If I Had Only Known

Disclaimer: I don't own the Dukes of Hazzard, not making any money, just cheap thrills.


Warning: Slash, Angst


Rating: FRT

If I Had Only Known
Chapter 10


"I'm telling you Uncle Jesse I think we were wrong about David," Luke said after lunch a few days later.


Standing at the sink up to his elbows in hot, soapy water, Jesse nearly dropped the plate he was washing. "Is that what you really think or is that just guilt talking?" he finally asked.


"I ain't gonna pretend I don't feel guilty over what happened to Bo, but that's not what this is about," Luke insisted. "Ya know I had Coop check into David's background and he can't find anything wrong with the man. There isn't any history of him having done this before. According to Coop, the man has dated some, but he ain't never been accused of treating anybody badly or of using anybody. In fact it seems the only serious relationship he ever had ended because the other man cheated on David."


"Well that's all well and good Luke, but that don't mean he's good for your cousin," he pointed out, abandoning the dishes.


"Maybe, but I've seen them together and it's pretty obvious that they're both in love, deeply in love I'd say."


"So just like that you're okay with Bo being involved with a man, going against everything he's ever been taught?"


"I don't see how you think he's doing that," Luke sighed. "You've always taught us to let other folks live their lives however they choose, not to judge others. Why can't you let Bo have the same respect and freedom you've taught us to give to everybody else?"


"Because everybody else isn't my boy!" he snapped. "I ain't naive Luke, I know that men like David aren't treated kindly by the world, ya think I want that for Bo? You saw for yourself what could happen to him. What if the next time they don't just beat him up? What if they decide to kill him, or worse?"


"Worse than killing him?"


"You been to war Luke, you know how cruel men can be to one and another. Are you going to tell me that there ain't things worse than being killed? I don't want to lose Bo over this, he just has to find a nice girl to fall in love with and..."


"And what? Everything will be fine? This is Bo we're talking about Uncle Jesse, do ya really think he's just gonna stop loving David cause you or anybody else says so?"


"Then we've got to figure out a way to get him over this infatuation he has with David, I ain't losing another boy..." Biting off what he was saying, Jesse quickly turned back to the sink, focusing on the dishes he was washing.


"Another boy?" Luke asked when he could speak again. "Uncle Jesse what are you talking about?"


Sighing heavily, Jesse squared his shoulders and turned to face his oldest. "I'm talking about your cousin Travis," he finally said, choking on the name.


"Travis? I don't remember ever meeting him, who is he?"


"He's...was my son," came the nearly whispered reply.


Luke stared at his uncle in shock. "Your son?"


"Yeah."


"What happened to him?" he gently asked.


"He was a dozen years older than you, only sixteen when it happened."


"He died?" Luke quietly asked.


"No, not then. He realized that he was different, not attracted to girls at all. I won't pretend I was happy about it, but your Aunt Martha and I loved our son, so we didn't give him any grief over it. Maybe we should've, maybe if I'd told him that I didn't approve it wouldn't have turned out like it did."


"You know it don't work that way Uncle Jesse. If Travis was gay there wasn't anything that you could've done to change that." Laying a supportive hand on the older man's shoulder, he gave it a gentle squeeze. "Ya ain't got to tell me any more if you don't want to."


"I appreciate that Luke, but you need to know this so you can understand why I'm determined to get Bo back on the right track."


"Go on," Luke encouraged.


"A few months after he told us that he was gay, he fell in love with another boy. Kevin was a real nice boy and though I wasn't comfortable with it all, I could see he loved Travis in return. They were caught together by some other boys, who called on some of their friends to help them teach Travis and Kevin a lesson. They beat the two of them severely and then they tarred and feathered them."


"Oh god," Luke whispered, horrified by his uncle's story.


"They left them there to die. Somehow Travis managed to help Kevin along, getting them both back to the farm. We got them to the hospital right away, but it was too late for Kevin. As long as I live I won't never forget the sound of Travis screaming when we told him that Kevin was gone. What I didn't know was that Travis was gone too, even if his body was still here. He was never the same after that, what they'd done to him and Kevin destroyed his mind, leaving an empty shell of the boy he had been behind."


"What happened after that?"


"What could happen? Travis wasn't in any shape to tell us who had done it, so they got away with murder. Your aunt and I did everything we could to help Travis, but the damage to his mind was too much. A month before your folks died, my boy walked out to the barn and hung himself. I found him when I went to do the morning chores," he finished in a voice thick with unshed tears.


"That must've been horrible Uncle Jesse," Luke softly said, pulling the older man into a hug. "I can't even imagine how hard that was for you and Aunt Martha."


