Death Of Innocence

Part 4

Age: 12 Years 7 Months

Jack and Samantha sat in the rec room watching television with the other residents of the orphanage at the insistence of the staff who occasionally would attempt to integrate the pair socially with the other residents. The pair were bored by the supposedly entertaining show the other residents were enraptured by. Jack was seated on a cushion at the back of the living room and Samantha was on a couch with a bunch of girls. A few minutes into the show, Samantha had excused herself to the bathroom. When she returned, she quietly slipped in the back of the room and joined Jack.

Sitting on a cushion beside him in the darkened room, Samantha slipped her hand in his. Their fingers caressed and they communicated silently as they endured the flashing television. Since their first kiss, the pair had enjoyed many more kisses. Afternoons were spent dancing and kissing, sometimes they would read instead, but snuggled closely together as they did so. In the beginning they only kissed standing up, but one day while lying on the floor reading, they kissed and found the full body contact felt very nice.

Although they both knew the logistics of sex, the young couple hadn't given the matter any real consideration. Jack nearly died of embarrassment when Samantha found the Kama Sutra among the books in the attic and asked if he'd read it. Blushing furiously he told her yes, but tried to dissuade her from reading it. Jack's reluctance to let her read the book only incited her curiosity and Samantha borrowed the taboo volume. The next day she could barely look at Jack, embarrassed that he knew what she'd been reading. At the same time she felt slightly comforted after having read the book because the things she felt when she kissed Jack made a bit more sense now. Although their mutual embarrassment had created a couple days of awkwardness, once it abated their was a new closeness between them.

As they sat through forced television time, Samantha leaned over and whispered in Jack's ear, "How much longer before they let us go?"

"Ten more minutes," Jack breathed softly into her hair.

Samantha looked around to make certain no one was looking and licked Jack's ear as she whispered, "I can't wait until I can kiss you."

In the semi-darkness, Jack blushed with pleasure and kissed Sam's hand. As the couple finished out their mandatory time in the rec room, they were unaware they were being watched by Billy Watkins. Since Samantha had arrived at the orphanage, Billy had been fascinated with her, but couldn't understand why she didn't seem interested in him. Seeing her holding the frail boy's hand and watching their interaction, he knew that Prince Albert was the problem. What the hell was with Sam calling him Jack anyway? Something was going on between the bookish pair and Billy intended to put an end to it.

When the show was over, the minute the credits started, Jack and Samantha broke contact and raced from the room. Time spent in the rec room or the classroom was time that took them away from their attic and the special world that belonged to them alone. The couple anxiously made their way to Jack's room and went up to the attic. As soon as they were upstairs, their lips met and they kissed. For several moments they kissed before breaking apart and selecting a record.

Jack continued to teach Samantha all the dances he'd learned in ballroom dance class. Once she'd mastered the waltz, Jack began teaching her the tango, which made them both turn slightly red from the close contact. Tonight they were practicing the tango again and Jack was struggling to keep from getting hard as Samantha brushed against him. As the sounds of the Jealousy Tango filled the room, the young couple moved together with ease. Samantha flushed with embarrassment as she felt Jack brush against her, she knew enough to understand he was aroused and the thought made her feel very warm. Recently she'd been dreaming of Jack touching her and would wake up with a strange aching feeling like she needed something that he alone could give her.

Suddenly, Samantha stopped dancing and stared into Jack's eyes. Flooded by the images from her dreams, she felt the deliciously painful aching sensation she'd felt when she woke up from her dreams. Quivering slightly, she whimpered, "Jack."

The throaty sound, unleashed something primal within Jack and he kissed Samantha with greater abandon than he ever had before. As their tongues dueled they both became breathless and clung to one another. Slowly they sank to the floor, never breaking contact between their mouths. Uncertainly, Samantha guided Jack's hand to her breast and allowed him to caress her through her blouse. When his caresses made Samantha start moaning, Jack pulled back slightly in concern.

"What's wrong?" he asked worriedly.

"Nothing," Samantha replied and tried to pull his mouth back to hers.

"You sounded like you were in pain."

