Rise And Fall

Chapter 2 - Dead Man Walking

Nathan couldn't believe the nerve of Tim, his former boyfriend and best friend, showing up after nearly a year of absence and expecting everything to be the same. Lucas and Nathan were just starting to get along and now something new had to come in and complicate things. It irked Nathan to no end.

"You okay, Nate?" Tim asked, putting down the controller. They were playing NBA Live on Nathan's playstation and Nathan had just pretty much given the last three games to his friend.

"What? Yeah, I'm fine," Nathan said, brushing off any concern. He was wondering where Lucas was. He hoped the blonde was okay. He had seem extremely upset when he left and Nathan wanted nothing more than to take the other Scott in his arms and kiss all the pain away. But he couldn't do that because of Tim, because of the fact that Lucas didn't know Nathan was in love with him, and because it more than likely wouldn't change anything.

"You seem kind of out of it," TIm commented.

Tim put on a huge 'I'm extremely stupid' front to everyone so he could be the clown of the team and just goof off without any reason why. People expected it from him and he never disappointed. Nathan used to love every inch of the teen, because he was actually extremely intelligent. Tim was also very perceptive, which used to be nice when Nathan didn't want to talk. But now, it was just down right annoying. He didn't want to explain his feelings to this guy. He wanted to go after Lucas.

"I was going to have a nice time by myself with that pizza and then you showed up and ruined it. So yeah, excuse me for being kind of out of it," he snapped angrily, not really caring about Tim's feeling at that point.

"Gee, I see the kind of respect I get," Tim said sarcastically. "I have been gone forever and I just wanted to spend sometime with my boyfriend."

"Ex," Nathan said through gritted teeth. Glaring at Tim, he said, "You are no longer my boyfriend. You gave that up when you left without a word to me or to anyone else. So you can get the hell out of here."

"And if I said I wasn't going anywhere?" Tim asked, his voice extremely seductive as he leaned in and started playing with Nathan's shirt tails. "What would you do?"

"I'd push you off and tell you to get the hell out of my apartment. You are no longer welcome here," Nathan said coldly, shoving Tim away from him and standing up. "It was nice knowing you Tim. Don't let the door hit you on the ass on the way out."

"This is about Lucas, isn't it?" Tim demanded, his tone angry as well. Nathan stared at the other brown haired teen, shocked. How does he know that?

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Nathan said coolly, hoping his voice wasn't giving him away. Tim gave Nathan a look.

"Right. And I am supposed to believe that when both you two were drooling over each other all night? And the whole nonprofit pizza catering service was a bunch of crap," he said. A realiziation hit him straight in the face. "You two were going to do it tonight!"

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Tim!" Nathan yelped, punching his friend on the arm. "And get the hell out of here!"

"Nathan Scott, the fag of Tree Hill," Tim taunted. Getting off the couch, he added, "It's all right, your secret is safe with me."

"Wait!" Nathan said, closing his eyes as Tim got up to go out the door. The other brown haired man turned to look at him.

"Yeah?"

"Stay here tonight. It's the least I can do after what you've done for me in the past," he said, regretting every word. He just wanted to go see Lucas and now he was stuck with Tim. Could life get any worse?

"Great! It's Tim Time! Tim is in the house!" the shorter man said, putting his fist through the air. How in the world could I have ever liked him? Nathan thought as he pulled a slice of pizza out of the box from the light stand beside the couch and taking a bite. I just hope my brother is okay.

Lucas finally slowed down and stopped, bending over to try and catch a breath of air. His heart pounded painfully in his chest, making the effort close to impossible. He panted for a few moments, before sucking in a huge breath of oxygen and stood up. The world around him swam horribly and it seemed to be spinning.

"Luke!"

Nathan's voice cut through the fog like a hot knife through butter. Lucas quickly turned around and blanked out his emotions, a trick he had successfully learned how to do while staying at Dan's. Instead of appearing in pain and out of breath, he merely looked winded and angry.

"What do you want, Nathan?"

His voice was slightly breathless and still had an undercurrent of pain in it. This time, the pain wasn't from the HCM. It was from the betrayal he felt at Nathan's actions. Sure, he and his brother were barely good friends, but still, the obvious choice of Tim over him hurt him.

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay. You seemed kind of upset when you left," Nathan said, taking afew hesitant steps forward. Lucas responded by taking a step or two back. Nathan sighed and put up his hands in surrender. "Sorry for asking."

"No, it's okay," Lucas said, inwardly feeling relieved that his brother was here. It was nice, knowing that someone out there actually cared. His mom was in New Zealand chasing after Andy, Keith was somewhere out of touch searching for Emily, Dan was in the hospital, Brooke was in California, Peyton was dealing with her own crisis, and Haley was on tour.

"I'm really sorry about Tim showing up like that," Nathan said, taking another step forward. This time, Lucas didn't back away, but continued to breathe heavily.

"It's okay, Nate, I don't mind," Lucas said, closing his eyes for a moment.

"Don't do that," Nathan pleaded, making the elder Scott's eyes snap open.

"Do what?" he asked, raising his eyebrows questioningly. Nathan looked at him, an unreadable emotion in his beautiful blue eyes.

"Close your eyes," he said, reaching out for Lucas's hand. "I can't see the real you when you do that."

Lucas stayed still. It wasn't volunitary; his chest hurt too much to do much else. He allowed Nathan to come nearer.

"I'm sorry," Lucas whispered, reveling at the closeness between the two of them. He wanted to get nearer, but his heart wouldn't let him, both physically and emotionally. He didn't want to be shunned by Nathan in public and be his secret fuck buddy at the same time. He wanted everything with Nathan.

"It's okay," Nathan murmured, now standing right in front of his brother. "You didn't know."

"Nathan..." Lucas trailed off as Nathan leaned in. The younger Scott's lips were just inches from his own. Lucas longed with all his heart to just close the gap and be swept away in the moment. But his thoughts were an emotional turmoil. If he allowed this, and Nathan took it back tomorrow and spread rumors around the town that Dan Scott's illigetiamate son was gay, then it would horrible. One kiss wasn't worth all that, was it?

"Do you know how long I have wanted this?" Nathan whispered, gently running a hand through Lucas's blonde hair. "How long I have wanted to be with you?"

"I want it to, Nathan," Lucas said, biting his bottom lip. "But the thing is, what about Tim? What about Dan and Deb? What about Brooke, Peyton, and Haley?"

He had said the magic word. Nathan broke away, thoroughly disugsted.

"She is no longer my wife," he said angrily. Lucas took another step back, hissing in pain as he did so. His heart hurt worse with each breath he took, and he knew it was only a matter of time before he blacked out.

"Nathan, I have something I need to tell you," he managed to get out. Nathan turned back to him, confusion and anger visible in his face. That softened into a look of pure concern as he saw Lucas. The blonde teen was covered in sweat, and he was breathing heavily.

"Luke, what is it?" he asked. Lucas looked up at him, his face turning pale in the moonlight.

"I haven't been totally honest with you," he admitted, sitting down. It revealed the pressure and pain in his chest. He was worried that he might not get back up.

"Lucas?" Nathan prompted, his voice sounding forced. "What haven't you been 'totally honest' about?"

"My heart," Lucas said, looking away. His voice dropped to a whisper so quiet, Nathan had to strain to hear him. "I have HCM, Nathan."