Deceptions, Lies, and Butterflies

The next morning, as John and Melissa walked hand in hand back to camp, Melissa found herself excited about their future together. It was uncertain, to be sure, but she knew as long as they were together everything would be okay.

When they arrived back at the beach, Sayid approached them. He and another man, Jin, were going to head out into the jungle to search for some of the survivors that had been captured and they needed John's help. They also needed to head out shortly. John could feel Melissa's grip tighten as they heard these words. He knew she didn't want him to leave. As Sayid left to finish preparing for the trip, John turned to face her. He could see the tears welling up in her eyes.

"Please, don't go," Melissa pleaded. They had only just gotten back together and now she felt she was going to lose him again.

"I'll be okay," John said, placing a kiss on her forehead. "But our friends need me. I have to do this." As the tears started to slip down Melissa's cheeks, he brushed them away. "Please, don't cry," he said. "I love you," this time he kissed her lips. "I better go gather some supplies," he then said. He left before she could protest further. His own heart saddened at being separated again so soon.

Melissa watched in disbelief as John walked away. No! She wasn’t going to let him go again. She couldn’t. But yet part of her knew that he had to do this. He had to help their friends. How could she stop him from doing so when she knew how much it meant not only to him but also to those he was trying to save? She stood there debating with herself on what to do. Looking around the camp she saw Claire and her baby and the cradle John had made. She saw numerous devices she knew he had help build – a set of shelves for a pantry, a makeshift table, and some chairs. And finally she saw the empty shelters of those who were missing. She knew then that she had to let him go. She walked slowly to his tent, dreading the coming moments. He was walking out, packed and ready to go, just as she arrived. “John, you made me promise you something yesterday, and now I need a promise from you.”

Taking Melissa's hand, John said, "Anything."

Melissa knew their time was short. The two men were waiting for him nearby. “Promise me you’ll come back. Promise me you’ll come back to me. Without you I don’t think I could….” She couldn’t finish. The tears fell freely as she looked at John. She knew it was a promise over which he had no control, but she needed to hear him say it.

Pulling her to him, John kissed the top of Melissa’s head. "I promise, my love," he said softly. He then stepped back and tilted her face up. Taking her lips with his he could taste the salt from her tears.

“I love you so much, John.” Melissa sniffled as she tried to be brave. “Now, get out there and bring back our friends.”

"I'll be back," John said, brushing her cheek with his hand. He then went to meet with the other two men and they soon disappeared into the jungle.

******

As days turned into weeks Melissa found herself watching the horizon for John’s return. No word had come on either the fate of the search party or the missing survivors. With each day’s end she felt her heart sink lower in her chest. He had promised to return but then she had seen so much death on the island that she knew it was an empty promise at best.

It was during the third week of John’s absence that Melissa started getting sick. She found herself nauseous and staying in bed most of the day. It was on her third day of being sick that Claire approached her and her first indication of what was wrong with her hit. Claire mentioned in passing that she had felt like she had the flu when she was pregnant with Aaron. After the young mother left Melissa began to wonder if she, too, was pregnant. She and John hadn’t used any protection. Was it possible that when the use of his legs was restored so was his ability to have children? The thought both delighted her and plagued her. She longed to have his child, but only if he was with her to raise the child with her. Until John returned, and until she knew for certain what was wrong with her, she wouldn’t rest easy.

As Desmond was the only one left with any medical training Melissa decided to confide in him. After all, he had been the one to bring her to John. If John trusted him, so should she. When she approached Desmond he asked her symptoms and informed her it did indeed sound like she was pregnant. He was able to locate a pregnancy test for her, which revealed she was. Desmond asked about the father and at first she was reluctant to tell him, but in the end she did. He had frowned at this news, causing Melissa's heart to drop. When she asked what was wrong, Desmond reported that someone had broken away from the captives’ camp. Someone that had been one of them, but had split off. This person had come with bad news. A group of three men had attempted to rescue the prisoners, but they were ambushed. However, it had been dark and they were unsure who the men were. All they knew was one was killed, one was captured, and one escaped. No one knew more than that, not even the names of who had been killed or captured.

Melissa went back to John’s shelter in shock. He had to be okay. He just had to be. The thought of not ever seeing him again was unbearable, especially now that she was carrying his child. All she could do was wait.

And it would be the longest wait of her life.