to know their family. Their entire family. Don’t you want that?”

            Fin was quiet for a moment. “She said she wanted to see me?”

            “Yes.” Sam nestled next to him again. “It’ll be okay. It’s the season for miracles,
remember? Have a little faith.”

.....................................................

            Capt. Donald Cragen joined Benson and Stabler on their way to the squad room. Back
from a meeting at One Police Plaza, he was glad to be indoors again. New York winters seemed
to get colder and colder to him. Either that or he was just getting old.

            The group entered their work area to find Fin with his head buried in his arms on his
desk, and Munch gleefully lunching on a chili dog. All three looked questioningly at Fin then at
Munch.

            “Is there a problem Detective?” Cragen directed his question to the member of his squad
whose face he could actually see.

            “Nope. No problem.” Munch sat back in his chair with a self-satisfied smile.

            “Then what’s with him?” Elliot nodded at Fin on the way to his desk.

            “Oh, don’t mind him. My partner just appears to be suffering from Couvade.” Fin sat up
and glared at Munch, but said nothing.

            Cragen looked from one to the other. “Cou- what?”

            “Couvade. A well documented but little known syndrome that affects men primarily in
our Western hemisphere. Its name is derived from the French word ‘couver’, meaning to hatch.
And unfortunately for my partner, a list of its psychosomatic symptoms includes insomnia,
indigestion, and the one he’s enjoying at the moment: nausea.”

            “Wait a minute,” Elliot looked just as gleeful as Munch. “Fin has morning sickness?”

            “Exactly,” Munch was happy to answer. “And an apparently bad case of the sympathetic
symptom, since he can’t even seem to open his mouth to defend himself.” Munch picked up the
remains of his lunch and waved it under Fin’s nose.

            “Want a bite?”

            Fin took a look at the congealing layer of grease and nearly gagged. He laid his head
back on his desk. Munch laughed happily, while Cragen couldn’t hold back a smile. Elliot
chuckled along with them. He shook his head at Fin.

            “That’s just beautiful.”

            To Fin’s dismay, Olivia came to his defense. “I don’t know . . . I think it’s kind of
sweet.” She came over to stand next to Fin with her arms folded across her chest.

            “I mean, how many men actually empathize enough with their pregnant partners to share
their symptoms? Did you, Elliot?”

            “Um, no. I can honestly say that I did not behave like my wife while she was carrying
any of our kids.” His comment brought on another round of laughter.

            “That’s our Fin, “ Cragen offered. “Mr. Sensitive.” He laid a hand on his shoulder.

            “Tell you what, Tutuola. Why don’t you take some vacation time for the rest of the day
and head on home? It’ll be a little difficult for me to explain away one of my male detectives
being pregnant.”

            The squad laughed again while Fin gathered his things to go. Munch leaned back in his
chair and folded his arms behind his head. He gave a contented sigh.

            “Ah, it’s good to be king.”

            Fin gave him a heated look. “I’m gonna hunt your bony ass down when this is over.”

..............................................

            Sam came out of the bathroom and reached for the ringing phone. As much as she was
enjoying being pregnant, feeling sick every morning- and sometimes afternoon and evening as
well- was starting to get on her nerves.

            “Hello?”

            “Hey, Princess. How are you feeling?”

            Sam decided not to bother with the truth. “I’m okay. What’s up?”

            “Oh, I just thought I’d warn you that Tutuola may not be in such a good mood when he
gets there.”

            “What do you mean? Is he on his way here now?” She narrowed her eyes into the phone.
“What did you do to him, Uncle Munch?”

            John laughed. “Now, why would you think I’m responsible? Cragen sent him home on
account of his disability. You know, his morning sickness.”

            Sam rolled her eyes. “Yes, and I’m sure you had nothing to do with that.” She blew out a
breath.

            “You know, I’m going to have to ask you to lay off the father of my children.”

            Munch was quiet for a moment. “Speaking of which . . . Fin told me there wasn’t going
to be any nuptials.”

            She was surprised. “He told you that?”

            “Well, told is a relative term. I sort of pried it out of him.”

            “I see.” She remained quiet.

            “I hope that decision has nothing to do with me.”

            “Meaning?”

            “Meaning my past mistakes shouldn’t keep you from being happy.”

