rate_review Reviews

You have a great story here. There are a couple of typos and grammatical errors, though. If you'd like I can beta read it for you? If you want me to, email me it in the body of an email and I'll correct it and email it back.
Thanks for writing.

Holy shit!! That was GREAT! I've always LOVED the Tony/Ziva pairing...

You are seriously good at writing this stuff... Let's just say it took me a few minutes after I finished to actually get to typing this. Can't wait for more!!

I love your story, as far as I've read it. I think that your introduction and motivation are believable (again, so far as I've read). However, I haven't been able to make it past the first chapter because you switch your tense back and forth, and it's very tiring to substitute the past tense for every present tense verb you slip in. An example would be "She slipped in to the bath with a sigh. She sips her drink and wrinkles her nose...He was standing there..." Past to present to past again. Perhaps a reread through or a beta could help with this? I'd recommend sticking with the past tense, although present is alright (it's simply much harder to write with and succeed).

Otherwise I like your story, and look forward to reading the rest of it and its sequel. Cheers.