Breaking The Cycle

King Henry

Today is the first time I saw Katherine after I had forced myself on her. She looked a bit pale. I apologized to her, and tried to kiss her. She was so afraid that she jumped back in fright. I felt ashamed of myself. I had no idea I could hurt her. Fear filled her face as she looked at me. She had never been so afraid of me in her life. I remember I told her I would not hurt her on our wedding night, right before we consumated. I had broken my word so many times. I needed to make her trust me again. I intend on making peace with her. I will speak with her later this afternoon. 

Jane SiVad 

Her Majesty was resting again. Usually she would be up and about. I heard movement in her room before the door opened and she came out. I curtsied deeply. 

"Your majesty, have you rested well?" I asked. 

"Yes Lady Jane I have rested well and thank you for asking". She said with a refreshing smile on her face. 

"Lady Darrel". My page girl announced. I stood and recieved her. 

"Lady Darrel, welcome to my rooms". I said and she smiled and curtsied to her majesty. 

"Thank you, I have come to inform her majesty that gifts has just arrived, and is waiting in your outer chamber". She said looking at the Queen.

"Who are they from?" the Queen asked. 

"They are all from an Alejandro of Aragon". She said. My head dropped. Alejo sent the Queen gifts. After what she told him about the king, he probably wants to make a point. I hope her Majesty will not get offended. 

"Then I shall go and recieve them". The Queen said. Perhaps this will make her fill better about herself. At least there is a man out there who appreciates her. We exited my chambers and entered the Queens'. When the door opened my eyes widen. Point made.  

Queen Katherine 

I entered my chambers and what I saw took my breath away. There where gifts of linen, sleves and collars of silk, roses, bath salts, bath oils, silk robes, scented soaps, vanilla lotions, perfumes, and beautiful jewelry. All was imported from Spain. Lady Darrel handed me a sealed letter. I quickly opened it. 

          'I pray that these gifts satisfy you. In my heart you are the most beautiful and exalted Queen. You are the most enchanted woman I have ever set my eyes upon. When you are released from your marriage, I wish to court you. I will treat you like the Queen you are and love you passionately. I wish to love you and treat you better than your husband has ever done. Please, except my gifts and enjoy them to your pleasure. 

     With much appreciation and care
            Alejandro of Aragon'

My heart swelled with warmness. There was someone out there who cares for me. 

King Henry 

I bought Katherine a piece of jewelry and headed to her rooms. I decided I will make time for Anne after Katherine forgives me. As I neared the Queen's chambers I can hear women voices. When I walked in, amazingly Katherine was there and gifts flooded the room. Katherine had her back turned to me. She looked beautiful in her crimson and gold dress. She wore it nicely, the tops of her breast shown plumply. I had the sudden craving to topple her over and kiss them. But I quickly surpressed it, remembering someone sent her gifts. The Ladies curtsied to me and Katherine turned and curtsied low.

"What is this." I said as I was baffled by the magnatude of such gifting.  

"Husband, these gifts were gifted to me". She said, her cheeks brightened. I walk to her and looked her in her yes. I forgot how beautiful there were. Her clear water blue eyes peered into mine. I touched her cheeks, they were soft to the touch. 

"Who gave you these gifts?" I asked calmly. She hesitated before answering. 

"A new friend I have made recently". She said. 

"Leave, all of you." I ordered. Everyone left the room, only Katherine and myself remain. I walked a circle around her as I spoke. 

"This friend, where did you meet...them?" I asked she cleared her throat. 

"I...met them in Brookfield". She said hesitantly. I knew it made her uncomfortable to speak of Brookfield. Any talk of Brookfield most likely made her think of what happened when she came back.  

"Is this friend a man or woman". I asked not really wanting to hear the answer. She took a deep breath. 

"He is only a friend Henry. Nothing more". 

"I do not apreciate a man sending my wife gifts!" I said louder than I should have. She winced in fear. I did not want that. 

"Husband, I met no harm. He had no idea of who I was. I only wanted to see if..."