"N-no, it felt very nice," Samantha stammered and ducked her head in embarrassment. When Jack didn't move to touch her again, she inquired, "Did I do something wrong?"

"Samantha, I care a lot about you," Jack told her. Hesitantly, he admitted, "I love you."

"Really?"

"More than anything and someday when we're old enough I want to make you my wife. But until that day I can't- we shouldn't-" Jack trailed off.

"Do more than kiss?"

Jack nodded and reassured her, "It's not that I don't want to. It's just that I love you too much to, you know, without marrying you first."

Samantha pushed a honey colored lock away from Jack's face and kissed him tenderly, "I love you, Jack. Do you really think we'll get married when we're older? People don't usually find the love of their life at our age."

Smiling, Jack responded, "Samantha, we aren't people. You are a Goddess and I promise you right now, that I will love you beyond death itself. If you ever forget about me, I'll come back to you and remind you until you love me again."

"I could never forget you Jack."

"You're going to have to get back for bedcheck soon," Jack sighed. "Are you going to sneak out later?"

"What do you think?" Samantha teased and pressed a kiss against his mouth.

"I think I want to grow up a great deal faster," Jack muttered.

Laughing, Samantha replied, "Well tomorrow I turn 12 so I'm getting older."

"Quite true," Jack agreed and smiled as he thought of the surprises he had in store for her.

Samantha left and after bedcheck headed back towards Jack's room, when Billy stopped her.

"Going somewhere?" he demanded, standing in Samantha's way.

"Leave me alone," Samantha hissed in annoyance.

"Off to Prince Albert the Prick's room?"

"His name is Jack."

"Oo that's right, Samantha," Billy drew her name out. "What wrong with you Sam? You spend all your time reading and in that prick's room?"

Samantha tried to push past him and Billy pushed her to the wall. Pressing a sloppy kiss to her turned face, he informed her, "You need a man, Sam. Not some bookworm pussy boy like Albert."

Struggling against Billy, Sam growled, "His name is Jack and if you don't let me go I'll start screaming."

"Go ahead, then explain what you're doing up on Prince Albert's floor," he taunted.

Billy pressed another kiss to Sam's mouth and tried to squeeze her breasts through her nightgown. The gentle caresses of Jack's that had been so arousing earlier were frightening and grotesque in their harsh parody by Billy. Fear was spreading throughout Samantha and she was ready to scream when Billy was pried off her suddenly. Jack launched himself at the surprised Billy with a growl and forced him to the floor. After a harsh kick to Billy's groin, Jack started slamming his head hard against the wooden floor.

The noise attracted the staff who readily believed Jack's lie that Billy had drug Samantha up to the partially empty floor. Samantha was visibly upset and told them truthfully about Billy Watkins attempting to force himself on her. When the staff insisted she stop clinging to Jack and let them put her to bed she was upset, but Jack assured her she would be safe and they would talk tomorrow. As Billy was lead away, Jack began to plan. There were several people who had hurt his Samantha that he planned to kill someday and Billy was now on the list.

After a thorough scolding by the staff, Billy was left in his room and warned to stay away from Sam and Albert. But Billy was furious, how dare that worm attack him and try to interfere when he was chatting up a girl. Prince Albert simply didn't understand the way things worked and he had no right to aspire to a girl like Sam. He would see to it that Albert Jackson Newquay learned to stay away from the girl Billy wanted. Leaving his room with resolve he headed up to Jack's room.

The next morning, Samantha dressed rapidly, she wanted to see Jack alone before they went down to breakfast. Partially because it was her birthday and partially because she was still shaken from last night. When she knocked on Jack's door there was no answer. After several knocks, she opened the door and walked in. There was no sign of him anywhere in the room. Racing to the attic, Samantha checked for Jack there. Jack was nowhere to be seen and his be looked unslept in. Fear began to seize Samantha as she ran from the room...






Part 5

Age: 12 Years 7 Months

Samantha was frantic as she ran from Jack's room. Every morning she came up to his floor for a quick kiss before they went downstairs and had to sit among the rabble, as Jack called them. Whenever Jack had a doctor's appointment, he would mark it neatly on the calendar and none were scheduled until next week. Briefly, Samantha toyed with the idea that Jack was doing something related to her birthday; but he never left without letting her know. Two days ago he'd told her he was going out for a few hours that were related to her birthday and that he couldn't tell her anything more. No, Jack always told her when he was leaving the house and his bed was still freshly made from yesterday.