            Munch had been guilt-ridden every since Fin had reluctantly told him that Sam had turned
down his proposal. He wouldn’t have said anything about it at all, but Munch had kept asking
him when Fin was going to make his niece an honest woman. Fin had finally told him that he’d
have to ask Sam that since she was the one who didn’t want to get married. Munch had
immediately known the reason why.

            Sam sighed. “Uncle Munch, I am happy. Just the way we are.”

            “And that has nothing to do with the number of times I’ve managed to dissolve my
matrimonial unions?”

            Sam acquiesced. “I think we’d both know I was lying if I said that hasn’t made me wary,
but honestly, I’m perfectly happy with the way things are now with Fin. I just don’t see why we
should change it.”

            Munch gave in. He knew he wouldn’t be able to change her mind. “Okay, kiddo. I just
want what’s best for you.”

            “I know. And I assure you, I already have that.”

.................................................

            Fin awoke with the sensation that something wasn’t right. Immediately worried, he
switched on a lamp to find Sam awake and sitting up.

            “Baby, what’s wrong?”

            She tried to smile at him. “Nothing. Go back to sleep.”

            “It’s obviously something.” He grew alarmed when she grimaced and clutched her
stomach.

            “Are you in pain?”

            “No, no.” She quickly reassured him. “Not exactly.”

            She rubbed both her hands over her belly and held her breath for a moment before
expelling it. “It’s just that it feels like these guys are having a wrestling match in here.”

            She closed her eyes and grimaced again as another round took place. Fin reached over,
putting a hand on her stomach. He smiled and placed his other hand there as well when he felt
the rolling movement.

            “Yeah. They are a little rambunctious, aren’t they?” he asked proudly.

            “Well, I’m glad one of us is happy. How would you like to have what feels like bowling
balls rolling around inside you?”

            Fin laughed a little. “Okay. I’ll see what I can do.” He scooted down on the bed until he
was eye level with her belly and gently rapped a knuckle against it. Sam watched him, amused.

            “Hey, you guys.” Fin addressed his babies. “Time to settle down. It’s late and your
mom needs her rest. She’s got a big day tomorrow with your aunt coming over.”

            He snuck a peek at her, then covered his mouth so she couldn’t ‘see’ what he was saying.
“And she gets real cranky if she doesn’t get enough sleep.”

            Sam started to protest but thought better of it. Fin cocked his head toward her belly as if
he was listening to something.

            “What? You want a story? Nah, I don’t know about that. I don’t really do stories.”

            Sam took a quick intake of breath at a particularly strong kick. Fin laughed at the timing.

            “Alright, alright. Calm down. Don’t break anything.” He scrunched up his face as he
thought.

            “Let me see . . . Let me see . . . A story . . . Okay, I got one. See, Once Upon a Time
there were these bears that lived in the woods: the moms, the pop, and their kid.” He paused as
he tried to remember more of the story.

            “Oh. And they liked to eat a lot of porridge.”

            “Huh?” He was listening again. “What’s porridge? I think it’s like oatmeal. What’s
oatmeal?” The storyteller was getting a little annoyed.

            “Don’t worry about it. You’ll find out soon enough, okay? Can I continue?” He took a
moment to find his place again.

            “Alright, so the bears made their porridge, then they went out. That’s when this girl
named Goldilocks came along and went into their house.” He paused for another question.

            “I don’t know why she did it. I wasn’t there. Look, you want me to tell you this story or
not?” Sam covered her mouth to keep from laughing out loud.

            “Anyway, it ends up that she cleans out their frig, breaks some of their stuff, then has the
nerve to take a nap. When the bears get back, they find her and call the cops. She gets arrested
and ends up doing three to five in the State Pen for breaking and entering, and destruction of
private property.” He ended his story with the moral.

            “So take a lesson from it: Don’t Do Drugs and Stay in School.” He kissed her stomach
twice, once for each child. “Now go to sleep.”

            Sam giggled as he joined her back at the head of the bed. “Do you have any idea of how
much I love you?”

            Fin pulled her into his arms and settled in. “You’re just saying that ‘cause I calmed the
kids down.”

            “Well, yes, that is true. You did. But I love you something awful anyway.”

            “Ah-huh. Just try to remember that when we’re in the delivery room.”