"If you were still desireable". I finished her. She gasped. I wanted to tell her of how desireable she was. How she looked beautiful in crimson and gold. But something kept me from telling her. Oh how I needed her to know of my love for her, but it will only push her away moreso. Maybe it is for the best, I have Anne and that is all I need now. Anne. My sweet Anne. The mother of my future son.   

"Do not deny it". I said. Any woman going through a divorce naturally wonders if she is still desireable. Ofcourse, Katherine is in fact still desireable in every way.  

"You won't hurt me, will you?" she asked afraid.

"No". I whispered. I looked her deep in her lite blue eyes and cupped her face with my hands. I leaned in for a kiss. The kiss was passionate for me but Katherine reluctantly pulled back. I gently pulled her closer as I deepened my kiss. I put my hands on her waist and pulled her even closer.  

Queen Katherine 

I thought he was going to hit me, but he did not. Before I knew it, he kisses me. I did not want it but he pulled me closer to him. His hands snaked around my waist. Then he pulled me more closer. His hands gently squeezed me from behind. His manhood stiffened in his breeches. He was gentle with me, one of his hands touched my breast and he kissed them. I did not have a corset on because it felt tight and I felt like I could not breathed. The dress I had on opened from the front. Henry knew this and opened it and untied my chemis stings. My breasts was out. He caressed my breast and brought them into his mouth. Henry's suckle was gentle in his warm mouth. I began to enjoy his gentleness with me. 

Suddenly, images of Henry forcing himself on me and the pain he put me through clouded my mind. I quickly pushed him away. 

"Katherine". He breathed out. 

"I am not ready". I turned away from him and went to the table to lean on. A wave of dizzyness came over me. Henry walk behind me and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. My breast were still out and he took one in his hands.  

"Please Henry, I am not..." 

"Shhh. All is well. I am sorry Katherine. Look at me". He said as he turned me around. I had covered my exposed chest with my arms. 

"I am sorry", he said as he cupped my face in his hand. "I did not mean to...rape you". He said. I nodded slowly and quickly began to fix my dress. After, Henry asked if I was well. I again nodded, I were going to say something but a small knock came to my door. The door opened and I could not believe it.

"Mary". My sweet Mary had come. 

"I thought it would lift you spirits". Henry said. I looked at Henry and smiled. 

"Thank you husband, thank you for your kindness". I said. He smiled and nodded. I walked over to my child and hugged her. I kissed her head and held her close. 

"You look beautiful mi amor". I said. She smiled and said "Thank you mama. I missed you very much and I prayed for you and papa everynight". My child said. I smiled

"I thank you for your prayers sweetheart". She nodded. 

"Papa says I can visit until the end of the month". I gasped litely and looked at Henry and nodded. Having my child here made everything much easier. She is my world. The very reason I get up every morning and put up with her father. For the rest of the day, Mary and I spent together. 

Two Weeks Later

It was March 27. Mary will be leaving for Hatfield tomorrow. We had such a wonderful time together. A few days ago I took her to Brookfield with Lady Jane. Mary had a lovely time and Alejo and I have gotten closer. He and Mary bonded also. He tour her and myself around Brookfield in a regal carriage that had three pairs of horses pulling it. I commented Alejo's gifts and he was happy that I enjoyed them. Today, I wore the perfume he bought me. Mary and I decided to walk in the gardens for a while, it was still early and she wanted to see the roses before she left for Hatfield. When we neared them I again felt dizzy. I have been feeling dizzy lately. Perhaps it is apart of 'the change'. My mother once told me dizzy spells are apart of the change. This time I felt more dizzy than usual. My eyes were starting to get unfocused. 

"Mama can I bring some roses with me to Hatfield?" Mary asked. I felt like I was far away. 

"Ofcourse sweet heart." I said. Suddenly a strong wave of nausea swept over me. My mouth began to water. I started taking deep breaths. 