"You helped a lot. We were both just going through the motions of life, and then your folks were killed. Suddenly we had a little boy who had just lost his whole world to look after. As much as I wish your parents hadn't died, I don't know what we would've done without you to take care of. You gave us a reason to keep living and then your cousins added to that when they came to us." Shaking his head, Jesse pulled away and looked his nephew in the eye. "I thought that folks around here had learned after that to be more tolerant of others. Live and let live, but now, after what happened to Bo I see it happening all over again."


"I don't think it will Uncle Jesse. It was just Ernie Ledbetter and a couple of his friends, you know as well as I do they're always looking for an excuse to fight somebody. I don't think anybody else will give them trouble, for that matter I'm pretty sure I taught Ernie and he buddies not to mess with Bo again."


"You don't know that though Luke, you can't know that history won't repeat itself."


"You're right, I can't know it, but I do know that Bo is happier than I've ever seen him. Do you want to take that away from him?"


"Of course not, but he's never been interested in men before so there ain't no reason he can't find a girl to love."


"You know better than that Uncle Jesse. If your family hadn't approved of Aunt Martha, could you have just walked away and found somebody else to love?"


"That's different, nobody was going to beat me up for loving Martha."


"And if they had, would you have left her? Could you have been as happy with anybody else?"


"No I couldn't have," he finally admitted.


"Then how can you expect Bo to walk away from David?"


"How can I take the risk of losing him?"


"Uncle Jesse if you don't accept Bo's choices you're gonna lose him anyway," Luke quietly pointed out.


"But he'll be alive," Jesse countered.


"Let me ask ya this, would you rather see him live another fifty years with some woman he doesn't truly love, or only live a few months with someone who will make him happier than he's ever been?"


"Do ya really think it's worth it?"


"If somebody had said to you that you could spend one year with Aunt Martha or fifty years with Emma Tisdale, which would you have chosen?"


"That's not a fair comparison Luke."


"Sure it is Jesse, you care about Miz Tisdale, but Aunt Martha was the love of your life, so which would you choose."


"Alright ya made your point, I'll go talk to your cousin tomorrow."


"Good, want me to come along?"


"I think I should do this alone."


"Okay, if you change your mind I'll be around."


"Thank you son," Jesse clasped Luke to him, patting his back.


"You're welcome Uncle Jesse."


_______________________________________________________________________________________________________


"Are you sure about this?" Phillip asked his secretary.


"Yes sir, Bo Duke is on probation for making and transporting illegal whiskey," she confirmed. "In addition he has been arrested numerous times by the local sheriff, though the charges have always been dropped before it went to court."


"That's wonderful news, no way will David want to be involved with a man like that."


"There is one other thing sir."


"Yes?"


"Well it seems his uncle's farm is heavily mortgaged to a J.D. Hogg, the owner of the local bank and the county comissioneer of Hazzard."


"I knew it! I tried to tell David that this man was just using him and I'll bet it's not the first time either..."


"Actually sir as far as I can find the young man has never been involved with a man before and I found no evidence that he'd treated any of the women he's dated unfairly."


"Well that's surprising, but at least now I have some ammunition."


"Yes sir," she responded, hiding her distaste for this type of thing. "Was there anything else you needed Mr. Blanchard?"


"No Laura, you've done fine, thank you," Phillip replied before ending the call. Phillip leaned back in his chair, thoughtfully tapping a pencil against his chin. Coming to a decision, he grabbed his room key and left the hotel, heading for the Hazzard County Bank.


"Good afternoon, how may I help you?" the teller, a cheerful young lady asked.


"Good afternoon, I would like to see a Mr. J.D. Hogg."


"I'm sorry sir, Mr. Hogg isn't here in the afternoons. If he's not in his office at the courthouse, you'll probably find him at the Boar's Nest, he has an office there too."


"Thank you." Leaving the bank, Phillip quickly crossed the street to the courthouse and went inside. Seeing the office he was looking for, he walked over to it and knocked.


"Come in," J.D. absently called.


"Hello, my name is Phillip Blanchard," he introduced himself. "I'm looking for a Mr. J.D. Hogg, are you he?"


"Yes, yes I am," J.D. quickly held out his hand to the well dressed man. "What can I do for you Mr. Blanchard?"


"I represent somebody who has an interest in a certain local family, however before my client makes any contact I was sent ahead to find out all I could."


"Well the Hogg family is one of the oldest and is the most important family in these here parts," J.D. said, puffing his chest out.


"I'm sure it is Mr. Hogg, but it isn't the Hogg family I'm speaking of."


"It's not?"


"No sir, in fact the family I'm speaking of is named Duke. Do you know them?"


"Know them? Yes I know them, a bunch of troublemakers and lawbreakers," he growled. "Your client would be well advised to have nothing to do with that family. Say just what is your client's interest in the Duke family?" he asked, narrowing his eyes.


"Well I don't know if I should say," he coyly replied.


