Delusions

Hoshi backed up as Jon advanced into her cabin, the smile on his face confusing her. He should be furious …

He snaked an arm around her waist, pulling her close. Her hands went automatically to his chest, fingers splayed over the worn cloth of his t-shirt. She shivered at the heat coming from him.

"Jon …"

He didn’t let her finish; capturing her open mouth with his own he kissed her. Hoshi's knees buckled; this was no tender kiss, it was an assault on her defensives. He tasted so sweet, without thinking her arms came up to wrap around his neck and she kissed him back, poring everything she felt into it.

Breaking off, Jon looked in her eyes. "I know."

Dazed from the kiss, Hoshi could only stare at him. "What?"

"I know you love me."

The euphoria in Hoshi turned to dread. "No … no." She tried to escape Jon's arms, but he only held her tighter.

"You do. And I love you."

"No … no you don't." Hoshi bowed her head, shaking it as she pushed against Jon. Panic began to well in her. "It was your injury, you don’t really …"

"I do!" Jon forced her head up. "Do you remember when we met? It was that faculty lecture at Harvard. You wore a blue sundress, and your hair was shorter. You looked impossibly young; I thought you were someone's daughter. Imagine my surprise when they introduced you as Chair of the Linguistics department."

"Secondary chair …" Hoshi whispered.

"I was struck dumb. I thought of every excuse under the sun to come back to the aerospace program there, just on the off chance of seeing you again, although I wouldn't admit it.

"I thanked God when you were chosen for Enterprise, but when you wouldn't leave early with us I about died. The Klingon language was a last ditch effort, if you wouldn't come with me I was fully prepared to throw you over my shoulder and haul you back physically. And I still couldn't admit why.

"I was a stubborn idiot Hoshi; I wasted so much time. You said you loved me last night, I know I heard it. Tell me you meant it, that it wasn't just something you said …"

Hoshi saw the insecurity in his eyes; she wanted to tell him, but she was so afraid …

"Jon, Starfleet …"

He could feel her resolve weakening. "They'll have to accept it. I've taken Enterprise out into space; I can live without her. I can't live without you anymore. It wasn't a delusion brought on by a bump on the head. It was the truth, a truth I had tried to ignore but couldn't.

"Tell me Hoshi." Jon rested his head against hers. "Tell me the truth …"

Great sobs were torn from Hoshi. He panicked until she managed to speak.

"I do love you, Jon."

Crushing her to him, he held Hoshi until she had stopped crying. Jon kissed her tears away until she caught his mouth briefly with hers.

"I'm scared …"

"I know. We'll deal with Starfleet when it comes up, and not until then. No borrowing trouble. Promise?"

Hoshi nodded, rubbing her cheek against his chest. Now that the nervous feeling was gone from Jon's stomach, he began to notice the various parts of Hoshi pressed against him.

"Sweetheart …"

"Hmm?" Hoshi snuggled closer, enjoying the warmth of him against her. She caught her breath as a hand slipped under her underwear and curled around her bottom. She froze as the other hand caressed the bottom curve of her breast.

Jon felt her stiffen and withdrew his hands. "Hoshi? Do you not want to?"

She stepped away from him, fingers twisting together. "I …"

"What's wrong? It's not like we haven't been together before …"

"That's just it." Hoshi shot him an embarrassed glance. "It wasn't really you."

"It was." Jon took a step forward, stopping as Hoshi took one back. "I really love you, it wasn't …"

"I know! But it was easy to think that it wasn't you. So even though we have … it's almost like we haven't. If you know what I mean." Hoshi looked almost sick with worry.

Jon smiled. "I understand." He stuck out his hand. "Ms. Sato, Jonathan Archer. I've long been an admirer of yours."

Hoshi smiled back. "Pleased to meet you, Mr. Archer." She took his hand in hers. "I've followed your career closely."

"Please, call me Jon." Pulling her close, Jon left just millimeters between them. He pressed a kiss just below her ear.