"My Lady are you well". Lady Darrel asked. I could not answer, I felt like I could not breathe. That's when my stomach contents came in my throat and I vomitted on the gardens ground. I heard gasps and I felt someone take my hair out of my face. 

"Mama!" I heard my daughter screamed. Lady SiVad ran to her, and took her away. I was greatful for that because I did not want her to see me get sick. 

"Get the physician!" I heard someone yell. I stood up and my sight became blurry. My knees became weak and my body felt so heavy. 

Lady Darrel 

Her majesty has fainted and I could not believe it. I quickly ran for help. I rushed through the gardens and ran through the corridors of the palace. I ran straight to the king's office and I burst through the door. Unfortunely Anne Boleyn was there also. 

"What is it Lady Darrel". The king asked annoyed that I enterupted him. 

"The Queen has fainted in the garden!" I said out of breath. The King quickly stood up and ran to the gardens leaving an angry Anne behind. I followed. As we neared the gardens the guards had already brought her majesty to her rooms. The king and I quickly walked to her. When we entered the king was stopped by the doctor. 

"Your majesty". He said bowing. 

"Her majesty is being put in a comfortable chemise" he said. I was afraid for the Queen. I turned around and kneeled. Everyone in the outer chambers followed my example. We began to pray. 

Queen Katherine

I felt very tired. I knew I was laying down. I heard someone talking quietly. Then I felt someone touch my neck. Opening my eyes a little I saw the royal physician.

"Your majesty" he said and bowed deeply. I try to sit up in my bed. Then I realized it. I was laying in my bed. It was the very bed I was raped in. I quickly got up and leap from the bed. The physician came to me. 

"Your majesty must rest. Please, it is for your own good". 

"I am well, really I am fine". I said as I stood up. I begame dizzy once again and I almost fell and Dr. Linacre caught me and put me on the bed. I felt so weak. 

"Your majesty, please. You must rest and regain your strength". He said with worry on his face. 

"I will be more comefortable in Lady Jane's apartment". I said as I sat up. He nodded and opened his bag and took out a couple utinsils. 

"I shall arrange for it your Majesty, but first I must examine you". She says. I let him examine me. I felt uncomfortable with him touching me. I wanted to scream but I allowed it, for it was for my health. He checked my vital signs, my strength, amongst other things. 

"Your Majesty, you are very healthy. Have you been sleeping well?". He asked. Days after I was raped I had horrible nightmares and would not get sleep what so ever. 

"No, not really. Perhaps I fainted from tiredness". I said 

"Maybe that is the cause but you vomited also". He said. 

"It is noting. I am fine. I have been eating irregularly and maybe that's why I have been feeling tired and fainted". I explained. Dr. Linacre arched his brows. 

"That may be possible your majesty. However if this behaviour continues, contact me at once. Until then, I will give you something to sleep at night. You should wait a few hours before you eat again. I will check up on you in a months time". He said as he rose up and prepared his medical equipment. 

"That will not be nessesary. His majesty and I are signing divorce papers in two weeks. Most likely I will not be here". I said trying to keep the excitement from my voice. He turned to me and bowed deeply. 

"Your majesty, it has truely been an honor to serve you as my sovereign Lady. I shall see to it that you are still healthy by then". He said as he knelt beside me and took my hand. I gave it a gentle squeeze and nodded. 

"Thank you Dr. Linacre, you have dutifully kept me healthy throughout my reign as your Queen." I said respectfully. He rose and quietly left my chambers. After he left my chambers, I slowly got up and carefully walked to a chair and sat down near my vanity. My husband came in with worry on his face. He slowly walked to me and held my hand. I looked up to him and nodded. 

"Katherine, are you well. I was very worried".  He said softly. His face came close to mine for a kiss and I unconsciously turned my head a little. He looked a bit stuned and slowly moved away. 

"I am sorry Henry, it is only this whole ordeal that has me tired and a little weak". I said to him he nodded. 

"Ofcourse, this ordeal is has not happened before. Naturally you would be worried". He said, his cheeks redden in embarresment. 