Racing downstairs, Samantha grabbed a staff member and informed her, "Jack's missing!"

Janice Fletcher sighed, at nineteen, she was working her way through college and hated her job at the orphanage. Of all the residents, she liked Sam and Albert the least, they refused to participate in group activities and looked down on the other children. There was something unnatural about the frighteningly intelligent pair that Janice found disturbing. The pair would remain silent among the other residents, but would speak non-stop the moment they were alone, she learned once when she stumbled on the pair in the garden.

Since the girl had come to the orphanage, the boy seemed the healthiest Janice had ever seen him. Aside from being quiet, Sam seemed like a normal enough girl, but for some reason she clung to that freaky Newquay kid. From the moment she came to the home and rechristened Albert as Jack, the pair had been inseparable. Although neither child had by any means the worst record in the orphanage, the pair made Janice very uneasy. It was almost like there was some big secret of the universe that they alone knew the answer to.

After a moment, Janice forced herself to smile and answer, "I'm certain he's around here somewhere. Maybe he's already gone into breakfast?"

"No! Jack is gone I tell you. His bed hasn't been slept in and he's not in the attic."

"I'm sure he's-"

Samantha screamed in frustration, "I'm telling you, something is wrong! I can feel it!"

Janice grabbed a senior staff member and told them, "The Newquay kid is missing, he's probably around here, but she won't listen."

"Now Sam, I'm sure Jack is just fine," the man soothed.

"You're wrong," Samantha responded and she began to cry.

As the staff began to congregate and were debating if Jack had wandered off or perhaps had run away, Samantha began to search the house. Hysterically she called out Jack's name over and over as she went from room to room. Jack had promised her he would always take care of her in her earliest days at the orphanage and she knew he would never leave her alone there. Last night when he told her he loved her, Samantha had been on cloud nine. There was no way he would leave after telling her he loved her or on her birthday, something was horribly wrong.

Samantha went back to Jack's room and climbed back up to the attic. Pulling the ladder down in the attic, she climbed up to the trap door to the tiny widow's walk that stood at the very top of the house. Jack had warned her never to go out on the widow's walk without him that the rail wasn't very sturdy and that the door had to be propped just so or it would close and trap her outside. Poking her head up to the widow's walk, Sam remained on the ladder and didn't step outside. Finding no trace of Jack she closed the trap door and climbed back to the attic floor.

"Oh Jack, where are you?" Samantha cried.

As she made her way back downstairs to see if anyone had found Jack there, Samantha prayed silently. God had taken her mother from her, he couldn't take Jack from her. Since her mother's death, Jack was the only person that made her feel loved or safe. She couldn't lose the only person who cared about her. Disheartened Sam walked down the steps and her heart froze as she saw two policemen standing in the hallway taking notes. The staff wouldn't have called the police unless it was really serious.

Panicked, Samantha demanded, "What's being done to find Jack?!?"

"The police are going to make a search of the house and if they can't find him then they'll put out a missing person report," Janice told her.

Walking up to the older of the two policeman, Samantha sobbed, "Please find Jack. I know he's hurt. Find him!"

"We'll do our best miss, now calm down and we're going to start searching," he soothed.

"Sam, maybe you could make so tea and coffee for everyone while they search," Janice suggested.

Bleary eyed, Samantha walked towards the kitchen. Billy stood near the door and leered at her. For the first time in her life, Samantha felt like hurting someone as she fought the urge to punch him. Taking the kettle and filling it with water, Sam started making tea and tried to calm down. Jack was clever he would be okay, wouldn't he? Staring out the window at the changing leaves, she prayed again for Jack. Samantha hadn't gone to church much since her early Sunday school days when that creepy Lucas boy had a crush on her; but with Jack missing, Samantha prayed in earnest hoping someone somewhere would hear her plea.

