Lost

Disclaimer: I don't own the Magnificent Seven, not making any money, just cheap thrills.

Warnings: Angst, Slash, Sexual Assault, Violence

Rating: FRT

Lost
Chapter 3

"Back off," the snapped order, accompanied by the sound of a round being jacked into the chamber, froze Chris and Ezra in their tracks.

"Vin put the gun down," Chris ordered in his most authoritative voice.

"No," Vin stubbornly refused, keeping the gun leveled at the two men.

Chris swallowed hard, his mind racing with ways to get through to Vin. "We need to talk Vin, without the gun between us."

"Can talk just fine now," Vin insisted, the gun never wavering.

"Damn it Vin, put the gun down!"

"Why should I?" came the snarled response.

"Mr. Larabee, might I make a suggestion?"

"What?"

"As we discussed earlier, Mr. Tanner is responding instinctively," he quietly replied, being careful not to let Vin hear him.

Vin watched them, his eyes dark with suspicion as they spoke. Unable to hear them, his mind was filled with the various ways they could disarm him. Instinctively, he began to form plans to counteract whatever they might try.

"What's your point Ezra?"

"Perhaps challenging and ordering him isn't the best way to achieve our goals."

"Point taken." Turning back to Vin, Chris made a point of looking slightly down as he spoke. "Vin we'd be a lot more comfortable if you'd put the gun down."

"I bet you would," Vin snapped. "Make it easier wouldn't it?"

Glancing at Ezra, Chris wondered if the con man was as confused as he was.

"What would it make easier Mr. Tanner?"

"You know what," Vin replied, his voice heavy with accusation.

"I confess I don't and I doubt Mr. Larabee has any clearer idea than I."

"Ezra's right Vin, I don't know what you mean."

"Do y'all think I'm stupid? Think I don't know what ya want?" he spat at them.

"You think...god Vin how could ya think we'd want that?" Chris asked as realization hit him with sickening clarity.

"I assure you Mr. Tanner you couldn't be further from the truth."

"How could I think...why wouldn't I think it? Didn't think Buck would ever do anything like that either, why should you be any different?"

Chris' eyes widened, damn, he should've thought of this. "I don't know how to convince ya cowboy, all I can offer ya is my word that I won't hurt you."

"It ain't enough," Vin softly uttered words he never thought he'd say to Chris.

“Have I ever given you any reason to doubt me?” Chris calmly asked, while inside he raged against Spencer and the damage he'd done.

“No,” Vin grudgingly admitted.

“Then trust me now, we just want to talk to ya Vin, I promise.”

Vin nodded, “Sit down,” he ordered, using the barrel of the gun to point at a spot several feet away from him.

Relieved that they were making some progress, however small, Chris moved to where Vin indicated and sat down. A moment later he was joined by Ezra, in spite of the mumbled complaints about sitting in the dirt.

Feeling safer now, Vin remained standing. “What do ya want to talk about?”

“We want ya to come back with...”

“No! I ain't going back there, I ccan't.”

“I know you're hurting Vin, but things aren't like they seem. Please come back to the ranch with us.”

“Ain't like they seem? So Buck didn't ra...hurt me? He didn't use me? Didn't ignore me when I asked him, begged him to stop?”

Chris flinched at the raw anguish in Vin's voice, silently vowing to track down the man responsible and kill him; slowly. “He did, but there's more going on than you know about.”

Vin stared at Chris, hurt, even as he told himself he shouldn't be surprised by Chris' defense of Buck's actions. Glancing at Ezra, he could see by the look in his eyes that he agreed with Chris. “Y'all just go on back to your lives,” he tiredly sighed.

“You are a part of our lives Mr. Tanner, therefore we can't go back to them without you.”

Chris shot Ezra a surprised look before turning his attention back to Vin. “Ez is right cowboy. Please come back with us, let us help you through this.”

He breathed a heavy sigh, lowering the gun. “I can't hear 'em Chris.”

“Can't hear who Vin?” Chris quietly asked. Now that the gun had been lowered he noticed for the first time how close to the cliff's edge Vin stood, igniting a new fear in his soul.

“My spirit animals, they ain't talking to me. I been trying to talk to 'em, trying to find answers, but they won't respond.”

As Chris listened to the raspy voice, filled with misery, his heart broke for the younger man. “Then come back with us Vin, let us help you if they won't.”

Vin eyed him suspiciously, “You just want to help?”

