A Collection -

Disclaimer: Firefly and Serenity belong to Joss Whedon, Fox and Universal. I own nothing and cannot pretend to. This is all for love and fun.



Warning: This story takes place AFTER the events of "Serenity", so if you haven't seen it yet, you might want to. ;)

What? You don't like River sex stories? Just try it... I think you might like it.





Making Them Whole





Serenity was asleep. Deep in the black, her corridors were darkened. In the engine room, there was a warm glow from the engines as she slid quietly through the 'verse. In the dining room, a single yellow light welcomed the insomniac, the late night snack-hunter, but it was empty there. On the bridge were the only stirrings of wakefulness.



In the green and orange gleam of the console lights, River's face was flushed, her dark eyes wide one moment, and shuttered closed the next. Her body squirmed against the warmth beneath her, behind her, surrounding her, and she tilted her head up to the warm kiss that met her lips.



Zoe was stretched in the co-pilots chair, one boot planted on the console, her knee raised to support River's lower back as the girl trembled in her lap. Zoe wasn't sure when she'd first invited River here. She wasn't sure it even mattered now. She shifted her fingers buried in River's warmth and the girl sighed and pressed closer.



Her voice was an insistent whisper. "More...."



Zoe knew what she wanted but shook her head slightly. "No, baby. Not here." Then she kissed River's neck gently. "You can come this way. I know you can."



River shot Zoe a glowering frown that extended to the pout in her voice. "No. More!"



Zoe simply continued slipping two of her long fine fingers gently through River's soft, slick folds, raising her other hand to stroke the girls dark satin hair back from her face.



River sighed, shifting to press against Zoe's hand, taking her in and then clenching her muscles to trap the invading fingers tightly. Then she let go, turning around to straddle Zoe and darn near spraining her wrist in the process. River's hands clenched the back of the chair on either side of Zoe's head, her feet pinned between Zoe's thighs and the arm-rests. She twisted down hard as she gazed pleadingly into Zoe's eyes.



"More."



Zoe smiled softly, her affection for River warming her gaze. No one had warmed her heart recently like this girl did. But she shook her head and gently extricated her fingers, "No. Not here. What if something happens?"



River's smile broadened and she gave a little huff, letting Zoe know exactly what she wanted to happen.



"Not like that." Zoe admonished. "With the ship? How am I supposed to fly this ship with only one hand free?"



Now River sighed and rocked forward slowly, kissing Zoe's lips and then her neck. "All right."



"Good girl." Zoe answered softly, kissing her back. She brought her knees together, both feet on the console, propping River's weight up. Gently, she wriggled her fingers a little deeper and shifted her thumb to rub lightly over the swollen pearl beneath it. The girl gasped, a soft whimper of sound, and Zoe rejoiced in it.



How her love for this girl had healed her, she still didn't know.





---------------------------





River was so much younger, so seemingly delicate, and yet more deadly than even the girl herself knew.



Zoe had been broken after Miranda. She was well aware of it, and well aware of how hard she worked to hide it. She knew that she lived and walked through a dark haze of anger and sorrow. That every breath she took, every word she spoke, every single movement that she made was done in defiance, in determination not to the let the world know that they had taken away from her the only one who truly loved her, truly understood her. The world had taken away her heart and her love and she would never ever let them know how much it hurt.



She had been on the bridge, taking the sleep cycle watch, as she always did now, unable to sleep in their bed now that it was empty. River had come up and sat down on the floor, her back against the console supports, just watching her.



"What you want, River baby?" Zoe still talked to the girl as though she was the broken child she had been before, back when Simon had first smuggled her onboard. She could sense River liked it, like to feel as though some things hadn't changed, even though Mal treated her like a grown woman now, and Jayne treated her like a little poisonous spider who might bite.



Kaylee and Simon, when they could be spared to think on River at all, treated her like a kid sister. But Zoe called her River-baby, and smiled at her in that fond way she always had. She tried not to let things change between the two of them just because River was an adult now, and a more than capable pilot.



"Want you." River had said calmly, her dark eyes unreadable in the dim lights from the console.



"What? What do you mean?" Zoe flipped the sensors to high range and turned her full attention back to River.



River tilted her head, looking at her in the darkness. "You're broken. Like me."



Zoe tried to be offended, felt the hard jerk of pain in her heart and willed it to turn to anger, but it would not. It remained pain. "What? I'm not broken, River. Neither are you, any more."



River nodded her head slowly, her hands wrapped around her slender knees, over her blue floral skirt. Gorram girl was barefoot again. One day she was going to stub a toe or pick up a splinter.



"You don't know how to go on without him." River's voice was soft, sad, showing her own grief. "I don't know how to go on WITH them, and yet I do. You'll learn how, too."



