Palmdale on a Saturday Night

Saturday Morning, Los Angeles, Summer 1984

Bill Maxwell, as usual, didn’t bother knocking on the front door of his partner and best friend, Ralph Hinkley, when he showed up on Saturday morning. Now that Kevin had gone to live permanently with his mother Alicia, Bill didn’t have to worry about the kid making a snide comment about his being over there almost every hour the FBI agent was off-duty. Not that Bill was worried about it, of course.

“Ralph, I’m here, you ready to fly?” Bill hollered from the foyer. He looked around, trying to locate Ralph.

A muffled voice came from the master bedroom.

“In here, Bill! Putting the suit on even now!”

Bill went to the door of the room. “Sorry I’m late, I had to stop and get some coffee and doughnuts for our trip to the desert.”

Ralph checked himself in the mirror to be sure he was fastened up properly. He had the unfortunate habit of forgetting there was a fly in the pants of the suit given to him by aliens, and wanted to be sure it was secure.

He turned his back to Bill. “Here, zip me up.”

Bill stepped into the room to oblige him. The suit came together easily over his younger partner’s muscular back, as though it was made especially for him.

“Coffee? When it’s probably going to be about a hundred in the shade out there, if we’re lucky?” Ralph asked as he turned to follow Bill out.

“You’re wearing black today, Bill? I’ll be cool in my suit, but you’re going to fry!”

“It’s all I had clean,” the special agent said as he handed a hot coffee and chocolate doughnut to Ralph.

“You need a girlfriend, partner, or a maid, I don’t know which. Doughnuts for breakfast, that’s healthy,” Ralph said around the mouthful of food.

“Look who’s talkin’, this place is a dump, Ralph. Since Kevin left, you just don’t care any more.”

Ralph swallowed and sighed sadly. “Yeah, I know. I miss him. A lot. But it’s best for him this way. I was rarely home, what with school or scenarios with you. He needs a parent at home for him, even if it’s Alicia. She’s been doing well, I’ve been hearing on the grapevine, taking care of him. Got him an older teen boy to be his sitter, and I guess the two have hit it off really well. Kev’s got lots to do when Mom’s not home, and the kid makes sure he’s got his homework and chores done.”

“Listen to you, going on,” Bill chuckled, sipping the hot coffee.

The two had reclined over the couch covered with clothes and newspapers. Bill shoved debris aside on the coffeetable to set his simple breakfast on.

“Okay, suit practice. We need to work on a few things today, things we’ve only learned once and haven’t had the chance to use again since then. Like animal control, or even that mind push.”

“I thought we decided that with the mind push, we’d need plutonium or something similar, Bill.”

“Naw, what decided? We don’t know, since we’re doing this practically blind.”

The MIND PUSH, friend! That is it! While Mr Hinkley is wearing the suit, we can activate the mind push function, as they call it, without his knowledge. It reaches into his subconscious somewhat, and makes him ‘ask’ for things he may not be conscious of desiring.

Most excellent, friend. Then all we will have to do is use the device to intercept the tracking signal, having it come here so the circuit is not disrupted, thus no alarms will be activated.

Set the suit function at low power for the first part of our experiment. As their day progresses, and we see how Mr Hinkley is reacting to it, we can slowly increase it, so he will remain unaware that anything unusual is happening.

Yes, friend. And it is most fortuitous to our experiment that they are already coming toward Palmdale. We could even go there for one of the latter stages of the experiment, later today. We will likely need to find some external influence, food perhaps, for them for when the suit is removed next time. If they keep it within close proximity to themselves, we should still be able to monitor them, but we won’t be able to access the suit functions any longer to sway them.

Then let us proceed. Begin recording from both partners.

One of the aliens pushed a sequence of buttons, and the “mind push” function of the suit was activated. The other alien activated the panel that would monitor all input from the American team, both brain activity and physiological functions and levels.

“You ‘bout done, Ralph? I figure I can at least grab a garbage bag and start tossing stuff out, including our cups and wrappers.”

“Bill, that’d be nice, thanks.”

The agent had already retrieved a trash bag, and began throwing their breakfast remains and other trash he could find into it. What am I doing? he wondered, amazed that he was helping to clean his best friend’s cluttered house.

He stopped in the middle of the task, and turned to stare at Ralph.

