On the Subject of Morals

Disclaimer: This story is a work of love and for entertainment purposes only and I mean no offense to Joss Whedon, Fox or Universal. This story was written by before the movie's release and has events made not possible by the movie.

Jayne opens the door Simon's cabin uninvited to find Simon and I in compromising position. I know from my brother's thoughts that proper gentlemen didn't bop their sisters. That only men in backwater planets and fugitives on the move slept with their sisters. My brother wraps the blanket around himself, trying to look dignified. Simon is so funny when he tries to look all proper. His words are all jumbled and he gets all flustered. I only need to put my dress down and smooth it out.

"I need a bandage," Jayne says, trying not to gawk. "Remember how mad you were when I trashed the med lab."

Simon puts his hands over top on the blanket. "That's quite alright. Are my services needed?"

"You weren't just servicing your sister," Jayne says. He knows what my brother and I were doing. The images flood his pea brain.

Finally, my brother sees the blood dripping from Jayne's finger and says, "I should clean that." He puts on his shorts then his robe.

While we are walking to the med lab, Jayne asks, "Were you fucking your fourteen year old sister before she left for school? Or is this new?"

My brother is thinking about going Captain Mal and punching Jayne out, but Jayne would want to toss my brother from an airlock and I would have to stop Jayne's heart. So my brother's face just gets all red. My brother washes and disinfects Jayne's hand without the gentle bedside manner he usually gives.

Jayne's hand is all bandaged. Jayne smiled down at Simon and thinking about how cute he was but since he was fucking his sister and all tongue-tied around Kaylee, Jayne didn't have a chance in Hell of Simon noticing him.

"How did this happen?" Simon asks.

"I was sharpening my knife." Jayne is embarrassed that he had an accident with one of his weapons. He's the weapons expert.

"Don't tell the others," says Simon. "The captain wouldn't understand."

"Mal has all his high morals," Jayne says. "I ain't into virgin meat since that ain't the case."

I look up at Jayne and say, "Butcher knife," although he was thinking about Simon being virgin meat.

"You'll do your brother," says Jayne. "I ain't good enough."

"My brother is smart," I say. "It's getting crowded." I walk off.

Being crazy means I didn't need to put up with shit. I go to the kitchen to get an apple. I like apples when they are going down. Coming up they weren't so good. Apple bits on my brother's bed. He comforted me that night. My brother has good genes, and Jayne has moron genes. Simon would need much convincing to let me have a baby. He thinks, not a good idea with bounty hunters and Alliance after me.

My brother returns to our cabin. Mal wants Simon to watch me all the time, 24/7 mean nothing in space. Time is relative. Nothing to compare to. I say to Simon, "Always be chasing. Never stop. Now good time as any to have baby."

"Mal will leave us on a border planet and you'll be burned as a witch," Simon says.

"Silly brother. He needs you in his crew." I put my hand over his arm.

"He doesn't need you. Mal is a pick-pocket and petty thief but he looks down on sexual deviance." Simon brushes my hair.

"We have Book marry us. "

"According to his Bible, incest is wrong."

"According to his Bible,ht iht is left and pi equals three, but he wouldn't let me fix it," I explain. "It doesn't matter what the shepherd wants. What the captain wants matters. We have a home here that isn't going to change."

"If we're still here in two Old Earth years, we'll revisit it."

At dinner the next night, Jayne says, "In confided quarters should people act differently than they would planetside?" He is thinking about Book, our favorite sixty-year-old virgin. Jayne wants the shepherd in the worst way possible. He is hesitant to do more than make comments about his chest and how good he looks covered with beads of sweat.

"What brings this on?" asks Mal.

"You said I ain't got morals," says Jayne. "I want to learn."

"On the Serenity, we need to act like a team," Mal says. "One of us goes down; the whole ship goes down."

"Would you have sex with someone just because she was on this ship?" Jayne doesn't want the captain to know he's sly. He embarrassed that he wanted the Shepherd when Book insisted that it was never with a capital N.

"Whom I have sex with isn't?" He's thinking about the last time that he had sex with Kaylee.

