Trading Lives

When he stood in front of Nimueh for the second time, his eyes were blind with uncontrolled rage.

'You promised me. It was my life you were supposed to take.'

Hateful, deadly cold, furious; his pupil already flashing gold, even if he probably did not yet realize that his magic had started to awaken on its own.
Raw power, crawling down his spine. Embracing his limbs. Feeding on his disgust, fear and despair.
Nimueh gasped at the sight; her lips forming a seductive, forbidden smile.

'I've never said that you can decide who will die, warlock' her melodic voice washed over him like an ocean, merciless and forceful during the storm. 'Your request had been fulfilled. Am I mistaken, or Arthur is still breathing, clueless about your sacrifices? Growing stronger every minute, just as you are getting weaker and weaker in your heart?'

'To save his life is not enough!' Merlin shouted with fury, taking a step towards her. 'Not when others are dying, when people I love suffer what I should be suffering.'

Nimueh took a moment just to adore the way his usually soft features turned into something twisted, unnatural, a monster waiting to break free. Her smile widened and flashed with genuine joy as she also took a step towards Merlin, closing the distance between them.

'Is that it?' she asked almost softly. 'You don't want people to suffer instead of you?'

As soon as Merlin realized her closeness and that the gap between them vanished to the extent of him being able to feel her body warmth and smell her agonizingly sweet, flowery fragrance, his movements ceased. She was right here, in front of him. It'd take a second to wrap a hand around her throat, or to turn her into dust with his magic, or…Or.
Here she stood, causing everyone misery. And he, suddenly weak and paralyzed by his own foolish emotions and restraints, couldn't lift a finger to end this.

I sacrificed myself and no one else. I will not let my mother die, witch' his voice broke, just a little. 'I cannot do that.' came out as a whisper, his eyes closed in pain.

Then he felt a pressure on his shoulder and realized that Nimueh was touching him tenderly, the motion unexpected and weirdly frightening. Her slender fingers dug into his skin through the clothing, somewhat possessively, demonstrating him that she was the one who stood above right now.

'And you can save her.'

Merlin's eyes snapped open.

'How?'

His voice, trembling and innocent, almost made her laugh. How sweet and delicious was this young man… how ready to be possessed, consumed by darkness.
Her grip tightened as she spoke slowly.

'Are you ready to do anything, anything at all? You must know that I've already granted your one wish…if you want me to do that again, a great sacrifice must be taken.'

Merlin wasn't frightened.

'I'll do everything you ask of me.' he declared firmly, holding her heavy, darkening gaze without looking away. 'I don't care about my own life as long as everyone will be alright.'

His eyes were as golden as the sun in its full glory, daring and expecting.

Nimueh shook her head.

'That is a foolish thing to say, child… you are a creature of might, of The Old Magic, powerful and able to change worlds, lives, creations.' her voice trailed off for a brief moment before she added, 'You will be.'

Merlin bit his lip, suddenly feeling uneasy again. He was desperate to save his mother, to keep Arthur safe, to get out of here, to die…to do something, anything, to put an end to this.

'I will do anything' he repeated. And he meant that. At least he thought he did.

Nimueh's full lips curved into the dangerous and promising smile of hers again, chilling Merlin to the core as words escaped her mouth.

'Lives can be saved only if you are sacrificing another life for them." She whispered, her lips close to his ear now, tickling it with warm air. 'Or… if you are able to provide one instead.'

Merlin froze in dread, uncertain whether he had just heard what he had heard, or whether that was only his imagination playing trick on his battered mind.
He took a hold of her wrist and shoved it off his body, fighting to regain his invaded space and separating the two of them once again in a sudden act of disgust and desperation.
The sky darkened above them.

'How…? Is that…I…' he realized that his words lacked coherency and sense, but wasn't able to stop them from pouring from his mouth. Something was wrong. What was happening? What had she asked of him? That certainly couldn't be that –

'Merlin.' she continued slowly, smile never leaving 'Are you or not, able to create a life?'

He took a reluctant step back now, feeling as though the depths of the furious ocean had already consumed and suffocated both his body and soul.

'I…'

He never wanted to. Not this. Not her.
His legs felt heavier with every step he took.
Nimueh did not move. Something flashed in his mind, a tiny ray of hope that maybe he had strangely misunderstood the whole situation, that there was something he had missed.

'How am I supposed to… I'm not that powerful.' he started, blushing at once as he realized the foolishness of his own words.

'You are mistaken.' he added defensively, the sight of a fake void he had just created between them painfully comforting.

This time Nimueh laughed brightly, her content voice strangely out of place, even while heard from afar.

'You know exactly how. And you will.' She smiled. 'You cannot decide who will die, but you can decide on a new life to be created.'

When Merlin stopped his movements, something changed again. The air around him seemed thicker and poisonous, making him frightened to exhale.
He had a feeling that if he took a breath now, he would end up dead in an instant. Maybe that would be better than…
Then Nimueh moved, her body swaying gracefully from side to side, beautiful and terrifying at the same time. Like a black widow, taking her time to savor the taste of a fly caught in the web, she was approaching slowly. There was no hope of escaping.
The grass underneath their feet was shining with morning dew.
Silent, slick steps echoed in Merlin's head like thunders.