"Dr. Linacre says I am well. I had fainted because of restlessness and irregular eating". I said to him. My hands toy with the soft linen of my thin chemise. Henry nodded and stood beside me. 

"Well you should be more careful with how you go about during your day." Henry went on and on about my health. But I found myself slowly looking into the distance. My mind went to Alejo and his kindliness. I thought about him frequently and little things reminded me of his presence. The chemise I am wearing was one of the gifts from him. 

"Katherine!" Henry said loudly. I jumped in surprise. He knelt to me and put his hands on my knees. I quickly but gently grabbed his hands. 

"Where is your mind, Katherine?" asked Henry. I opened my mouth but no words came. Then Henry did something he has not done in many years. He layed his head on my lap. I closed my eyes in remenist. He took a deep breath and caressed my knees. 

"Believe it or not Katherine, I still love you". He said in a soft voice. 

"I love you too". I said, I was not sure if I believed that myself. Henry lifted my chemise and kissed my knees. His hot breath excited me. He planted kiss after kiss on my thighs. 

"Henry". I whispered in a whimper. He continued his kissing, and his hands slid between my legs. 

King Henry

I had forgot how delicate Katherine was. As I slid my hand up her chemise exposing her slender legs, I could not help myself. I touched her, she was moist and warm to the touch. 

"Please." she whispered as I touched her. "Shhhh.." In that moment, I gently spread her legs. I could hear her breath hitch in her throat. I lowered my head and kissed the inside of her thighs. I push back her chemise and revealed her upper thigh and I stiffened at the sight. Gently I grabbed her behind her knees and pulled her closser to me. She gasped as I leaned up and kissed her breast. 

"Henry, please. I...I can't..." she stammered. I could not stop myself. I wanted to possess her in every way. I lowered my head and continued to kiss her thighs. I can smell her scent as my lips travel deep between her thighs. I pulled her closer to me and dwelled into her warmness. She gasped as my tongue made itself known. 

Queen Katherine

I was full of pleasure as Henry explored my body. I could not stop myself from gasping for breath and moaning his name. The familiar build of warmness in my stomach.  I set back and rest my hands on his head. As I close my eyes, images of the rape pour in my mind. I began to breath hard as I climaxed, the memories was to much for me and I pushed Henry away from me. He fell back on the floor and looked at me. 

"Katherine." he breathed. My mind became flooded with him hurting me. I felt as though I could not breathed. He came to me again and tried to put his arms around me. I push him back and stood. 

"Henry, I can not do this". I said turning away from him. He came behind me and he snaked his hands around my waist. 

"Katherine, please. Why haven't you forgiven me?" he asked me as he kissed my neck. His grip around my waist grew tighter. I put my hands on his and tried to loosen myself from him. Then he turned me around swiftly, grabbing me by my arms and pulled me close. 

"I said that I was sorry". He seethed in a whisper. 

"I am sorry". I said not knowing what else to say. He looked me in my eyes. He must have seen the fear in them  because he let me go. 

"I am sorry Katherine." he said as he went and sat on the bed. "I do not blame you if you never forgive me". He said softly. I felt sorry for him. I really did. 

"I shall forgive you, Henry. One day". I said truthfully. He looked at me and nodded slightly. 

"I am truelly worried about you, it is not everyday you faint in front of our daughter". I gasped as I thought about my daughter. I had completely forgot about her. 

"Mary!" I said, she must be so afraid. "Were is she, may I see her." I asked Henry. 

"Ofcourse." he said as he got up and came to me. He took my hand and kissed it. I nodded and he walked to the door and called Mary in. She came in and ran to me. 

"Mama!" she cried in her childlike voice. I held her in my arms and held her tight. 

"Oh Mary, my child. I did not mean to scare you mi amor". I said with unshed tears in my eyes. I held her head to my breast. I vow never to scare her again. I hugged my only child tightly as she cried. We spent the rest of the day in Lady Jane's apartment. Please Review!!