"I don't care for the Dukes but they are locals and I can't in good conscience tell you anymore than I have without knowing why?"


"Can you keep a secret Mr. Hogg?"


"You have my word Mr. Blanchard that nothing said here will leave this office."


Phillip, ducked his head, appearing to consider answering the question while inside he was celebrating how easy this fool was to play. "I suppose if I'm going to find out what my client wishes to know I have no choice but to take you into my confidence. The truth is Mr. Hogg my client has taken a romantic interest in a member of the Duke family. Now for reasons I can't go into my client wishes to know all that's possible about this family before making that interest known."


"Oh I see, well Daisy's a sweet girl I suppose. Certainly much more refined than the rest of her family..."


"Daisy? Oh no sir that's not the person my client has taken an interest in. I believe the young man's name is Bo Duke."


"Bo?" J.D. asked, clearly shocked. "Mr. Blanchard I don't know who you're representing but obviously the young lady has money. You should tell her that Bo Duke isn't to be trusted, why that boy has broken more hearts than I care to count. So many sweet young girls destroyed by his careless disregard for the feelings of others. Then of course there's the financial problems of his family, there's been a couple of young ladies who had a bit of money, or he thought they did. Oh it's just awful the way he took advantage of them. Used them for their money and then dropped them the moment they were no longer useful to him," he easily lied.


"Really? I admit I was afraid of something like this, but well you know how young folks are when they're in love or think they are. Well I thank you for your time Mr. Hogg, you've been most helpful."


"I'm glad I could help sir and if your client is looking for a young man who would treat her right, my own dear nephew Huie Hogg is currently unattached..."


"Yes well, perhaps once my client is over the disappointment we can arrange a meeting," Phillip quickly put the man off. "I really must go now, I hope to see you later Mr. Hogg, good-bye," he said, leaving the office before Hogg could reply. Returning to his hotel room, Phillip fell onto the bed, chortling happily at the information he'd gathered about Bo Duke. "Now how am I going to make sure David gets this information?" He asked himself, knowing that David would never believe the information if he knew it came from him.


_______________________________________________________________________________________________________


"When are you going to go see your uncle?" David quietly asked as he joined his lover on the porch swing.


"When's he gonna come see me?"


Pulling him close, David ran a hand over his lover's arm in a soothing motion. "I know ya don't want to hear this, but I think you're going to have to make the first move."


"I'm not the one who turned my back on family."


"No you're not," David agreed. "Now are you going to let your stubborn pride cost you the only father you've ever known?"


"He's always said that folks should be allowed to live their lives the way they choose, as long as they ain't hurting anybody else. So why won't he let me live my life?"


"I don't know Bo."


"Do you know that if you were involved with anybody else he'd be the first one to stand up for your right to be together?"


"Do you really think he would?"


"I know he would," Bo softly answered. "I just want that same respect, the freedom to love you," he explained, his voice filled with hurt.


"I wish I could make him give you that," David said, holding the younger man close. "I hate seeing you hurting like this and I know that because of who he is to you it hurts even worse. Are you sure I'm worth all this pain?"


"You're worth everything to me David," Bo quickly repeated the words he'd said so many times already. "I love you slick and I ain't giving you up, no matter who disapproves. I've never felt as loved and cherished as I do when I'm in your arms and I'm not letting go of that."


"Alright, alright," he held up his hands in surreneder. "I won't bring that idea up again. I will ask you again when you're going to see your uncle."


"You really think I should?"


"I think that if you don't do everything you can to fix your relationship with him you'll regret it for the rest of your life. I've known people who let their families go without a fight because of disapproval and I know what it can do to you. I love you Bo, I don't want to see you hating yourself later because you didn't try harder to keep your family in your life."


"What if it doesn't do any good?"


"Then you'll know that you did everything you could to make it right and that I hope will keep you from hurting later. At least consider it beautiful, please."


"If you really want me to go see him, I'll go tomorrow but only if you come along."


"I don't know if that's such a good idea," David voiced his doubts.


"Good idea or not, I ain't gonna let him be a part of my life if he can't accept that you're gonna be in my life."


"I ain't saying that you should, but this will be the first time you've seen him since that day in the hospital and I think you should go alone."


"Why?"


"Bo if your uncle were in love with somebody that you didn't like, what would you do if he tried to push that person on you?"


Bo sighed, realizing what David was getting at, though he didn't like it. "I'd dig in my heels and refuse to give them a chance."


"Exactly, so you go see him by yourself tomorrow and then next time I'll go with you or we'll have your whole family over here."


"Alright," Bo reluctantly agreed. Snuggling into his lover's embrace, he pushed thoughts of problems with his uncle from his mind for now.


TBC


I know this one is a little short but this is where the muse decided to stop. Hope y'all enjoyed it, please review and let me know.