Abhorrence

Abhorrence - a feeling of repugnance or loathing; one that is disgusting, loathsome, or repellent.


Phil was not effective at hiding his emotions from Derek. Whether it was because the man could sense it, or because he was just an open book he wasn’t sure why, but after the meeting, Derek cornered him in the loo with questions regarding the state of his health. Phil wanted to say it was more his mental health than anything, but that would prompt Derek to ask more questions, and Phil didn’t want to spend any more time with the man than necessary lest his body start reacting in inappropriate ways, like it inevitably did when he was in close proximity to the medium. He managed to get away with a muttered “Fine, thank you.”

Now, as he sat in his car pointedly avoiding thinking about Derek, he wondered if he was just freaking himself out about the investigation. After all, The Exorcist did scare the ever-living crap out of him; maybe he was just thinking back to that? He certainly didn’t want to get possessed, and although not a religious man by nature, he had a strong urge to attend a mass at church. It wouldn’t stop him from going to hell, but maybe it was an effective roadblock for any demon wishing to take over his pitiful soul.

He carefully pulled out into traffic and headed toward his small flat to pack a few essential things for the investigation. He found himself lost in thought during most of the drive home, only occasionally remembering to stop at red lights and designated signs, and pulled up next to the curb outside an antique looking building with yellowish bricks and arched doorways. He made his way up the stairs, noticing the lift was all the way at the top floor. He pushed his way wearily through the door, accidentally slamming it shut effectively scattering al the cats that had come to greet him. He was too tired to care much about the felines winding themselves around his legs, but he did call the next-door lady to see if she wouldn’t mind watching them for a few more days while he was out. He heard the exasperation in her voice but decided to ignore it, the last thing he needed was to piss off his only cat-sitter. He might not like her, but he sure as hell liked his cats and he wouldn’t abandon them to starve for a few days while he got the shit scared out of him by a house possessed by demons.

He threw some things into his not quite unpacked suitcase, leaving his toothbrush and other toiletries undisturbed in the numerous pockets on its front. He cared enough to fold his clothes so as not to get them wrinkled, and when he was done, he collapsed sideways on his bed, his feet handing over the edge. His cats eventually joined him, purring and jostling for the most comfortable position around his body and the swish of a tail against his head eventually put him to sleep.

It only seemed like minutes to him, but when his phone rang and he woke up to look at the clock, he was surprised to see he’d been asleep for almost three hours. And boy did that do wonders for him. He levered himself off the bed, reaching for the phone while toeing on his shoes; it was almost time for him to be back at the studio.

“Hello?” He couldn’t help the scratchiness of his throat or the thickness of his voice. He started zipping his suitcase-

“Hey Phil, somehow I knew you’d be asleep.”

-and he froze at hearing Derek’s amused voice over the line. “H-hey Derek,” he choked. Then he berated himself. Good job, real middle school you prat. “What’s going on?” He clenched the edge of his nightstand a little harder than necessary.

“I caught Yvette asleep in the conference room and just found out half the crew was knackered enough to fall asleep in the lounge, so I figured you’d be that way too.” Phil let out a silent breath. “I called to make sure you’d be on time, you know how Yvette is.”

“I feel like I’m in a hotel,” Phil said, wincing at the loud meow right by his ear. He’d forgotten to feed the cats. Again. He was, however, pleased at Derek’s short laugh. Even if it was only short. “I’m all packed and ready, let me just-“ he nudged what cats he could reach to the floor, “feed my cats.” One of them, the one that just kind of showed up out at one of the investigations which Phil took pity on and took home, clawed at his leg in an attempt to get back onto the bed. “Down, you shit,” he said, rubbing his leg absentmindedly as Derek said something about the crew getting to stay in a fairly nice hotel this time round.

“Anyway, I’ll leave you to it, so Yvette doesn’t get mad at me if you end up being late,” he said.

“Way to look out for fellow team members,” Phil muttered, not much looking forward to dealing with Yvette after the meeting. He generally liked the woman, but she just didn’t see what she was getting them, especially Derek, into.

“Phil?” Derek’s voice brought him out of his thoughts.

“Hey, Derek?”

“Yes?”

“Do you really agree with Yvette’s decision on going to this house? I mean, aren’t you worried that something might, you know, take you over?”

“By something do you mean a demon?”

“Well, yeah.”
Derek let out a sigh. He was silent for a time, as if choosing what words he wanted to say. “The thought did cross my mind. In all honesty, I don’t know how strong one has to be to repel a demon, and I’m not sure if I am that strong. If there are indeed demons in the house and they do try to, take me over, as you put it, I’ll try my hardest to repel them.”

“What if it’s not enough?” Phil hated how small his voice sounded. He resisted the urge to bring his knees up under his chin and rock back and forth.

“Then that’s why I have you and Karl and Stuart there.” Phil must have made a distressed noise, because Derek’s voice softened and he said, “I know you’re concerned about me, Phil, and you have no idea how that touches me, but I wouldn’t be going if I knew I couldn’t handle it.”

“Yeah, I’ll just remind you of that when you’re clawing your eyes out and eating dead bugs off the floor.” Phil hung up, and ignored the wave of guiltiness washing over him. So what if Derek was going through with this even though he knew something bad could happen to him? Screw him; if the man was going to be prideful about it and not show weakness, Phil wouldn’t bring himself to care what happened.

If only he could make himself believe that.