schedule
August 26, 2003 at 12:00 AM
That was great have Lizzie's mom join them in their sex
schedule
August 23, 2003 at 12:00 AM
You always must remember to proof-read and spellcheck your work. I'm not sure how you can "humph" each other with "dildoes" in your "clints" but I hope it isn't painful. It would have been a nice fic if it had more detail and a little more realism. Who keeps a dildo in their purse? How could Lizzie (guessing that she's around 14) go into an Adult Video store and buy a video at her age? If do ado add a second chapter, please spellcheck and proof-read. Otherwise, it was pretty good.
schedule
August 23, 2003 at 12:00 AM
What . . . the . . . frick?
schedule
July 21, 2003 at 12:00 AM
If you meant clit by saying "clint", how can she put anything IN it... maybe you meant cunt?
You need some work and lots of proofreading.
-z
You need some work and lots of proofreading.
-z
schedule
July 15, 2003 at 12:00 AM
very good ! .. i wanna see wut happens with matt !!
schedule
July 12, 2003 at 12:00 AM
Okay, okay, there were many errors with this...but the thing that sticks out in my mind is this: How can having a dildo be proof of being a lesbian? Is that to say that only lesbian women masturbate?
schedule
July 9, 2003 at 12:00 AM
what the fuck is a clint?
schedule
July 1, 2003 at 12:00 AM
you could have done better because you werent descriptive at all. okay i guess
schedule
June 17, 2003 at 12:00 AM
Hmmm... Pretty good... It just has a few kinks in it that you should fix. For example, there are words in the story that have two capital letters like this - MIranda... You should also make the scene more detailed and stuff.. I mean, you should slow down or some.
Go.
Go.
schedule
June 12, 2003 at 12:00 AM
This is a poorly developed fic.