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June 13, 2005 at 12:00 AM
It's a shame that the cute yeoman Colt didn't get more screentime, so your lemon comes to a good use. Captain Pike's stubborness even with such a cutie for him to choose was a bit disappointing... here, you've made it work out in a nice way without sacrificing the story plotline. As usual, I might have liked a few cumshot scenes, even though it wouldn't been what the Talosians wanted. Perhaps to spite them? But otherwise, it was a delight to read, with humor, characterizations and storyline keeping in spirit of the series... well, as much as a all-out sex fic can keep in the spirit of a Star Trek story, eh?
It seems that the Adult FanFiction database problems have corrupted the story slightly, though. It's nothing that really hurts reading it, but noticeable enough, and a fresh update would make the story a bit more readable.
It seems that the Adult FanFiction database problems have corrupted the story slightly, though. It's nothing that really hurts reading it, but noticeable enough, and a fresh update would make the story a bit more readable.