“What? Do I have frosting on my mouth?” Ralph asked, giving a wipe across his mouth with a napkin. “Here.”

Bill stepped forward and let the napkin drop into the bag.

Something suspicious nagged at Bill’s subconscious, but he couldn’t articulate the feeling. “No, you’re fine, I just felt kinda weird for a second there.”

Careful, friend! Mr Maxwell is a very sensitive Human, as our analyses have shown. You put the mind push on lowest power?

No, it was at level 3.

Perhaps we should step it down one level?

We only have one diurnal cycle to do this, we cannot take too long, or we will be found out.

If you think that is wise, then we will proceed.

Ralph stood and stretched with a big yawn. “Probably from eating too much junk as breakfast, Bill, just like me.”

“I’m going to hit the head one more time, then we can go,” Bill said, walking to the bathroom.

“Okay, I’ll be out front!”

The two settled into the long drive to the desert, not speaking, simply being comfortable with one another. Ralph was staring out the passenger-side window, his chin in his hand. Bill was right: he needed someone too. They both did. Since he and Alicia divorced, Ralph had been too busy to meet another girl, caught up in being Vice Principal during his day, or working on “scenarios” with Bill in the afternoon and evening, and usually entire weekends at a time.

“We need to take a break, partner,” Ralph said out of the blue, sighing at the end of that declaration.

“Okay, what kind of break, kid?” Bill replied, almost too quickly.

Ralph turned to stare at him. That was too easy, he thought. “What?”

“I said, ‘what kind of break, kid?’” Bill repeated, a bit louder.

“A break, from suit scenarios. Look at us. Early Saturday morning, Summertime, it’s going to be nice this weekend, and we’re heading to the desert for suit practice.”

Bill abruptly pulled over to the side of the long, lonely desert highway.

“What’re you doing, Bill?” Ralph asked, amazed again at the unexpected response.

“You know, you’re right, Ralph. This is dumb. We can always practice on another weekend.”

“All right, Bill, what gives?” Ralph asked, suspicious.

“Whaddya mean?” his partner replied, turning to face him.

“Cleaning up stuff at my place, agreeing we need a break. I was expecting a huge argument and drag-down fight, and you agree with me?”

“What agreeing? I happen to think you’re right, that’s all.”

Ralph continued to stare at Bill, to discern if there was something off about his best friend. Bill simply raised his eyebrows, looking back, as if asking, Well?

“You said earlier you felt kind of strange. What was that?” Ralph asked.

“I dunno, it wasn’t something I could describe. Just a feeling.”

“Hmm,” was all Ralph could say in reply. He looked ahead, down the dusty highway. “So? We going, or going to sit here and bake in the sun?”

“Where do you want to go, for this break?” Bill asked. “Get a room somewhere, maybe take a day hike in the hills?”

“Palmdale.”

“What? Why Palmdale, you know I hate going there, Ralph, c’mon!”

“I just got this sudden urge to go there, Bill. Something’s up, I can feel it.”

He can FEEL it? one of the aliens exclaimed, stunned.

Perhaps using the mind push was not a good idea after all. Mr Maxwell is very sensitive, and Mr Hinkley seems to be picking that up from him in some fashion. I was under the impression the team lost their instruction books.

They did! Mr Hinkley is not aware of the connection he has with his partner, unless they are physically touching. These two know one another far more than we anticipated. Is the monitor getting all of this from their brain and physiological functions?

Indeed. This is most intriguing. Punishment or not, we may have to present this new data to our superiors when we are finished. I do not know how Mr Hinkley could sense that it is desirous of us that he come to Palmdale. Officially, we usually notify him via radio wave.

Bill Maxwell sighed in capitulation. “Well, if you’ve got this feeling, then okay. We’ll go. What’re we going to do there, park in the desert and wait for greenguys to show up?”

“I don’t know, I just know I want to go there. We never go there any way, Bill, except when the aliens tell us to. Maybe we can look around or something, see the sights.”

“Trust me, there are no sights in Palmdale, ‘cept scorpions and rattlers. And the occasional dust devil.”

“Okay, suit practice on scorpions and rattlers then. Or we could go to the Palmdale Oasis Hotel. It’s nice, I’ve seen brochures from it. It’s on an oasis that looks like it came straight from the Sahara. Golf, tennis, lawn bowling, all sorts of stuff outside.”