Zoe didn't know what to say. She sat staring at the little dinosaur on the console. A stegosaur?



"Triceratops. Not his favorite. Tyranasaur was his favorite." River whispered. "I miss him, too. Let me in. Let me share."



"River? What are you talking about?" Zoe started to push back in the chair, held her arms out to stop whatever was happening, but River was on her feet and stepped into Zoe's hands, taking them in her own, little strong fingers wrapping around trigger-calloused ones.



"Let me share." The girl said wistfully. "I won't let go. I won't let you fall. The memories are too deep, too big. Eat you up. Gobble gobble. " Her dark gaze turned strong and reassuring. "But I won't let them. I'll hold you here."



Zoe found her hands clenching around River's as the girl leaned into her, placed a light kiss on her forehead. She smelled of Kaylee's apple soap and the faint antiseptic scent of the infirmary. Her hair was still damp from her shower. "River, I don't..."



Then River did the most amazing thing. She placed her forehead against Zoe's, squeezing her hands, and she just sighed.



When River sighed out, slow and easy, letting her breath linger on Zoe's face, the memories came. They built and grew and brightened, and Wash was there.



He was laughing from the very seat in which Zoe was sitting. He was at the kitchen table, in that god awful orange tropical shirt; he was arguing with Mal. He was smiling at her, naked and proud and in love. He was touching her face. He was yelling at her "What this marriage needs is one less husband!" He was gazing at her in concern, telling her to be careful. He was proud of her. So proud. And she was so proud of him.



Before she could breathe in again, the tears were falling. They came in a torrent, rolling down her face, soaking the collar of the soft blouse she was wearing, rolling under the leather coils of her necklace. Oh how she missed him, how she treasured every memory that she had shut away from her wounded heart! Wash. Her Wash. Her husband. And through it all, River was there, breathing in and out, slow sighs, comforting sighs, foreheads pressed together, hands clinging so hard that Zoe knew that River was strong enough to hold her, not to let her fall into the memories that soared from her mind.



River let the tears come, too. Let hers mingle with Zoe's, shared the womans grief and mingled it with her own. She kept breathing slowly, feeling the waves as they flowed happy and then ebbed sad before roaring angry, and slipping back out to simply loving. Time passed and the images began to fade quietly, back into the static that was life. Zoe's tears slowed, and she felt shame flush through her at her weakness.



"Shhh." River's voice whispered to her, "Not weak. Not alone."



Zoe started to raise her head, let go of River's hands. "River, I..."



River's mouth tilted down and closed over hers, quieting her. Zoe would wonder later, much later, why she allowed that kiss, why she didn't back away, but at the time, it was as natural as walking, as eating, as breathing. River had kissed her slowly, tenderly, her lips sweet and small and soft and Zoe let it happen. She'd never been kissed by a woman before, not like that, and it was... it was everything being kissed by a man surely wasn't. Tender, gentle and quiet.



River had stood back then, brushing the tears from Zoe's cheeks with both her hands, lovingly wiping away the tracks of grief. She smiled, sweet and secretive. "Mal is coming. I'll be in my room, if you don't want to be alone."



Zoe had watched the girl slip quietly out of the room and move with her graceful, purposeful dancers stride down the corridor. She felt relieved, still saddened, still swept up in the flood of memories that had encompassed her. Then she heard Mal's stride coming closer and checked all the instrument panels and scrubbed at her face before he arrived.



When he'd taken over for the early morning watch, she'd stood in the middle of the galley, trying to make up her mind. She didn't want to go to her bunk. She had just immersed herself in every memory of her life with Wash and she couldn't bear to go there now, to their room. His room, she remembered. She had moved in with him when they'd gotten together. Jayne had her old bunk now. But to go to River?



She wandered the halls, down into the cargo bay, just exploring, just feeling the ship. Or so she told herself, even as she found herself turning towards the infirmary and then past it to the passenger dorms.



River's door was open and she was sitting cross-legged on the bed, a notebook in her lap.



"Whatcha doing?" Zoe asked, as though it was perfectly normal for her to be standing outside of River's door.



River held up the paper she was sketching. "You."



Zoe came in and closed the door behind her, coming to sit on the bed beside River. What she saw made her gasp. It was a sketch of herself, her face and hair and neck. But her mouth was open, her head tilted back, and her eyes half-lidded in passion...



"River? Why did you draw this?"



The girl smiled and tilted her head, laying the sketch aside to put her hands over Zoe's. "Beauty. Want to see you."



And then River shifted, straddling Zoe's lap and pressing her down into the bed. "Want to to see you beautiful like that. Know you as beautiful like that."



Zoe frowned, something inside her arguing, but River kissed her again, and she felt the touch of that gentleness that she had experienced on the bridge waken something inside her. "River-baby..."