There was a great deal of noise throughout the house as the policemen and staff moved from room to room searching for Jack. The kettle whistled and Samantha poured it into the tea pot and watched the clear liquid turn amber. Before she came to the orphanage and met Jack, she couldn't imagine anyone meaning so much to her. Now with Jack missing the ache in heart told Samantha just how much he meant to her. Jack wasn't a schoolgirl crush like the zillions of boys Angel liked, he was the real true forever kind of love.

Resting her forehead against the large walk-in refrigerator, Samantha listened to the hum and wished she could hear Jack's voice. Turning away she walked past the smaller fridge. Every few days the staff would take several days worth of food and move it from the large walk-in to the smaller unit. Reaching in the cupboard beside the regular refrigerator, a lump formed in Samantha's throat as she got out mugs for the coffee. As she sat them down on the table, Billy stood in the doorway and laughed.

"What's so funny?" she asked.

"Nothing," Billy smirked. "Just thinking."

"About what?" Samantha responded, her voice dripping with contempt.

"About how your precious Jack isn't going to get in our way anymore," he answered smugly.

"What did you do?"

"Nothing."

Samantha stepped towards him and yelled, "What did you do?"

"Nothing," he shrugged.

Words Samantha had heard other girls use that she had never before said, sprung to her lips as she lunged at Billy. "What did you do you son of a bitch!"

The raised voices brought several staff members running, Janice arrived first.

"Sam!" Janice scolded as Samantha pushed Billy hard and raked her fingernails across his cheek.

"He did something. This bastard fuck did something to my Jack!" Samantha screeched.

Two staff members pried her off of Billy and struggled to hold her as she fought to attack Billy again.

"Tell them! Tell them what you did!" Sam insisted.

"Billy?" Janice asked wearily.

"What?" he mumbled sullenly.

"You'd better pray Jack is all right or so help me God I will kill you!" Samantha screamed.

Before Billy, could answer a soft and insistent coughing came from behind them. The staff turned and looked in the kitchen. Samantha broke free and ran towards the sound, it was coming from the large walk-in refrigerator. Vainly she tugged on the handle, it was broken and wouldn't open. The coughing stopped and Samantha pounded on the door and yelled. Terror seized her, as the two policemen pushed into the room and started to fight with the door. Several agonizing minutes passed before they managed to pry the door open.

Inside lying on the floor was Jack. Shivering and unconscious as the younger officer pulled him out of the refrigerator and the older officer radioed for an ambulance. Relief at seeing Jack was short-lived as the policeman picked him up and carried him to the living room and laid him on the sofa. Staff members ran for blankets and drug all the children except for Sam and Billy away from from the scene. Samantha moved closer to the sofa and took one of Jack's hands. His hand was ice cold in hers and his lips had a bluish cast to them.

"Jack! Jack!" Samantha begged.

Dark eyes opened sleepily and a deep rattling cough shook his trembling frame harder still. Confused Jack said, "Cold."

"It's all right son, the ambulance is on it's way," the officer told him as he tucked a blanket around Jack.

Raising up slightly and squeezing her hand, Jack rasped slowly and painfully, "Happy Birthday Samantha. Forgive me-"

Jack collapsed back, his hand limp in Samantha's grasp...




Part 6

Age: 12 Years 7 Months

Samantha sat anxiously in the waiting room of the hospital with Janice Fletcher. After Jack was taken away in an ambulance, the police arrested Billy and took him to juvenile jail. Through her fear, Samantha was furious that Billy would likely spend a few weeks at the most in jail. Someday she would hurt Billy, Samantha vowed as she looked up at the clock. Jack had been in the ER for over an hour and no one had given a progress report yet. The sound of the ticking clock was thunderous in Samantha's ears as time seemed to drag on forever.

"If they don't come out soon, we'll have to go," Janice informed her.

"No," Samantha retorted sharply.

"Look my shift is over in half an hour and I can't leave you here. The world doesn't stop for your lame little crush."

Turning her head very slowly, Samantha gave Janice a look that chilled her to the bone. "Lame little crush? I will love Jack until the day I die."

"Well you'd better rethink that one," Janice told her flippantly.

"What do you mean?" Samantha seethed venomously.

"You know Albert's sick don't you?" she asked. When Sam nodded, she continued, "He's been on borrowed time for a long time now."