Bill pulled back onto the road, then gave a quick glance to his partner. He didn’t say anything, just looked for a moment.

“What?” Ralph asked again, smiling, his blue eyes mischievous.

“Tennis? Do I look like a tennis bum?”

“Not in that black outfit you don’t. You look like Billy Jack!” Ralph said, laughing at how apropos that comparison was. “That’s it, I’m going to call you Billy Jack today. Or BJ for short.”

“BJ? Funny, har har,” Bill said, laughing as well.

Ralph simply responded with a toothy grin. He loved it when Bill was in a silly mood like this. They’d been working on some intense scenarios so far in the Summer months, and it was nice to think they’d have a chance to simply kick back and relax, maybe find a couple of gals to play doubles tennis with.

“Hey, doubles tennis, Billy Jack!” Ralph said.

Bill pondered the suggestion for a moment. He was reluctant to tell his best friend that he’d been on the tennis team at the FBI Academy, way back in the day. He wasn’t in tennis shape any longer, but hell, Ralph was just a kid. He’d show him a thing or three that an old man could do on the court.

“Hmm, well yeah, we could maybe find a coupla dames to join us. Two handsome bachelors visiting sunny Palmdale for the weekend and all.” He ended that with a smirk and a slight nod at Ralph, who busted up laughing.

“What’s so funny?”

“Just trying to picture you in tennis whites is all, Billy Jack.”

“Don’t laugh too soon, partner. You ain’t seen nothin’ yet.”

Ralph just stared at his friend while the agent continued driving, thinking about the morning so far. Bill cleaning his place, picking up trash. Bill giving in so easily on the suggestion of taking a break in lieu of suit practice. Bill agreeing to playing tennis of all things. His own need to get to Palmdale.

“Something’s up, Bill,” he said, changing the subject.

“I’m wondering that, too, pard. Here, let’s turn on the radio. They always contact us that way. If they want us, they’ll get us like always.”

“Good idea, yeah. Put it on an AM station, they seem to access those more often.”

“News radio, what else would I be playing?”

They drove on, for about a half-hour, not speaking. They knew, any second, that the greenguys would break in, instructing them to continue on to the usual meeting place in the secluded desert. When no request came, the two relaxed into their seats.

“Maybe it’s just a feeling then, Bill. If they wanted us, they would’ve called by now.”

“I think so too, yeah. Maybe they’re the ones that think we should be taking a weekend off?”

“Could be, yes. All right, then, let’s go to the Oasis. How’re you for cash?”

“Hmm, not too bad. I can wear those shorts in back to play in, and I think I threw some sneakers in a while back. Prob’ly all gross by now.”

“Ew. Well, we’ll see what they have at the shop. I’m sure between the two of us, we’ll be fine. Maybe some big case will present itself, and you can write it off on the expense account!”

“Those are your tax dollars at work, bub!” Bill said, laughing at the suggestion.

“We’ll buy some decent clothes near town, not the hotel. Tennis whites. Something for later this evening, although I think that black outfit you’ve got on will be okay for dancing. What is that shirt, silk?” Ralph said, reaching over to feel the sleeve. The shirt was black with thin red pinstripes, tucked into Bill’s black Levi’s.

Bill shrugged his shoulders. “Yeah, thought I’d indulge a while back. It’s been hiding in my closet for forever. Finally dug it out this morning when I couldn’t find anything else. I think it’s gotten smaller.”

“No, partner, you’ve filled out some. All that running around we’ve been doing lately.”

Bill took a deep breath, expanding his chest, making the seams on the shirt stretch against him. “Hmm, maybe you’re right. I’m sure the ladies won’t have any complaints.”

Ralph left his hand there, and stared at Bill. His partner’s eyes, not hidden behind the usual aviators, reflected the light off the highway and surrounding sand. I never noticed how green his eyes can be, Ralph thought, surprised that it would occur to him to even wonder such a thing.

“Your eyes, Bill, they’re green!”

“Brown, green, make up your mind. Like I said back then, my mommy always said hazel. What’re you doing any way, staring at me? Weirdo.”

Ralph laughed again, turning to face forward. “You just look different, is all. I think it’s that shirt.”

“Yeah, Bill Maxwell in silk. There’re some things you don’t know about me, partner,” he added cryptically.

“Such as?”

“Hmm, you’ll find out.” And Bill simply left it at that.