“Yes Vin,” Chris quickly confirmed.

“Ya ain't gonna try to, you ain't just waiting to take your turn?”

“No! No Vin,” he went on, his voice quieter now. “I don't want to hurt you, none of us do and we won't let anybody else hurt you either. No matter who it is, I promise ya cowboy. Please trust us Vin, trust me,” he plead.

Cursing himself for a fool, Vin reluctantly nodded, agreeing to return to the ranch. “I ain't giving up my gun,” he firmly told them.

“That's fine Vin, you keep your gun if it makes you feel safer, but you won't need it.”

“Y'all go first, I'll be right behind you.” He'd return to the ranch, give Chris a chance to explain the unexplainable, but he wasn't going to put himself in a vulnerable position if he could help it.

With a curt nod, Chris turned and led the way down the path to the vehicles. He wondered if Vin would really come to the ranch and if he did, would he stay when he saw Buck's truck? Thinking it over, he realized that they needed some way to insure that Vin wouldn't run off before Buck could explain about Spencer. “Hey Vin, would you mind if Ezra rides with you?”

Vin raised an eyebrow, shooting him a nervous glance. “What's wrong with your truck?”

“It's too damned small for both of us,” Chris growled.

“Indeed,” Ezra agreed. “You would be doing me a great favor if you would allow me to ride with you Mr. Tanner. One might say you would be saving my life,” he smoothly added.

“Alright, I guess ya can ride with me.”

The easy acceptance raised Chris' worry another notch. There was no way the Vin Tanner he knew wouldn't have seen through their simple ruse. Soon they arrived back at the vehicles. Climbing behind the wheel of his truck, Chris started it, turning around so that he was headed back to the main road. Starting the engine, he waited for Vin to pull in behind him. Carefully he navigated his way back to the main road. Once there, he called Nathan on his cell phone, explaining what had happened before asking him to call Josiah and fill him in.

Following behind Chris, Vin was so busy watching Ezra and the road, he didn't notice anything Chris was doing. The closer they got to the ranch, the whiter Vin's knuckles grew as his grip on the wheel tightened. A hard jerk of the wheel brought his jeep to the side of the road, the tires sliding as he slammed on the brakes.

“Mr. Tanner...Vin, are you alright?”

“Hell no!”

“I'm sorry that was an incredibly stupid question,” Ezra quietly apologized.

“I can't do this Ez,” brown curls bounced, as his chin dropped to his chest, hiding his face from view.

“I must confess I am surprised, I never suspected you would fail to live up to the name Tanner.”

“You son of a bitch,” Vin snarled, turning rage filled blue eyes on him.

“Would you have me believe a Tanner would run?”

“Damn it!” the snarled curse and the slap of skin against the steering wheel were the only sounds to be heard. “You got no right to judge me, no right to accuse me of that.”

“Vin you're my friend, I want to help you and letting you run away wouldn't be accomplishing that goal. You may hate me if you must, curse me if it will ease your pain but I won't apologize for using any weapon at my disposal in my effort to help you. The question now is; will you live up to the name Tanner and continue on to Mr. Larabee's ranch, or will you tuck your tail between your legs and run?”

The atmosphere at the ranch was tense with anticipation and anxiety as the men waited for Chris, Vin and Ezra to arrive. After speaking to Chris, Nathan hadn't wasted time telling JD what had happened, letting him hear it as he told Josiah. The young computer expert had glared at him as he heard the things Chris had told him. Turning away from Nathan, he had stared out the window, refusing to talk to the medic as they drove to Chris' ranch. Jackson had tried a couple of times to draw the younger man out, but JD had refused to talk.

When they had arrived, Buck and Josiah were already there, bringing a snarl of anger from JD. The car had barely stopped when JD threw open the door. Rushing into the house, he stalked up to Buck, punching him hard in the mouth. He smiled in grim satisfaction when Buck hit the floor.

“You feel better JD?” Buck asked from the floor, rubbing his sore jaw.

“You shouldn't be here Buck.”

“I need to explain things to Vin...”

“You think he's gonna believe this bullshit story you're throwing around?”

“You think I'm lying?” Buck didn't move from the floor, he couldn't move, JD's words hitting him like a blow to the stomach.

Josiah and Nathan exchanged a concerned glance as the scene unfolded before them. Neither man moved though, willing to let Buck and JD work this out, but ready to move in if needed.

“Seems awful convenient that some man shows up and hands you what you wanted.”