"No!"

Softening slightly, Janice said, "Afraid so Sam. But you're young they'll be lots of boys."

Samantha simply shook her head. Other boys? Never! Jack had to live, because she couldn't love anyone else. If he died, she would never love anyone else as long as she lived. From the moment they met and Jack rechristened her as Samantha, she knew she belonged to him. He was her destiny, they would grow up and get married, like he promised. What was it Jack said once?

"Alpha and omega, the beginning and the end. Infinity itself. That is us my Samantha," Jack whispered softly as they watched the moonlight through the stained glass rose in the attic.

"Alpha and omega," Samantha breathed.

"Huh?"

Samantha ignored her and stood up. Before Janice could stop her, Samantha ran away towards the emergency room. She wasn't going anywhere until she knew how Jack was and no one was going to stop her. Dodging between staff and patients, she made her way to the emergency room. Just as she ran past a receptionist who tried to stop her and pushed her way through the doors, Samantha saw Jack being wheeled towards an elevator.

"Jack!"

The gurney stopped as he raised up slightly and asked them to wait. His voice was little more than a whisper, having screamed in vain for the first few hours in the refrigerator. A pair of IV's were connected to his arm and an oxygen mask was over his face. Although his lips were no longer blue, they were now as white as the sheet that covered him. Jack looked very frail as he offered Samantha a weak smile. At least he was conscious, she thought as she approached.

Reaching for her hand, Jack croaked, "Samantha. So sorry. Ruined your birthday."

Tears were starting to fall freely from her eyes as she looked at him, the stained sound of his voice hurt her heart. How many hours had he spent alone and shivering? The policeman had said Jack would have died from lack of oxygen if he'd been in there much longer. Why hadn't she gone back to Jack after the incident with Billy? His normally delicate features had a gaunt and haunted look to them. Samantha had never seen anything so frightening as the vulnerable and ephemeral quality of his eyes.

"There's nothing to be sorry for. The only thing that would have ruined today is losing you. I couldn't bear to lose you Jack."

"We need to take him up to ICU miss," a motherly looking nurse told her gently.

"Don't leave me," Jack pleaded, then broke into a coughing fit that sounded like his lungs were being torn from within. After a moment, he gasped, "Samantha."

"Your friend can come up in a little bit after you're settled in," the nurse suggested. She moved to let the orderlies take Jack up and stayed to talk to Sam. Once the elevator went upstairs, she commented, "So you're the Samantha he kept asking for?"

Numbly she nodded, "Yes. Is he going to be all right?"

"There's no easy answer to that," the nurse replied. "The Gauchers Disease will likely kill him eventually, but right now we're more concerned about the bronchial infection he contracted from the cold and oxygen deprivation. According to his charts he lives at the orphanage, where's the staff member for the orphanage?"

"She's-" Samantha trailed off. Desperately she tried to explain her situation to the nurse, "I want to stay with Jack, she says I have to go back. Please don't let her take me away from Jack. He needs me, please."

"I'll see what I can do," the nurse told her as Janice approached angrily.

"Damn it Sam! It's time to go, the hospital can call the home later about the Newquay kid!"

"Miss?"

"Fletcher," Janice supplied.

"Miss Fletcher, the young man from your home is very sick. Could you tell me who's in charge at the orphanage?"

After Janice gave the nurse the manger's name and the extension for his office, she grabbed Sam's wrist harshly. "Come on, we're leaving."

"Miss Fletcher, right now we desperately need to try and keep Jack calm and quiet. He keeps asking for Samantha, isn't there some way she could stay for a little while?"

"Sam needs to go back to the house. Sedate the brat if you want him quiet."

Janice drug Samantha away from the hospital and ignored her protests. Once they reached the home, Janice stopped at the house manager's office to give him an update. Sam ran upstairs to Jack's room and took his dark blue velvet robe from the back of the door. Sitting on the edge of the bed, she sobbed and buried her face in the soft fabric, inhaling the faint trace of Jack's scent that clung to it. Right now he needed her and they were keeping her from him. After a few moments, she dried her tears. Jack needed her, he wouldn't let her down if she needed him, there had to be a way.

