The Enigma of the Mind

The Enterprise cruised through space seemingly without a purpose; its Captain James Tiberius Kirk walked the hall without a purpose without knowing where to go or what to do. He felt ripped and torn on the inside, his heart beating too fast and too slow at once, he had ruined the Vulcan, he had hurt him. The pain welled up in Kirk’s heart causing for him to lean his shoulder against a wall and fight back tears, Kirk wanted very much to wrap his arms around Spock and cry and confess how horrible he is and cry words of no sound but feeling. Kirk was pacing the hall with an intention of purpose; he was hoping to run into McCoy or Spock in hopes of catching a glance to engage in conversations or apologies. It has only been a day after the incident and Kirk felt as if it had been years since he had heard Spock say Jim in the somber poetic voice he had in his reserve. Kirk spent most of the night crying and staring blank into the emptiness of space and into the emptiness of his heart. McCoy had dressed quickly knocking over the ale in an attempt to find his pants. The crystal liquid spilled on the carpet as the iridescent bottle shattered slightly on the floor. The bottle was damaged, but it was repairable. It held a certain quality of hope to Kirk, the bottle had brought him many places before, good and bad, who was to say the outcome of this was bad. Spock would talk to him again. But how long must I wait? Kirk paced the halls rapidly in order to seem busy to remain undisturbed by passing glances and unanswered questions. Even though knew he loved Spock, he wasn’t sure if the honesty of his love would enough. The warmness Kirk felt in his stomach now turned into a heated knot twisting and churning his stomach making him lose balance and focus. Did this all happen for a reason? What was to come next, Kirk wasn’t sure, but he found a brief moment of comfort in hoping that somewhere Spock was upset and ready for an apology he would soon receive. Kirk slowly meandered down the halls hoping to gain enough courage with each step to walk to back to the room where it first all began, with a kiss.