"I think it was a hypothetical question," Wash says. "Not that Jayne would know what hypothetical is."

"I was just asking," Jayne says with a mouth full of synthetic protein. He stops thinking about having sex with the old virgin and think about his favorite subject food. "We should hit Ariel again."

Simon gives Jayne a look. "We could raid savage at any large municipality. There are more than helicopters for the taking. Kaylee could repair anything. It would be safer than half the missions we go on."

"I don't do dumpster driving," Jayne says.

Simon thinks his last idea paid well and they could sell used items with not as much notoriety as that laser.

"I like Simon's idea," Kaylee says. "Simon's last idea would have worked flawlessly if Jayne didn't get greedy."

"We've done savage before," the captain says. "Wash, Zoe, look into it."

Zoe comments, "Savage is better than cattle."

"I'll look into it," Wash says.

"Jayne, there is nothing wrong with wanting companionship," Inara says.

"It wasn't about me," Jayne insists.

Jayne whispers to my brother as I help them do the dishes, "So is your sister any good? Not that I do crazy."

"I love my sister more than anything. I was a trauma doctor on the top of field and now I'm nothing. I gave up everything because I knew that she needed my help." Simon puts the dishes away. "Don't criticize something that you don't understand."

"You're fucking your crazy sister."

"She needs to be loved and I love her." Simon puts the last of the dishes away.

Jayne blocks Simon from leaving the galley. "I was talking about my own morals. I want someone that I shouldn't."

"Why are asking me?"

"Because you manage to get over your own guilty conscious. Does the guilt bother you or is the sex worth it?"

"None of your fucking business."

"He's making me crazy. I see him everyday working out and I can't touch him."

"He's old." Simon looks disgusted. Then, my brother was only twenty-four then anyone over thirty was probably old.

"Do you think I'm old too?"

Simon thinks about his answer. "Not as old."

"He's hot. I shouldn't be telling a kid this."

Simon nods. "Have you approached him?"

"I tell him that he looks good and I touch him all the time. He's dense. I can't tell him that it is an emergency and he has to come to my room and take my clothes off. He'll have a heart attack."

"No, he won't. His heart is good." Simon laughs. He couldn't believe he is giving sexual advice to a man fifteen years his senior. "What does he do when you touch him or say he looks shiny?"

"He smiles. He doesn't pull away when my hand touches his face or body. Should I lean close enough to kiss him or move my hand up his thigh? I know that some shepherds have done other shepherds in the abbey so he might have some experience in the matter."

"Don't kiss him. Ask him directly. I think he would appreciate that," Simon suggests.

"I ache."

"Tell him how he makes you feel." Simon scratches his head. "What have you said to him and how do you touch him?"

"I've put my hand on his face, his chest, move my finger over his arm. Would you like me to show you?" Jayne gets into my brother's face.

Simon puts his hands up. "That's quite alright. I don't believe there is anyway he could misinterpret that. He's pretending not to understand. My guess is that he likes the attention, but he doesn't want to admit it." Simon didn't do in a round of psychiatry, but that is pretty obvious with bad bedside manner.

Simon goes to my cabin and holds me. We lie in the bed and hold each other. I hear his thoughts so clearly. He doesn't want to think about Jayne's problems. Jayne spoke to him because he couldn't yell gross and disgusting without sounding like a hypocrite.

Finally, his mind drifts to me. Simon, my big brother, want better for me. He wants me to be happy and well. He wants to repair all the damage the men with the blue gloves did.

Simon mutters as I hold him, "She can read my thoughts. If I didn't act on my thoughts, she would be more hurt. I'm a proper gentleman. A cold-blooded murderer isn't going to lecture me on morals. I give myself enough lectures. All because I'm fucking my sister. My God, that sounds horrible."

I couldn't tell him all they did to me. It's hard enough relive the nightmare in my dreams. All I could do is hold him and plant kisses on his brow. I know that incest is wrong, but who else would love me like he does. There are many reasons that incest is wrong, but most reasons are social, not bgicagical, and social reasons didn't apply being trapped on Serenity.