River drew back a bit and smiled. "You rest. Let me."



For some reason that made perfect sense. Zoe let the girl kiss her again, was touching her with her own hands, and they were slipping out of clothes, lying side by side, touching and kissing.



When Zoe woke, River was asleep against her, holding her to her breasts as though she was a small child. The image made Zoe smile as she slipped from River's arms.



"Going?" River asked, opening one sleepy eye.



Zoe reached for her shirt. "Uh huh. Your brothers gonna be up, wondering where you are."



River grinned now, her mischief gaze that of the wicked brat-sister. "It's good for him to wonder."





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After that, they had been the height of discretion. For weeks, River would visit her on the bridge, or she would slip to River's room after the ship slept. Neither said anything to anyone



Simon noticed something first, speaking up at breakfast one morning. "You look good, mei mei. Are you sleeping better?"



"Better dreams now." River had answered, sipping from the mug of tea she held in both hands.



"Oh. That's good." Simon had answered with a smile. "Is the new treatment working?"



River hadn't looked at Zoe, but Zoe felt a bare foot nudge her knee under the table and had to suppress a smile as her lover answered him, "Not all treatments do the same things, Simon."



"Well, I know that. That's why I want to make sure that what I'm giving you is helping." Simon had explained patiently but River had laughed at him.



"You're such a boob sometimes." But there had been love in her voice when she said it and Simon had just shaken his head at her.



They didn't get caught out for several weeks more. River had come to visit on the bridge. They'd cuddled together in the pilots chair, watching the stars pass by, losing track of time just being. Suddenly River had jumped off of Zoe's lap and stood back.



"River-baby? What's wrong?"



"Something goin' on up here I should know about?" Mal's voice came from the doorway, puzzled and a little worried. He hadn't seen what had been going on, just River jumping away from Zoe suddenly.



"No, Captain. Why?" Zoe focused her eyes out the window at the stars and River leaned with her back against the storage locker, looking down at her bare feet.



"Well, I just come up the stair and River jumps like something stung her. Now you're both pretendin' I ain't even in the room. There somethin' wrong?"



"No." River said softly, her gaze raising from her feet to meet Mal's uncomprehending gaze. "Something is right."



"Uh huh." Mal looked from River, who was staring at him, to Zoe, who was staring ahead out the window. Was she smilin'? "Zoe, you smilin' at somethin?"



"No, sir." And the soldier snapped into place, the smirk gone in a moment.



Now River huffed slightly. "Mal. Don't live up to your name. I'll be in my room, Zoe."



And the girl flitted out of the bridge, a smile on her face.



"What? What's that supposed to mean?" Mal stared after River for a moment, confusion on his face. "Ain't I supposed to live up to my name."



"She means definition, not reputation, Sir." Zoe didn't bother to clarify; just stood up and stretched. "Bridge is yours. All's quiet. We should be coming up on Whitefall in about four hours."



But Mal paused before sliding into the pilots seat. "You know I don't like secrets on my boat. If you two are planning some kind of mutinee I'd mighty sure like to know about it."



"Mutinee never crossed our mind, sir."



"Our mind? You sharin' minds with River now?"



The way Mal said it, he meant it as a joke, but Zoe recognized the truth of it like a punch in the stomach. She stared at him for a moment, letting her thoughts gather. She nodded with the certain calm she knew Mal had come to rely on. "Somethin' like that, sir."



"Wait. You're tellin me... What?"



Zoe had grinned at him then, amused by his lack of comprehension. "Not a problem is it, Sir?"



"I ...uh... no. Not... I guess." Mal blustered for a minute, pretending to check the sensors, even thought they were blank.



"Good. Glad to hear it, Sir." Zoe answered crisply. "Call me when we get ready to make landfall."



----------------

Once Mal knew, there didn't seem to be much point in hiding it from the others.



"Don't tell." River had said, her fingers idly stringing through Zoe's curls, pulling them straight and watching them coil back up. "Show. So they understand."



It made perfect sense to Zoe. That day, the job was hot and dusty, but Patience paid, and they were back in the black with spare food and spare coin. Dinner was a group celebration, with Mal breaking out wine.



River had forsaken her spot between Jayne and Inara and moved to the seat beside Zoe. As the food came around, Zoe poured River's wine as well as her own. No one seemed to notice. Spirits were too high. Mal was recounting his dialogue with Patience, pursing his lips and glaring down the table with one eye squinted in a fair imitation of the old prune. River was laughing, bright and high and happy, and she pressed her head to Zoe's shoulder, opening herself so that Zoe could feel that happiness too, could find it and build on it.



Zoe put her arm around the girl's shoulders, even as she responded to Mal's story. "You should have seen the old bird! I thought she was gonna shoot us both just on general principle!"



