One Night Changes Everything

Remaining in a daze still she entered her home, eyes watery as the tears continue to come.

What had she done?!

Shaking her head she covered her mouth as she tried to calm herself down. She had just managed to screw up the one good thing in her life that she had going.

Monk was a friend. Her best friend. Tonight��tonight she had crossed a line that she should have never even seen for far away it should have been.

It just happened. Because of her!

Why did she even start it?!

Mr. Monk had been scared stiff��and she had pushed him into the act.

�Oh Gawd!� She said again to herself as she sat on her sofa and closed her eyes. Pulling her legs to her chest she leaned her face onto her legs and hid the tears that she cried.

Why?! WHY??

This wasn�t like her. It wasn�t her at all. Yet, even with the absurdity of what she had done, she knew that she would always remember everything about that night.

Her mind was so filled with soo many different thoughts that she didn�t realize how much time had passed since she had arrived home. Suddenly she found Julie standing in front of her with sleep still evident in her stance.

She had grown soo much in the past few years. Becoming a lady right before her eyes, Natalie prayed that her daughter didn�t make the same mistakes that she had.

At the moment Julie looked at her through sleep filled eyes with concern.

�Mom are you ok?�

Natalie sniffed hard and stood up.

�Yeah baby I�m ok�just go back to bed ok,� saying this with a quick kiss to her daughter�s hair.

Julie stared at her mother for a little while longer, torn between sleep and finding out what was causing her mother to cry. In the end, Natalie�s nod for her to go ahead decided for her. Her mother would tell her in the morning.

As soon as Julie left the room, Natalie tilted her head up and let out a long sigh.

Everything had just changed. Mr. Monk�Adrian�was not a man that dealt with change well.

But what had happened between them had been more than just change.

Monk hadn�t made an advance towards her��but she had done all of the damage herself.

Making her way to the bathroom she stripped down and let the warm water wash over her.

God she felt dirty. Not because of the act itself��but of how she had initiated the act of intimacy.

He wasn�t ready for anything like this! He might never be ready!

Starting something with a man like Monk would only lead to disaster. How was she ever going to be able to look him in the eye again?

As she cleaned herself flashes of events from earlier popped into her mind, causing her to cry even more than she had.

God it��it had been incredible. As odd as it sounded��Adrian Monk had been��amazing.

She had always thought that Monk would be disgusted at the act of sex��even now she thought it ridiculous of all the phobias he had, how he slowly accept her advance.

Having stepped out of the claw foot tub, she leaned her head against her mirror.

The moment in which reality set in for both of them had been more than terrifying. He freaked out��completely.

She had stuttered an apology and had run from him as fast as she could, dressing as she ran out of his apartment. And now, she thought maybe, out of his life forever.

God the way he reacted afterward.

She swallowed as the tears continued to clog her throat.

Natalie felt like she had just ruined the best relationship that she had ever had. And why?

Sex.

How stupid could she be?!

Slowly she made her way to bed. Heart heavy with regret and despair, she snuggled her face in her pillow and tried not to think about him.

But how was she supposed to do that? Adrian Monk had become a part of her life. And now she had to live with the major possibility of him never wanting to see her again.

Closing her eyes she tried to find sleep, not realizing that Adrian Monk wouldn't sleep all night.

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