'I would rather die.' he spat finally, making his mind. He was getting out of here, even if that meant that he had to fight and – possibly – kill. 'You cannot ask that of me.'

Because… because Arthur was waiting somewhere, unaware. Because he was…

'It is too late now.'

…in love.

It is too late now.

Merlin's eyes started glowing again, so bright that they almost blinded Nimueh. He raised his hand and started murmuring the words under his breath.

She mimicked his movement, holding her right hand to shield herself, the back of it facing Merlin. 'What do you want to do now, boy? Will you try to kill me?'

Her mocking voice rang painfully in his ears as he shot a ray of raw, destructive energy. He couldn't. He had to get away.
Nimueh's hand consumed the power, draining it.

'You do not want to kill me.' she commented, because that was obviously true. What Merlin tried to do was a pointless struggle, he would never gather enough power with an objective to kill someone like this. 'Do you really want to have it this way? Aren't you curious about the pleasures of flesh I could offer you?'

Her voice was promising, hot on his skin, making his muscles clench painfully.

No. No, No No…

His hands flashed again in an instant, sending series of furious bolts towards Nimueh. She tried to consume them as well, but the energy seemed heavier, almost impossible to grasp, and she couldn't help but felt a trail of blood on her leg when a ray of light cut her white skin.

"There is one thing I can't understand. You promised me to die for your mother, for Arthur, for all of them… and now, when I offered you a choice, you suddenly don't want to be the hero…'

Merlin's mind ragged. That was right. She was right. He'd already agreed to do anything. To die. To give up himself. And yet, at the moment he was suddenly trying to kill her because he had to get back on his word, because he couldn't stand his own foolish choices.
Because he suddenly wasn't truly ready to sacrifice that much of himself.
Because Arthur was there, alive.

'Arthur has his destiny to fulfill.' she said suddenly, as if reading some part of his mind 'If you die in vain, he will never succeed. What you do not realize is that If I die, he will not succeed as well.'

Merlin's throat went dry. He looked at Nimueh's bleeding leg and opened his mouth to answer, but she did not let him.

'Moreover, what you do not realize is that…' she turned her head, just a little, to look at him from a different angle. 'You are only a small piece of his destiny. And certainly not a piece you wished to become.'

Suddenly something blinded him, and Merlin was pushed roughly to the ground, his limbs shaking. Pain exploded in his chest, burning his insides, and he screamed in terror, realizing that Nimueh was strong, much stronger than he assumed she was.
His sight was still unclear and foggy when he noticed a shape hovering above him, judging him, mocking him.

'You chose a path for yourself today. There is no turning back.'
Merlin felt thousand different emotions rushing in his veins, shame, fear, disgust, pain, weakness, vulnerability. His head was exploding, his hands were shaking frantically, and he wanted to grab onto something, anything…his fingers kept digging in the wet grass and soil, hurting yet unable to stop.

'Merlin.'

Nimueh pressed her slender hand to his wounded chest, pinning him down to the ground. Waves of pain flared in his eyes as he gasped, breathless, tears on the verge of shedding. 'Please, I want this to end…' his mind was screaming in vain, leaving him hopeless, with heart sunken deep in despair.

He raised his hand, one last attempt to stop her.

When Nimueh kissed his fingers in response everything shattered into pieces.

After a longer while of silence she focused her gaze on Merlin's pained face again. He was … beautiful, one of a kind. So very special. Her thigh was touching his as she started stroking Merlin's hair with one hand, the second still resting on his chest.
So special.
And soon, they will become one. Slowly, Nimueh leaned over to brush her lips over his red ear again and whispered, poured words into him. He would be full of her. Full of her words, her body, her thoughts and mind, and they would share an incredible feast of magic power exchanging their body heat, taking each other to oblivion.
This was their piece of fate.
Her tongue darted to lick at the shell of his ear and his body tensed again, fighting to keep her away.

'I will ask you again, Merlin' she spoke, pressing at his chest, her hand warm with magical energy, clear and hungry. 'Are you able to create a life?'

Merlin closed his eyes.
He thought of Arthur, his golden hair, sword in hand. He thought of all the great things Arthur was meant to do in his life, how many lives was he to save. Someone like Merlin couldn't count in all of this.

'Yes' he answered brokenly, first tear escaping and resting silently on Nimueh's hand. 'I Am.'
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I had no beta, so I want to apologize for mistakes. They are, sadly, all mine. Sorry fot that, and I hope you could stand them somehow. Sometimes I wish I was born English just to write better in this beautiful language.
This story seems so wrong , and yet I'm only starting. It will be full of kinky Nimueh/ Merlin sex D: I plan on keeping Arthur/Merlin thing only on the mental level, not really anything more. You can inspire me and write your thoughts on that, though :)
Also, Merlin will probably stay 'dub-con oriented' til the end.