Everyone laughed and then Jayne belched loudly. "Well, so long as she paid up, I call it good."



"As long as she paid up and nobody got shot." Simon clarified.



"Nobody keeps gettin' shot, you'll be outta work, Doc." Mal quipped, but Simon wasn't listening.



He'd glanced down the table and Zoe saw his forehead crease as he saw the way River was leaning on her. Zoe didn't respond to it, except to note to herself how they had that in common, brother and sister, frowning their brows together when they were worried. It was kinda cute.



"Mei mei? Are you tired?" Simon asked, and everyone's attention turned to their end of the table. Zoe wanted to strangle him as all eyes took in the sight of River leaning against her, how her arm draped the slim shoulders.



River had raised her head and smiled at him, her words drawing more meaning from the past than the present, "Not anymore."



"Oh." He'd answered, obviously taken aback. "All right then."



But that moment of attention was all it had taken. Inara's eyes had widened just a fraction. Kaylee was looking at them with her head cocked, obviously working something out. And Jayne was just right out staring.



She was trying to think of something to say to get him to stop when the big man cleared his throat and spoke up. "Zoe, you ain't gonna eat that last biscuit, pass it down, would ya."



River gave a small sigh, and Zoe grinned as she pitched the last biscuit down the table and Jayne snagged it out of the air. So the mercenary hadn't noticed anything after all. Thank God! Zoe didn't think she could tolerate the smirks and teasing from Jayne. He was down there smearing butter substitute on his biscuit with his steak knife, not lookin' at either of them. River patted Zoe's knee under the table and Inara distracted the table by pouring out more wine. Zoe found the tension in her shoulders easing and took a slow sip, savoring the tangy flavors on her tongue. Beside her, River sighed a little and she knew that the girl was savoring it, too.



"So, how long you two been boffin' it behind our backs?" Jayne asked casually, popping a huge junk of biscuit in his mouth and chewing it with his mouth open.



Simon choked on his wine.



"JAYNE!" Kaylee jumped up and started patting Simon's back.



Inara rubbed her forehead like she was getting a head-ache, and Mal looked like he didn't know whether to smack Jayne or just shoot him.



Zoe froze, glancing down at River and thought quickly how to best protect her. Zoe was the older one. The responsible one. She had to have an answer. Just... say something...anything...Ah, screw it! "None of your gorram business!"



"So ya are humpin'?" Jayne winked one blue eye, his grin wicked now that they'd fallen for his trap.



Zoe moved to push her chair back, fists clenched, but River stayed her with a gentle hand. She met Jayne's eyes down the table, her smile bratty and clever. "Just jealous it's not you."



"Well, yah." Jayne admitted, but his grin didn't fade, although he diverted his eyes to his plate, obviously not bothered by the situation.



"So..umm... mei mei...?" Simon started to ask, but River cut him off cleanly.



"Not your business, Simon. Girl grew up."



"I know. I'm just concerned." Simon looked to Mal for support. Mal shrugged and Simon realized he already knew. "AM I the only one who didn't have a clue?"



"Hell, mister top three percent, ya can't know everything." Jayne barked.



Zoe stood up then, taking River's hand and tugging her along. "Come on, River-baby. I think we've caused enough trouble for one night."



Simon had stood up, too. "Zoe, wait."



The soldier stood and looked back. Her face was still, her brown eyes deep and fathomless as she met Simon's gaze. She did not speak and River stood still beside her, arms crossed.



"I'm sorry." He sat down again, slumping in his chair, Kaylee rubbing his back. "River, are you sure you know what you're doing?"



The girl looked across at her brother, her smile tender and sweet. And then she swept the rest of their family with her gaze. "Yes. They were broken. I'm making them whole."



As she led Zoe out of the room by her hand, they heard Mal's captain voice behind them, addressing the rest of the table. "Y'all stay out of their business. They're adult women. Anything they want you to know, I reckon they'll tell you."



River squeezed Zoe's hand and she'd squeezed back.



------------------------





Now, the girl... no, Zoe corrected herself, the woman, the beautiful woman, was tilted back, her head dropped nearly backwards over Zoe's knees as she watched the stars out of the viewer. Her mouth was open, and her face flushed. Zoe rubbed her free hand under River's blouse, over the taut stomach muscles, up to the high, smooth breasts, rejoicing in the way River responded to every touch, every minute shift of Zoe's body.



Her chest heaved with her little pants and sighs and Zoe leaned forward to kiss her stomach as she arched against her.



River's mind opened, reaching for Zoe and Zoe reached right back. The two shattered halves, heart and soul and mind, met, melded, breached the grief and loss and fear and pain, found solace, and made them whole.