An idea occurred to Samantha and she went up to the attic. Walking to the far end of the large space, she bent down and pulled at a floorboard near one of the bookcases. Last week, Jack had shown her the board and the trick to lifting it up, there was a space hidden underneath where Jack hid the generous allowance his parents sent him. When he showed Samantha he told her she could take and use as much as she wanted, he wanted her to feel free. Reaching inside, Sam decided to take about ten dollars for cab fare so she could get back to the hospital.

Her hand brushed something soft on top of the crisp bills and she lifted it out. It was a small black velvet box and she stared at it for a moment. Without even looking inside, she knew it had been for her birthday. Sadly she opened the box and looked inside. Gleaming up at her in the dim attic light was a narrow gold band with a small marquis cut sapphire flanked by two small diamonds. Trembling, closed the ring box and blinked away tears. Carefully she returned the velvet box to it's hiding place and withdrew cab fare. Moving the board back in place she walked slowly from the attic.

As Sam left the house, one of the staff members tried to stop her, but she simply responded, "Jack needs me. I'm going back to the hospital. I'll be back by bed check."

Samantha moved more rapidly as she exited the house, running to hail a cab and drumming her fingers anxiously inside as she waited to return to the hospital. After paying the driver, she sprinted inside and took an elevator up to the floor that the signs said were Intensive Care. When she reached the unit, a nurse stopped her and demanded to know if she had an adult with her and told her coldly that she had to have an adult with her.

"It's all right," the kind nurse from earlier told her. "This is the girl the Newquay boy keeps asking for. I'll watch out for her."

The nurse who stopped Sam, simply shrugged.

"Come along. I'll take you to him."

"Thank you."

"Do you want to help your friend?" the woman inquired gently.

Fighting back tears, Samantha told her, "I'd do anything for Jack. Please tell me what I can do for him."

"Right now, we really need to keep him calm and quiet. His cough is very bad and he's fractured two ribs from coughing. Just talk to him and try to get him not to talk."

Samantha murmured she would do her best as they stopped at Jack's door. Walking inside, she stared at Jack. The two IV's were still hooked to his arm but the oxygen mask over his mouth had been replaced with a smaller nasal oxygen tube. His eyes were closed and she could hear a rattling in his chest even over the beeping of the heart monitor that had been attached with wires that were threaded through his hospital gown. As she took a step forward, his eyes snapped open.

"My Samantha, you've come back to me," he whispered almost inaudibly.

"Shh. You mustn't talk. Of course I came back. I love you," Samantha told him and carefully sat on edge of the bed. Taking his hand, she was relieved when he squeezed her hand softly, but more firmly than he had when he'd been found earlier.

"Did they let you-" Jack's voice faltered and gave out.

"No I simply told them I was coming here and I took cab fare from the attic. I'll pay it back though."

Shaking his head Jack managed faintly, "Only money, not important."

Tears glittered in Samantha's eyes and she pressed a kiss to Jack's cheek, "You're what's important. I thought I would lose you."

A harsh cough shook Jack's body and he grimaced in pain. For several moments he gasped before catching his breath, "Never leave you. Love you."

Several moments of silence passed and Jack forced out, "Wish this hadn't happened on your birthday."

"It's not important."

"Have present for you. Did you find it when you got the money out?"

For a moment, Samantha toyed with lying but Jack expected absolute truth from her always, so she admitted, "I think I did, but I put it back."

"Will you-" Jack gasped. Forcing himself to take several deep breaths he asked, "Will you wear it?"

"Of course-"

"But you don't know what it's for. Not just your birthday. A promise ring. Want you to marry me Samantha."

"You mean when we're older? Of course."

Shaking his head, he struggled to get out, "When I get out of here."

"But we aren't old enough for a marriage license-"

"I know a way," Jack responded. "I love you Samantha and I don't know if I'm going to get to grow up. If you say no, I'll understand and still love you."

Samantha sat silent and answered, "On one condition. Promise me you'll live and grow up because I can't live without you."

"Try," he promised.

"Promise me, Jack," Samantha demanded.

"Promise," he vowed before succumbing to another coughing fit...