.................................................

            Sam finished up in the dining room as Fin nervously waited for his sister to arrive. He
still wasn’t sure of her intentions. Although it was Connie who was usually more vocal in her
disapproval of him, Gerrie had never strayed far from Connie’s opinions. He was worried that
her visit was only going to end up in some kind of squabble directed at Sam, and he couldn’t
allow that. No one was going to come into their home and upset his very pregnant wife.

            Fin caught himself at the use of the word. Well, that’s what she is. Maybe not legally,
but Sam was his wife in every other way. In every way that mattered.

            Fin couldn’t help but smile at her as she half walked, half waddled back into the kitchen.
Her stomach seemed to grow bigger every day. The babies weren’t due for another two months,
but at the rate she was growing, Fin didn’t think she’d be able to stand upright soon.

            He dropped his eyes down to her breasts when she leaned across the table to pick up a
glass of water. Despite all his kidding, he thought she was the most beautiful he’d ever seen her .
. . and the sexiest. Although he kept telling himself that it shouldn’t, the sight of her so very
rounded and full stirred something in him that kept his hormones operating at their maximum.
He might have even felt guilty about how often he felt the need to express that stirring, if she
didn’t seem to be enjoying it so much herself. Fin looked up and found her staring at him.

            “You okay?” She walked over to where he was leaning against the counter. “You look a
little nervous.”

            “I don’t know about this, Sam.” Fin began rubbing her belly. It was such an automatic
thing for him to do now, that sometimes he wasn’t even aware that he was doing it. “Why don’t
we just call the whole thing off?” He smiled at her.

            “I can think of a couple of other things I’d rather be doing tonight.”

            She smiled back. “As good as that sounds, it’s a little late to change plans. She should
be here any minute.” The doorbell sounded.

            “Just give her a chance.”

            Sam took Fin’s arm, leading him into the living room, then hung back and waited for him
to answer the door. He opened it and stood for a moment in silence. Sam frowned and started to
move, when he found his voice again.

            “Mom.”

            “Hello, Odafin.”

            Fin stepped back, allowing her and his sister to enter the apartment. Gerrie offered an
explanation.

            “When I told Mom I was coming over for dinner, she wanted to come, too.” She looked
at Sam.

            “We probably should have called first.”

            Sam stepped forward and stood next to Fin. “No, it’s fine.” She turned to Fin’s mother.

            “We’re happy to have you, Mrs. Tutuola.”

            “Please, call me Denise.” She extended the dish she’d brought with her.

            “I made your grandmother’s peach cobbler.” She spoke to Fin, but had the presence of
mind to hand the dessert over to Sam. Sam smiled at it.

            “Thank you. Fin’s told me it was his favorite.” She turned to him to respond, but Denise
spoke to him first.

            “I know we’ve had our differences in the past, but I think it’s time we put an end to all
that. I look at Dorian, and I can’t help but think of all the years we’ve missed with him. It finally
dawned on me, though, that his father’s been here all this time, yet we’ve been missing time with
him, too.” She stepped forward and touched his arm.

            “You’re my son. I don’t want to lose any more time with you,” she briefly touched Sam’s
elbow, “or with any more of my grandchildren.” She paused and took a breath.

            “I’d at least like to try to be a part of your life again.”

            Fin shook his head in confusion. “But nothing’s changed, Mama. I’m still not who you
wanted me to be, and I never will be.” 

            Denise squared her shoulders. “Well, I can’t speak for your father or for Connie, but
Gerrie and I are very proud of who you’ve become,” she paused before adding, “and we’re sorry
we were ever anything otherwise.”

            Fin looked from his mother to his sister, at lost for words. He turned to Sam, then settled
on the cobbler.

            “Did you put in extra nutmeg like Nanna used to?”

            “Of course.” Denise came forward and gave her son the hug she knew he was asking for.
“Just like you like it.”

            Fin hugged her back tightly. Sam exchanged smiles with Gerrie. She didn’t know if she
felt more like crying or jumping up and down with excitement.

            Fin broke the hug and turned to Sam again. He touched her belly.

            “We better get these guys fed. Things get a little ugly around here when they’re hungry.”

            Denise chuckled. “You used to be the same way. Even after you were born.”