"Jon …" Hoshi sighed as the kisses moved down her throat.

"I noticed you're wearing a Stanford shirt. Are you a fan?"

"I hate the place." For some reason the kisses stopped. "I don’t know why I wear the dammed thing."

A low chuckle came from Jon. "Shall I remove it for you, Ms. Sato?" His hands slid under the shirt to rest on her hips.

"How gentlemanly of you." Lifting her arms Hoshi let Jon pull off the shirt. "My friends call me Hoshi."

"And these, Hoshi?" He tugged at the waistband of her underwear.

"If you please."

Jon kissed his way down her stomach as the scrap of lace fell to the floor, biting at her hipbones, dipping his tongue in her bellybutton on the way up.

"And this?" His hand skimmed over her bra, coming to rest on the clasp nestled between her breasts.

At this point Hoshi could only nod. Jon unhooked the front, opening it like a flower opens its petals.

"Hoshi." He slipped the garment from her shoulders, coming back up to lift her breasts in his hands, thumbs feathering over the nipples. A whimper escaped her, and she looked up at him with desire drugged eyes.

"Jon …" She pulled his head down for a kiss, holding on to him for dear life, pushing his shirt up, needing to feel him against her. She moaned into his mouth as her flushed skin met his, her nipples tightening under the rough feel of the hair on his chest.

"Oh Lord." Jon almost tore his shirt off trying to get at Hoshi. His shorts and boxers quickly followed. "Hoshi, sweetheart …" Her touch was driving him insane. Picking her up he laid her on the bunk, hovering over her until he could think straight again.

Slowly he nuzzled a breast, licking the underside, coming up to circle the areola, letting his breath pucker the nipple.

"Joooooon …" He could hear the need in Hoshi's voice.

"Hush love. Last time was too fast." Continuing to kiss her breast, Jon stroked a hand down her stomach until he got to the moist heat between her legs. They parted on their own, hips lifting to bring the hand closer.

Hoshi was panting by the time his fingers touched the outside of her folds; a shudder went through her as he delved between them. Leaving her breast to his other hand, Jon knelt on the floor and kissed the inside of her thigh. Her legs parted more, and he could smell how aroused she was. Parting her folds, he let his tongue graze her entrance up to her clitoris.

"PleaseJonplease …"

His cock jumped as she begged for him, and no matter how much Jon wanted to make this last he knew he it wasn't going to happen. Latching on to the swollen nub he nipped and licked at it as he thrust two fingers into Hoshi, reaching for the bundle of nerves inside her.

Hoshi wailed as her world exploded; grabbing onto Jon's head she held on to him, riding out the waves of her orgasm. She shuddered against him, remnants of pleasure shooting through her as he continued to stroke her, easing her from her high.

Kissing her neck he rubbed his length against her slick folds, small quivers going through her at his touch. "Hoshi?" he asked, poised at her entrance.

She nodded silently and he plunged in her warm depths, forcinghimself to set a steady rhythm that he hoped would cause her to come again before he did. But he was so close …

"Faster." Hoshi slid her smooth legs up his, wrapping them around him, urging him on. Tilting her hips she gasped as he came in contact with her clitoris.

He obeyed, quickening his pace. "Hoshi love, I'm not going to last …"

"Then don't. Come for me, Jon." She kissed him deep as fingers pinched his nipple; the exquisite pain sent him over the edge and he thrust deeply and spilled into her, his cock jumping with each powerful surge.

"Oh God," Jon gasped, putting his head next to Hoshi's, trying not crush her. "I don't think I've ever come so hard."

Giggling, Hoshi maneuvered them so now Jon was on the bunk and she lay on top of him, his erection still buried in her. She wiggled her bottom a bit, and giggled some more as it twitched inside her.

Jon propped his head up, looking her in the eyes. He pushed a stray wisp of hair behind her ear. "I love you. Better get used to it."

Hoshi turned her head to kiss his palm. "I love you too."