“I would never do that JD, not willingly and especially not to somebody I care about.”

“We're supposed to just take your word for it?”

“It's always been enough before.”

“That was when I thought I knew who you were.”

Buck finally climbed to his feet, looking down at the man who was a little brother to him in all but name. “So is this about your concern for Vin, or your hurt feelings?”

“What are you talking about Buck? Why would my feelings be hurt?” JD's eyes danced around the room as he spoke, suddenly uncomfortable under Buck's intense gaze.

“Because I never told you that I like men as well as women? Cause I never told you how I feel about Vin?”

“I don't care about that,” JD protested.

“Don't you?”

JD huffed out an exasperated breath. “Well then, why didn't ya tell me?”

“Because for starters it ain't none of your business how I feel about Vin. Second, I wasn't about to tell you or anybody else until I told Vin. The only reason you know now is cause of what Spencer forced me to do. Third, I don't make a secret of liking men, but I don't go around announcing it either. Besides, I mostly do go for the ladies. I'm a little more particular about the men I go for.”

“You ain't never, um, thought about me...”

Buck chuckled, “JD that'd be about as close to incest as I could get. I ain't never thought of you as anything but a brother. You're a good looking man, but I just never thought of you as anything else, just my annoying little brother, who has lousy tastes in hats.”

JD sighed, he was beginning to feel more than just a little foolish. “This Spencer character, he really does exists, doesn't he?”

“Yeah JD, I wish he didn't, but he's real.”

“I'm sorry Buck, I never should've doubted you.”

“It's alright JD, I can't really blame ya.”


Back on the roadside, Vin stared ahead at Chris' truck parked ahead, on the road leading to his ranch, waiting for Vin to make the turn. “Ya don't play fair, you know that Ez?”

“I have been accused of such before, did you have a point?” Ezra dryly asked.

Vin sighed heavily, “I can't turn away, not if I'm gonna live up to being a Tanner. It's all I've got Ez, all I've had for as long as I can remember and I ain't letting Buck take that away from me.” With renewed determination, Vin threw the jeep into gear and pulled back onto the road, turning onto Chris' road a moment later. Bracing himself for what was to come, he let his Tanner pride keep him going as he edged ever closer to the ranch. The sight of Buck's truck parked in the drive nearly destroyed his resolve, a small tsking noise from Ezra reminded him of what was at stake. Parking his jeep, he glared at the house, letting the anger he felt come to the forefront, he pushed the fear to the back of his mind. Slowly he unpeeled his fingers from the steering wheel, absently massaging his stiffening hands as he climbed from the vehicle.

“You can do this Vin,” Chris encouraged him.

Vin nodded, swallowing hard as he spotted JD looking out the window at them. “You promise ya ain't brought me here so's y'all can...” he trailed off, unable to complete the question.

“I only want to help ya Vin, that's all any of us want.”

“Why's Buck here then?”

“There's some things he needs to explain to you.”

“You expect me to forgive him?” Vin snapped. His anger growing, anger at Buck for what he'd done, anger at Chris for expecting him to forgive the man, anger at the others for expecting the same thing. He wondered, not for the first time, why it was always him that was expected to forgive everybody for the things they did to him?

“No Vin, I only want you to listen to him. It's up to you if you forgive him and I wouldn't blame you a bit if you couldn't.”

Startled, Vin stared at Chris, his jaw moving but no sound came out. “Really?” he finally managed to whisper. A nod confirmed the older man's words and Vin felt a bit of the load he carried lifting. The anger wasn't entirely gone though, especially the anger, no rage, at Buck . Squaring his shoulders, he slowly walked towards the house, letting Chris and Ezra go inside first. Taking a deep breath, he stepped through the door, stopping just inside the living room. His heart began to race with fear as he looked around the room, his breathing quickly growing ragged.

“Vin are you...I'm glad you're here,” Buck softly spoke, taking two steps towards the younger man.

He heard Buck's voice, but he had no idea what he was saying as a roaring sound filled his ears. Vin's eyes widened with fear when Buck took a step and then another. With a cry of pure fear, he pulled the gun from his waistband firing one shot. Amid the sounds of surprise and one of pain, the gun fell from nerveless fingers as Vin's mind, overcome with too much stress shut down and he collapsed to the floor like a puppet with its strings cut.

TBC.

Yes I am evil and thank you for noticing. ;) Please feed the muse with reviews and I'll try to update soon.